Caption Competition

13:15 UK time, Friday, 5 September 2008

Winning entries in the caption competition.

This week, three people suspended in sleeping bags nailed to a wall at London's Victoria station to promote the launch of a herbal sleep remedy.

The competition is now closed. Full rules can be seen here [PDF].

Thanks to all who entered. The prize of a small amount of kudos to the following:

6. nigelmccc
"Itching powder? You're... Oh, no..."

5. Candace9839
Heathrow Terminal 5 unveils its new lounge area.

4. pinkfloydareace
You want to know why there are always three tickets booths unmanned every day? Here's the answer.

3. nick_fowler
"Passengers are advised to be on the lookout for some very large spiders."

2. JamesWTT
After being confronted by the evidence, Ripley headed off to find her flamethrower.

1. Mozza3322
Small, one-bed dwellings, excellent commuter links.

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Comments

1. At 12:26pm on 04 Sep 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
That's the last time I ask your mate to 'put me up for the night!'

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2. At 12:26pm on 04 Sep 2008, purpleprole wrote:
"Ok, next time YOU book the hotel then"

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3. At 12:27pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
With the introduction of Virgin’s new timetable, Harry and his mates were taking no chances

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4. At 12:28pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
Hey, Joe, weren't we were lucky to get this upgrade from a Travelodge?

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5. At 12:29pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
I think I've got it jammed in the zip again, Derek

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6. At 12:29pm on 04 Sep 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
What does the Very Hungry Catepillar do when his mates sleep over? He puts them up for the night.

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7. At 12:31pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
Passengers are advised to be on the lookout for some very large spiders

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8. At 12:32pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
Oh no, not another hold-up on the line?

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9. At 12:32pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Heathrow Terminal 5 unveils its new lounge area

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10. At 12:32pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
Derek and his chums decided to go to London for the weekend and get plastered

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11. At 12:33pm on 04 Sep 2008, SundayParkGeorge wrote:
The Body Shop finally launches a product line that matches the company name.

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12. At 12:34pm on 04 Sep 2008, purpleprole wrote:
The annual London sack race is interrupted by a curiously placed velcro wall.

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13. At 12:34pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
The three were later arrested for loitering without tent

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14. At 12:35pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
"I told you to go before they nailed us up here."

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15. At 12:35pm on 04 Sep 2008, bennym22 wrote:
the first AGM of the National Institute of Narcileptic Escapologists seeks six further members

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16. At 12:35pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
There we were, sleeping in a tent in New Orleans, and the next thing we knew ...

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17. At 12:36pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
"Line on the left, one cocoon each."

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18. At 12:36pm on 04 Sep 2008, sarahtrieste wrote:
Just hanging out.

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19. At 12:36pm on 04 Sep 2008, CoasterCowboy wrote:
The credit crunch was forcing the makers of Big Brother to look at alternatives to building a new house.

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20. At 12:37pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
The Fat Controller exacted a drastic punishment on anybody found sleeping rough

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21. At 12:37pm on 04 Sep 2008, penny-farthing wrote:
Un-animated suspension.

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22. At 12:38pm on 04 Sep 2008, CairnTerrier wrote:
What are you doing, you idiots, I wanted a four poster bed - not a four-bedded poster!

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23. At 12:38pm on 04 Sep 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Oh no, not another fly-on-the-wall documentary about London commuters?

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24. At 12:38pm on 04 Sep 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
Well that's the last time I make fun of the Scout movement.

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25. At 12:38pm on 04 Sep 2008, gregss100x wrote:
In a new twist on "I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here" the Witchetty grubs are forced to eat the contestants.

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26. At 12:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
"Well, it's better than the sandcastle you booked."

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27. At 12:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, sarahtrieste wrote:
Getting high on herbs.

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28. At 12:40pm on 04 Sep 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
The porters at the mainline London termini are usually a stuck-up lot

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29. At 12:41pm on 04 Sep 2008, penny-farthing wrote:
Passengers await the train to their dormitory town.

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30. At 12:41pm on 04 Sep 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Well, if you work for Boris Johnson, you have to start early in the morning

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31. At 12:41pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
"Got a light?"

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32. At 12:41pm on 04 Sep 2008, sarahtrieste wrote:
Railway sleepers.

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33. At 12:42pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
This is the biggest flat we could afford.

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34. At 12:42pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
Are you sure these Arthur Daly brand wall beds are the coming thing?

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35. At 12:43pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
I'm canceling my application to be an astronaut!

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36. At 12:45pm on 04 Sep 2008, stumo99 wrote:
The bodies of the three that jumped the barriers were hung on the wall by police as a warning to all others who haven't got the message yet.

Or if we are going with the standard of caption that is often chosen;

Gosh shouldn't those people be on the floor, and with a tent on top, then this scenario would be socially acceptable.

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37. At 12:45pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
I don't want to alarm you, but there's a dog with a full bladder approaching.

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38. At 12:46pm on 04 Sep 2008, penny-farthing wrote:
Next stop: Lunaticville

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39. At 12:46pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
So you're part of a Tracey Emin! It could be worse! It might have been a Damien Hirst!

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40. At 12:47pm on 04 Sep 2008, DDsurrey wrote:
Hi mum, I hanging arround with an old bag at the station

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41. At 12:47pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
And you say the 1973 Woody Allen film had TWO sequels?

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42. At 12:48pm on 04 Sep 2008, JamesWTT wrote:
After being confronted by the evidence, Ripley headed off to find her flamethrower

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43. At 12:48pm on 04 Sep 2008, rogueslr wrote:
'Go green' he said, 'think of our carbon footprint' he said, 'put your feet up' he said. Well I say 'stuff that, next year it's Torremolinos'.

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44. At 12:48pm on 04 Sep 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
The next time I'll book the sleeper to Paris

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45. At 12:48pm on 04 Sep 2008, Kipson wrote:
Stuck-up gits.

