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24 September 2014
I'm sorry I haven't a clue

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30th Special


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The Panellists- Graeme, Tim and Barry


The Internet's allowing a lot of people to play Mornington Crescent online. Is that how it should be played or do you need eye contact?

Barry: I would think eye contact myself.
Tim: I would think so. It's a bit like poker in that sense.
Graeme: If it's the only way that you can get to play then it's fine.
Interviewer: But it does bring a sort of international dimension to it.
Tim: It does. But if you can't see the other person you can't play absolutely properly. But as Graeme says, it doesn't stop you doing it. There could be a board game. It's not as good but it would be worth doing.

Now I'd like to ask you if you'll play a special round of Cheddar Gorge on the subject of Samantha. Tim, can you start?

Tim: I
Barry: was
Graeme: once
Tim: in
Barry: the
Graeme: BBC
T: looking
B: for
G: a
T: very
B: rare
G: but
T: strangely
B: intriguing
G: and
T: probably
B: hitherto
G: undiscovered
T: version
B: of
G: Samantha
T: but
B: I
G: found
T: that
B: she
G: was
T: not
B: to
G: be
T: seen
B: in
G: any
T: other
B: portion
G: of
T: the
G: except
T: once
B: I
G: went
T: to
B: the
G: smallest
T: room
B: in
G: the
B: and
G: there
T: I
B: saw
G: none
T: other
B: than
G: Samantha
T: and
B: her
G: very
T: close
B: intimate
G: friend
T: who
B: was
G: none
T: other
B: than
G: the
T: very
B: same
G: person
T: who
B: was
G: sitting
T: next
B: to
G: me
Graeme: Full stop.
Tim I think that's quite enough.
Barry: I think that paints the picture!

Can we talk quickly about your careers outside I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue? Barry, you've written for such comics as Kenny Everett...

Barry: ... I've written to a lot of famous comedians as well.
Interviewer: ..Morecambe and Wise..
Barry: Yes
Tim & Graeme: Woo-hoo!
Tim: What sort of noises do we have to make?
Barry: Can you do farm-yard noises? A day in the life of a farm-yard. Oh, and over there is James Cagney.
Interviewer: ...Kenny Everett, Morecambe and Wise, Bruce Forsythe, Tommy Cooper, Stanely Baxter, Dick Emery, Dave Allen, Frankie Howerd, Bob Hope, Jack Benny, Richard Pryor... Tim: ...Charles Dickens
Barry: ...Charles Dickens, Anthony Trollope - what a pain he was!

Tim, you've worked on Me And My Girl with Richard O'Sullivan and you also worked alongside Roland Rat..

Tim: I have. It was a great honour. I also worked alongside the original pastry girl, the three of us together. And Graeme and I wrote for Orson Welles. I used to write for Spike Milligan. You see, I liked Roland Rat. I thought he was good. The best thing the Director General did for the people at home.

Graeme, a scientific question for you: What happens exactly when Eric eats a banana?

Graeme: When Eric eats a banana, he turns into Bananaman, I'm afraid. Ask Tim - Tim was involved. He's not entirely innocent.
Tim: I was Eric and did eat that banana and I turned into Graeme who was Bananaman! Actually I saw one the other day; it was rather good.


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