This is my eldest brother, Francis.

He's also the coolest one, which is why my parents sent him to military academy. Well, that, and the fact that he blew up a car. I don't see what the big deal is. It wasn't even our car.

"Military academy couldn't be better. My new roommate showed me how to kill mice with a hammer yesterday. I really think I'm starting to turn around." How cool does that sound?

He's got a real eye for the ladies. He ran away from school just so he could see this girl Beebee. He hid at the bottom of the garden, and I had to tell Dewey he was a sasquatch. And then he fell in love with Jody on my school picnic. It didn't last.

Francis' good advice

"I’m fine. There’s this, strange sense of peace that comes over you when you give up that last shred of dignity. It’s nice. "

Another Random Quote