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46. At 12:48pm on 04 Sep 2008, Kipson wrote:
What we need is an off-the-wall idea.

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47. At 12:50pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
Our tickets bought us the berth, the bed...Everything except a place on the train.

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48. At 12:50pm on 04 Sep 2008, rogueslr wrote:
Well I've done Rep mostly, so when my agent said he'd get me on a billboard in London I jumped at the chance.

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49. At 12:50pm on 04 Sep 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
The British Museum is still trying to trace the missing exhibit for their new Egyptian display

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50. At 12:50pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
This work-life balance thing takes a bit of working out, doesn't it?

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51. At 12:50pm on 04 Sep 2008, largeProp wrote:
Though Tom and Bill kept there cool, Gerald's excitement at the pretty lady was there for all to see.

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52. At 12:50pm on 04 Sep 2008, Kipson wrote:
No, I'm not happy, you should see where they've put the clothes hook.

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53. At 12:52pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
I'm here to tell you that you've just received an invite to a come-as-you-are party.

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54. At 12:52pm on 04 Sep 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Still, they're a lot more active than most railway porters

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55. At 12:52pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
Break dancing, anyone?

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56. At 12:53pm on 04 Sep 2008, Kipson wrote:
Yes, we're all in favour of hanging.

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57. At 12:53pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
Did you use bad grammar or post your comment in the "Letters" form?

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58. At 12:54pm on 04 Sep 2008, purpleprole wrote:
Preparations get underway for London's scaled-down opening ceremony.

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59. At 12:54pm on 04 Sep 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Next time we're in court, make certain we don't get Judge Jeffreys

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60. At 12:55pm on 04 Sep 2008, modernstonethrower wrote:
And on the third day they rose again.

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61. At 12:56pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
Itching powder? You're...Oh, no...

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62. At 12:56pm on 04 Sep 2008, rogueslr wrote:
I'm not saying where that bloke giving out the Metro stuck it, but it don't 'alf make your eyes water.

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63. At 12:56pm on 04 Sep 2008, iwishidthoughtofthat wrote:
London Victoria unveils it's new herbaceous boarders

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64. At 12:58pm on 04 Sep 2008, angelofboox wrote:
London's 2012 athletes begin preparing to win the Gold Medal for the 200m butterfly.

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65. At 12:59pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Never refuse to pay the bill in an Italian restaurant - I've even got a horse's head in here with me

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66. At 1:00pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Well I reckon we're taking practising safe sex too far

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67. At 1:00pm on 04 Sep 2008, penny-farthing wrote:
Lost baggage

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68. At 1:01pm on 04 Sep 2008, MisterForbes wrote:
Cosy, desirable, three bedroom, Central London property, close to the station. A snip at only £250,000...

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69. At 1:01pm on 04 Sep 2008, tiptopgossipgirl wrote:
Oh no that's my train, I can't believe I slept in. Now how do I get down from here?

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70. At 1:01pm on 04 Sep 2008, stigmondo wrote:
The Government's new plan to help first time buyers wasn't quite as good as it first appeared..

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71. At 1:02pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
But George, Harrod's sale was last month!

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72. At 1:03pm on 04 Sep 2008, campaign1 wrote:
'Cocoon' - the director?s cut

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73. At 1:03pm on 04 Sep 2008, DavidDeeMoz wrote:
Thermos? Check! Sandwiches? Check! Rope ladder? Er, rope ladder?

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74. At 1:03pm on 04 Sep 2008, campaign1 wrote:
'Cocoon' - the director's cut

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75. At 1:03pm on 04 Sep 2008, Hellagooduk wrote:
Tired of yet more train delays, commuters figured they'd be quicker cocooning themselves and growing wings to get to work.

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76. At 1:04pm on 04 Sep 2008, livinginateapot wrote:
Environmental protest against the building of Victoria station enters its 147th year.

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77. At 1:05pm on 04 Sep 2008, rogueslr wrote:
And this is our new creche facility for busy women to drop off their husbands so that they can shop in peace.

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78. At 1:06pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
This new super-prison isn't very super, is it?

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79. At 1:06pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
"Found? In a sleeping-bag?" exclaimed Lady Bracknell.

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80. At 1:07pm on 04 Sep 2008, robindover wrote:
Roman punishments are a lot more humane these days

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81. At 1:07pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Actually, my name IS Bill Stickers

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82. At 1:09pm on 04 Sep 2008, iwishidthoughtofthat wrote:
There were three in the bed and the little one said 'What the ****?!'

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83. At 1:09pm on 04 Sep 2008, robindover wrote:
A radical solution to the housing crisis

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84. At 1:09pm on 04 Sep 2008, countrysidez wrote:
Don't you get board hanging around for a train?

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85. At 1:10pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
And we guarantee there'll be no more sleepwalking from your wife when she's in this, Macbeth.

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86. At 1:10pm on 04 Sep 2008, SundayParkGeorge wrote:
Due to overrunning engineering works, Network Rail demonstrate the recommended passenger outfits for the Brighton line.

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87. At 1:10pm on 04 Sep 2008, dbu13mr wrote:
The crucifixion scene in the new version of MP's Life of Brian really was not the same since the new Health and Safety measures had been implemented.

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88. At 1:10pm on 04 Sep 2008, LaurenceLane wrote:
So, I'm supposed to be the groom, you're my best man and that's gonna be my new mother in law? Now that's what I call a stag party!

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89. At 1:10pm on 04 Sep 2008, robindover wrote:
Shrek's visit to London went well, although he did sneeze a lot.

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90. At 1:11pm on 04 Sep 2008, trigg_27 wrote:
Network Rail unveils the latest scheme to reduce overcrowding

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91. At 1:11pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
If Tracy Emin can win with an unmade bed...

