Ryder white flag
There's a lot of you out there who don't actually believe you should call golf a sport. I don't care whether it's a bleeding parlour game, you cannot knock the Ryder Cup.
I don't know if the Beeb have it in their armoury to buy this tournament back - but along with England football internationals and home cricket series', there's a desperate need for people to get this entertainment without installing a dish.
Having said that, I listened to the 5Live coverage and then watched the highlights and you have to say golf on the radio is brilliant. It's all hushed whispers and winces as the commentators rub shoulders with the fans.
Sometimes, to put it bluntly, you can hear buttocks clenching as John Murray or Andrew Cotter do their best Ted Lowes over the latest European eight-footer.
There are some things that don't come easy about the Ryder Cup. I mean, it's still hard for me to get me head around the idea of singing 'Europe, Europe, Europe!' I can't say I've ever met a Swede or a Spaniard and shook him warmly by the hand and said: "You and me, united by a continent, eh?"
I mean I can't imagine a team made up of Indians, Chinese, Iraqis and Malaysians all getting together and chanting 'Asia, Asia, Asia!' but maybe it'll come to that one day. I'd love to see a team of Southern Hemisphere golfers join the party - Aussies, South Africans, South Americans... but what would their fans be singing? 'Come on you South of the Equatorers'?!
I also can't quite understand why they'd call a golf course Valhalla. Isn't it a resting place for Norse Gods or summat? Perhaps that's what Odin and Thor have been doing in their retirement. One minute they're tossing thunderbolts and hurricanes at unsuspecting mortals, the next they're buying cosy Pringle sweaters and slipping a hip-flask into their Rupert Bear trousers.
Europe lost fair and square of course, notwithstanding the occasional marshall that managed to get himself between a Mickelson hoick and a watery grave. The Yanks were the underdogs and it suited them.
Their team looked like it'd been bussed in on the back of a jeep. The duo of Weekley and Holmes made me think the Dukes of Hazzard had gone to seed.
Boo was the man of the week, wasn't he? I can see him back in his thick check shirt this morning, fried steak and fries piled up in front of him and three dead raccoons on a stick at his side while he sips moonshine out of an unmarked bottle. The Ryder Cup must be a piece of p**s if you've been wrestling alligators that morning.
I wonder if he finds golf a bit cissy, to be frank. And Holmes look less like a golfer off the tee and more like a very bloody angry lumberjack. Marvellous stuff.
In fact the Yanks had bags more characters all round than we've seen in a while. The lad Kim was fantastic and made Garcia look like a tired old lag in need an armchair, while Mahan, who previously suggested it was a bit like slavery to play the Ryder Cup, proved himself a willing volunteer.
But why would you call your son Hunter? Were his parents expecting him to be a Gladiator when he grew up?
Kenny Perry was also great value as the (good) old boy - although I'm now convinced his actual name is Kenny-Perry-the-Local-Man-Kentucky-Through-And-Through.
Generally, Europe were a bit feeble in the end. Poulter was the exception. He was brilliant. It doesn't stop me thinking that the man's a bit of a pillock, mind. He's always going to be the bloke who said that when he gets it right "it'll be just me and Tiger".
He's getting better but Woods can still beat him - and everyone else - on one leg so there's work to do. Faldo should be given great credit for picking him, of course. Poulter's a man in his own image in many ways and although I wouldn't entirely blame Faldo for the team's defeat, I wouldn't want him as captain again.
There wasn't one interview he gave or one comment he made that wasn't undermined by some incomprehensible joke or touchy little snipe, like someone was having a go at him. The man's got more chips on his shoulders than Boo has on his plate.
Azinger out-flanked him in all aspects really - not least in having a team that got around the course, while he was getting in the ears of his players.
Faldo, by contrast, seemed to spend a bit too much time chatting to DJ Spoony. Now Spoony's a nice lad by all accounts but I'm not sure what he was doing there... keeping the European MP3's up to date? Helping the guys kick back after a hard day at the club-face with some chillin' grooves and a bit of funky garage or whatever the hell else passes for music these days?
