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Filth

Eddie Mair | 13:36 UK time, Wednesday, 27 September 2006


Did you catch the last item on The World at One today? They spent several minutes discussing busty regulation. The production team insists it was an altogether different item, about bus deregulation. We are looking into it and could well have a clip on the blog before long so you can decide for yourself.

Wishing you well, wherever I am, etc

Comments

  1. At 01:41 PM on 27 Sep 2006, big sister wrote:

    Busty regulation? Mmm, I think we know where Eddie's mind is ...... C'mon, Eddie, if you're really nice to her she might let you on the Desert Island.

  2. At 01:56 PM on 27 Sep 2006, John W wrote:

    wasn't it Fig on Eddie's mind?

  3. At 01:58 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Tony Jenner wrote:

    There's always that other Radio4 show for angry bedwetters - "Cross Incontinents"

  4. At 01:59 PM on 27 Sep 2006, David Buckland wrote:

    An anonymous PM Newsletter. I wonder who it was from.......

  5. At 02:06 PM on 27 Sep 2006, russell wrote:

    it was busty regulation for sure - i laughed outloud directly into the face of my bangers n mash

  6. At 02:17 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    Oh deary deary me, Eddie, this feud with KW has got to you, hasn't it!

  7. At 02:26 PM on 27 Sep 2006, The Stainless Steel Cat wrote:

    Surely it's Georgia on Eddie's mind?

  8. At 02:27 PM on 27 Sep 2006, big sister wrote:

    Nope, John W, Fig's on the back burner for Lord Mair at the moment.

  9. At 02:40 PM on 27 Sep 2006, big sister wrote:

    FF - 'Wark' was that? - KY, surely?

  10. At 02:54 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Susan Orty-Boyden wrote:

    Eddie,

    Your'e a remarkable man. A remarkable servant to blogs. And that is the truth.

    You are the future now. Make the most of it.

  11. At 03:00 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    d'oh! Big Sis is right, it should be KY. Of course, that opens up a world of possibilites for smutty jokes, and I don't want to be accused of lowering the tone of the blog...

    sb10

  12. At 03:30 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Roberto Carlos Alvarez-Galloso,CPUR wrote:

    Busty Regulation of Bus Deregulation? No Comment.

  13. At 03:40 PM on 27 Sep 2006, valery pedant wrote:

    FF - a freudian slip surely?

    Sorry, off to do some work in penance. I've got the chocolate raisins open already. Who's was the Turkish Delight?

    sb12

  14. At 04:00 PM on 27 Sep 2006, The Stainless Steel Cat wrote:

    Valery (13):

    What's the weather like in Penance? Watch out for those Pirates!

  15. At 04:29 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    Valery(13) Are you implying that Eddie is wearing a slip?

    sb15

  16. At 04:36 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    Has anyone else noticed that there is someone pinging a bicycle bell in the background during interviews at the party conferences? What is that about, as they say. I suppose it could be drunken MPs toasting Shaun Ley, which would make marginally more sense... Would you kindly send an intrepid reporter to find out more?

    [myunreadablescriptsignature]

  17. At 05:09 PM on 27 Sep 2006, David McNickle wrote:

    Eddie,
    Phew, I thought that I was the only person who heard it that way. I was wondering what size they were limiting them to.

  18. At 06:03 PM on 27 Sep 2006, valery pedant wrote:

    SSC - sadly, no pirates, not even Johnny Depp
    :0(

    FF - you mean you didn't know?
    Where's Aperitini's postcard btw - will she get it posted up by Lissa when she's got the techy stuff sussed d'you think?

    Sb18

  19. At 06:05 PM on 27 Sep 2006, valery pedant wrote:

    Annasee - your cleaner's been charged! How are you going to sack her without being taken to the cleaners (Hope you didn't leave any tapes lying around before she went to court?)

    SB19

  20. At 06:12 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Emmanuel.K.Bensah II wrote:

    Oh Eddie Meur! The Brits, their quaintness; their terse language...and BBC Radio Four! I do miss you! No way of Radio Four ever coming to SW for Africa?:-(

    It's ok listening on-line, but only when you're at work and, let's face it: work comes above listening to Radio Four;-)

  21. At 06:53 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    re 18

    Well, I had my suspicions, but I didn't want to say anything!

    I'm sure Appy is having a lovely break (or at least I hope she is). And Give Lissa another day or so, and I think she'll be the Queen on BBC Blogs, given all the work she's had to do here

  22. At 06:53 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Zebedee wrote:

    Love the 'Cross Incontinents'.