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92. At 1:12pm on 04 Sep 2008, Northern_Simon wrote:
In an effort to reduce the impact of delays, the new Hibernation Class is launched.

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93. At 1:12pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
So, your christian name is Uni, Mr Bond?

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94. At 1:12pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
If Tracey Emin can win with an unmade bed...

(spelling corrected)

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95. At 1:13pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Invasion of the Body Shop Snatchers

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96. At 1:13pm on 04 Sep 2008, TimboK wrote:
New 'Boil in the bag' range for cannibals launched.

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97. At 1:14pm on 04 Sep 2008, henrytheturkey wrote:
When we told the job centre we hung around all day, they found us the perfect job.

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98. At 1:16pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
At least we're not living above our station, Derek

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99. At 1:16pm on 04 Sep 2008, SundayParkGeorge wrote:
After a serendipitous discovery when spilling their night-time drinks, it was clear that the herbal remedy would also sell well in the superglue market.

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100. At 1:17pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
I said 'threesome', not a 'treesome'

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101. At 1:18pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Herbage a trois

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102. At 1:19pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Nobody told me that the new herbal sleep remedy may cause diarrhoea

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103. At 1:20pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
'Ere Derek, I never realised a bad night's sleep could be a terminal illlness

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104. At 1:20pm on 04 Sep 2008, LaurenceLane wrote:
For the last bloody time, will stop singing 'We're Walking in the Air!'

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105. At 1:20pm on 04 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
"Yeah, it's great to find a job at last...I've been sitting at home doing nothing for months."

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106. At 1:20pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Yeah, I'm having a herbal time too

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107. At 1:22pm on 04 Sep 2008, henrytheturkey wrote:
Its getting beyond a joke now. September 4th and they're already hanging the Christmas decorations.

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108. At 1:23pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
At least the British Transport Police gave us a suspended sentence

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109. At 1:25pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Network Rail found that, by hanging three smelly old tramps in one corner of Victoria Station, the rest of the station remained refreshingly fly-free

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110. At 1:25pm on 04 Sep 2008, oshanter wrote:
Mount Calvary revisited by the Politically Correct Brigade

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111. At 1:27pm on 04 Sep 2008, LaurenceLane wrote:
Next time, get 'em to nail the sleeping bags to the wall before we get into them.

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112. At 1:28pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
We are not amused

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113. At 1:29pm on 04 Sep 2008, henrytheturkey wrote:
Some people will do anything for a job, look at here she's dressed in a suit.

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114. At 1:30pm on 04 Sep 2008, honesthulley wrote:
"Pouch Potatoes."

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115. At 1:30pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
On the other side of the Station, Burke and Hare had a display to advertise their company, "The Body Parts Shop"

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116. At 1:31pm on 04 Sep 2008, Northern_Simon wrote:
The bag-people argued passionately that it would actually NOT be ‘a bit of a laugh’ to push their wall over.

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117. At 1:31pm on 04 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
Tête à terre.

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118. At 1:31pm on 04 Sep 2008, henrytheturkey wrote:
Some people will do anything for a job, look at her she's dressed in a suit.

(spelling correction)

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119. At 1:33pm on 04 Sep 2008, LaurenceLane wrote:
Care in the Community were having difficulties finding accommodation for the homeless in an increasingly crowded London.

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120. At 1:35pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
Mummies are unearthed by archaeologists near Toot-in-Kahmon

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121. At 1:36pm on 04 Sep 2008, henrytheturkey wrote:
The BBC finally takes notice of the critisism that they are spending to much on travel and accommodation.

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122. At 1:36pm on 04 Sep 2008, nerdsunited wrote:
The Body Shop's recyclable 'Body Bag' proves a hit with customers.

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123. At 1:36pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
Well, Derek, I haven't been able to sleep a wink, worrying about whether that sign should read night's or nights'

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124. At 1:37pm on 04 Sep 2008, grucacious wrote:
Radio One's binge drinking experiment ended predictably

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125. At 1:38pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
These stupid advertising stunts are driving me up the wall

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126. At 1:38pm on 04 Sep 2008, LaurenceLane wrote:
So this is Labour's new crime initiative, the reintroduction of the stocks but with a softer aspect.

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127. At 1:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
"Just wait til I see that uni careers adviser!"

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128. At 1:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, MatthieuV wrote:
British railway sleepers

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129. At 1:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, robindover wrote:
Greenpeace stag night turns bad

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130. At 1:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
I explained I'd lost my ticket, but would they listen?

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131. At 1:40pm on 04 Sep 2008, henrytheturkey wrote:
Well its better than last week, we were stuck to the side of a trailer in a field next to the M1.

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132. At 1:41pm on 04 Sep 2008, Ravonski wrote:
After a bitter false advertising case, the body shop is forced to live up to it's name.

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133. At 1:42pm on 04 Sep 2008, chocoholic1984 wrote:
Boy, these human statues just get lazier and lazier! No wonder they haven't raised any money.

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134. At 1:43pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
There were fears that Liverpool's new mechanical spider was making night-time forays into London's metropolis

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135. At 1:44pm on 04 Sep 2008, teazeldad wrote:
The anti PC brigade despaired over the new crucifixion rules in the Geneva convention

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136. At 1:46pm on 04 Sep 2008, LaurenceLane wrote:
I'm a method actor really, I studied all the greats before taking this part. Trevor Eve, Donald Sinden, Keanu Reeves...

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137. At 1:46pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
Commuters were worried when they heard that Preparation H was planning a display for the following week

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138. At 1:46pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
"Nah, this is the queue for Madonna tickets. Led Zeppelin is over there."

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139. At 1:48pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
The Post Office unveils its new environmentally-friendly collection boxes for London, the Home Counties and the rest of Britain

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140. At 1:48pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rossinny wrote:
The Victoria Lie-in

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141. At 1:49pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
Actually we all did have a good night's sleep. It's the only place in London where we don't suffer from hayfever.

