"Imprisoned in my own body"
Gavin Solly weighs 32 stone and has not left his home in Dorset for eight years. With limited mobility and unable to support his family, he says he is desperate for a gastric bypass operation to improve his life.
The NHS have agreed to pay for the procedure, but he has been told that his health is not up to it. Below you can watch a video about Gavin's life and his battle to get gastric bypass surgery.
In order to see this content you need to have both Javascript enabled and Flash installed. Visit BBC Webwise for full instructions. If you're reading via RSS, you'll need to visit the blog to access this content.
~RS~q~RS~~RS~z~RS~18~RS~)
Comments
If his health isn't up to it - it isn't up to it. Durrr!
Complain about this comment
I don't understand why this is your main topic? It's of limited interest surely? Also - didn't you have a similar story up for discussion a few weeks back? Whether this op should be available on the National Health or not?
Complain about this comment
Its the new format, this hour has become either some emotional indulgence or a freak show.
Complain about this comment
There are a few empty crisp packets about in the film....
Complain about this comment
I understand completely how he feels imprisoned in his home. I have had even worse things happen to my spine and cannot walk, sit etc. and have to spend most of my days in bed lying flat.
I too have gained about 1 stone a year. I am not anywhere near his weight but I do understand that it is possible. It could even be due to medication etc.
He must have been heavy before he hurt his back.
I understand how he feels about being inside. I don't need any gastric band but I understand how it is very depressing to gain weight for no apparent reason and because of the pain, not be able to exercise to get some of it off.
Just my .02
Suzan
Complain about this comment
Even if he can't exercise, a calorie controlled diet would enable him to lose weight. His excuses are pathetic.
Complain about this comment
99% of people gain weight for a reason Suzan and that is because they eat too much and exercise too little. If this guy knows he has a weight problem and cannot exercise he MUST cut his calorie intake, there is no other way of doing it.
Complain about this comment
fantastic emails you have just read out Victoria!
Complain about this comment
I have mixed feelings about this subject.
I suffer from a sever degenerative spinal problem which has made movement difficult for years but I have not used this as an excuse to put on weight and have nt (if you do less you eat less not more)or become bed ridden however I do feel that if this chap has kept his part of the bargain he should get his operation as promised.
I do feel strongly that it is a finacially based decision as Dorset trust are not good at paying for out of area care.
In my own case I was told nothing could be done no surgeon would touch me and to accept that I would end up in a wheelchair I was not prepared to accept this at 51 so started to look around for someone who would help.
Luckily we had private health insurance and I found a wonderful surgeon Mr Khai Lam at Guys Hospital in London who in Jan 08 put 2 replacement discs and a fusion in my neck and in October 09 rebuilt my spine from T10-S1 I am extremely delicate and recovering from this but I am sure it will give me my mobility back.
I have been extremely lucky but the laughable fact was that at the same time I was told no one would touch me Mr Lam was seconded to Bournemouth hospital part time (as the local spinal surgeon had retired)so in essence I could have been reffered to him in the first place but obviously the Trust did nt want to spend the money letting me have the surgery out of area at Guys despite the fact the government insists you can chose you surgeon and hospital
I can never thank Mr Lam or Aviva health insurance enough for giving me a chance.
I hope Gavin is given a chance by at least getting his weight down and improving his chance of spinal surgery to improve his mobility
Mimbees
Complain about this comment
What is the point of trying to get our country's carbon foot print lower when the British establishment sabotage any of our efforts.
We produce 600 million tons of CO2, 9 tons per person.
Our heating a lighting consumption amounts to 27% of our energy usage 10% of that is lighting, energy saving bulbs save 90%. So saving us 14.5 million tons of CO2.
Meantime the Government has added 2 million people to our population, adding some 18million tons of CO2 to our total.
We might as well not bothered.
Complain about this comment
So - I have listened to two callers saying that, really, they don't eat all that much and yet they want a Gastric Bypass. The bypass restricts the amount of food you can eat. The callers have said that they don't over-eat - so, why do they need that restriction. Hmmmm?
People's perceptions of what is 'not much food' varies enormously. Perhaps their idea of 'not much' is really quite a bit and very high in calories.
Calories in vrs calories out. If you are idle you will be burning even less.
I know a lady who has just lost 10 stone in a liquid diet. She couldn't have the surgery due to a heart condition. It was lose weight or die. She lost the weight.
Complain about this comment
And if the freak show isn't bad enough we are now treated to a pop revue, as if there aren't enough music channels to choose from.
