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Nothing for the weekend

by Robbo Robson (U5722413) 22 October 2007
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Derek 'Robbo' Robson

Well that was a crap weekend all round.

It started for me with an afternoon watching perennial Riverside losers Chelsea, complete with Diddums Didier the love-sick striker.

What a big whopper that was. He was his usual majestic self, as was Mr Cech, and Boro were cooked after the freaky free-kick from Alex which almost had me on my feet applauding, before a gruff voice told me to "sit back in your seat before I wrap it round your earholes" (these Teesside St John's Ambulance men can be quite partisan).

Still, thought I, why worry about local squabbles when men adorned with the red rose of England are going to step out and achieve the most unlikely World Cup triumph ever.... er, yeah.

All I can say is, thank God I was supporting someone. I'd be surprised if there was a neutral on the planet who hadn't switched off by half-time. There was a lot of what my Dad calls 'hyperbowl' from the combox, but by God it was bloody dreary stuff.

What made it worse was that England, who were duty-bound to be dull, were more exciting than the Boks.

Was it a try? Well it was from where I was sitting. Although to be fair, the video ref wasn't making his decision from a crowded boozer with 30 Smoggies bellowing: "Try, Try, Try!"

By the by, why was Gordon Brown there? I've got absolutely no problem with a Scot being PM, so long as he doesn't pretend he's English from time to time. It just doesn't suit the bloke. You are Scottish, mate!

Just because it may take a long time for your countrymen to reach the final of anything, it doesn't mean you have to gatecrash the English party.

I think it would've been good to see him react like every other Scot I've met since Saturday, and say "bad luck, pal", with a barely-disguised smile playing around his lips.

Many have said that it was a great tournament, which was true. Except to a neutral bandwagoner like meself, they're going to have to do summat about this Chuckle Brothers 'to me, to you' style of play where they just kick the bloody thing to each other for hours on end, while the big lunks play piggy in the middle. I've had more fun shopping for tops for me missus.

Personally, I'd make the whole thing more interesting by removing two men from each side, getting rid of the rucks and mauls and calling it rugby league.

Still, England did remarkably just to get there - be happy with that, right? And turn our attentions to the millionaire's playground that is F1.

This is one sport that gets right up my pigging nose, but for one season only I'm prepared to admit that it got pretty exciting.

Team McLaren were entirely responsible for that. Given McLaren make dead good push-chairs, it seems appropriate that their drivers behaved like spoilt one-year-olds all year.

There was an uneasy truce in Brazil, probably prompted by Uncle Ron Dennis pulling them to one side and yelling: "Lewie, Fernie! Share your toys!"

Of course, even now, they're disputing Raikkonen's crown 'cos of some garbage about petrol temperature. Boo-hoo! Some of the others had very, very slightly cooler petrol than us and that meant they were marginally faster! Shut up, man! It's really undiginified and desperate.

I knew it was going to be a bad day for Hamilton when EVERYONE kept saying how cool he was looking. That made no sense. He should have been bricking it.

Sure enough, he drove like a peeved kid on the first lap, then the toy stopped working for a bit and that was it, game over.

Hamilton's been charm itself since and, of course, once again, you could say it's a miracle he lost the thing by a single point in his first season. But he bottled it, that's for sure. Although unlike the senior citizens of England's XV, you know there's time for the lad.

All in all, you're left with that feeling English sportsmen are better than any other when it comes to one thing. Heroic Defeat. Agonising Failure. Noble Effort. And it's bloody depressing.

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posted Oct 23, 2007

McLaren, I believe, was born and raised in York.

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posted Oct 23, 2007

They never did quite forgive us for the hanging, drawing and quartering of Mel Gibson. Gordy Broon is the payback.

Anyway Andy Morris will change his nationality when he moves to Monaco as a tax exile.

It makes me laugh all those people demanding investment in British tennis so that a bunch of well heeled southerners can start winning on the professional circuit, become millionaires and then move overseas.

Yeah, tennis is even more dreary than Formula 1.

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posted Oct 23, 2007

Good column as usual Robbo...

But i have to disagree about a Scotsman being PM. Gordon Brown can go sling his hook. The scottish have their own Parliament, in which NO englishman are allowed to be part of. Should me the same for the commons.

The feeling on an english heroic defeat is so true. As an Englishman living in Wales, i had to put up with the Welsh banging on about us losing to the Boks, whilst I'm trying to enjoy a few Jack Daniels and look at some skirt (occasionally up where possible hehe). This almost led to a few fists being chucked about.

Yep, time for McClown to go and bring in someone who will not be pressured by the press when selecting the squad and forge a team worthy of being called a team, rather than a bunch of over-paid and over-inflated egos.

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posted Oct 24, 2007

gee_mcfc if you feel that scots should not be allowed into the British parliament where major decisions about there lives are made, ie defence, finanace, foreign affairs etc, does that mean the welsh (devolved assambly) and northern Irish should not be there either. In that case you would not be able to vote for a someone to represent you on these major issues since you live in Wales.
English votes for English only issues is quite different and does not prevent MPs from other parts of the UK taking part on British issues.
I will be supporting Hatton and Calzaghe in their upcomming fights and certainly wanted Hamiltion to win Do the anti Murray brigade want him to lose when he plays for Britain alongside Henman in the Davis cup.

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posted Oct 24, 2007

Gordon Brown was probably there because he's a rugby fan (he only stopped playing when he lost an eye in a game), it was only over the water and I think he gets Saturday evenings off or something. I didn't notice him wearing an England scarf.

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comment by henhao (U3083416)

posted Oct 24, 2007

Too right that it was an extremely boring game on Saturday. It is difficult to get excited about rugby and the fact that it was the only final we are likely to get to for a long time in any sports with a big following made it worth watching. Most of it was kick and rush...

I am far more depressed about the football wher after three decent games I thought we would at least snatch a point in Russia. We have the makings of a strong team now there is less emphasis on personality rather than team, but I am a bit concerned that having Rooney and Owen in the same team might be disruptive. They are great players but if they cant get the ball in international football then what is the point of having them?

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posted Oct 24, 2007

F1? Granted it's better than here in America where they like NASCAR, which is F1 with a lobotomy. But really what's next sailing, darts, snooker? I read your articles because of football. I can live with rugby and will even tolerate a bit of cricket, but really Robbo I would never want to sit down with you, draw a pint and watch F1. ale

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posted Oct 24, 2007

Robbo you're right.

An entirely depressing last week indeed.

I have had it with refs.
Firstly we get stuffed by a penalty that never was and now have to rely on Russia making a mistake. Not likely knowing Hiddink.

Next we get a try rejected even by the video ref when all could see it was good!!

Now what will all the people shouting for videos refs in football say.

Lastly we get Hamilton making a mess of it (again) should have been champ the last race!

When are we ever going to win anything?

Despair!

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posted Oct 25, 2007

Give Hamilton a chance - he's only 22! How many F1 Championships had you won at that age?

Still think it's boring like and I'd rather watch the traffic on the M25.

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posted Oct 25, 2007

"How many F1 Championships had you won at that age?"

4 - but then I had a nasty off-track spat with Gerhard Berger that led to my premature retirement.

whistle


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