http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/ The Magazine's recommended daily allowance of news, culture and your letters. en Copyright 2009 Fri, 06 Nov 2009 15:36:00 +0000 http://www.sixapart.com/movabletype/?v=4.1 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss As a child of the 80s/90s, I clearly remember my parents banning any form of 'accent' on television. Sesame Street, Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles... even Eastenders. Though distraught at the time, I'm glad that they did. My job involves working with children on a regular basis, and I notice that some of them have distinct American twangs to their voices, particularly the girls, due to the influences of Hannah Montana and the High School Musicals. Rant over. Caroline Wallis, via Facebook Re Stadium Naming Rights. "One wonders if there are any fans now who refer to it as Ashburton Grove." Yes, there are quite a few fans who refer to the E******* as Ashburton Grove.Edd, Cardiff Yes, there are still people who call it Ashburton Grove.Ian C, Kent Michael (Thursday's letters), only if it sells cupcakes. Jim O'Connor, Winchester She blamed it all on a mix-up, I see...Graham, Frome Thank you for this week's Friday bear story. Can we have another one next week too?Dr Toes, Carharrack If this is a fish: > (Thursday's letters), then this: >, is a fsh! It's got no "i"! Ahahahahaha... Er. I'll get me oilskins.James, Stockport To Angela (Thursday's letters), this is a mouse ~~( )8>Emily Parry, Portsmouth http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/11/your_letters_787.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/11/your_letters_787.shtml Your Letters Fri, 06 Nov 2009 15:36:00 +0000 To Liam, Northampton (Wednesday's letters), steam engines where used to power machinery (pumping water out of mines, operating the machines in cotton mills), before the invention of the steam train. I'll get me coat. Martin, Manchester, Lancashire Liam (Wednesday's letters), it took over a century of development to get from the first stationary steam engines to the point where they could be made powerful and light enough to be used for locomotion. Tim, London The CIA's favourite Xtreme sport?Rahere, Smithfield So, after the Wicker Man, it's the Silicon WomanRob, Wales I believe it's traditional in most cultures for people to turn up at their own funeral. The only thing that made this story remarkable, but that wasn't mentioned in the headline, was that the individual was still alive.Bob Peters, Leeds, UK They're reopening a cafe on the ground floor of the building where I work. Does this mean that the recession is over?Michael Hall, Croydon, UK Okay I'm a little behind the times here (been busy, went out for lunch etc) but I'd just like to thank Fi (Wednesday's letters) for spelling her evil laugh with a "B". I have had looong discussions with a colleague who maintains it begins with an "M". But it doesn't. "Mwah ha ha" is someone laughing after they've air-kissed you.Kaylie, Runcorn, UK This is a fish >. Angelina Williams http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/11/your_letters_786.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/11/your_letters_786.shtml Your Letters Thu, 05 Nov 2009 16:20:14 +0000 Re the top 10 inventions, are Stevenson's Rocket and the steam engine not essentially the same thing? Liam, Northampton The £1,000 rail ticket that can be bought in advance for £561 seems an excellent example of a situation where one would advertise to all their associates how much they had saved, while still paying what seems to be an extortionate amount, perhaps even better than never-ending furniture sales. James O, Oxford Well done Steve Hill for your ecological thinking (Tuesday letters). Why use up fresh electrons on a new web-based news story when we can recycle the old ones. And it's far more interesting than some of the recent stories. P.S. are you really in the Women's Institute? Ralph, Cumbria Steve (Tuesday letters) - let it lie. Think of the Kids. Lee Pike, Auckland, New Zealand Kat (Tuesday letters), I initially agreed, and then went on to find my own moment illustrating your point. May I suggest "Anticiphany"? Bas, London I was so intrigued by the idea of a soup plot until I realised that I'd misread the headline. Adam, London, UK http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/11/your_letters_785.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/11/your_letters_785.shtml Your Letters Wed, 04 Nov 2009 17:10:13 +0000 "While cheerfulness fosters creativity, gloominess breeds attentiveness and careful thinking" (Feeling grumpy 'is good for you'). As someone who works in a creative industry where attention to detail is important, I'm wondering how I can find a middle ground here... would indifference do it? Sue, London Astute readers (and watchers) of the Oxford Street X-crossing story will notice that the "cymbal" struck by Boris Johnson is in fact a tam-tam. This is not to be confused with a gong, which, as we all know, has a raised boss or nipple and is tuned to a specific pitch. Sarah, Oxon I was at a course yesterday which involved some discussion of psychological problems in society and how we view them, and who should show up on screen