A "good death"?
Death.
I was struck by Keith Floyd apparently keeling over after what could only be described as a "good lunch". Wouldn't that be a lovely way to go?
I wonder if you have a tale of a "good death" you'd be willing to share with the wider world. Of course I would want to exclude being surrounded by family, or quietly in your sleep. Those are probably a given.
But if you have any other "good death" examples I'd love to hear them.
Listen to PM
© MMIX~RS~q~RS~~RS~z~RS~49~RS~)
Comments
Sign in or register to comment.
This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.
To leave this mortal coil after doing something you enjoy (or even during doing something you enjoy) must be the best way to go.
No decent stories though sorry!
Complain about this comment
I want to die after I have done all the things I have been putting off. Then I will die peacefully and contented.
Complain about this comment
A friend of mine was playing chess with his father, he got up to get him a glass of whisky. When he returned a few moments later, his father was dead in his chair.
Complain about this comment
Mansaylo, Was your friend getting one or two glasses of whisky? That may be the difference between a good and bad death for your friends father.
Complain about this comment
A friend has just lost his elderly father, a few days after the father (who lived in Canada)had returned from a trip here to visit the family. He had been to church, had a nice lunch seeing all his friends again, went home and died. You can't ask for better organisation than that - all loose ends tied up, by the sound of it!
Complain about this comment
To quote the late Bob Monkhouse:
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather.
Not screaming in terror like his passengers. :-D
Complain about this comment
I was amazed Keith Floyd was only 65 - I remembered him as being at least in his 50's in 1980!
Complain about this comment
Reading his obituary in the Telegraph [and some coverage from the Evening Post] I'm rather tempted to stock up on red wine and start smoking Gauloises. What is the point of living to 98 if one's life is tedious and dull and completely unmemorable ?
Married four times, bankrupt twice - but hey, 'you only live once'...
Complain about this comment
According to the report I read in the Indy, Mr. Floyd had gone back to his partner's home following that lunch, with the remains of the Cote du Rhone, to watch the Channel 4 programme. Given that his autobiography was also being serialised and therefore that he was back in the limelight, I'd say his death was pretty nigh perfect. It would appear he became unwell just as the programme was to be broadcast. Odd to think that, as I and hundreds of thousands others watched him and were shocked at how ill he looked, he was in fact dying.
Complain about this comment
Cheers to Keith Floyd, and a brilliant comment from lordBeddGelert, 'you only live once' has got me into alot of trouble, please add 'never lived in regret' to my hesadstone.
Complain about this comment
He was such a character - it is a comfort to think he had a "good" death.
No tales of same, sadly. In my experience "died peacefully" is used to reassure those who weren't there.
Complain about this comment
I suppose a good death would be one you didn't know you were having.
But then, some people would want to set things straight, say goodbye, etc.
Pain-free would be a good start - if at all possible
Complain about this comment
Frances - I agree entirely. As my job sometimes (sadly) involves euthanasing animals, I think many pets get a better death than people.
Complain about this comment
my father in law was in Wales working as a volunteer on the Ffestiniog railway with his friends and staying in a bunkhouse. He went to make a cup of cocoa and was missed. He had had a heart attack. If I could sign up for a death like that I would..aged 85, with your mates doing what you like..as the meerkat would say, 'simples..'
Complain about this comment
For those of us left behind, a chance to say goodbye, I love you and possibly sorry would make things easier; but is that selfish?
Complain about this comment
My mother and various relations died a good death: they were loved and they had enough time to make their peace with God. And it does take time. One aunt, towards the end, said `I´m ready to go now´ and an uncle (91) looked forward to seeing his dead children and his siblings after death.
Complain about this comment
My Mum and Dad, both in their 80's had been out for lunch.
Mum said she was tired when they got home and went for a
lie down, telling Dad when asked, that she would like sausages
for tea! Mum was a salad, fish or stir fry fan! Why the sausages
we wondered when she didn't wake up.
Dad popped off a couple of months later after 10 days in hospitel. Neither were on any medication. Not bad I reckon.
Complain about this comment
GossyMrs, you may well be right. But this is to dip my toe into controversial waters, and I'm not in the mood.
That part of your work must be a hard thing to do, but at least peace and no (more?) pain is what most of us would wish for any we love.
Complain about this comment
My mother passed away quietly one morning, within 2 years of my father.She clearly missed him.She died ,so Im told, without pain while reading the Guardian,dropped on her lap.I'd like to think the racing page was her last sight of anything worldly.This is exactly how she wanted to go,and albeit I did not say goodbye,I have few regrets as I told her I loved her,and visited ,reglarly.
Complain about this comment
Well, I see Keith's death differently. I blogged about him myself this morning. The sting's in the tail.
http://www.goodfuneralguide.co.uk/2009/09/now-lettest-thou-thy-servant-depart-in.html
Complain about this comment
I am a lifeboatman. A few years ago we were called to assist an elderly gentleman who had been sailing for the day. He had dropped his anchor in a pretty bay, gone ashore for a curry and a couple of glasses of red wine. Once back on board he began to feel chest pains before having a massive heart attack and dying. While we all agreed that it was very sad that he had passed on (particularly so for his family), we also all felt that his time had come and he'd died a great 'sailors' death...
Complain about this comment
When my great grandmother died she had her two daughters on either side of her bed and they were all laughing at a joke.
Complain about this comment
Well, an elderly neighbour from many, many years ago went off on holiday by coach. She enjoyed her week away (can't remember where but within the UK) and caught the coach home. When it arrived at Victoria for her to change for the local bus she didn't get off. The driver came to wake her up but she had died. I think that's a pretty good way to go.