Complain about this comment
Hello This is Gavin Solly.......first of all im not looking for any kind of pitty i told my story honest i was in bed because of a accident not for over eating lets make that very clear to start with.
To answer the person who says there were crisp packs in the film first of all i never eat crisps there is no picture of crisps packets in my bedroom.
I never ever asked for help i could not help having a accident.... I worked in a hospital had the accident was sent home..... no treatment was given....was told to call my Dr out which I did was told to rest 8 weeks .....I layed in bed in pain could not move ..I told Dr I could not sit to much pain..it took them 3 months to get me appointment in the hospital i worked in to tell me I damaged disk four and five in my back.again was sent home..still i could not sit the pain was so bad..... i moaned and complained to my Dr..then 18 mouths later they took me into have a MI scan to find my tail bone was broken in half 18 months would you like to have a broken bone at the end of your spin....then they removed the bone...they sent me home never even checked if the surgery was done right.
Again I could sit had to lay down......I asked Dr For help i was promised a pain clinic...to be taken to local swimming pool and gym any thing to get me out of bed it never happened so please do not tell me i did not try to help myself i was let down by my Dr.
Even the funding we got was got by my wife and my self writing letters after letters waiting for replys which took weeks.
Now another thing I must point out Diet..when I was working I was 20 stone not 24 stone if you look in picture in film you see a picture of me before accident....Do i look fat at 20 stone no.
I've put on a stone for every year i've been in bed thats not alot if i was over eating it would be alot more than just a stone....if you can not excercise you dont burn cals.....even if on a diet.
You people who put me down really need to go and get educated about my case before judging people like myself..if i had got the right treatment in the first place for my disks and my tail bone i would not be where I am today.....yes there alot worse people out there then myself.....but let me make this clear i want to get well im helping myself to get better not asking for help from the public....but my reason for going five live was to share my story to others out there..who being let down by the system.
If you wish me to answer any questions I will be happy to answer but if your going to insult me dont bother.
I would like to thank Five Live
Best Regards
Gavin Solly
P.S sorry about gramma
Complain about this comment
I had a bowel cancer op in January. I was promised a follow-up op after my chemo ended in Aug. My surgeon followed me up twice and on 28th Aug promised my op before Xmas. hen I received no appt by end of Nov I rang the hospital and managed to speak to him personally. You could tell from his appology that he was disapointed that my op could not be done and would not be done until sometime in 2010. The reason was that his operating lists had been cut back by the bureaucrats. The NHS is just like any other multiple departmental organisation, they are all fighting for their share of the budget. Why can't there be one "good-like" person who dictates that the NHS budget should be used in some sort of priority order, treating the serious cases as priority and moving the likes of obesity treatments, IVF and other non critical issues to the bottom. If there is enough money they will get treated and if not they will wait. Why should cancer sufferers be delayed and in some cases refused life enhancing drugs.
Complain about this comment
I have to agree with "Half an Acre" above.
Weight gain / weight loss is not magic. In the laws of physics energy in = energy out you cannot create or destroy it, therefore if you dont burn off the amount of calories you take in you will get bigger
Eat 2000 kcal, burn off 1500 - 500 left over. Eat 2000 kcal, burn off 2500 - 500 lost.
Everybody will lose weight if you burn more than you consume.
Complain about this comment
This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.
Bariatric surgery has amazing outcomes for patients with morbid obesity, however it is not the "easy option" people think it is! There are two reasons why a medical team require people to show an initail weight loss before the procedure can be done.
1. Any surgery carries a risk of death, especially to those people who are at cardiovascular risk surch as those suffering obesity. Many people are required to lose weight before any type of surgical procedure is undertaken.
2. Once a gastric band or bypass is undertaken the patient will have to stick to a very strict diet, their food intake will be limited and must be well balanced. If a patient can't prove they can follow this diet they are at risk of causing further damage to themselves if they continue a unhealthy lifestyle.
My point is that bariatric surgery is very successful when the patient can comply to a strict diet. The surgery does not make you thin over night, it often takes at least one year and it's a difficult thing to get used to. The NHS do not want to restrict the surgery to save money, this surgery can actually save NHS money.
The listeners that have been denied this surgery will have been given support to lose weight in order to be eligible for the procedure. When it is denied it is because they are unable to make the lifestyle changes required. Losing weight is no doubt incredibly difficult but it is more than acheivable to lose the small amount required if the patient really wants to.
