Comments for http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml en-gb 30 Sat 23 Aug 2014 14:56:22 GMT+1 A feed of user comments from the page found at http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml Redheylin http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=96#comment29 Q. When is a riddle not a riddle?A. When it's in a PM Christmas card - it is then a "joke".Q. Is the term "riddle" a subset of the term "joke"?A. Not when it comes in a cracker. Thu 26 Nov 2009 08:39:18 GMT+1 Kit Chivers http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=93#comment28 What is the past tense of "Pigs will fly"? Swine flu. Wed 25 Nov 2009 18:58:56 GMT+1 needsanewnickname http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=90#comment27 Sid - yep, but you have to explain why. Wed 25 Nov 2009 18:39:16 GMT+1 xmarksthespot http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=86#comment26 What do you call a dear with no eyes? No idea (geddit) What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no idea. What's the difference between a buffalo and a bison? You can wash your 'ands in a bison. (said in a brummie accent)Enough already? Wed 25 Nov 2009 18:36:54 GMT+1 Sid http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=83#comment25 PG? Wed 25 Nov 2009 18:02:19 GMT+1 needsanewnickname http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=80#comment24 Andy, I remember when you were called andycrabb. But I won't tell anyone. Wed 25 Nov 2009 17:57:23 GMT+1 needsanewnickname http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=76#comment23 Septic! Yes! MTGG!Right (Oh, these are so corny, but here goes)Spell 'blind pig' in two letters. Wed 25 Nov 2009 17:56:15 GMT+1 Jonathan Morse http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=73#comment22 Surely they're changed every year, otherwise they'd be out of date. Wed 25 Nov 2009 17:45:38 GMT+1 andycroak http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=70#comment21 FF (11) Yes, thats it, I remember now! :)PF (13) Ah yes, musta been :(Crikey those were the days when we could change our names at will.Or even to Will.A Wed 25 Nov 2009 17:31:14 GMT+1 mittfh http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=66#comment20 Here's another one from last year, courtesy of Gillianianianian...What is green, round and wears shorts?A Brussels Scout!-oOo-And I'll leave you with this typically dreadful pun:Why is it dangerous to do maths in the jungle?Because if you add four and four you get ate! Wed 25 Nov 2009 17:19:03 GMT+1 mittfh http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=63#comment19 There's a whole bunch of 'em here:http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2008/12/the_weekbeforechristmas_beach.shtml#P73358120(Why repost them when you can just copy/paste a link to last year's bunch? :D ) Wed 25 Nov 2009 17:16:11 GMT+1 reasonstobecheerful http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=60#comment18 Someone just sent me a text. All it said was 'G N A B'I think it's bang out of order Wed 25 Nov 2009 17:12:54 GMT+1 reasonstobecheerful http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=56#comment17 Pasty JokeWhy did the pasty cross the road? Because he was Cornish not from Devon! Wed 25 Nov 2009 17:05:58 GMT+1 Septic http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=53#comment16 What's the best thing to give your parents for Christmas? A list of everything you want!Where can you find health, wealth and happiness? In a dictionary. Wed 25 Nov 2009 16:44:03 GMT+1 Septic http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=50#comment15 Frances.... I know, I know!!MTGG Wed 25 Nov 2009 16:41:06 GMT+1 needsanewnickname http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=46#comment14 These are so bad I'll take one of my Gran's jokes out of the box in the attic:How do you spell 'Hungry Horse' in four letters? Wed 25 Nov 2009 16:19:54 GMT+1 The Stainless Steel Cat http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=43#comment13 Q: What's homicidal and swims in the ocean?A: Nothing. Jack T. Kipper was fully supported by Social Services and grew up to be a fully functioning member of the fish community.Q: How do you fit four elephants in a Mini?A: You don't. That would be cruel to the elephants and besides, they're not proper Minis these days anyway.Q: Why are there no painkillers in the jungle?A: Because the parrots introduced meditation, karmic healing and feng shui, so there was no need for them.Q: What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo?A: A monstrous genetic mutation that would never have happened if scientists concentrated on important things like finding the Loch Ness Monster and proving that ghosts exist.Q: What do you call a reindeer with no eyes?A: "rendeer" Wed 25 Nov 2009 16:07:34 GMT+1 U14138029 http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=40#comment12 Andy (10) - And the following day somebody's strapline must have replaced yours!__________________________________________________At 11:12 AM on 17 Oct 2006, AndycStrapNoMore wrote: Happy Birthday Perry!__________________________________________________ Wed 25 Nov 2009 16:04:21 GMT+1 Stewart_M http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=36#comment11 How does Santa like his PizzaDeep and Crisp & Even Wed 25 Nov 2009 15:48:56 GMT+1 Fearless Fred http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=33#comment10 I think the AndycStrap could've been due to the start of us all submitting Straplines for the blog, perhaps? Wed 25 Nov 2009 15:47:03 GMT+1 andycroak http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=30#comment9 PrestonDo - but, its the only joke I know! And it was really funny the first time I heard it.Its going to be David D from now on, depending on whether my audience have heard of him or not.A aka AndycStrap (why was I that?) Wed 25 Nov 2009 15:39:51 GMT+1 Gillianian http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=26#comment8 Preston - ha! That's funnier than the joke! Wed 25 Nov 2009 15:18:44 GMT+1 U14138029 http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=23#comment7 andycroak (7) - Just a little bit of deja vu there!___________________________________________At 02:22 PM on 16 Oct 2006, AndycStrap wrote: A joke for the blog, as requested :What's orange and sounds like a parrot?___________________________________________At 03:17 PM on 16 Oct 2006, RobbieDo wrote: "What's orange and sounds like a parrot?"That would be David Dickinson wouldn't it?___________________________________________At 03:29 PM on 16 Oct 2006, AndycStrap wrote: A carrot is right. Though David Dickinson is probably funnier.___________________________________________Preston (formerly RobbieDo) Wed 25 Nov 2009 15:16:35 GMT+1 andycroak http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=20#comment6 Preston - ha! That's funnier than the right answer :A : A carrot. Wed 25 Nov 2009 14:24:24 GMT+1 U14138029 http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=16#comment5 Andy - I'll wheel out my wrong answer then:A : David Dickinson. Wed 25 Nov 2009 13:53:30 GMT+1 andycroak http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=13#comment4 I'll wheel this one out again :Q : What's orange and sounds like a parrot? Wed 25 Nov 2009 13:34:57 GMT+1 Gillianian http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=10#comment3 What do you call the fear of getting stuck in a chimney? Santaclaustrophobia Wed 25 Nov 2009 13:26:18 GMT+1 Scotch Git http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=6#comment2 Q. Is that a doughnut or a meringue?A. Yir richt enough, Laddie. It's a doughnut.>8-D Wed 25 Nov 2009 13:05:07 GMT+1 U14138029 http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=3#comment1 What is the difference between unlawful and illegal? Unlawful is against the law, illegal is a sick bird. Why is a lion in the desert like Christmas? Because of it's sandy claws. What do angry mice send each other at Christmas? Cross mouse cards. Don't blame me - you did ask! Wed 25 Nov 2009 13:03:04 GMT+1 Scotch Git http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/pm/2009/11/were_going_crackers.shtml?page=0#comment0 Pull the other one! Wed 25 Nov 2009 12:57:51 GMT+1