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142. At 1:51pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
So we get the sleeping bag, then we get the sack?

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143. At 1:52pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
Teleworking? Not when you're doing this.

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144. At 1:53pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
This is the new type of identity parade.

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145. At 1:54pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
Job enrichment doesn't amount to much in this line of work, does it?

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146. At 1:55pm on 04 Sep 2008, Scoobiesue wrote:
As if Global Warming hasn't caused enough problems, now we have to put up with Butterflies the size of Jumbo Jets.

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147. At 1:56pm on 04 Sep 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
Lying? Is that Victoria or Westminster?

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148. At 1:56pm on 04 Sep 2008, gazardo wrote:
Despite the long haired wig , somehow everyone recognised Vick Airport wherever he went.

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149. At 1:56pm on 04 Sep 2008, redordead0 wrote:
This wasn't exactly what trading standards had in mind when they got in touch with The Body Shop.

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150. At 1:56pm on 04 Sep 2008, supasupermam wrote:
'Ah well - we're just hanging around at the station.....'

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151. At 1:58pm on 04 Sep 2008, Welshboyabroad wrote:
Okay madame, take your time. Can you identify the Catepilar who ate your prize Petunia's.

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152. At 1:58pm on 04 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
"Hey Sarah, is that you? When you said you were high up in advertising..."

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153. At 1:58pm on 04 Sep 2008, SideshowCecil wrote:
Banksy's latest street art was a lot more life like than usual.....

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154. At 1:58pm on 04 Sep 2008, PollySaxon wrote:
Dea realised that his amusing enactment of "10 Green Sleeping Bags" had a fundamental flaw.

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155. At 1:59pm on 04 Sep 2008, Snaggers wrote:
I know I said "All passengers are reminded to keep their bag's with them at all times.", but this is going to the extreme.

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156. At 1:59pm on 04 Sep 2008, needjamesd wrote:
Government unveils new form of crucifixion designed to combat terrorism

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157. At 2:00pm on 04 Sep 2008, PollySaxon wrote:
Des realised that his amusing enactment of "10 Green Sleeping Bags" had a fundamental flaw.

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158. At 2:00pm on 04 Sep 2008, jtotheglo wrote:
Do cocoons work for acne?!

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159. At 2:01pm on 04 Sep 2008, CoasterCowboy wrote:
London 2012: In order to bring the Olympics in on budget the new design for the athletes village went on display.

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160. At 2:01pm on 04 Sep 2008, MJR wrote:
You're all sacked!

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161. At 2:01pm on 04 Sep 2008, penny-farthing wrote:
When you suggested "menage-a-trois" this wasn't quite what I had in mind.

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162. At 2:02pm on 04 Sep 2008, jtotheglo wrote:
Well if you had a 16 hour connection you'd get into one of these bags too?!

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163. At 2:02pm on 04 Sep 2008, marrra wrote:
bruce (in the middle) hides his face as his girlfriend spots him

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164. At 2:03pm on 04 Sep 2008, youngWillz wrote:
Headline: Bags Of English Hold Interest Rate

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165. At 2:03pm on 04 Sep 2008, jtotheglo wrote:
New solution for hayfever suffering campers...

...train stations!

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166. At 2:03pm on 04 Sep 2008, nicklars wrote:
Controversial new punishments for youth offenders fail to capture the public's imagination.

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167. At 2:04pm on 04 Sep 2008, MJR wrote:
Ladies and Gentlemen, the nine oh five to Paris Gard du Nord has been delayed by damaged sleepers.

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168. At 2:06pm on 04 Sep 2008, youngWillz wrote:
The dream about the one-legged woman came true...

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169. At 2:06pm on 04 Sep 2008, MJR wrote:
I think it's a Banksy

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170. At 2:08pm on 04 Sep 2008, youngWillz wrote:
Woman thinks that "having a good night's sleep" does not involve pushing up daisies...

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171. At 2:09pm on 04 Sep 2008, LaurenceLane wrote:
So. this is what a fifteen quid brothel looks like in London.

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172. At 2:10pm on 04 Sep 2008, Spockter wrote:
So now we know what happened to the man from the 80's Solvite commercials.

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173. At 2:11pm on 04 Sep 2008, TouringMars wrote:
There's no messing about on the new series of Blind Date

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174. At 2:11pm on 04 Sep 2008, youngWillz wrote:
Body Shop get into bespoke chav wear

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175. At 2:11pm on 04 Sep 2008, Spockter wrote:
Eco-protestors try to stop the bulldozing of a billboard to make way for a new rail link

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176. At 2:13pm on 04 Sep 2008, KieranOx wrote:
"Side-effects? None, apart from the fact we've all gone off dolomades."

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177. At 2:14pm on 04 Sep 2008, Mozza3322 wrote:
Small, one bed dwellings, excellent commuter links.

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178. At 2:19pm on 04 Sep 2008, sternpaddler wrote:
....one for the Master and one for the Dame, and one for the little boy who lives down the lane.

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179. At 2:24pm on 04 Sep 2008, jennywrennyroodle wrote:
"Steve? Is that you behind there? Bloody hell I havn't seen you in donkeys years! How you doing mate?...errm so I see you've done well for yourself then!?"

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180. At 2:28pm on 04 Sep 2008, fionapar wrote:
Britain's levitation team practising for 2012

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181. At 2:29pm on 04 Sep 2008, fionapar wrote:
University of London admit to overcrowding in Halls of Residence

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182. At 2:29pm on 04 Sep 2008, RichTheGeek wrote:
Slugs are big this year !!

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183. At 2:32pm on 04 Sep 2008, fionapar wrote:
Answer; If not, try anything but this!

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184. At 2:33pm on 04 Sep 2008, jennywrennyroodle wrote:
"Damn I only need a wee don't I, do you think anyone will notice!?"

