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Hearsay...

Eddie Mair | 13:09 UK time, Tuesday, 23 September 2008

What subscribers to the PM Newsletter have overheard...

Overheard at an exhibition today at the NEC - and coming from a cubicle in the ladies toilet: "NO! I'm on the TOILET on the phone!!"

Mother to child: "You touch everything you come into contact with."

My husband (asleep): "I've only got two and I ordered twenty!" Never did find out what they were...

Overheard a woman on a bus say " We've got some stuck in a potato in the bathroom". Years ago, but it still haunts me.

Overheard - "But we still haven't found the snake..."

I once overheard a woman telling her friend that her husband had called her a prostitute. She told her friend she ' was going to have him for definition of character '.

Just overheard in work, boss to someone on her team (a male): "Can I have a few minutes of your time in the meeting room please, and I want you to be totally honest...."

ok so technically, i wasn't the overhearer here but the overheard, but i love this. i was forced to see Titanic at the cinema. i was ranting at my sister, who was responsible for the choice of film, about how it was basically a snuff movie, seeing as it depicts the horrible icy deaths of real people in living memory. during the trailers, i was saying something about "when it sinks at the end" when the woman sat behind us had a go at me for ruining the end of the film.

At the end of last week I overheard an elderly woman tell her friend that she was really disappointed that the 'paralysed Olympics' had come to an end.

Overheard a while ago and stuck in my memory: "We went on several holidays with Graham..." (pause) "that was before he died of course."

Overheard in a supermarket.......'The last I heard he was in Mexico, but she doesn't know'.

Tall, well-dressed woman to man sitting in restaurant shifting uncomfortably in his chair "WELL did you seduce her?"


After arriving at a beautiful picnic spot on lake Windermere, and letting about four children out of the car, the man's wife opened the car boot and was heard to say 'where's the picnic basket' to her husband.


"he always smells of toasted cheese."


Once overheard on a bus in Sunderland - a woman looking at a library book which had Botticelli's 'Venus' on the page. She turned to her friend and said, "Look. There's that painting by Botulism."


Overheard in the staff room of my school today: "I don't make much noise when I'm screwing".

"... I mean, we last did it half a year ago!"

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