The disabled kiddie defence
Fans of Esther Rantzen or, more recently, Gaby Roslin will know that images of disabled children have frequently been used to tug at the nation's heart-strings. But that's nothing when compared to a disabled kiddie seemingly being used as part of the defence in a criminal trial.
All you desperately fashionable indie fans will know of The Libertines and the saga of their troubled singer Pete Doherty, who's been in and out of the band because of his drug addiction. In the past couple of days, he's been in court on the charge of possessing a flick knife - which normally results in a custodial sentence at Her Majesty's (Dis)Pleasure. However, according to a story in The Independent, the magistrate was swayed towards handing down a four-month suspended jail sentence - thus allowing Doherty to walk free from court - after he heard how the singer had performed at the bedside of a disabled girl.
OK, that wasn't the only factor in the court's ruling, but if you were cynical (like I am) you could all too easily imagine the tears in the magistrate's eyes as he learned of this pop star's selfless act. Sniff.
Monkey is temporarily lost for words.