A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
After yesterday's Guardian morphing with Hello! magazine, whatever will today bring? It is Prince Charles's 60th, and whose coverage will most closely mirror that of a glossy society magazine?
At first glance, the Daily Telegraph looks to be in the running, devoting a large portion of its front page to his louche-looking official birthday photo. But inside there is very little else. The couple divorcing over Second Life cheating gets more words and bigger pictures.
The Guardian, meanwhile, has the portrait - complete with a cut-out-and-keep guide to all that hardware on Charles's chest.
A timeline of his life and times - complete with topless polo pic.
Pull-quotes of his best lines - including that infamous assessment of the BBC's royal correspondent, "I can't bear that man".
And not one but two extensive think pieces.
The Daily Mail is far more interested in whether John Cleese's shiner at the royal show was real or fake, but later in the paper there's a Mac cartoon in honour of the big day.
Any Independent reader wishing to doff a cap in honour of the royal birthday has to wait until page 17, where a mere handful of words mark the occasion, alongside briefs such as Hendrix's drummer dying and something about shrimps.
And the Daily Express, champion of Diana (although some may not see it that way), runs a big feature on past heirs awaiting their turn on the throne.
"On his 60th birthday, Prince Charles today becomes the longest serving and possibly most inspiring Prince of Wales, a title that has seen its share of braggarts, playboys and wastrels."
Is this what is known as faint praise?