Complain about this comment
I really sympathise with Gavin's situation and hope he does manage to get his operation eventually, but i can't help feeling that there's a real confusion about the benefits that a gastric band will bring to someone who has a "genetic" propensity to gain weight, or indeed Gavin who says he already has a healthy diet.
Complain about this comment
I've traveled extensively and you don't see any obese people in countries such as Ethiopia and Nepal. A friend of mine had a trampoline accident and she was 6 months in a bed brace unable to move for 6 months, but did not put on wieght. Why, because she didn't overeat. It's all about calorie intake. Exercise will speed up the process and enable you to eat more but at the end of the day your body will store as fat calories which are not consumed as energy, so the solution is take less fuel on board.
I feel that the answer for Gavin and others in his position is more psychological than medical. It's the opposite position of an annorexic in the mind's perception of the situation. What is a small portion of food for one person can be perseved as a glutinous portion for someone else. It doesn't really come down to eating chicken instead of pizza if you are eating too much chicken.
NHS Trusts don't have enough money for chemo drugs so the gastric band operation has to be looked at in that context. I would suggest that Gavin would be better off with some sessions with a psycologist/psychiatrist rather than with a surgeon.
Complain about this comment
After reading Gavin's additional comments it seems to me there are two issues here.
1) The first is the weight issue and
2) the second is the shambolic NHS.
I have to agree with other comments, at the end of the day:
Energy in > Energy out = Weight gain
and sadly if the day is spent lying down the bodies energy requirements will be severly reduced.
Gavin's experience of the NHS sounds horrendous and I can't believe the apparent shambles in the system, Actually maybe I can based on others experiences mentioned here.......
Complain about this comment
whereas I sympathise with Gavins predicament, he *does* look overweight in the photo taken before his accident.
a quick glance at the WHO's BMI chart confirms that at 20st he would have been clinically obese even if he was 6'8" tall.
prevention, as ever, is better than a cure...
Complain about this comment
I think it's quite clear that Gavin is unable to get regular exercise due to injury and this is the problem. It sounds to me as though Gavin has been given a lot of false hope and subsequently the specialists have moved the goal posts. This is unacceptable. The doctor and specialists need to work with Gavin to create a plan of action bearing in mind his injuries in order that he can work towards the surgery he requires.
On a separate note, in response to the initial comments about the issue of overeating, if we argue that those who eat more should eat less, then should we not similarly treat anorexia by telling sufferers to simply eat more? Or tell Bulimics to stop throwing up? This is an incredibly naive approach to obesity. I think there are significant inconsistencies surrounding the issue of overeating when it is, essentially an eating disorder and should be treated with the same level of urgency and importance as any other.
Complain about this comment
The treatment for this condition costs in the region of £30,000. We as a country cannot afford this extraordinary increase of people asking for them. This is not government money, it's taxpayers hard earned money, in a social pot to benefit all (some more than others, it seems!)
I couldn't listen to all the programme and the questions may have been answered. But one thing I am confused about Mr Solly, is why you didn't push the NHS for the gym and swimming and no doubt dietary help, then, as hard as you are pushing for the gastric band operation now?
Where the funding is coming from? Are you self funded, if so in that case it's none of our business? You say that you wrote letters and you say "I'm helping myself to get better not asking from help from the public". Well you are asking for help, if it is NHS treatment.
I can understand for a couple of years it must have been difficult to deal with your accident, but I cannot understand how anyone goes for many years without dealing with it. Eventually when the head comes out of the sand it presents the taxpayer with a huge bill!
Mr Solly, I do wonder whether the internet time you have spent in the last ten years included educating yourself about food nutrition. It didn't seem so.
There are circumstances where of course expensive treatment is necessary. Some medication and medical conditions do make you put on weight I know. I'm not saying in some circumstances it isn't a necessary operation, just that many do use it because they don't want to put in the years and effort it takes to get the weight off.
The woman that called saying "you don't realise it just creeps up on you" well, it just doesn't!! Your clothes get tight derrr!
Complain about this comment
may I point out I did not take this out for a easy way out to lose weight...i've had to think about this for along time.....as i pointed out if i had the help from my work place where i had my accident which was a hospital i was a night porter...plus the help of my Dr I would not be where I am now I was punished for having a accident did not get the treatment 8 years ago.
When you cant move your legs or your back how can you exercise the pain is to much.....I will say this again yes you can loose weight and diet......but in my case i couild only lay in bed not my choice believe me but as many with spine damage as i have to can not exercise...so if you diet .diet means eat healthy food you still not going to burn the cals.