    How about 'Woman Sour'? Its a program hosted by and for women whose traumatic life experiences have left them bitter, but who feel that sharing their woe with us is for the good of the nation.

    Oh, I see...

  23. At 07:34 PM on 27 Sep 2006, andycraComp wrote:

    What about the programme where the Prime Minister's son writes in every day to complain about public services, Post Office closures, restrictive legistlation etc?

    Euan Yours.

  24. At 07:34 PM on 27 Sep 2006, TheOtherRedBaron wrote:

    Or "Thinking Allowed" which sounds so much like "Thinking Aloud"


    Ha ha ha ha ha!

    Oh.

    I think they meant that one.

  25. At 09:55 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    SB24

    Hello All,

    Sorry I couldn't send a postcard - took the pet lapdog with me but the hotel didn't have internet access, which was infuriating for other reasons too. Neither did my room have an iron/board as advertised and there was a really funny smell in the lift. It was as if (apologies in advance) someone who'd eaten cabbage had just broken wind and slipped out before I got in - but it was there all of the time, so, unless I was being stalked by a flatulent being from half a minute into the furture, it was the lift itself. Other than that I drank too much wine and caught up with lots of people I hadn't seen for a while. Good stuff - would've been nice to have had longer.

    There - like sending a postcard after arriving home. Which I have also been known to do.

    I've just read back over all I've missed the last couple of days. I don't have a favourite Pervez, and I didn't enjoy all the stuff about Cherie Blair (strong woman in her own right therefore easy target, imo), so I don't feel too bad about being away.

    I'm getting the chocolate tomorrow - orders please?

    btw, I'd never put chocolate in the fridge either. Why would one want to eat something tooth-breakingly hard with no taste? Chocolate should be warm and comforting. But I still prefer crisps.

    Good to be home.

  26. At 10:26 PM on 27 Sep 2006, anne wrote:

    welcome back appy. Sorry to hear about your lift experience, but obviously it's not nearly as spooky as Eddie's - although probably MUCH more unpleasant really.

    I appreciate that strong women make easy targets, but they don't all paint huge black and white circles on their backs and jump up and down saying 'na na nan na na , can't hit me from there'. Which is what Cherie does, metaphorically. Sadly people CAN hit her from there, because she's stood still doing something stupid. There are strong women out there who don't behave like she does and they get respect, or if they don't the agenda of those who are getting at them is immediately apparent.

    Good of you to volunteer to do the chocolate run straight after coming back - as tomorrow is the one day this week when I don't have anything in the diary I can enjoy it at my leisure so I'll have a Green and Black's Maya Gold bar please, the money's in the left hand drawer. I'd ask you to get some crisps as well, but I have to show some self control.

  27. At 10:32 PM on 27 Sep 2006, valery pedant wrote:

    Welcome home Appy - glad you had fun, probably better to have no net access!

    Anne's put the idea of a picnic in my mind - so I'll go for one of those (let's hope it doesn't rain!)

  28. At 10:43 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Hi Anne,

    Nice choice on the Green & Black's - might follow suit.

    Re the Cherie Blair thing - only if you believe what the press say about her. They would love her to be that stupid, they really would. She isn't. She's just the first PM's wife to really have a life/career of her own and they don't like that. No one but her and those who were nearby will ever know exactly what happened and I don't really care what she did/didn't say. Plenty of wives don't get on with their husband's colleagues, after all. Just hate to see someone being vilified for being a successful strong woman in her own right.

  29. At 10:48 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Thank you Valery. Will do, but what's in a Picnic? I can't remember whether I like them (if it's fruit and nuts I don't).

  30. At 11:25 PM on 27 Sep 2006, TheOtherRedBaron wrote:

    Picnic is champagne, strawberries and selected continental meats.

    In my dreams, anyway. Usually it turns out to be corned beef sarnies and some orange juice.

    I enjoy both.

    What's in your prefered picnic, people?

  31. At 11:34 PM on 27 Sep 2006, anne wrote:

    Picnics have fruit, well raisins, and nuts and toffee and something solid-ish down the middle. Obviously I only eat them because they are good for you, - well they must be with all that fruit. and people are FOREVER banging on about how great nuts are for health and stuff.

    The good thing about visitors is that I bake and there is always stuff left, although it has to be said with the other half and a teenager in the house what is left rarely lasts long.

    We will never agree re C Blair Appy, but isn't that one of the loveliest things about growing up; that you can disagree with people but still be friends?

    Must be bedtime - with this lovely free day tomorrow I'm thinking of getting up early so that I can appreciate more of it!

