Sir Thomas, Sir Paul, Sir Ian and Sir Christopher
Are you bewildered by the latest developments in the MP expenses scandal?
You needn't be. It's all really very simple.
Sir Thomas has asked around half of MPs to give money back - because, even if they followed the rules, the rules were wrong.
But Sir Paul says that Sir Thomas is being too harsh and that the rules were the rules.
Now Sir Ian is consulting on new rules that are different from the new rules which Sir Christopher wrote.
Sir Christopher has written to Sir Ian to say that he doesn't agree with the rules, but has no complaint about the way Sir Ian has done his job.
Meanwhile, Sir Stuart hints that Sir Ian and Sir Paul are right and that Sir Thomas and Sir Christopher are wrong.
Anyway, all you need to know - according to Sir Stuart - is that the Commons is putting its house in order.
I hope that's now clear. And it might be funny if it were not so serious. The expenses scandal has undermined the standing of Parliament, it has devastated the reputations of many individual politicians, and it has led to the largest number of retirements from the Commons since World War II - and still counting.
Today should have been a day when people could say "at least they are sorting out the mess". I fear that, as on so many other similar days, that is not how it will feel.