Like I said dont judge people untill you have the full facts I am where i am because of the system there many worse out there then myself I know that fact.........again i telling my story so others can learn from it what ever illness it is....I will not give up i want my life back thats what im fighting for if im wrong for fighting to live .what a sad world we live in .
Thank you for those who have took the time to write here and encourge me to go on.
The people who sit here and give negtive thoughts need to hope it never happens to them and family members
Complain about this comment
Sorry Gavin but the ONLY reason you are overweight is that you eat too much. Don't blame your inability to exercise, how many obese paraplegics do you see in wheel chairs??
How did you loose the 3 stone earlier in the year?? Why did you stop the routine that enabled you to loose that weight?? Just because you reached the 3 stone target why did you stop??
Complain about this comment
i did not stop im still going.....yes there many in wheelchairs but you dont seem to understand i can not sit...where they removed tail bone its to painful.....any way i will not read qanymore of this be insulted im just sharing my story.....i've asked nothing of any one just sharing what i've been through i really hope your happy in you comments.......as for the person who goes on about tax payers i've worked all my life i paid my taxes and stamPs.
aT LEAST IM MAN ENOUGH TO ANSWER YOU QUESTION
Complain about this comment
Gavin is a man with a heart made of gold,
he came on five live so his story could be told,
some people r kind, understanding his poor health,
others just plain nasty and should keep there thoughts to thereself.
a husband a dad and a grandad he wants to be once again,
hes fedup of being trapped in this body of pain.
lets help Gavin out with all the support he will need,
so that from this body of his he can be freed.
and to all you people out there,
with only negative thoughts to share
its sad to think of u dying some day sad and all alone,
who wants to be with someone with a heart made of stone!
Em and kelly
xxxxx
Complain about this comment
Why ask a question if you have already reached a conclusion Paul King?
Complain about this comment
How I detest poor spelling, grammar and the dreaded text shorthand so well illustrated on this blog.
In a generation there won't be a person left who will be able communicate by the written word.
Complain about this comment
This man will die prematurely unless he has the surgery.
He should , without question , have access to it.
The results of this surgery are excellent and well validated.
None of us have the right to choose who should recieve life saving treatment and who should not.
Perhaps the next motorist who looses control of his/her car and crashes should only be treated if he/she agrees to foot the bill?
GL
Complain about this comment
Well done Carrie. I wondered how long it would be before the grammer & spelling police hove into view, with nothing better to say other than where an apostrophe should be. Perhaps we should be using the spelling & grammer of Shakespere's time or go back to Norman times. When do your spelling and grammer laws commence from?
The important thing is communication and I would argue that there isn't a single post on here that can't be understood, so do us a favour and stop talking down to people.
Complain about this comment
Pleasure, Jeff.
I would dispute your assertion that all the posts on here can be understood, however.
You illustrate my point so, so well.
Complain about this comment
Perhaps there should be a seperate topic on grammar?
Is there no sanction for going off topic?
Clearly the relevance of grammar to this debate in zero.
GL
Complain about this comment
Complain if you would like. I am just reacting to the way some people post. Plenty of written posts are not really anything to do with the original blog. I am not racist or sexist, anti fat people, someone who laughs at misfortune or anti any religion. Just making a simple point. I have stopped listening and I can just as easily stop posting, just making the point that if you can't spell a word like separate, it is a shame.
Complain about this comment
Nash. Couldn't agree more even though I am one of the perpetrators for which I apologise. Poor old Gavin comes on Radio 5 looking for some sympathy and advice and the best that some people can do is "Tut tut" over the way that everyone conjugates their verbs.
If Victoria's producers are reading this blog then it may be a good topic for a future programme, asking whether we should turn the grammatical clock back to the 1950's which seems to be the time which most grammer snobs believe that the Queens English began, or to the Shakesperean language of 1616, or to even further back than that, to when the cavemen uttered their first "Ugg", or should we allow grammer and spelling to continue to organically grow, change and expand as it has done since the beginning of time.
Apologies to Gavin for hijacking and changing the subject and to those who may be thumbing through their English language textbooks and dictionaries as we speak in order to correct all of my numerous mistakes in this post.
Complain about this comment
Fat People thats about right......shows what a very good eduction you had grow up carrie.
Shame you got nothing better to do than make remarks about others take a real hard look at yourself.