  32. At 11:47 PM on 27 Sep 2006, Mr. G. Galloway wrote:

    sb 30

    Aperitif @28
    Plenty of wives don't get on with their husband's colleagues, after all.

    Interestingly (or perhaps not) my wife has always got on better wife with my colleagues, male or female, better than I have.
    She says she feels sorry for them. I don't understand that, they don't seem too badly off.

  33. At 08:16 AM on 28 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    sb 33

    Welcome back, Appy:o) You've been missed...

    As for chocolate, I feel in the mood for something dark and minty. I leave the actual choice up to you...

  34. At 09:15 AM on 28 Sep 2006, whisht wrote:

    Aperitif - I'm with Anne I'm afraid
    (erm, not actually with Anne obviously. Although of course if I was then I wouldn't be afraid at all... I'm sure I'd be delighted... oh dear... anyway...)

    I don't know if I agree with the correlation that the Press (and public to an extent) use Cherie as a target of fun because she is successful.

    To my mind, its because her words and actions make her a very large slow moving target for gags.

    Also, conversely, was Bill Thatcher (or even Mark??!) that successful that it meant we would rip the proverbial? No, again their business acumen was outshone by their relationship to She.

    Its just when given an easy target, its hard not to crack a joke.

    For the record, I like strong, intelligent women [sigh]

    though not when they're shouting (sorry debating at me in a restaurant....

    [ahem]

  35. At 10:39 AM on 28 Sep 2006, Sara wrote:

    Hello again if you've been away. Hope those still absent are having fun. Isn't it time for another postcard from John and Mrs H? And where IS Tobias these days?

    Good people, HELP!

    I have not bought a packet of cigarettes since 2 July - until last Sunday, that is, when I had a crisis involving important guests, a massive power cut and a half-cooked lunch. Since then, further major crises have reduced the remaining nine cigarettes to one.

    But last night I couldn't sleep for worrying about what I have done. Have I backslid? or backslided? or backslidden? Or must I have slid back (doesn't have enough guilt in it that way round). This conjugational crisis is threatening ciggy number 10 which I am trying to keep in case things get worse.

    Anyone got a light? No, no - I must stick to the chocolate like you do.

  36. At 10:40 AM on 28 Sep 2006, Annasee wrote:

    Morning Lissa
    Did I get moderated last night? (As in, "I'm afraid I can't remember a thing, I was completely moderated last night") I only ask because it was quite a long trancript & I'd hate to have to type it again. Perhaps mentioning "fifth floor television centre" was dangerous? My competition entry made it ok, but can't see anything in this thread where it should be ( around midnight- 1 am time - sad I know, but some of us have to work late)
    If you can sort it out, I've got a very special postcard I 'll send in. I guarantee it will be unique.
    Trusting you're happy in your work, and may your day be fulfilling & truly satisfying in every regard.

  37. At 10:44 AM on 28 Sep 2006, valery pedant wrote:

    The solidish bit down the middle is a kind of wafer-type affair, but it's got the toffee intertwingled with it so it's not like kitkat (tho I love them too, so that's not a criticism).

    As per, I'm sitting on the fence about Cherie B (there isn't a fence about her, you know what I mean), I agree with bits of all that has been said about her, and her predicament. I guess I just tend to take as I find, and since I haven't personally found her, then I'll never really know.
    I could take a judgement from what is reported about her, but who's to know what's true and what's exaggerated for others' benefit. It's gey wobbly up here on this fence - anyone else want to join me for moral support?*

    btw cherry b, wasn't that a drink when I were young? along with babycham, the genuine champagne perry, what happened to that too? we had a fabulous "champagne" glass with a picture of the bambi type creature (blue with a yellow bow?) printed on the side, and a golden rim. It was a big treat for me to have some lemonade out of it, especially when guests were round. Hmmm, perhaps that sparked off my appreciation of wine and the misconception as to its ability to cure all ills?

    *The more you write/read the word "her" the sillier it looks, but I haven't the will to go and edit some of them out....

    SB35

  38. At 11:02 AM on 28 Sep 2006, John H. wrote:

    Don't want to start a food fight or anything, but I think I'm slightly more aligned with Drinks on the Cherry issue.

    I suspect my position is slightly different because I think some of the flak that she gets is in part legitimate (in the sense of "that's what happens") sniping at people in public life. But I like Cherry. Whenever I hear her talking in her own right, I think she comes across as intelligent - she's successful, no doubt very wealthy, and happens to be married to the PM. So when I see people having a go, I don't really like it, but I'm sure she can handle it. I'd personally much prefer to see her in the news for other reasons, talking about stuff that matters to her, rather than just portrayed as a necessary spouse. I'm absolutely sure that some of the "attacks" are mean spirited and at least partially inspired by her success. But, hey, that's Blighty for you.

