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Magpies madness

Premier League Newcastle United
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Sam Allardyce

Newcastle United is the club that has made calamity its middle name - the long-running joke that still raises belly-laughs around the football world.

Sympathy will be in short supply for Sam Allardyce, whose heady combination of bluster and concrete-hard self-belief convinced him his feats at Bolton made him the perfect fit for an impossible job.

Newcastle can change managers, which they do with alarming regularity, or even change owners as they have done with Mike Ashley replacing Freddy Shepherd.

One thing, however, remains consistent. Namely the fault-line of shambolic self-destruction that runs straight through the middle of St James' Park and has contributed to almost 40 years without a major trophy.

And it has cracked the club wide open again with the departure of Allardyce after only 24 games and eight months, no time to prove a case for or against any manager.

But this is Newcastle and only the rules of the madhouse apply.

Newcastle is the club that loves to parade itself as big time. You can hear it now. Look at all those fans. Look at the beautiful stadium.

The trouble is that the finest shop window in the world is no use when the goods at the back are shoddy and almost beyond repair. In terms of football success, Newcastle are strictly small-time and there is no sign of that changing any time soon.

Allardyce's appointment was ill-fated and unpopular, but that was never going to be enough to stop Shepherd signing the man who saw himself as Tyneside's "People's Champion".

The people never wanted Allardyce and his basic brand of football. Just like they never really wanted Glenn Roeder before him, a nightwatchman manager badly out of his depth if ever there was one.

And Allardyce was almost instantly undermined when Shepherd, the man who lured him, was ousted out of the Newcastle boardroom by Ashley.

The credits were rolling for Big Sam. Unloved by the Toon Army and unappointed by his owner, he was history almost from day one. Typical Newcastle.

But when the laughing stops, Newcastle is left as a club that could be great, but never will be until it starts acting in a manner that its fans deserve.

The trail of destruction that led to the leaving of Allardyce stretches back a long way.

Newcastle almost cracked it with Kevin Keegan. A decent and dignified man backed by an ambitious and wealthy chairman in Sir John Hall, providing superstars and stylish football in equal measure, he almost brought the title to Tyneside.

Sadly, once Keegan left, Newcastle never quite regained balance other than a spell under Sir Bobby Robson.

Kenny Dalglish was hastily shown the door having committed the crime of not being Keegan, Ruud Gullit's sexy football swiftly floundered and Graeme Souness was another unpopular appointment after Robson.

Managers were backed with cash, but there was an almost scattergun approach to management and recruitment. There was no clarity of thinking on or off the pitch and it has produced chaos.

It was a fault that lasted to the end, with Allardyce's backroom staff resembling a large commune rather than a tightly-knit team assisting the manager.

The constant managerial changes and turn-over of playing staff is no recipe for success at any level, least of all in the increasingly competitive Premier League environment.

And the sight of owner Ashley basking behind the goal with fans in his Newcastle shirt does little to fill anyone with confidence for the future.

It may make him look like the man of the people - but it is not the behaviour of a real football chairman. He must make hard-headed decisions, not indulge in policy on the hoof shaped by the shouts of a baying mob.

Ashley must get himself back to the directors' box, get a new manager, and give Newcastle United some continuity.

Alan Shearer is the popular choice as Allardyce's successor - and the brutal truth is Newcastle's fans will not be satisfied with anyone until their hero has had a crack.

This would still be a gamble, even if Shearer can be persuaded. He has no managerial experience, although you would not bet against him succeeding.

Newcastle now needs something it has not had in a generation. Namely a period of calm and stability to allow the club to grow and then flourish.

Is Ashley the man for this? The jury is very much out and his credentials are on the line with this appointment.

Until then, Newcastle will remain the Premiership's finest old music hall act, giving laughs and entertainment a-plenty to everyone but their own suffering supporters.

Latest 10 comments

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posted Jan 13, 2008

"I wouldn't say no to Mourinho as manager"

And I wouldn't say no to Billy Piper as a girlfriend!

I reckon the odds are comparable.

