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Paper Monitor

11:51 UK time, Wednesday, 26 October 2011

A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.

More ruminations about cheese in the papers. And not only in the wake of Nicolas Sarkozy's ungallant remark that German Chancellor Angela Merkel "said she's on a diet and then helps herself to a second helping of cheese".

A report has just been published that shows upmarket cheeses are the most popular item for shoplifters. The Independent laments the lack of an Atkins-style, cheese-only weight loss diet and anticipates a revolutionary Eat Brie, Lose Pounds Diet book - courtesy of Angela Merkel.

In the Times cheese maker and Blur bassist Alex James goes so far as branding cheese theft as the worst kind of crime "like swearing in church or mugging a nun". Hmmm, not sure Paper Monitor - a self-confessed cheese lover - agrees.

On a more literary note there's lots of talk around the "Shakespearian thriller" Anonymous which hands authorship of the Bard's plays to Edward de Vere, 17th Earl of Oxford.

There is a whole industry devoted to trying to prove that somebody else wrote Shakespeare's plays. But in defence of the Bard the Telegraph notes the trouble with Shakespeare author conspiracies is that they usually know "very little about the Elizabethan and Jacobean theatre" and that Hollywood directors "don't really care".

The Independent asserts that arguments from Shakespeare doubters "boil down to the idea that an ordinary bloke from the Mildlands couldn't have written anything beautiful". How very rude of such disbelievers. Roy Wood, Noddy Holder, Ozzy Osbourne... do you need anymore evidence that the area is a hotbed of wordsmiths?

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