Time Waster
Complain about this comment
I apologise for using the word "fat". However as you have no idea about any of my circumstances, whilst letting us see a bit too much of yours, please don't judge.
Complain about this comment
Well Carrie i'm not going to come down to your level..........im here to share whats going on in my life so others can learn from what im going through.......not here looking for pitty as most think.
Now as you say don't judge me ...is that not what your doing by the statements your making on here is it not you judgeing others.
IF you have a s story to share with us all this is where you can share it i will surly listen to you?.
This today been the hardest thing i've had to share people can be very mean don't think before speaking and believe it or not i'm a very private person..........all i've had all day from most not all is i am how i am because they think i over eat.....why now after 8 years shut away in my bedroom is because i put my trust in the system was let down very badly...im told by people on here to diet...eat healthy they judge me with out even klnowing the story of a accident i had ....that put me in bed oh no its what he eats....Crap....I asked for help years ago i was made promise my hopes built up then crust time after time..but still i kept up beat I wikll not give up no matter how many people put me down.
Carrie yes my grammer is very bad but i try my best to express my self the best i can
Complain about this comment
This is the end of our bit of conversation Gavin. Best of luck.
With all the mistreatment and the system letting you down, perhaps you should consider suing your local NHS Trust. If they have been as incompetent and feeble as you suggest there is definitely a basis for you to bring a case against them. There are plenty of people who can help you decide about such a move.
Complain about this comment
Carrie..... how bout u get a life dis page should b used 4 ppl suportin cases like Gavins, not for slagin of ppl who care nuff said !
Complain about this comment
I can see this page is in good hands, emma.
However I would just like to point out that there are many critical posts of Gavin on this page, and that I have attempted to make some amends which you have posted after that.
Complain about this comment
I'd suggest that sueing the NHS Trust isn't going to get anyone anywhere whether it's justified or not. The only thing that would achieve would be to deprive the already cash strapped Trust of much needed funds. Unfortunately it's a fact of life that the NHS isn't a bottomless pit of money and it's equally alarming and disappointing that many people with life threatening conditions have their operations delayed at the eleventh hour or even worse, cancelled.
Having said that I still feel that Gavin should try to approach this problem from a different angle before surgery is considered as an option and get some pyschological assistance. That's not a judgement on his character, but he may find that a psychologist may be able to help him regarding his relationship with food and start him on the road to having more control over it. Obviously exercise is out of the question, but you've got to start somewhere and so getting some help to control calorific intake could be a useful starting point as that is exactly what the gastric band would do mechanically. I'm suggesting that the same thing is done mentally. It's obviously going to be a hard road, but what is the alternative? The Gastric Band is being seen as a 'magic bullet', but perhaps the same outcome can be achieved by other means. Whatever happens, fighting the NHS isn't going to help Gavin or anyone else in my view.
Good luck to you Gavin, I'd just ask you to explore every option before you try for the surgery. Getting the mental side sorted seems to work for people suffering with anorexia, which although exactly the opposite of your condition, is, I would suggest the same problem.
Complain about this comment
Gavin, I wasn't (in comment 25) saying you should be in a wheel chair, I was making the point that people need not be obese because of their inability to move or exercise.
I'm sorry but I can't see how you can blame all and sundry for your predicament when it's you who has eaten more than you should. No one else has made you eat more than your body needs and as others have said the excess intake is stored as fat. It's a scientific fact.
You need to fill in a food diary for a couple of weeks where you (or your wife) record every thing you eat and then let a dietician give you the diet advice you so obviously need.
I wish you luck.
Complain about this comment
Well how very decent of you Carrie. you should, however, of had nothing to make an amends for. But well done any way.
As for Mr Paul Kings last comment, do you really think the things you suggested have not been tried? His only opption is to have the gastric band operation. He is not in need of your dietary addvice. That, after all, is not what this blog is all about.
P.S. Look at that carrie, full stops, capital letters, the full works !!!!!
Complain about this comment
Gavin, shame you didn't answer my questions on no23.
Yes we pay taxes, but have your taxes covered the costs of the surgery - I think you said you had 5 children and twelve grandchildren. Do you know it costs £7000 per year per child to state educate.
It's just no good anymore people saying they pay their taxes - most people probably don't put in anything like they and their children actually take out. We have to start realising this and take responsibility for our lifestyle choices.
I just wish you would at least answer my very valid question of why you didn't push the NHS for the gym and swimming and no doubt dietary help, then, as hard as you are pushing for the gastric band operation now?