but Drunk Girl to illustrate addiction (Paper Monitors and Letters passem). Alex K, Bath Does anyone know an expression for the emotional rollercoaster you experience when your interest is piqued upon seeing an awesome headline, followed by the disappointment of realising it can't possibly live up to your expectations as you click on it, succeeded by the euphoria of it being an even better story than you had initially imagined? Kat Gregg, Coventry It is indeed confusing, bx19 (Monday letters). As an English teacher I tell my students that "up to" suggests any number from (in this case) 1 to 70,000, whereas "as many as" suggests an estimate close to 70,000. A perfect example, I feel, of how statistics can be manipulated to mean whatever you want them to mean. Dick Savage, Plzen, Czech Republic Jan (Monday letters), a friend in London tells me it's gotten rather cold there. If you were a strawberry, would you grow in this weather? Nadja, north of Boston, US Julie - I always blame mine on the cat too. Good try, but I'm on to you... D Trump, Liverpool, UK Julie, my brother's cat often startles itself with the noises it produces. Basil Long, Nottingham Could you post a link to the Man marries goat story? I'm trying to get it back into the Most Read Top 10 again. Cheers in advance. Steve Hill, Milwaukee, WI, US Monitor note: OK, keep an eye out... and may she rest in peace. http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/11/your_letters_784.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/11/your_letters_784.shtml Your Letters Tue, 03 Nov 2009 15:32:12 +0000 Maisy (Letters, Friday), cats most certainly do break wind - very quietly! I have a small black cat named Shirley who makes the most vile smells - just when she has sat on my lap!!Julie, Leek I note from this week's 10 Things that bears do not in fact like honey. But has research been done into their liking for porridge? Or indeed pickernic baskets? May childhood beliefs are at stake here...Charlotte, Crystal Palace, London "Bears don't like honey" refers to black bears - this is what the TV programme was about. So why have you used a picture of a *brown* bear to illustrate the headline 10 Things - Bears don't like honey and nine other snippets"?Paul Levy, Lancaster Pre-promotion nominative determinism visible here.Bas, London I was going to write a witty comment about this story suggesting that we can still be considered a child at 25. I then realised I'd read it incorrectly, which was disappointing as I thought it meant I'd got a few more years left of taking my laundry home.Amy-Jo, London Re your poppy story: Poppies are NOT sold. They are distributed and donations welcomed and accepted. I assume this is the case in UK as well as Canada.Ernest Middleton, Dartmouth Nova Scotia Canada Why have strawberry and rasberry prices risen by 250% in the past week?Jan Maguire, High Easter, UK So, which is which? Up to, or As Many As?bx19, Warrington, Euroland http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/11/your_letters_783.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/11/your_letters_783.shtml Your Letters Mon, 02 Nov 2009 16:17:25 +0000 Now, this is what I call work experience. Ralph, Cumbria I thought the quote of the day was spot on. Most people have no idea what keeps a plane in the air, so having them praying rather than screaming is a much better option. I have joked with several airlines that if 100 years ago I had suggested that we lock people up in metal cylinders with fireworks attached to them, fired them into the air and that they would pay for the privilege, they'd think I was mad. John Airey, Peterborough, UK Re The methane makers: do cats break wind? Maisy, Milton Keynes Ah Halloween approaches again and I'm almost looking forward to it again. It's my one and only opportunity to ply all the neighbourhood's little darlings with the most E-number-laden sweets I can find, in the gleeful hope that they will be oh so hyper and badly-behaved by bedtime. BWAAHHH HAAAAAA HAAAAAA! Fi, Gloucestershire, UK "But an industry spokesman said it was not gravely concerned about Wal-Mart's move [to start selling coffins]..." I think I died a little inside when I read that. Caro, Lincolnshire Winner of the Caption Competition! Yeah, baby - we are the champions!! About the kudos. I know it's only a small amount but I would really appreciate it if you could let the Scouts handle it. I'd hate it to get spilt during a game of no-look basketball. Decoyman, Wallingford, UK Re Straw ends poll station axe plans: This could be construed as an all noun headline, although if it is, I'm not sure I want to think too much about what "Straw ends" are in that context. Adam, London, UK http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_782.