A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
The expenses crisis has reached Day 23, proclaims its architect, the Daily Telegraph, gleefully, as it churns out another eight (broadsheet) pages on the subject.
But within its acres of coverage, the paper makes no mention of the fact that one of the MPs currently caught up in the storm, Julie Kirkbride, was its political correspondent for four years.
Journalism, then politics. Two professions held in pretty low esteem by the public, which would suggest Mrs Kirkbride is certainly not seeking popularity in her choice of careers. Next up, estate agent?
The Sun uses the expenses saga to cheekily promote its price-war with the Star.
"THIS PAPER COSTS JUST 20P... MPs ARE ON THE TAKE... WE ARE ON THE GIVE"
(Well, it is for those in and around London at least.)
To which the Star responds: "THIS PAPER COSTS JUST 20P - TWICE AS MUCH FUN AS THE SUN"
Frugal is not a word often used to describe the weddings of professional footballers. The nuptials of David Beckham, Ashley Cole and Wayne Rooney are estimated to have cost a total of £6m.
In a break with this lavish English tradition, reported in the Daily Mirror, Liverpool's Spain striker Fernando Torres wed his childhood sweetheart in a town hall ceremony with just TWO guests.
For those unfamiliar with The Soccer, Torres is quite good.
And he now earns £110,000-a-week.
UPDATE: Paper Monitor's eye was drawn yesterday to an advertisement of questionable taste by the Evening Standard, a local London paper, which is using an image from the G20 protests to help shift copies. It seems one blogger, at least, was similarly unnerved by the marketing tactic.