I can do nothing than remain suspicious of your agenda until I understand why you weren't as active to PREVENT your situation getting worse.
Complain about this comment
Jeff i'm going to say this just the once okay .stop looking down your nose at me ...i had a very good life before my accident i was a lovin father i worked hard to provide for my family......now you keep going on about the NHS i worked for the trust for 10 years......I tell you this i seen so much going on in the hospital it make your hair curl the things they hide from the public .......the money they waste on making the building or gardens look nice money they waste on making the hospital look good.
You stand there go on about money i bet you got money never had to work hard in your life well i've worked for every penny since i left school and paid taxes as you say.......OH I'M DARN SURE IF YOU OR ONE OF YOUR FAMILY WERE FIGHTING FOR LIFE YOU TAKE WHAT HELP YOU COULD SO DONT JEFF SIT THERE WRITING THE TRASH THATS COMES OUT OF YOUR MOUTH........BUT YOU NEED A WAKE UP CALL NOT ALL HAVE MONEY ANY PEOPLE NEED HELP....YES IM MAD BECAUJSE ALL I'VE DONE TODAY IS LISTEN TO PEOPLE RUN ME DOWN .....ITS PEOPLE LIKE YOU THAT MAKE ME SO ANGREY PLEASE DONT BOTHER WRITING BACK I'VE HEARD ENOUGH OF YOU JUDGEMENT I DONT NEED YOUR ADVICE OR HAVE I ASKED FOR IT..I WISH YOU A GOOD EVENING.
Complain about this comment
Hello cassandra,
Sorry i did not answer your question straight away.
To answer your question when my Dr put me on bed rest i was left weeks with out help...remember now this is after 18 months with a broken bone at the bottom of my spine.......but i guess in your eyes that was my fault i had a accident ....I put my trust in my Dr and the place of work which was the hospital...i asked for help every week the Dr told me he would get me into a pain clinic i waited nothing happened then i asked about swimming and going to a gym.again he said yes he look into it again nothing happened only help i got from my GP was a pain imjection into my spine...that was it so i thought ok i'll have to help myself i saved for a out door swimming pool.........but as i've told you the pain was really bad my oldest boys use to carry me out to the pool left me into the pool yes it helped me but in winter no it was a put up pool not a built in one before you say oh can afford a swimming pool.....so there your answer to that question so i asked for help never got it.
Yes i have five kids let me tell you every one of them work and not livin of the state as you were aplying my family meaning my kids and grand kids are none of your business are they???
Diet I have seen sol many diet people over the 8 years its unbelievable they say eat this eat that....yes i lost 3 stone since jan i'm still dieting to loose more i sday this if i could loose the weight not to have this op i would..but i have to get rid of the weight to fix my back problems which should have been done after my accident....all im hearing is what about people who are in wheelchairs oh how i wish i could get in one atleast i could get out of her go out with family.
So don't ever think i've not tried to help myself ......i'm not feeling sorry for myself and again im not here to moan asbout me im sharing my story to help others like myself and lot of people who spoken to me today no nothing about mine and others problems we shut our self away from the looks people give the mean comments people make we are human and we do have feeling like everyone else......if you or your family had someone who needed help im sure you would do what ever it takes to get them well right?
good evening to every one
Complain about this comment
I totally understand what Gavin is going through.
10 years ago I broke my back in a work related accident.
A lot has happened in those 10 years. I've not worked since, due to constant pain. Previously, I'd never been out of work since I was 16, apart from half a day. I'm 53 now. I worked two jobs for a while to put myself through a years college.
Like Gavin, I've put weight on. I'm on diet pills, which even the doctor doesn't think will work, but it's something, to quote my doctor, 'You have to do before they will give you the operation'. I too am waiting for a gastric band op.
Speaking for myself, after my accident, the first thing on my mind wasn't exactly keeping my weight down. What was on my mind was the pain, the total change in circumstance, how to face a future totally different to the one i expected, how to cope with watching my wife leave for work at 6:30 in the morning and not return till after 9 at night and know there was nothing I could do to help. When she came home, she had to cook and look after me as i couldn't do anything for myself for a while.
After that, we both went into periods of depression, not surprising we were told by the doctor. My wife pulled herself round after a couple of years, I'm still taking the tablets 9 years later. I'm told the best cure for depression is a total change in circumstance. Thats really helped.