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_782.shtml Your Letters Fri, 30 Oct 2009 17:56:41 +0000 If younger brides make for a happy marriage, then these two must surely be in for a fantastic time.Adam, London, UK Regarding Michael Caine's missing Google hits, are you sure you don't have Google safe search turned on? I would have sent a postcard, but apparently there's a strike on.Cat, Leeds Does anyone want to do my degree for me please? It's hard.Aaron, Bath (formerly of Reading), UK In this story: "The shape of the wood is also easy to explain" says Hilary, "It's the way the trees are grown that make it look heart-shaped". Brilliant, Holmes. Ken, Chelmsford Re "Who can't give blood?", I've lived in France continuously since 1986, but am banned from giving blood here because of BSE. Up until about seven years ago, the French were happy to have me as a blood donor, but the BSE crisis in the UK made them think again, and some perception that I might have been a beef junkie (never!) has made them ban all Brits from giving blood. Jacquie, France Some more incisive research from the department of the bleedin' obvious then! James Dawkins, London That makes two then.Bob Draper, Bath, UK http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_781.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_781.shtml Your Letters Thu, 29 Oct 2009 15:00:04 +0000 Who is banned from giving blood? I was a regular donor in the UK, but I am not allowed to give blood in NZ because I lived in Britain for more than six months. Apparently I might be a mad cow. Margaret, Christchurch, NZ Here in Denmark, being British (or at least having lived in Britain during the mad cow disease era) is enough to have you barred from giving blood. Though no doubt, any Danes requiring blood while in the UK will be happy enough to accept. I was irrationally offended by their refusal to have mine the other week. Ruth Helen, Copenhagen, Denmark In the US, there are restrictions placed on donors: Cannot donate if spent time that adds up to three months or more in the UK from 1980-1996 (England, N Ireland, Scotland, Wales, Isle of Man, Channel Islands, Gibraltar, Falkland Islands) Or if spent time that adds up to five years or more in European countries since 1980 (including time spent in the UK during 1980-1996). My blood type is O- and I would love to be able to donate, but because I lived in London for 10 years between 1987 and 1997, cannot. Jennifer Rowe, San Diego, US "These magic moments are pure secret" - not any more, Madame, courtesy of la BBC. Mark, Reading, UK The BBC now seems to be using the prefix "ex" (e.g. ex-president), where previously the word "former" would have been used. Has a new language policy been adopted? More importantly, can any Monitorites/fellow pedants clarify which is grammatically (or stylistically) correct? Laura, Cardiff Did the smugglers not note the not so subtle warning on the ship that their enterprise might not be such a good idea? (Six freed in cigarette ship probe) Simon, Colchester, UK "It's me, bear, it's me" (Wednesday's Quote of the Day): Does he really know what he's doing, or is he just ursine about? Rob Falconer, Llandough, Wales OMG a rival! You're still the best though... Karen, Cardiff Monitor note: Paper Monitor passes on its thanks. Yes Infense (Tuesday letters), if your employer has put up decorations they are permitting you to do nothing. Laura, Ipswich Infense, another group on the same floor as me at work have had a miniature Christmas tree up for at least the past 18 months. I can see it from my desk as I type. Given your theory of decorations = no work/holiday mode, it may explain why their outputs are always so low. Katherine, Canberra, Australia So, the old Routemaster unit of measurement is back on the Letters Page (Tanya K's Tuesday letter). Has anyone else noticed the new money metric out there - "you could save enough money to get 2 tickets to a European away game". When did this start happening? And why weren't we told? Vicki, London Sorry Sam (Tuesday letters), there was no 1LO. 2LO's predecessor was 2MT. The LO probably stood for London and MT for Marconi Telegraph. The 2 probably just indicated the frequency band used for broadcasting. David , Newcastle, UK I was in the meeting room at 15:00 BST yesterday, which is really inconvenient for me. Where the hell was everybody else? Titus A Newt, Perth, Australia Monitor note: Hate to break this to you, Titus... http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_780.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_780.shtml Your Letters Wed, 28 Oct 2009 16:28:51 +0000 I think that the original Drunk Girl is a superior image because she is obviously drunk - she's passed out. The new Drunk Girl is merely an exhibitionist. She could even be posing. Or perhaps her knicker elastic has broken.Jo Edkins, Cambridge,UK Was it just me that thought that in the drunker girl picture she was skateboarding?Alan, Edinburgh I am, like most people living in urban areas, out at work in the daytime. It makes no difference what time the post comes, as long as it's before I get home.Lee, Birmingham For those of you still mourning the loss of the Routemaster as a unit of measurement, this morning's Metro uses an intriguing new London unit that is sure to catch on. Apparently, a new report about the tube says that "the number of passengers commuting in conditions equivalent to four or more people in a phone box will double to half a million by 2026 without continued modernisation". But the real question - are they talking about red phone boxes or the new type? We should be told.Tanya K, Reading I think it's pretty well-known that 2LO was the BBC's original radio call sign, and aparrently it wasn't the first, which leads me to conclude that 1LO also existed. If so, what was 1LO used for and by whom?Sam Chapman, Reading Advice needed. My employer has put up Christmas decorations. Does this mean I can slide into festive/no work mode? Or should I wait until 1 December? Infense, Adelaide, Australia http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_779.