BBC - 606 - - A23934765 - Angel of the North?

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Angel of the North?

by Robbo Robson (U5722413) 18 June 2007

Did you see? A Teessider won the US Open! Yeah I know his name's Cabrera and he claims to hail from Argentina, but as Loyd Grossman would say, "Lets look at the evidence".

Angel Cabrera is a chubby smoker with quick hands. As any Boro lass will tell ya - that's every other fella in town of a Friday night.

Dunno why it makes me so happy to see unhealthy looking specimens win sports tournaments. Actually, I do. There doesn't seem to be a pastime left in this world that doesn't require some fascistic regime of diet and exercise. Even some of your modern darts players look - how can I put this? - vegetarian.

All them sweaty scrawny nutters on the trendy treadmills, doing 5k on the self-same spot before bolting down some chicken pasta garbage and a joyless squirt of Adam's ale. For Gawd's sake people, you need a pie and a pint!

Yes, Freddie and the Drinkers may have been out of line in the Caribbean but to be honest it's still refreshing to hear that they were prepared to get a tad niddled. Trouble is, of course, they lost.

Only the Sir Beefy Bothams of this world seem to be able to have a skinful before dawn and a hundred before lunch. Incidentally, your majesty, how long did that knighthood take? Greatest entertainer ever to put on a set of flannels!

What was the faff about? Oh yeah - one whiff of the old wacky backy and you quickly find yourself in knighthood purgatory.

Me, I'm delighted that Angel has bagged a big win. I identify entirely with the belly and the B&H: even the nickname 'The Duck' -that's the story of my season cricket-wise. (Yesterday's innings: Robson, caught behind 0 - flicked the bleeding pad, of course). Mr Cabrera'd be right welcome at the Blue Bell.

I've no objection if the mighty Woodsys and Federers keep raising the bar, just so long as the bar stays near enough for the Cabreras and the Robsons to get the next round in.

Doon your necks!

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comment by MrBlueBurns (U7545281)

posted Jun 18, 2007

I had a long day, a sports presentation night all evening and went to bed at 1am. I got up at 3 am to travel to London for a 6am start in the London to Brighton. Made it back in one piece, got home and then fell asleep during a penalty shoot out for the 2002 World Cup.

We don't all need a training regime and an early night.

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comment by El_Gordo (U8680401)

posted Jun 18, 2007

Robbo is right again!
I tell people I have the physique of a premiership footballer. Of course, that premiership footballer is Neville Southall, playing for Bradford against Leeds in 2000, but that still counts.

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comment by G K (U3836779)

posted Jun 18, 2007

Personally I aspire to the body of a gymnast:

http://www.bofunk.com/video/3228/fat_gymnast.html

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comment by CountDuckula1973 (U1873163)

posted Jun 18, 2007

Why do we give this coloum the time of day we dont see rants from southerners who think there funny. So of the things i have seen this biased biggoted northerner say is beyond belief the sooner we stop wasting money and time on things like this the better the BBC will become

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comment by dc_maestro_of_london (U6329343)

posted Jun 18, 2007

Nice one fat boy encourage the little fatties on fags good idea! You are an idiot.

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comment by G K (U3836779)

posted Jun 18, 2007

dc_maestro_of_london -

"Nice one fat boy encourage the little fatties on fags good idea! You are an idiot."

Here we see an example of the tragic effect of health-fascism on basic human faculties such as sense of humour, tolerance of others, and ability to relax.

Just say no, kids.

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comment by Peterb100 (U3919349)

posted Jun 18, 2007

Count Duckula - do you take everything in life so seriously.

Take things easy, get yourself a large drink, light a cigarette and relax.

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comment by walrusoflove (U2846401)

posted Jun 18, 2007

Count Duckula lighten up. Or preferably light-up, draw deeply and exhale luxuriously, ya big Southern Jessie!

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comment by Robbo Robson (U5722413)

posted Jun 18, 2007

comment by walrusoflove
posted 28 Minutes Ago

Count Duckula lighten up. Or preferably light-up, draw deeply and exhale luxuriously, ya big Southern Jessie!
-----------------------------------------

Thanks for doing me work for me, mate.

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comment by scrphil (U2978136)

posted Jun 20, 2007

Maybe he could be Angel of the North. That's somewhere near Robbo, isn't it ?

Do you remember Jack Newton the Aussie golfer. Pot belly, chain smoker and a first class hell-raiser. They don't make them like that any more.

As a southerener, can I say I enjoy your column but I am a bit envious. Cor blimey, strike a light guv - can I have a column too please ?

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