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185. At 2:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, kvturn wrote:
I don`t know about you, but I was rail-roaded into becoming a butterfly !

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186. At 2:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, redbyname wrote:
"Like, wow, man, I'm floating! And you say this stuff is just herbal?"

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187. At 2:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, youngWillz wrote:
Harry, Hermione and Ron decided to hide from Lord Voldemort amongst the Muggles in the centre of London...

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188. At 2:42pm on 04 Sep 2008, sacarkent wrote:
Rod, Jane and Freddy were not pleased to be woken from their long years of suspended animation in such a brusque fashion. What was worse, they clearly still weren't cool.

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189. At 2:43pm on 04 Sep 2008, fionapar wrote:
"Did either of you discuss our exit strategy with the boss?"

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190. At 2:43pm on 04 Sep 2008, youngWillz wrote:
Julian, Dick and Anne were already fast asleep when George returned from the vet's...

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191. At 2:43pm on 04 Sep 2008, WillyJohnson wrote:
Three more Business degree holders find gainful employment.

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192. At 2:45pm on 04 Sep 2008, robindover wrote:
And to think I turned down that Golf Sale gig for this....

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193. At 2:45pm on 04 Sep 2008, FLYINGNAKEDMOLERAT wrote:
Tracey Emin's remake of The Greatest Story Ever Told was not well received by London audiences ...

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194. At 2:47pm on 04 Sep 2008, one-size-fits-all wrote:
Trains delayed due to three damaged bogies

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195. At 2:49pm on 04 Sep 2008, fionapar wrote:
"Well lets hope it doesn't amount to three pees in a pod!"

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196. At 2:55pm on 04 Sep 2008, sternpaddler wrote:
Virgin n' the ridiculous

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197. At 2:56pm on 04 Sep 2008, archstinker wrote:

Boris Johnson launches new cheap housing scheme for inner London

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198. At 2:57pm on 04 Sep 2008, SurfingSharka wrote:
Only one to a sleeping bag, sir. We are Virgin Trains.

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199. At 2:59pm on 04 Sep 2008, omnipotent wrote:
The Body Shop demonstrates it's new low cost airlines and how they will pack in more passengers.

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200. At 3:01pm on 04 Sep 2008, richcinderella wrote:
"one day I'll be a beautiful butterfly"

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201. At 3:03pm on 04 Sep 2008, archstinker wrote:

"...then this alien came up, laid an egg in our mouths and caught the 12.15 to Newcross "

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202. At 3:04pm on 04 Sep 2008, omnipotent wrote:
Boris Johstone shows off the latest game for the 2012 Olympics. Synchronised Sleeping.

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203. At 3:07pm on 04 Sep 2008, youngWillz wrote:
Britney's impromptu London concert took a twist when she turned round to see what her backing singers were up to...

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204. At 3:07pm on 04 Sep 2008, grazvalentine wrote:
How bill stickers will be prosecuted.

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205. At 3:10pm on 04 Sep 2008, sternpaddler wrote:
Rent for three weeks - $153.00
Big Diaper brand sleeping bag - $84.00
Misunderstanding the "Good for 240 lbs" statement - Priceless.

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206. At 3:10pm on 04 Sep 2008, youngWillz wrote:
In a station beginning with Vic,
Three to a wall they did stick,
At night they had crept in,
But by dawn they had slept in,
Only to appear in a daft limerick!

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207. At 3:13pm on 04 Sep 2008, Tremorman wrote:
Rail workers found asleep, suspended.

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208. At 3:20pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
London's down-and-outs are now up-and-in

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209. At 3:24pm on 04 Sep 2008, Tremorman wrote:
Too many hangups as Human caterpillar cloned.

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210. At 3:28pm on 04 Sep 2008, Speedingmal wrote:
Let Sleeping Bags Lie

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211. At 3:37pm on 04 Sep 2008, carolineg wrote:
Carnivorous daisies abduct sleeping campers.

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212. At 3:37pm on 04 Sep 2008, Tremorman wrote:
Grubby hotel to be closed down

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213. At 3:45pm on 04 Sep 2008, CamberwellBeauty wrote:
I see King Tut and family out on holiday, again?

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214. At 3:46pm on 04 Sep 2008, speedbert wrote:
that can't work... just look at the bags under their eyes!

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215. At 3:49pm on 04 Sep 2008, Tremorman wrote:
New camping gear suitable for any T- rain

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216. At 3:53pm on 04 Sep 2008, MersonTuffers wrote:
The Victoria Station bag-ladies are getting hung-up on anything these days!

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217. At 3:55pm on 04 Sep 2008, Caddyshaq wrote:
Fans queuing for tickets to the new Spiderman musical take things a bit too far

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218. At 3:57pm on 04 Sep 2008, MersonTuffers wrote:
How is Lost Property gonna deal with this one?

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219. At 3:58pm on 04 Sep 2008, Stevedocklands wrote:
Surely they're not STILL doing those stupid wallpaper paste ads!

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220. At 4:01pm on 04 Sep 2008, DavidDeeMoz wrote:
"Nice levitation, boys, but your invisibility cloaks are rubbish. Now I want you on the Hogwarts Express in five minutes".

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221. At 4:01pm on 04 Sep 2008, MersonTuffers wrote:
"I've told the agency SO many times - Green just ISIN'T my colour but do they listen....."

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222. At 4:03pm on 04 Sep 2008, Stevedocklands wrote:
When they said we'd be hanging about in the Vic, I thought they meant we've have a part in Eastenders.

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223. At 4:03pm on 04 Sep 2008, Harb83 wrote:
The Human Chrysalis Display Team started their routine today with the flourishing fluttering finalé expected to be in a matter of weeks!