I mean who the heck is going to be in the team next time? Is Tim Westwood going to replace Lee? Will we have Paul Casey and the Sunshine Band or the Darren Clarke Five?
Not that we mind really. It's good to give the Americans the Cup for a bit. They might well've gone off the idea if they kept getting beat... you know what Americans are like. That's why they play so many national sports in the USA that don't get played in many other places.
So let 'em have it for a couple of years and we'll see how they get on in Wales in 2010.
Oh, and bring back Woosie!
I'm Derek Robson. People call me Robbo. Legend has it I was raised in the furnace and smog of Teesside. Some might say I took the hard road. I like to tell folk I had trials for Middlesbrough, for Hartlepool and for burglary (not guilty). I've always loved sport. My job is to say it as I see it - whether it's in the bar of the Blue Bell or on this blog. You won't find me calling a spade a soil-redistribution implement.
© MMIX~RS~q~RS~~RS~z~RS~59~RS~)
Comments
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Agree about Faldo. He made some good calls and some bad and our defeat was down to the "big guns" not performing.
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Can we please stick to football?
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You are to be congratulated on your singular lack of knowledge of the continents of the Southern Hemisphere. Bravo.
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In the pub last night, my mate told me DJ spoony was their official DJ.
I thought the lad was having a laugh, so - as to not get sucked into the horrible world of pub gulibility i ignored him and quickly changed the subject.
I take it though that he was infact speaking the truth. who wouldve thought it... eh?
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What was wrong with his knowledge of the countries of the southern hempisphere??
He wasn't writing a comprehensive list.....
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You made one good point for sure. We need the major home sporting events on terrestrial.
It seemed to slip under the radar with everything else going on at the time but taking the Ashes off the listed sporting events that are protected for terrestrial viewing was a cultural crime committed under the government of Tony Blair.
Is there anyway we can get them back?
As for golf - its not my game but I know many people who are totally obsessed. I'm imagining they feel the same way about the Ryder Cup.
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Not all Americans agree with Boo's lack of class but he is who he is and you can't argue with his results.
I thought the reason for them opening it up to all of Europe was to help give you a chance to win? :)
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Ah, so that's who that guy was! I'm with you Robbo - "house" and "garage" to me are places to park oneself and one's car.
The yanks played amazingly well on Sunday - the majority of their winners were 6, 7 or even 8 under par after 14/15 holes - they literally holed everything. We were a mixed bag of rookies playing well and big guns playing averagely against a team practically all on top of their game. Faldo comes across as a bit of a berk but I doubt this really reflected in the outcome of the Cup.
As for their abuse - I say stuff the Stiff Upper Lip, no polite clapping to gain the moral ground - let's go one better! Fat suits for fancy dress for starters and let's send pizzas to their hotel rooms at 3am (no wait, scratch that...make it salads at 3am).
Here's to retaining the trophy in 2010!
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Is that a T-Rex pun in the title - Ride a White Swan eh? Are you a secret glam rocker?
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BBC coverage of the Ryder cup was traditionally rubbish - always breaking away for the 3:14 at Goodwood, much like the cricket coverage
Sky offer it unbroken the entire weekend with excellent analysis
If BBC didn't treat big sporting events as second rate knock-a-bouts, they might still have some of the sport
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Kapnag,
The point is not everyone has access to sky or wants to put hard earned money into Rupert Murdoch's pockets. They shouldn't have to for sporting events of national importance.
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The Problem is that sky do it so well
The ryder cup - superb coverage
The ashes - again fantastic
NFL - second to none coverage showing how sports should be covered
the only issue i have with SKY is the cost and their football coverage
for me football will always be BBC saturday nite with motty and ol' lineker
superb!
BTW robbo gr8 article again m8!
wales 2010 we'll bring back the ryder cup and hopefully woosey will be back for it aswell with clarke and monty in tow
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Can someone tell me how I can get "unbroken" coverage by SKY?