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posted Jan 13, 2008

why do Newcastle fans and the club assume they are still a huge club, what have you won in the last 50 years? Nothing worth talking about. Alan Shearer is unproven, you take him as a manager and it goes wrong, you will end up disliking him. Sacking Allerdyce was a mistake.

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posted Jan 13, 2008

Sadly i can't speak as Stan Seymour, but only as his grandson. I lived with Stan during much of my childhood. So I spent a lot of Saturdays attending St James to watch the first team or the Central League. I also travelled many saturdays to watch young hopefuls on which Stan had his eye. Never exciting places, but in the 3rd Div North or the Second scottish league.
The formula was always the same. On Saturday at the away matches, there would be the "special " lunch. I can't remember what is was, nothing too special I thought.
As he used to say, today's teams would thrash his teams because they are much fitter. I left Newcastle and followed my life overseas, ending in Hong Kong and now in Canada. But every saturday or Sunday it was always the same, to find out how Newcastle had fared. i am one of the silent band of followers, and I sympathise with my more vocal friends who want Newcastle back to its former glory.
They should remember that after Stan stopped playing for Newcastle, he went to lesser clubs. He and my grandma kept a shop in Newcastle where many came to buy their sports kit and most of all meet the great man and have a chat. I even saw and held the FA Cup a few times back in the 50s.
After he left Newcastle the club fell on very hard times. By that time Stan was writing for the Express. ( probably the equivalent of commenting on the BBC. Listen up Alan). The board of directors asked him to come back, initially at an arm's length. But the rest of the story is in the reocrds, ending in the 1950's. The crucial point is that the then owners of the club gave Stan a few percentage points ownership in the club. They were weren't worth a lot in those days. But it meant commitment. The salary he received was pitiful by today's standards. But then he was a great supporter of removal of the minumum wage for the players...... and it nearly had him drummed out of the FA. He had to agree not to publish his book which contained a chapter on this subject.
The football business is a business, I agree. But there are two sorts of businesses. People businesses, and asset based businesses. In people based businesses you need to give people ownership to tie their hearts and minds and get commitment. It isn't just about the money. ( Believe me, it has been my life)
So, Mr Ashley, break the mould. Find a sparkler and give him part of the club over five years. ( If he doesn't stay he can give back the shares) Not every club has a Russian oligarch behind it. A good but not special salary, and most of all, commitment. Building a team, and a business takes time. have a committed board to help the club. And find out if Mr Shearer is up to it.

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posted Jan 13, 2008

I am so glad Redknapp refused the Newcastle offer. His Portsmouth team could not even beat Sunderland, which a requirement of any Newcastle manager.

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posted Jan 13, 2008

Lets be honest with ourselves we all want silverware and yes we are a big club but we dont have the players that we need to win we certainly dont have the depth in our squad!!

We need a manager who will come in and sort out our defence yes big sam started this but the players are not the standard we expect. We also need a natural goal scorer which we lack at the moment.

Is it any wonder Harry said no!? Look at our expectations. If i was a manager as much as i love the club you would have doubts about taking on this challenge it could seriously hamper you credability. In a dream world we would have Shearer learning under Keegan.

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posted Jan 13, 2008

There is not enought players on the Team with the required passion to progree the team beyond mid table. I think the problem lies with the players and the coaching and not with the management. One thing the players lack in abundance is spatial awareness, they run scurry around like rats stopping every now and again to see where every one is or was in most cases. Teams like Arsenal and Manchester United seem almost telepathetic in comparison. I we had a few more players with the required passion and a little more awareness of where there team mates are, or are going to be, we would be a lot higher up the table. To win you have got to want it, when was the last time you seen a Newcastle forward pointing to the ground in front of him asking for the ball to be played where he was pointing?

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posted Jan 14, 2008

6-0 can you blame Sam A for this one, i think not...like i said before, it's the rubbish players that need to be sacked. then you can think about getting a manager.

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posted Jan 14, 2008

6-0... hahahaha!!

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posted Jan 14, 2008

We don't expect much from ManU fans. Not even an IQ in double figures

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posted Jan 14, 2008

i thought you were outplayed by man u in the end

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