    Chocolate - I'll have a labrador, please. I'm guessing, Drinks, you're a cold (think "body heat" rather than "sensibility") person - correct?

  39. At 11:28 AM on 28 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    SB36

    Hi Guys,

    Chocolate is on the coffee table. FF, I got a Fry's Chocolate Cream for you: I'm not keen on dark chocolate myself, but my sister-in-law swears they are just the thing.

    Mind you, I'm a bit fed up - I guess it's my own fault for even commenting that I was glad to have missed the Cherie-bashing, but what do you all do? Have another go! And I can't resist putting the other side (like my mother says - always been contrary), so I will have to add, Whisht, how do you know what her "words and actions" are except through the prism of the media? I don't think she'd wonderful or awful - I just don't like to see her being attacked. And I know you were making some reference to Dennis Thatcher but I'm not sure what it was: however, I would remind you that he was a man - it's really, really not the same.

    Yes, Anne, it's great to be grown up and be able to disagree and still be friends. I think I'd better go of and eat my choclate on my own and calm down.

    When I come back can we talk about something else please?

    Fond farewells for the moment.

  40. At 12:29 PM on 28 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    SB40

    Hey John H (38).

    I like to think I'm "hot stuff" actually, but otherwise, I'm afraid you're going to have to enlighten me - why do you want a chocolate labrador? (what are you going to call it?) And what is it that you believe I prefer cold?

  41. At 01:02 PM on 28 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    SB41

    Crisps? That’s more like it. Unsalted, and you can keep the salt, etc.

    How many people do we only see through the media prism, btw?

  42. At 01:25 PM on 28 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Doc (41)

    Just about everyone in public life - unless we bother to go and seek them out/get involved in the organisation they belong to/research what they've said ourselves. That's why I'm always sceptical about what I read/see/hear - not just in terms of the speaker/writer, but of the media through which it is presented too. But automatic "I don't trust that person/organisation" cyncism turns me off... I think I really have aired my feelings on that one quite enough now.

    You'll need that salt to take a pinch of it with your daily dose of "through the prism", so I congratulate you on your decision not to take it with the crisps. My favourite crisps, however, are salt and vinegar flavoured, so I'm not sure where that leaves me.

    Chocolate dog, anyone?


  43. At 01:54 PM on 28 Sep 2006, John H. wrote:

    SB 43 I think.

    Smoky bacon are my favourite, though personally I think that crisps come in a variety of flavours not only to make a more interesting sales display, but because different ones are ideal on different occasions.

    Choco-lab - we have one. Very sweet - real risk of caries. Metaphorical and otherwise.

    Drinks, you've ruined my barely formed theory. I can melt chocolate just by looking at it. I've been developing the idea that people wot don't produce their own body heat enjoy chocolate at room temperature. Clearly it is twaddle.

    Finally, nice distinction between healthy scepticism and ugle cynicism - and one that needs to be made more often. I hate the "assume the worse" attitude even if I'm not exactly Mr Rose-Tinted-Specs. W.r.t. what is in the papers/other media, I'm sure I remember Ken Livingstone commenting that he endlessly read completely made up rubbish about himself in the rags and couldn't believe that people thought it was true. Importantly, he added, then he would see "10 things you didn't know about Elton John" (or whoever) and would himself think, "well, I didn't know that"...

  44. At 02:39 PM on 28 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    John H (43)

    A bloke once told that he "thought only fat lasses sweated that much". I think he thought he was making an ironic twist on a common back-handed complement, which I believe originated in "Viz". I pointed out that anyone who had been dancing for as long as I, with such enthusiam and (cockily) style would be perspiring that much too. Since then, I confess, I have noticed that I sometimes feel hot at lower temperatures than others do. But I think I feel cold in a draft before other people too. I don't know what that does to your theory, and it is way more inforamtion than you needed. However, as I'm sure you realise, I meant "hot stuff" in the metaphorical sense. And I like my chocolate at room temperature: not cold; not melting.

    Thank you for the note of appreciation re the sceptism/cynicism divide.

    What does "real risk of caries" mean???

    What else can you melt just by looking at it? Mrs H?...

  45. At 03:22 PM on 28 Sep 2006, John H. wrote:

    At the risk of sounding like a mutual-appreciation society - mind you, this whole blog commenting palaver (sp anybody?) is a bit like a huge mutual-appreciation society - I'll just say "Ta" Drinks for not metioning my "ugle" mistake. It makes me laugh - well, smirk - but it's still wrong.