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_779.shtml Your Letters Tue, 27 Oct 2009 15:51:45 +0000 Can anyone tell me why the NHS feels the need to advertise? Surely if you're ill you have no choice but to use them? Our local hospital just spent yet another £4,000 on advertising in our local paper - WHY??Lesley McLaren, Chester, England Regarding two million people descended from Confucious I can go one better... two million and one from his dad. Martin Comer, London UK Unless her knees are turned back-to-front, "Drunk Girl" isn't prostrate (Paper Monitor, Monday): she is supine. The Pedant , London Re: 10 things number 10... are we talking five past three? Ten past?Basil Long, Nottingham Dan from Derby (Friday's letters): You fool! That's just what they want you to think! Don't you realise that the entire modus operandi of HMRC is to overcharge by just a few pounds here and there so that people will think that it's not worth the trouble of claiming it back?Adam, London, UK Another day, another BBC News story about Twitter. Careful, Aunty Beeb, people might start making comparisons with the Daily Express and Princess Diana...Darren, London Re: Cup Cakes. Bring back the Kunzle cake (please!!) - one happy childhood memory that I'd love to be able to revisit.John E, Southampton, U.K. Texican? Wouldn't that be... Texmex food?Sarah, London The Beautiful People website (Monday's Quote) is a terrific idea. I'll post a picture of a handsome hunk with flowing coiffeured locks and a rippling muscled torso, only to find that the 'partner of my dreams' has been similarly duplicitous and her picture of a radiant, toned and lively Ms Perfect was sent in by a seventy year old overweight asthmatic granny with a triple, hairy, chin and dentures. What fun! What an essential service!Mark, Reading http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_778.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_778.shtml Your Letters Mon, 26 Oct 2009 15:26:50 +0000 Re 1.5m pensioners 'overpaying tax': 1.5m people paying £250m over 8-9 years works out at just over £1.50 a month. Scandalous!Dan, Derby Surely we're not the ONLY country on "Portuguese" time.Dan, Cambridge "It's not clear what caused the attack". Really? Not clear? Lord help us all.Eric, Bristol Surely drunk girl and drunk girl II are one and the same, just pictured at different stages of inebriation on different evenings? The only difference seems to be boots for DG and shoes for DGII.Boots, Epsom Martin (Thursday's letters), yes I have. That's how we roll.Aaron Boardley, Bath (formerly of Reading), UK In the weekly quiz I got 7/7 last week and 0/7 this week - what does this say about me?EC, London Oooh, all this talk of wine gums has given me a massive craving...Liz, Belfast http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_777.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_777.shtml Your Letters Fri, 23 Oct 2009 15:47:02 +0000 "Postmen/women voted for a strike because Royal Mail management over years have not invested in new frontline delivery equipment" bemoans "postman" of Coventry on Have Your Say. What, like robotic hands?Ben Merritt, Sheffield, England "Bright yellow warning signs alert you to wayward kangaroos, wombats and even kangaroos on the way." Kangaroos, and even kangaroos, eh? Additional bonus point: referring to the someone as the 'driving force' behind the golf course's creation. HS, Cambridge Dr David Whitehouse, a space scientist and author: "I thought this was a way, not only to get in touch between astronauts and ordinary people, but to get down with the kids. "Down with the kids?" Oh dear lord, has anyone actually said that since the late sixties?Martin, Bristol, UK But, they're not blue.Jude, Melbourne, Australia Can I just say that whoever titled this particular article has provided me with enough poetic inspiration for the next three years? However, the story in itself was a bit disappointing.Kailyn, Kentucky, USA As amazing as the photo is, I was expecting something a bit more dramatic after reading the headline.Jen, Oxford, UK It may be boring but it's not bad for your teeth!Ralph, Cumbria Re: Paper Monitor. How dare they say the girl in a Cardiff street is knickerless! It can get very cold of an evening in the Welsh capital, so she has clearly decided to wear two pairs, and is in the process of changing her mind.Rob, Not too near Cardiff She has defected!M. Ross, Lancaster, UK http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_776.