"She chose me over the baby"
Have you ever been in a relationship where you and your other half disagreed vehemently about having children?
We spoke to Ashley this morning. He didn't want children and when his partner had an unplanned pregnancy she gave the baby up for adoption.
In his words, she chose "me over the baby".
They've now split up and he spoke movingly about the effect the decision had on him. You can hear the interview below.
======== UPDATE: FRIDAY 14 NOVEMBER ========
Today we spoke to Ashley's ex-girlfriend, Victoria. You can hear the interview here:
© MMIX~RS~q~RS~~RS~z~RS~26~RS~)
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Listening to Ashley and his frequent declarations of love for his girlfriend, my conclusion is that he is very possessive of her and was terrified that he'd have to share her love with their baby.
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Victoria, you ask listeners for thier opinion about your show and it was heavily suggested less dumbing down and in particular less baby talk.......two blogs and about three shows later and we are being served up yet more dumbed down Jeremy Kyle/This Morning esq rubbish in the form of yet another guest on to tell us all about his experiences with babies and relationships, followed up of course with a baby and relationship related blog.
Why ask, when you don't listen?
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Hi Arab
Thanks for your view. Most listeners who got in touch with the programme yesterday engaged enthusiastically with Ashley's story. They listened carefully - some had similar (ish) experiences, many related to what he said and others couldn't comprehend his actions.
Perhaps if we altered an approach because of two blog postings, the majority of listeners might have something to say?
What did you think about the other 2.5 hours of the programme? The report on rising jobless figures, the package from Parc Prison in Bridgend, the report from Leeds Crown Court on the beginning of the Karen Matthews trail, the latest from Jersey on the children's home, the reports from Derby on the shooting of the 15 yr old, the phone-in at 9 on child protection..
thanks
Victoria
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Hello Victoria
Your posting confuses me a little. I was complaining about 5live dumbing down too much and having too many child and relationship related items. You respond as if you disagree but then highlight the fact that apart from the blog related relationship/baby topic the other 2 and half hours of your show included two other child related items and a child related phone in
You also tried to suggest that you have only ever recieved 2 blogs complaining about 5lives dumbed down approach and its idiotic plans to dumb down further by axing the midday news.... Only two blogs.... No e-mails? No phone calls? Ever? REALLY??
The part I find most confusiing is when you point out that most of the listeners that got in touch engaged with Ashleys story. This isn't suprising is it as they got in touch with you about it? What I think is more important surely is..
How many listners did not engage in Ashleys story?
How many listener did not get in touch?
How many listeners thought 'I can watch This Morning/GMTV, listen to a commercial radio phone in or read hello magazine if I want to here about this sort of stuff so why are 5live covering it'?
I would suggest the vast majority, I mean not exactly been a particularly popular blog now has it!
Sort it out Victoria FFS or all you will be left with are listeners who only want to hear about relationships, children, soap operas, reality TV shows and the goings on of celebrities and then you will have as much credibility as Hello magazine or a tabloid newpaper........you are already 4/5ths of the way there and I think unless your new crazy midday news-less schedule isn't changed you will be all the way there, fully dumbed down atlast.
Cheers
Arab
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hello again Arab
Thanks for posting ..we may be on very different wavelengths! Are you saying that because the Karen Matthews trial and the revelation that there had in fact been no murders at the Jersey home are child-related news, we shouldn't cover them as stories? That we shouldn't invite social workers to get in touch because the biggest story of the week, that of Baby P, is about a baby?
That's my understanding of what you've written but do forgive me if I've misinterpreted your posting. If it's news we do it, whatever the age-profile of the protaganists involved.
Thanks
Victoria
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Hello again Victoria
Your posting above would suggest you are getting a little silly now . I never suggested these stories were not newsworthy I was clearly making the point that over the last 3-4 YEARS your shows content has dumbed down severly and as a result you have loads of This Morning/Jeremy Kyle/Hello Magazine esq items on your show (similar to Ashleys strory) and it was quite bizzare that in trying to disagree with this you highlighted that your show that day provided other children related items and a child related phone in rather than offering a different type of arguement.