I seem to recall the adverts coming on every ten bleeding minutes!!!
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I think the Europeans did REMARKABLY well considering all the stuff going on at home at the moment. This credit crunch must SURELY be playing on their minds.
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I believe you would call a team of Saffers, Ausies and South Americans "Antipodeans".
As for Julian Meteor - I would call him a "loon" - why would golfers who earn millions of pounds/euros every hour give a damn about the price of cheese/wine/bread and milk. Except Monty, who as I recall has been through a very costly divorce of late, but as he was left out of the team for being too old, he doesn't count.
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if i remember correctly monty wasnt left out for being too old but for not having a fair round of gof for about 6 years.
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Witty stuff, glad to see you and most of the boys on the little island taking the loss like men. Surprised and happy to hear some criticism of Poulter from your end. For many here he and his frosted tips have replaced Garcia as the most annoying European with whiny Westwood a close second. Just curious, what else has Europe or the UK ever beaten the USA at where we decided to stop playing? We never thought of quitting, we just wanted to finally win one again. Looking forward to Wales in '10.
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How many from the 'European' Ryder Cup team come from outside UK/Ireland? It can't be many? The reason I ask is that living in Belgium, I have loads of UK and European tv channels, and no-one was showing this event - not even hi-lights. There is no interest in it on the mainland. Maybe they should revert to the original format. (what was that, by the way - England or UK or British Isles versus US?)
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Lets talk about Newcastle again, that was much more fun
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#3. Chad Sexington - if that is your name. Where do you get off with your cack about me being wrong about the Southern Hemisphere? I know most Australians on the planet live in London but the country itself is well south. South Africa is most definitely Southern Hemisphere too. And all right if you live at the top of South America you might scrape into the Northern Hemisphere, but that's it, mate! There's only one thing worse than a smart-a**e and that's a thick twerp who thinks he's a smart-a**e.
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EuroPaddy, Don't you get Canal+ in Belgium?
I thought most French TV could be picked up there. Anyway they had hours of coverage and no ads.
As for the European content; 2 Spaniards, 2 Swedes and a Dane. That enough for you?
Sexington's worried that the great golfing nations of Venezuela, Colombia and Surinam might be offended.
Perish the thought.
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Europaddy, I live in Madrid and had coverage of the whole event. Wonderful TV.
Fleprechaun just beat me to this but well said
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It depends where you live. In Flanders (north) canal+ is only available on satellite (I took cable), but in the 2 French speaking regions it's available, but then you have to live with the plastic French (give me the plastic Dutch any day...)
I knew about the Spaniards, but not the others - thanks. Do you know the original format?
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EuroPaddy. The original format, pre 1979, was Great Britain and Ireland vs USA.
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I loved the coverage of the Ryder Cup - SKY does an excellent job of it.
Alas, if the BBC (and the government) had more vision all those years ago when they had a chance to do something similar - the BBC may well have been where SKY are now.
Faldo looke strained througout and it seemed as though the pressure was way too much for him. So I think Woosy should be the next Captain - being in Wales and all.
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I don't know all that much about golf but why is it called the ryder cup and why is it europe against USA . the biggest event in golf so im told and half the world don't even take part. Whats the point of that.
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'Antipodes' is a word which refers to two specific points which are on opposite sides of the world.
So we can refer to Australia and New Zealand as the Antipodes, as they are almost exactly half way round the world, around 12-13,000 miles away
But South Africa and South America we cannot call the Antipodes.
The Ryder cup is not a 'Continental Clash'. Europe don't play 'North America', because that would include Canada and Mexico.
We play the USA. And originally it was the UK and Ireland versus the USA until we kept getting beaten.
The Southern hemisphere Continents are:
Oceania - not Australia - including Vijay Singh (fiji); and South America. as far as I am aware Antarctica has no elite golfers.
Africa and Central America span both northern and southern hemispheres
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My apologies, Central America it seems, is wholly in the northern hemisphere.
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