I paid in to a medical insurance scheme. If you're in South Yorkshire, you might recognise it, it's called the Westfield. I tried to claim, and was told I couldn't, there was nothing to cover my situation. If I lost the tip of a finger I could claim, but a broken back, no, sorry. Am I bitter? Well, wouldn't you be?
Later on I was called to a panel of users to discuss The Westfield scheme. I told them my story, and they were amazed I wasn't able to claim. They would look into it. They then altered the scheme so I thought I could claim. Long story made short, I tried and was passed on to an insurance company who told me reason I wasn't able to claim wasn't due to not being able to work due to an injury from the accident, but was due to my weight and a leg ulcer that had been cleared by then, both of which happened because I was no longer physically mobile. Am I bitter? Well yes, in the same situation, I think you'd be.
So now, 10 years after the accident, what's my life like? I have a great wife, and 2 wonderful children, the first of which was though the help of the assisted conception unit. The second one might as well have been, as without the earlier help it wouldn't have been possible. Part of my problem is any repetitive movement of my lower spine causes intense pain. I could spell it out more graphically, but I hope you get it from that description.
So yes, I get on with my life. Would I change it? Well, not at the moment to be honest. I have had the joy of seeing my children grow, though how I cope in the new year when my wife goes back to work after her maternity leave ends, I don't know. My mother in law has recently moved cities to be close to help, so that will be good.
So, I understand what Gavin is going through. I wish him well, and hope people understand that after a life changing accident, your weight isn't th first thing on your mind. As my wife said today, 'You lost so much of your life after the accident, food was one thing you could still enjoy'. I don't eat more, I eat what I always have, and that is the problem, as I'm not active enough to work that off.
Everyone's position is different. Gavin, you're a brave man for putting yourself out there, as some people love to paint everyone with the same big brush without understanding that everyone's problems are different.
So eat less and you'll loose weight, it's true you will, but there are a lot of reasons why for some of us it's not that easy. For those who can, then good for you, I envy you, for the rest of us........
Thanks for reading, and please consider what I've said before you reply.
Complain about this comment
Dave.I thank you for your imput I thank you for explaning how we feel inside the emotions and stress it puts on a relationship....but like you my wife carried on working we had no choice bills still had to be paid...being the man it hurt not beable to help the wiofe not once did she moan all she say if it was her i'd do the same.
Dave you made my night i've shed a few tears today one thing i do not do is cry in front of people i cry in private which im sure you have done aswell...........Like yourself and so many other in this country who dammage there backs do not understand the pain which goes with it not being able to move your legs or sit up as the back wont let you....I did not know there was so many people out there who have no understanding can be very mean with out thinking.......but i've tried to make them understand its no life shut away in a room for 8 years ...to be told by perople on here not to eat its your own fauilt you been imn bed 8 years its a sad world when all people can say why should you get the oparation...yes you can loose weight if you dont eat.all i've had all day its what you put in your mouth.
Dave may I ask what you weight at this time......dont answer if you dont wish too.
Yes like you i feel bitter...i feel im being punished for doing my job and the accident was not my fault my boss back then said yes gavin your job is safe.ui trusted them after 20 mouths turned up on my door step told me they where termanating my contract because i would not work again .again i trusted them god it hurt so i went to unision to sue the hospital i was told i had left the claim to long.but as life is you trust them they tgreat you as a number i got nothing so yes im bitter very bitter again i was being punished for doing my job.
Dave thank you for listening tell my storie i will be here i hope in the future we can talk more and never know help each other.
Well done for being brave and voice yourself on here.
Best Regards Dave habg in there
Complain about this comment
Gavin,
The problem with posts on blogs is that they can be misunderstood. I'm certainly not looking down my nose at anyone, with the exception of the grammer and spelling police perhaps.
If you re-read my post you'll see that my suggestion (and it is only a suggestion) is that you go about this from a different angle. Weight gain is due to calories in - energy out, I think most would agree. As you are immobile then obviously you'll be burning less calories than before your accident. Therefore you need to consume fewer calories as you are now inactive. You'll need to consume even less than that to reduce your current weight. Now of course that's easier said than done as thousands of dieters will testify. Unfortunately most diets or fad diets as they are often refered to rarely work in the long term. My suggestion is that you approach your problem from a different perspective, in the same way that an anorexic has to eventualy. You can't force feed anyone with anorexia, they'll find a way to get rid of the calories to maintain their low bodyweight, usually by vomiting. Therefore the only successful treatment for people with this condition is to tackle their mindset. I'm suggesting that this could be the answer for you, but obviously in reverse as you need to consume fewer calories. Somehow your mindset has to change just as the anorexics does. Now I won't pretend to know how you go about this, but your GP may be able to recommend a clinical psychologist who may be able to help. That's all I'm trying to say. If you haven't gone down this road then maybe it's worth a try.
