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24 September 2014

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  Baldrick and friendMoney
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Blackadder owes the Bank of the black Monks of St. Herod one thousand pounds and if he doesn't repay it by Evensong the baby-eating Bishop of Bath and Wells will brutally murder him with the aid of a poker.

The boys try various money-making schemes, including putting Baldrick on the game. Sadly, all their efforts are in vain and by the end of the day Blackadder is still broke and facing certain death.

At the eleventh hour, he hatches a plan so cunning you could brush your teeth with it. He hires the finest portrait painter in England, Mr Leonardo Acropolis, to paint the Bishop in a hideously compromising position - with Percy. The blackmail is a huge success, although Percy seems less than thrilled with the whole thing.

quote Blackadder: The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the devil's own satanic herd.

quote Blackadder: This place stinks like a pair of armoured trousers after the Hundred Years War. Baldrick, have you been eating dung again?

quote Blackadder: Needs must when the devil vomits into your kettle.

quote Nursie: If you weren't quite so big, it would be time for Mr and Mrs Spank to pay a short sharp trip to Bottieland.

brush up
shakespeare Blackadder meets a mad beggar called "poor Tom" - an idea from King Lear, in which the mad beggar "poor Tom" is actually a sane nobleman called Edgar, in disguise.

In a moment of sadness, Percy solemnly says: "For God's sake, let us sit upon the carpet and tell sad stories...". This is a direct quote from Richard II.

Scholars of Elizabethan literature will of course know that the poker-up-the-bottom as a mode of execution was not invented by Messrs Curtis and Elton. Edward II was murdered in this disgusting way, and Christopher Marlowe wrote a play about it.

try a quiz Test Your Cunning Try the Blackadder series two quiz.

Baldrick's wisdom When people slip in what dogs have left in the streets, they do tend to say, 'Oops, I've trod in an Edmund.'

Insult of the episode Blackadder: The eyes are open, the mouth moves, but Mr Brain has long since departed, hasn't he, Perce?

Song lyrics
Song lyrics Take heed the moral of this tale,
Be not a borrower or lender,
And if your finances do fail,
Make sure your banker's not a bender

Blackadder, Blackadder,
He trusted in the Church,
Blackadder, Blackadder,
It left him in the lurch.

Blackadder, Blackadder,
His life was almost done.
Blackadder, Blackadder,
Who gives a toss? No-one!

«« Back Next »»
Blackadder Episode Guide
Series One Black Adder
The Foretelling
Born To Be King
The Archbishop
The Queen of Spain's Beard
Witchsmeller Pursuivant
The Black Seal

Series OneBlackadder II
Series One Blackadder the Third
Dish & Dishonesty
Ink & Incapability
Nob & Nobility
Sense & Senility
Amy & Amiability
Duel & Duality
Series four Blackadder Goes Forth
Captain Cook
Corporal Punishment
Major Star
Private Plane
General Hospital

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