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"Legal high made me run naked in Tesco".
Reading that Metro headline, it's hard not to feel a sense of awe. Great headlines happen with reasonable regularity, take this one from the BBC, but Paper Monitor still feels the hairs go up on the back of the neck every time it sees one.
The story itself doesn't disappoint. A 19-year-old woman took something called Benzo or Benzo Fury and walked naked through the supermarket in Bourne, Lincolnshire.
Her own words are powerful.
"I was parading through the Tesco aisles like a catwalk diva. I was a disgrace. I had chewed a pen so it looked like I had black teeth and I had drawings all over my body."
The Daily Mail is also captivated by the story, and believes its readers would like to see several pictures of the woman in question. Several large pictures.
A less pictorial version can be found in the Rutland and Stamford Mercury, but it's enjoyable for the dead pan quotes from the defence lawyer.
This will be no doubt be on the humourous news aggregator Fark by the end of the day.