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224. At 4:05pm on 04 Sep 2008, ironpaulshaw wrote:
Fungus the Bogeyman's family loved hanging around old train stations

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225. At 4:10pm on 04 Sep 2008, beehaaken wrote:
As the goverment stalls on stamp duty the 3 stouges go to drastic measures to save money before buying a new house.

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226. At 4:11pm on 04 Sep 2008, Caddyshaq wrote:
Following the Red Lion's pneumonia epidemic of '03 the Health and Safety Executive called for changes to the 'dump sleeping drunks naked in the train station' tradition

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227. At 4:18pm on 04 Sep 2008, virtualindividual wrote:
Did you hear the one about the dyslexic agnostic insommniac? He hung around all night wondering if there was a dog!

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228. At 4:18pm on 04 Sep 2008, penny-farthing wrote:
This 3-person wall is ideal for your next getaway.....composed of lumber and plywood it weighs in at a manageable 140lbs, requires only a transit van to transport, and assembles easily in about 8 hours.

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229. At 4:19pm on 04 Sep 2008, dragonsp wrote:
The new species of caterpillar found in Victoria Station surprised the scientists.

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230. At 4:20pm on 04 Sep 2008, LaurenceLane wrote:
Now let me get this straight, you're all called Wayne.

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231. At 4:25pm on 04 Sep 2008, Ollybacon wrote:
"I win, told you I could find somewhere cheaper than an EasyHotel"

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232. At 4:28pm on 04 Sep 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
Green, bored and just hanging about in London, you must be Plaid Cymru politicians.

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233. At 4:28pm on 04 Sep 2008, ElleUSA wrote:
The credit crunch forces Kew Butterfly House to accept a bid from National Rail.

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234. At 4:37pm on 04 Sep 2008, locutus155 wrote:
The home secretary demostrates the new way of dealing with prison overcrowding.

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235. At 4:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
Hang on, those sausage rolls don't look very fresh

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236. At 4:42pm on 04 Sep 2008, fionapar wrote:
Latest ad for the space saving green burial service.

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237. At 4:51pm on 04 Sep 2008, virtualsam__ wrote:
Reclaim The Walls protesters admit flaw in plan.

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238. At 4:52pm on 04 Sep 2008, nicholasacurrie wrote:
The Body shop window had a more literal meaning these days.

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239. At 4:53pm on 04 Sep 2008, Caddyshaq wrote:
The Fare Dodger Punchbag increases ticket sales and raises staff fitness levels in one easy, low cost, solution

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240. At 4:58pm on 04 Sep 2008, sternpaddler wrote:
"John - the instructions for this Herbal Remedy stuff - the bit where it says "...steep in bag..." - can I see it for a moment please?"

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241. At 4:58pm on 04 Sep 2008, Caddyshaq wrote:
The new Virgin Rail complaints department was quite popular with commuters, although there were criticisms that it wasn't wheelchair friendly

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242. At 5:02pm on 04 Sep 2008, Caddyshaq wrote:
"Yes, I know it says The Body Shop, but No, the blonde isn't for sale!"

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243. At 5:06pm on 04 Sep 2008, ammason999 wrote:
Sorry, am I keeping you up?

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244. At 5:07pm on 04 Sep 2008, Caddyshaq wrote:
Zoom Airlines refute accusations that they did nothing to help stranded passengers

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245. At 5:13pm on 04 Sep 2008, Caddyshaq wrote:
The Real Hustle team comes up with yet another ingenious method to distract the unsuspecting marks

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246. At 5:15pm on 04 Sep 2008, DarthMac wrote:
You think this is bad? Next week we have to do one for haemorrhoid cream!

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247. At 5:18pm on 04 Sep 2008, Luke_L wrote:
Lisa had to admit that she was genuinely stumped by the latest incarnation of the Three Card Monty.

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248. At 5:23pm on 04 Sep 2008, Caddyshaq wrote:
"Hard Hats?"
"Check"
"Hi-vis jackets?"
"Check"
"Caterpillar boots?"
"ummm....was that boots or suits?"

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249. At 5:24pm on 04 Sep 2008, Magnum Carter wrote:
Michael Eavis employs a rathermore non-confrontational approach to removing festival stragglers

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250. At 5:25pm on 04 Sep 2008, DarthMac wrote:
Some First Class passengers are so stuck up!

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251. At 5:28pm on 04 Sep 2008, Magnum Carter wrote:
"oh yeah the new place is great. I can literally fall out of bed into the train"

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252. At 5:51pm on 04 Sep 2008, Rustikins wrote:
Stelios takes budget hotelling to the next level.

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253. At 5:55pm on 04 Sep 2008, danpearsonuk wrote:
In a new marketing strategy, The Body Shop has decided to cash in on its own name by selling actual bodies

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254. At 6:21pm on 04 Sep 2008, TheRealCatherineO wrote:
Did you switch the cooker off?

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255. At 6:25pm on 04 Sep 2008, BertieBogroll wrote:
Taking no further chances, Sarah Palin secures her remaining children until after the election.

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256. At 6:28pm on 04 Sep 2008, Dodie_James wrote:
"I'M ON A WALL.."

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257. At 6:44pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Dangers of internet travel planning #43

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258. At 6:57pm on 04 Sep 2008, sternpaddler wrote:
Although the advert in the Personnels said "well hung", she had this horrid suspicion that perhaps these people might not be true Nantucket material.

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259. At 7:03pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
"Anyone feel like another round of Kumbaya? I'm not really sleepy after washing down that herbal remedy with a double espresso."

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260. At 7:04pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
"Hey, someone's made off with the bicycles"

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261. At 7:14pm on 04 Sep 2008, penny-farthing wrote:
....three green occupied sleeping bags hanging on a wall..three green occupied sleeping bags hanging on a wall and if one green occupied sleeping bag should fall..........

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262. At 7:15pm on 04 Sep 2008, Dodie_James wrote:
The National Union of People-you-don't-want-to-sit-next-to-on-a-train held a strike over working conditions..