    I can feel a new theory coming on - and this is despite the distraction of having to commit to my "possible chat up lines" book "thought only fat lasses sweated that much". I just overheat all over the place. Sometimes, this is not a problem, sometimes it is. However, I have noticed that there are certain conditions when I just lose my body heat and end up really cold. I don't think it's draughts for me, though. OK, it's not really a theory at all because I can't actually think of a way of characterising the conditions. Perhaps it's just that on the rare occasions that I can't produce enough heat, my body feels it really quickly.

    You'll notice that I'm ignoring your further "melt" question - lah, lah, lah - did somebody say it's time for crisps?

    Choco-lab -> dog made out of chocolate -> sweet -> rotting teeth -> metaphor -> rotting other things (not teeth) -> sweet -> dog not made out of chocolate (skin, bones, stuff like that) -> choco-lab.

    Perhaps I was meaning something more spiritual and was thinking former archbishops, or something.

  46. At 03:37 PM on 28 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    SB45

    I know someone who has had media coverage of one sort and another, so should be able to appreciate the above (42). Still, there ain’t none so public as them what’s in politics...

  47. At 05:06 PM on 28 Sep 2006, whisht wrote:

    hm - I realise that I'm rather childish and wasn't thinking of real criticism nor how its 'heard' (perceived)

    Sometimes I make clever-clever comments and at others simply stoopid jokes. Which is pure lazy thinking ignorance... all the stuff I hate. I usually notice this instantly when said by others (especially around race/ colour/ orientation) but hadn't appreciated it in myself enough ("look a large slow moving target! quick - hand me a jibe! ha ha ha ha!").
    Although I can't remember commenting on Cherie per se (I'm not really sharp enough) I'm sure I have elsewhere (a certain blog some days ago springs to mind).

    Its good to be pricked from time to time and have the scales lifted a little (although now, as Dr. H commented once):

    "Nurse - the blinds!"

  48. At 08:53 PM on 28 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Hello again everyone.

    I've just seen David M's post on an earlier thread about why he won't be back - which he seems to have come back to comment upon several times, so, David, if you're reading this gotcha! (Sorry, that sounds like something Noel Edmonds or Jeremey Beadle would say doesn't it?)

    John H (45), spelling fine - unless you meant "pavlova" but I don't think you did... How about this for a theory? - "Those whose body temperature varies by more than the standard deviation prefer their chocloate at room temperature". (If you can think of an easy way to test that scientifically you have too much time to think.) Don't add the chat up line to your little book - it doesn't work (or maybe that's just me). And anyway what need do you have for such a book??? - Quite evidently (from your refusal to elaborate) Mrs H just falls at your feet... Oh dear, I've just had a thought but I don't like to cast aspersions... suffice to say tsk tsk...

    Whisht, you sound troubled and I hope my earlier post wasn't the cause, but I agree, self-reflection is alwasy good and I am always ready to be pricked about my beliefs and behaviour (OK, not always - some days I feel too fragile - usually).

    btw, if I can resist the obvious innuendo in both Whisht's and my use of that phrase, so can the rest of you...

  49. At 11:33 PM on 28 Sep 2006, valery pedant wrote:

    How was the holiday John H? Thanks for the pc, sadly we would appear to have moved on in the postcard world since you went away, and now Lissa is publishing The Real Thing (in a blue peter style-y)

    Whisht, I think we all just do our best to say what we think, and all reserve the right to change our minds. No? I certainly do. The kind of thing that can be thrashed out much more quickly and effectively face to face, becomes clunky and protracted when we commit it to print in such a "temporary" medium - which then becomes permanent. However I still defend to the end, our right to express.

  50. At 09:34 AM on 29 Sep 2006, whisht wrote:

    ditto (now what's the etymolgy there i wonder??)

    was being a bit introspective yesterday - its a bugger you can't retract or edit your own entry but there you go.
    Faaarrrrr too hungover to comment on anything today except to say "ditto"

    I think I'll sneak it onto a client call later today....

  51. At 11:22 AM on 29 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Hungover Whisht?

    Drink is no replacement for the one who is your heart's desire (you didn't really think I had forgotten?)

  52. At 02:36 PM on 29 Sep 2006, Eleawhishtnor wrote:

    Aperitif - dunno who you could mean...

    drink is no replacement, but its a helluva way of forgetting!

    what it was i was meant to forget of course... I've forgotten

    btw someone has just explained to me why "hair of the dog" actually works - something to do with the body's inability to break down the 'wrong' type of alcohol unless it has a little of the 'right' alcohol...

    wasn't even tempted...

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