There's always another point, though. Someone very dear to me died in his sleep a few years ago. He'd visited the doctor only the week before and been told he was fighting fit. He kissed his wife goodnight and went to sleep, never to wake. Great for him - devastating for everyone who knew and loved him. The same happened to another friend - his whole community was stunned. These were all natural causes and pretty 'instant'. Charles is right, it's death that makes life precious and the only 'good' thing about those deaths I've just described is that nobody saw it coming. The aftershock, though, takes years to get over.
For those with the hope of eternal life, at least there will be a reunion.
Complain about this comment
Death is not the end! It is always in the middle. We will most likely still be wondering what is going to happen next on "The Archers", meaning to fix the tap, making our minds up who we will be voting for and where we are going on holiday.
Is there anything one can think, do or say, a way one can live, that will honour this most momentous personal event, that must cut directly across every dimension in which our lives move? I guess that is the question religions try to answer, but the only thing they seem to agree on is that one should be good - which seems fair enough. I think a good death sounds like a lot of fun - though LIFE may still be hurting us - certainly more interesting than wine and cigarettes!
I hear William Blake died singing....
Complain about this comment
Frances, 16, see above - the chance is today and it is not selfish, but pointless to see the possibility and still live as though it will never happen. It will!
Complain about this comment
Woody Allen famously said, "I'm not afraid of dying; I just don't want to be around when it happens!" and in this age of triviality, it sounds as though most of my fellow-listeners agree with him heartily. But most of the wise ones who have ever lived say one of the goals - if not THE goal - of life is to die CONSCIOUSLY. All the good deaths I've been around were more or less conscious and COURAGEOUS. Sorry, Woody and the rest of you!!
Complain about this comment
27 (endorsement)
Complain about this comment
My Father -in-Law frequently had lunch at a business mans organisation. This particular day dressed ready for a friend to collect him and sat in his usual lounge chair. Whilst waiting he must have passed away, but in his inside jacket pocket was his cheque book with a cheque made and signed for his lunch. He died at peace which i will always be thankful for.
Complain about this comment
A lovely woman I knew, who had suffered from poor health for a number of years, had been struggling for the previous several months as her emphysema worsened. On a particularly lovely day, her husband took her out in the car to some of their favourite places. She told him, before retiring to bed, what a special day it had been, and went to bed smiling and very happy. She died in her sleep.
Unfortunately for us, she died a month before our wedding, and as she would have been my mother in law, this was particularly poignant for my husband and I. We thought of postponing the wedding, but because she was particularly anxious for us to marry, we knew that she would have been very upset had we done so.
We were both so glad, however, that she'd gone to bed happier than she had been for many months.
This is my little homage to her - a lovely woman who I still miss.
Complain about this comment
And now we've lost Mary Travers. I was unaware of her battle against leukaemia, and can only imagine how hard her final years must have been, having seen others battle this cruel disease. I hope she is now at peace.
Complain about this comment
My grandfather had a good death. He fell in to a vat of whisky but before he died he had to pull himself out 3 times to go to the loo.
Complain about this comment
At the age of 69 my Mum had her hair done, called at my house so that I could admire the new hairdo and set off to go to a New Year pensioners' party. She collapsed and died from a heart attack before she got to the bus stop. She hadn't been ill and didn't know that she had a heart condition. She was wearing her best clothes and had a smart hairdo. That's how she would have wanted to go and I'd settle for the same.
Complain about this comment
Id like to die laughing.
Complain about this comment
My son died recently in his mid thirties. He had a heart condition but he didn't let it stop him doing the things he enjoyed. He was leading a very full and happy life when he died suddenly. A great shock for those of us who are left but a great joy to know that he was living the life he wanted.
Complain about this comment
My mother died quietly in hospital following several strokes, she believed in God and believed she was going to be re-united with my father and died with a smile on her face, the day before she died she opened her eyes and looked straight at me and said "I can see your halo my son" these were her last words and i will always treasure them, i was the only one of her 4 sons who was there and this was my reward.
Complain about this comment
I knew a man who tried to commit suicide four times and failed. He did it because he felt that his life hadn't been a success. I made him laugh by saying that he wasn't even a success at commiting suicide. He died aged 89.
Complain about this comment
BS 10, As they said about Elvis Presley's death, "Good career move."
Complain about this comment
According to my father in law, my mother in law's last words to him when she died a few years ago were 'You only married me for my money'. Unfortunately, he has a nasty habit of relating this story to his son, her child.
She died in her sleep. He remarried within two years.
I think her death was quite peaceful, but it would help if Life after Death could be a bit more civilised.
Complain about this comment
BS 39, Did she really have any money?
Complain about this comment
I think there had been money at one time, but not a great deal and much diminished over time, largely (I suspect) because her husband liked to live the high life.
Complain about this comment
My problem is that I have done two things in life that made me rather insensitive about death. First, I delivered flowers to most of the funeral homes and cemeteries on the east side of Cleveland and saw dead bodies all over the place, including on the floor of the embalming room one funeral home that will remain unnamed, and helped move a few around. Second, when I worked in archaeology, I dug up loads of Roman and Saxon burials and slept in a building full of boxes of skeletons. An undertaker I knew kept false teeth from bodies and put them in the holes on golf courses when he was playing. Another shoved empty bottles or rolled up newspapers up the sleeves of suits to make the arms of dead'uns look bigger.
Complain about this comment
BS 41, So, she was right.
Complain about this comment
Maybe, maybe not. I just wish he'd keep his thoughts to himself and stop upsetting my husband, though.
Complain about this comment
BS 44, People can be insensitve.
Complain about this comment
View these comments in RSS