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263. At 7:27pm on 04 Sep 2008, MattFPi wrote:
Commuters are shocked by the new 'punishment fits the crime' measures introduced by Boris for those who fall asleep and miss their stop on London Transport.

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264. At 7:29pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
The BBC unleashes a savage retribution on caption competition entrants who have used the “Send us a letter” form on the right of the page

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265. At 7:32pm on 04 Sep 2008, penny-farthing wrote:
The consequences of the highly successful, product launch were unforeseen. After scores were admitted to emergency rooms the length of the country after trying the sleep remedy, the manufacturer was obliged to add,to the instructions, the line "Do not nail yourself to the wall while taking this product"

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266. At 7:34pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
It looks like another corn-on-the-cob advert for the Jolly Green Giant people

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267. At 7:35pm on 04 Sep 2008, MattFPi wrote:
No longer will you have to give up your seat when you need the toilet on a busy train - just buy one of the Body Shop's new inflatable seat reservers.

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268. At 7:37pm on 04 Sep 2008, sl4dude wrote:
Boris Johnson's new idea to deal with homeless...

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269. At 7:38pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
Boris Johnson institutes a new initiative in which Londoners are encouraged to recycle their old folk

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270. At 7:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, nick_fowler wrote:
Nowadays, you see adverts for that Soylent Green brand everywhere

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271. At 7:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, sl4dude wrote:
Next week on the caption competition, a picture of 3 butterflies nailed to a wall in London's Victoria station

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272. At 7:41pm on 04 Sep 2008, sl4dude wrote:
The Body Shop: Don't like your body? come and chose from our wide range of 3 high quality bodies in our London branch!

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273. At 7:42pm on 04 Sep 2008, sl4dude wrote:
Remember to eat your greens... NO! NOT THEM!

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274. At 7:44pm on 04 Sep 2008, sl4dude wrote:
Gordon Brown, David Cameron and Nick Clegg come out in support of the Monster Raving Looney party...

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275. At 7:44pm on 04 Sep 2008, GraemePuskas wrote:
Man in the middle: "If we keep jumping at the same time, I guarantee she'll join us..."

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276. At 7:45pm on 04 Sep 2008, sl4dude wrote:
Hey Dad... Isn't that you in that picture...

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277. At 7:46pm on 04 Sep 2008, sl4dude wrote:
Oh no... it happened again!

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278. At 7:46pm on 04 Sep 2008, sl4dude wrote:
Er, hello... I want to get out now... please! I really need the bathroom!

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279. At 7:48pm on 04 Sep 2008, sl4dude wrote:
Excuse me lady... I think i dropped my teddy

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280. At 7:48pm on 04 Sep 2008, sl4dude wrote:
I told you we should have looked around the house before we bought it

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281. At 7:50pm on 04 Sep 2008, sl4dude wrote:
When I said I wanted to go into advertising this was not what I had in mind...

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282. At 8:11pm on 04 Sep 2008, BertieBogroll wrote:
John Cleese realized that the line "If it wasn't for them being nailed to the wall they'd be pushing up the daisies" would probably sound funnier if he used a parrot and a perch instead.

(with thanks to sternpaddler)

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283. At 8:16pm on 04 Sep 2008, pinkfloydareace wrote:
'Did You Have A Good Night's Sleep?'

No said the 3 people that slept vertically

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284. At 8:17pm on 04 Sep 2008, pinkfloydareace wrote:
Trev, Steve and Will of the Natwest adverts have overstepped the mark for the latest advert

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285. At 8:18pm on 04 Sep 2008, pinkfloydareace wrote:
The Body Shop's idea for a hotel wasn't a good idea

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286. At 8:22pm on 04 Sep 2008, pinkfloydareace wrote:
Jeremy, Richard and James of Top Gear weren't impressed with the producers for their latest challenge

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287. At 8:23pm on 04 Sep 2008, TheRealCatherineO wrote:
Finding an agreeable ticket counter assistant is virtually impossible on a Monday morning.

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288. At 8:24pm on 04 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
"Ah, Friday at last...can't wait to have a nice lie in tomorrow"

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289. At 8:26pm on 04 Sep 2008, pinkfloydareace wrote:
You want to know why there are always 3 tickets booths unmanned everyday? Here's the answer!

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290. At 8:30pm on 04 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
" 'Scuse me, Madame...can yer spare £5 for a Skinny Latte?"

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291. At 8:31pm on 04 Sep 2008, thezeke wrote:
Gordon Brown's new housing policy is a hit.

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292. At 8:34pm on 04 Sep 2008, rogueslr wrote:
Oi Pet, can you manage? 'Cos Newcastle could do with some help now Keegan's gone.

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293. At 8:38pm on 04 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
"These polyester bags seem to be generating a bit too much static."

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294. At 8:46pm on 04 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
Participants for the new series of 'How to Look Good Naked' come over all shy

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295. At 8:47pm on 04 Sep 2008, penny-farthing wrote:
These highly trained,peak of performance, athletes display how they cope with that notorious pain barrier known as 'The Wall'.

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296. At 8:53pm on 04 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
"This is where Grade B at GCSE gets yer, Tracy...if only we'd turned up for the exams."

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297. At 8:54pm on 04 Sep 2008, sternpaddler wrote:
"Can you let us down please Sternpaddler, we promise we won't complain about your comments ever again"

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298. At 9:01pm on 04 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
"Wow! Look at that woman walking down the wall..."

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299. At 9:29pm on 04 Sep 2008, littleDickie wrote:
"Oh Bugger...I need to go potty..."

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300. At 9:32pm on 04 Sep 2008, Kipson wrote:
My mum always said I'd wind up a wallflower.

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301. At 9:34pm on 04 Sep 2008, littleDickie wrote:
"Oi Chalky, can you do us a liquid sarnie, as I cannot use me 'ands...?