Regarding your comments regarding the NHS, the point I'm making here is that the NHS isn't a bottomless pit and some poor sod has to make the decisions as to where that money is spent as it is finite. I'm well aware that a lot of money is wasted in large organisations like the NHS, but unfortunately that doesn't make it any easier for those in the Trust in allocating it. I certainly wouldn't like to be that person. As you are aware the hospital that you worked at is in a bit of a hole financialy itself at thje moment so money cannot be allocated for everything. I don't like it anymore than you do. If that sounds smug or 'I'm alright jack' well I've undergone 7 operations for primary and secondary cancer over the last 4 years, so I have some understanding of the way things work and like you I've paid into 'the system' all of my life, worked all of my life and never drawn benefits, so your impression of my lifestyle is incorrect, not that it's relevant or really matters to me.
Finally, I guess it's understandable that you are upset at some of the comments on here, on the radio and in the Dorset Echo, but it should be remembered that you are the one who put his head over the parapit, so in that respect you should be able to take the support, advice and critisim. If you didn't want it, then you shouldn't have 'gone public'.
I sincerely hope that it all works out and that you'll move forward. You lost 3 stone before, maybe you could do it again and taking proffesional advice could be the answer. Small chunks is the best way to go, so don't set your sights on losing a large amount in one go such as 10 stone. Try setting lower targets of 1 or 2 stone at a time and then set a new target. Again just a small suggestion. Let's face it, if it's in any doubt that you won't get the gastric band then it wouldn't hurt to have a 'Plan B'. The NHS can't pay for everthing as much as we'd all like it to.
49 comments on here so far, so quite a lot for you to think about.
Complain about this comment
Hi Gavin, I was on the program today, I'm the surgeon that had a lap band. I wrote about my weight loss story in my blog “Obesity to Triathlons” at http://christopheroliver.blogspot.com/ I was also featured by the BBC in their "Scrubbing Up" column see “Time to get tougher on obesity? “ http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8279577.stm Do not let any of the harsh comments get at you, it’s inevitable when you go to the media. Best wishes and good luck! Mr Chris Oliver. Consultant Orthopaedic Surgeon, Edinburgh Royal infirmary.
Complain about this comment
Hi Gavin.
Thanks for what you put. I would love to keep in touch, but don't want to put my email address or Facebook info on here for obvious reasons. If you can work out some way of doing that, it would be great, maybe through the BBC, not sure.
Tuesday I spend at my parents. They're in their late 70's but as our two are the first babies in the family for 40 years, they're making the most of the children while they can.
My last weight check that was reliable was a few months ago. It was 24 stone then. That was during the last visit I had to the hospital.
I stopped doing physio because they found it was making my back problems worse.
I can still get about, but after walking maybe 100 yards, the pain is debilitating. Looking after c the children in an interesting experience. Life seems a series of obstacles to be overcome. I spend a lot of time on the internet, before the children came along, it was my lifeline.
Not sure what else to say.
Thanks for being so open Gavin. It was a brave thing to do. As you say, people comment without thinking. Life can deal out some rubbish sometimes.
Cheers,
Dave
Complain about this comment
Gavin - all operations carry some risk - and the result of the gastric banding is that you end up eating less. It still hursts to eat much less than sustains your body - all that happens with a gastric band is that you can NOT eat enough to stop that hurt.
So why not try a meal replacement diet - eg lipotrim - which gives you those fewer calories whilst giving a sense of "fullness" and no real hunger - but 425 calories a day - and a sustained HEALTHy weight loss without surgery. You could expect to lose half a stone to a stone a month.
The difficulty will come when you're up and about and COULD then choose food for yourself.
Complain about this comment
Gavin - I posted an idea - an idea that has to be medically supervised - but DOES work, a few days ago - did you see my post?
Complain about this comment
Just read that the 'fattest man in England' from Ipswich has cost the taxpaying public ONE MILLION POUNDS.......... so far!!!!
I nearly fell off my chair, that's serious money. This consists of medical costs, home help, and of course benefits. If only someone had intervened in his 'rights' earlier and stopped him ballooning to an extraordinary size.
But, then again, as I suppose he'll say, I paid my taxes. (roll eyes)
Complain about this comment
View these comments in RSS