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The Spring Lunatics are Out!

by SOBorSOG (U11143988) 24 April 2008
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How many ways can a cyclist enter heaven? Well, from seeing the activities recently on my daily commute from Epsom to Croydon the possibilities seem endless, but here are my favourites:

. jump red lights, ideally as a 30-tonner approaches
. ride down the outside of a queue of vehicles, especially where there are many side turns, or where the road is very narrow
. ride across 3 carriageways of a junction to gain 10 seconds
. ride to the station with your raincoat open and its tails flapping over the sprockets
. attempt to overtake a big lorry up an increasingly steep, narrow hill
. ride on and off a cycle lane weaving round bollards into a busy trunk road
. ride the wrong way down a 1-way street and do "V" signs at cars that hoot you
. if you're on clipless pedals, and also a pretend club cyclist, stop at red lights and attempt to balance until the lights change

And my favourite:

. if you're grotesquely obese, ride in zero temperatures in shorts and T-shirt-you're immune!

What are YOUR favourites?


Latest 10 comments

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comment by Mr_Jinx (U5351385)

posted May 9, 2008

Sounds like you're the one who needs to chill out. Why don't you light a joss stick, settle down with some nice lentil soup and put on your fave Levellers CD, as you cyclists probably like to do, man.

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comment by __cats (U10798213)

posted May 9, 2008

Ahh, thats what I've been doing wrong. I need to change my music tastes to anti-establishment and wear my ipod while cycling and then I'll be a spring lunatic cyclist too!

Don't know if inhaling the joss-stick smoke will do anything for my racing though...

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posted May 12, 2008

Mr shifter's just having a prod at cyclists because he can't come to terms with peak oil and petrol prices going up and up.
When he can't afford to drive his car anymore he'll be unable to cycle with only his accelerater foot having any kind of muscle definition. smiley

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comment by Mr_Jinx (U5351385)

posted May 12, 2008

petrol prices? grr

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posted May 14, 2008

Jinx: I am chilled out - you are the one making accusations, I am calmly pointing out the error of your ways smiley
BTW who are the Levellers ? my music varies from Prokofiev to My Dying Bride, but never when riding (need to hear traffic behind me).

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comment by Mr_Jinx (U5351385)

posted May 14, 2008

Ask your scruffy pot smoking buddies smiley

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posted May 14, 2008

What a disgusting attitude is espoused by "Mr. Jinx" His reporting is similar to that in the "Sun" Totally unsubstantiated facts distorted by his limited vision/intelligence and being addressed by lots of correspondents who have a brain and some who do not, who take his depraved thinking seriously. He should have his driving licence withdrawn as a danger to the common man.

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posted May 14, 2008

He should have his driving licence withdrawn as a danger to the common man.
------------------

** Mr. Jinx is more related to the common man than bike riders in England.

Perhaps his liscense can be divided equally and distributed to this year's suspended TDF riders....bubbly..

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posted May 15, 2008

"Ask your scruffy pot smoking buddies" .. no, you made the point so you should answer !
And smoking buddies is hardly how a group of cyclists would be described ... this forum is for sporting cyclists not hippy types as you appear to be alluding to.

What exactly is your problem with cylists ?

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comment by Mr_Jinx (U5351385)

posted May 15, 2008

I'm just tired of swerving/breaking to avoid lemming cyclists who seem determined to propel themselves into the path of my car. erm

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