I also clearly raised the point that I didn't believe your claims that you have only ever recieved two blog postings and no phone calls or e-mails complaining about the dumbing down process that has occured at 5live the most recent being the removal of the midday news from your shedule, replacing it with a Nicky Campbell phone in.
Are you still trying to claim you have only ever had 2 blog postings and no phone calls, texts or e-mails complaining about the dumbed down direction 5live has taken and continues to take?
I aslo clearly said that if you carry on with the dumbing down process 5live will be left with as much credibility as Hello magazine.......
Quite how you managed to interpret this as me thinking you should not have covered the baby P or Karen Matthews stories in completely beyond me, like I said I presume you were just being silly.
If you want continue to pretend that the majority of 5live listeners are happy with the dumbed down direction the station has taken in the last few years then fine just don't ask those listeners for advice about the show then disagree with them, and lie to them... Especially when these listeners are only trying to do you a favour by pointing out your show gets worse the more dumbed down it gets and are trying to save you from the slagging you presonally take as a result of this.
cheers
Arab
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Arab, I agree with you 100 %
Start listening Victoria !
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Agree entirely Arab.
Victoria is in a state of denial about the content of her show. She clearly sees her main 'competitors' as commercial TV like Jeremy Kyle and This Morning. Clearly she watches these shows on her days off....and then tries to copy them on radio.
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Of course by the nature of the media some topics trivial or otherwise will cross from tv to radio to the press etc...and no one has said don't have light and shade but mucj of the so called news areas of Radio 5 unless a really big story breaks that cannot be ignored where perhaps Human life is in danger but really the only programmes that covers news without always joking and having banter is drive or UAN when Rod Sharpe is fronting it...
Mayo gives a reasonable example of how a magazine type programme(if that's what you are trying to do)could be attempted.
But Breakfast is too full of presenters trying to funny and clever and they ofeten distract from the stories being covered(no they don't have to be serious as in Radio 4's Today)and the 10pm-1am slot leaves much to be desired.
It wasn't always that way.
The news area of the station needs tightening up. The production teams need to rethink matters as much as anything as it's a joint effort.
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I totally disagree with Arab and the above posters. I enjoy Victoria's show because it covers such a wide range. I like to be kept up to date with the latest news and sport but I also like to hear about issues that effect peoples lives.....however to get back to the point of this blog, I found Ashley and Victoria's interviews very moving. I cannot ever imagine being able to give up my child. I also thought Ashley seemed very possessive of Victoria but it was so much better for all three of them that he admitted his real fear of harming his child.
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superbusymum
With respect you are clearly the sort of person the VD programme is all about.
It's superbusymum radio for superbusymums - like Victoria I imagine. It's radio for the Jeremy Kyle & This Morning audience.
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MarmadukePickles
I found your post incredibly patronising.
I am very busy, I am a mum of 3 and I am very very super. Also for your information I don't care for This morning and I've never watched the Jeremy Kyle show (so cannot comment on it). I am a professional who listens to VD most mornings while I am working and I enjoy it!
P.S If you look hard enough on your radio you will find the off switch, you are free to use it.
Oh, I almost forgot, with respect (natch!).
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at least the silly baby related topics makes a welcome relief from Victoria and chums brown nosing the sports stars and having phone in on who should lead the England team out in 2065!
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Hi superbusymum
I really appreciate yr post. Thankyou. And I feel I ought to apologise for the unecessary hostility you received. Please don't let it put you off posting in the future.
Thanks
Victoria
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Sorry about above typo - unnecessary I mean...
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Thats the way Victoria!
thank and apologise to the people that like your dumbed down, baby and ratings obsessed approach and no comment to the rest....
You must agree surely your childish attitude turns your blog into complete joke.
Another child related blog today I see.....what a suprise!!
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