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_776.shtml Your Letters Thu, 22 Oct 2009 15:58:49 +0000 Oh no! Someone has made an ent into a door!Ralph, Cumbria We've had Drunk Girl, but what about Facebook Eye, used wherever social networking is mentioned?PB, London More nanny state madness. So now they're expecting us to eat *cheese*? With *wine*?Sue, London UB40 'bored' of Red Red Wine song. Now they know how most music fans feel.Dave Godfrey, Swindon, UK Escalator etiquette - Woe betide any brave soul or misguided tourist who stands on the left on an escalator in the Munich U-bahn system. A Teutonic bark along the lines of "rechts stehen, links gehen" normally ensues.Owain Williams, Regensburg Oh come on - with their resources they must be able to afford a whole Porsche.JennyT, NY Brit Facebook posting of the day: The reason we drive on the left but stand on the right of Tube escalators dates back to the times when people carried swords. In the Middle Ages you kept to the left for the simple reason that you wanted to make sure that a stranger passed on the right so you could go for your sword in case he proved unfriendly. Therefore, people stand on the right of the Tube escalators to keep out of the way of all these crazed beweaponed gentlepeople wielding pointy swords. I'm sure I had a point to make but I've confused myself. Keira Vallejo http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_775.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_775.shtml Your Letters Wed, 21 Oct 2009 16:24:47 +0000 I take it I missed the meeting then? AndyS, Blackpool Monitor note: Not to worry, you can catch up here. Out of Office AutoReply: Strategy Proposals for identifying optimum timings for workplace symposia. I am out of the office now until 7:30am 21st October 2009. For any urgent enquiries, please leave a message on the letters page. Thank You. Andrew, Malvern, UK I gather that the Canadian government tried to drag back the "work-life balance" by instituting, under normal working conditions, the 4-5-6 system. No major meetings after 4pm; most staff to have left at 5pm; all staff to have left by 6pm (allowing for crises and so on). Enquiries of friends and colleagues as to whether this works has brought very un-Canadian harrumphing to the fore. Phil McCarty, London, UK Ha ha! Keith Harris and Overell. Do I win a prize? Graeme, Dundee, Scotland Nice to see the headline writers giving their honest opinion of this story. Suzy, Portsmouth Big TV screens? Along with leather sofas and plate glassing the back of the house... all useful clues to a way of life one might want to avoid. Mary Woodward, St Albans You speak absolute tosh, Mr Tomlinson (Tuesday's Quote of the Day) some of the best funerals I have attended were totally atheist in character. Might I suggest that you decline to attend funerals where the deceased was not a believer and point the grieving relatives in the direction of a humanist celebrant. Alan Addison, Glasgow, UK Facebook comment of the day: Presumably Mr Tomlinson's there because he was asked to be. As far as I know vicars don't randomly turn up to funerals but are asked to take them by funeral directors and/or families. The problem may be with finding people who aren't ministers of religion to conduct secular services, leading to a problem of the leader and the participants having different ideas about what a funeral is for. Mel Eyeons If Paper Monitor always feels as though he/she/it has the best job in the world... is that not starting to get a little "samey"? Basil Long, Nottingham My entry for this week's Caption Competition will be "No, I said TWO sugars". Can you make sure the photo fits this time? Thanks. Lee Pike, Auckland, New Zealand http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_774.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_774.shtml Your Letters Tue, 20 Oct 2009 16:01:53 +0000 Robyn (Friday letters), she hasn't gone missing, she was just hungover and unavailable after this on Thursday.Bas, London Robyn, that girl isn't drunk yet, but she is preparing for the role ever since the other one got fired for NOT drinking on the job.Martin Hollywood, Luxembourg I was going to write a long and very complicated reply to Steve in Sheffield's letter (Friday letters) regarding the forward slash discussion, but then realised I'd only be boring everyone, including myself. Besides, he's right.PB, London Re "[Network Rail] said its policy of managing vegetation by tracks means the issue of fallen leaves is no longer a news story." So why is BBC News reporting on something that is not a news story?Lester Mak, London, UK If we are to have a law banning people from "picking on" fat people will there be similar laws to protect those with ginger hair, those with glasses, those with large noses etc? If not I don't see this is particularly fair, do you?Lucy P, Ashford, Kent Somebody called Gordon trying to save the world from extreme weather conditions - I'm sure I've come across this story somewhere before... Jim, Crowborough Has nominative determinism become so passe among Magazine letter writers that it was overlooked in Emma's letter about the Queen, the Balloon Boy and the castle?David, Jerusalem Facebook comment of the day: John Henderson - You can already get pdf books using any given torrent site. Although the legal versions have a natural edge - ever tried to read a long book as a pdf? It's not nice. http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_773.shtml http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/2009/10/your_letters_773.shtml Your Letters Mon, 19 Oct 2009 15:17:41 +0000