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302. At 9:45pm on 04 Sep 2008, Stitch89 wrote:
Ahhhh....NOW its three pees in a pod!

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303. At 9:59pm on 04 Sep 2008, littleDickie wrote:
"I had a right slap-up dinner of beans and mash last night, and...I need some help to get out of this bag...Puh-leese...!"

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304. At 10:05pm on 04 Sep 2008, littleDickie wrote:

" Do I have to watch that telly thing with
those American politicians again, tonight...?"

"Do us a favour, either turn the telly off,
or turn us to the wall, this is only worse than waterboarding..."

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305. At 10:13pm on 04 Sep 2008, rogueslr wrote:
'I spy with my little eye something beginning with P'. 'Is it pigeon?' 'Pigeons! NO....'

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306. At 10:19pm on 04 Sep 2008, Hobbitmorley wrote:
Goldilocks strikes back.....

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307. At 10:27pm on 04 Sep 2008, Dodie_James wrote:
Around the world, in four thousand seven hundred and eighty days..

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308. At 10:29pm on 04 Sep 2008, CyberSerb wrote:
"The Perfect Spouse (TM): energy-efficient, disposable, biodegradable. Today only - three for the price of one!"

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309. At 10:30pm on 04 Sep 2008, CyberSerb wrote:
It's not really much of a job, but it's better than just hanging around!"

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310. At 10:31pm on 04 Sep 2008, CyberSerb wrote:
If you take all three of them down with one arrow, you get a teddy bear!

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311. At 10:47pm on 04 Sep 2008, W_K_Snowdon wrote:
If Carlsberg did ticket queues..

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312. At 10:48pm on 04 Sep 2008, Robby76 wrote:
This bag re-use policy is going a bit far now....

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313. At 10:56pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Wall A'bored

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314. At 11:06pm on 04 Sep 2008, scavenge wrote:
"Quit moaning, it could be worse" says Mary Magdalene

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315. At 11:11pm on 04 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
"When they tried to make me go to rehab...I wish I'd said No..."

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316. At 11:11pm on 04 Sep 2008, scavenge wrote:
Interest in David Blane's latest stunt appears to have been limited.

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317. At 11:17pm on 04 Sep 2008, FrankGrimesJnr wrote:
"Well now, would you look at that...the 09.37 to Croydon ON TIME !"

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318. At 11:21pm on 04 Sep 2008, W_K_Snowdon wrote:
The overly loud unintelligible loudspeaker announcements, huddled masses trudging forlornly this way and that, queue jumping, dodgy food, strange acts, rip-off concessions, drunken loutishness, timetables awry, bolshie stewards.. Yes, Victoria Station brings all the flavour of Glastonbury, without the hassle of travelling there and without mud!!!

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319. At 11:25pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Charley says "Drink too much and pass out on a bench and this could happen to you!"

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320. At 11:29pm on 04 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
The Ridley Scott commemorative plaque was proving an attention getter

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321. At 11:37pm on 04 Sep 2008, CyberSerb wrote:
Do I get a discount if i buy all three of them?

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322. At 11:37pm on 04 Sep 2008, CyberSerb wrote:
Do I get a discount if I buy all three of them?

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323. At 11:39pm on 04 Sep 2008, CyberSerb wrote:
Right, we've narrowed our investigation to three suspects. No, ma'am, can you identify the one who flashed you at this station last night?

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324. At 11:59pm on 04 Sep 2008, MattFPi wrote:
The latest attempt to make cricket more exciting for today's public involves new forfeits for being out for a duck.

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325. At 00:23am on 05 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
The punishment for being caught with non-recyclable plastics was meant to be an example to other eco campers

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326. At 00:44am on 05 Sep 2008, sam_leader wrote:
Most of the passengers preferred the Anne Geddes original

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327. At 01:45am on 05 Sep 2008, HeadBeeGuy wrote:
The other two thought it would be fun to spike the centre guy's herbal remedy drink with Viagra.

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328. At 01:48am on 05 Sep 2008, HeadBeeGuy wrote:
New punishment unveiled for travellers caught using mobile phones in the 'quiet' carriage.

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329. At 06:59am on 05 Sep 2008, LaurenceLane wrote:
If you think this is bad, I've just bought the boxed set of the first series of 'Bonekickers'.

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330. At 07:58am on 05 Sep 2008, frigorifico wrote:
"Hello! You must be the exchange students from Equitorial Guinea."

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331. At 07:58am on 05 Sep 2008, English Yo-Yo wrote:
"Is that a banana in your sleeping bag, or are you just pleased to see me?"

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332. At 08:18am on 05 Sep 2008, Tremorman wrote:
Incredible Hulk movie halted as crew locate detatched fingers.

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333. At 08:24am on 05 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
"Stop there! You're in the eye of the hurricane!"

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334. At 08:30am on 05 Sep 2008, Zol_Rubatabi wrote:
Three new political strategists hatch from their alien cocoons.

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335. At 08:36am on 05 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
"Always look on the bright side of life...phew pheeeew phew pheeew..."

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336. At 08:49am on 05 Sep 2008, pinkfloydareace wrote:
The Body Shop and organisers of Glastonbury have come up with an idea that prevents sleeping bags getting muddy and create more floorspace

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337. At 08:50am on 05 Sep 2008, pinkfloydareace wrote:
I wish The Body Shop used No More Nails instead of actual nails...

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338. At 08:53am on 05 Sep 2008, pinkfloydareace wrote:
The Body Shop are promoting their idea for what should be the newest Olympic sport

Sleeping Bag Racing

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339. At 08:53am on 05 Sep 2008, pinkfloydareace wrote:
Excuse me Miss, can I go to the toilet?

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340. At 08:56am on 05 Sep 2008, fionapar wrote:
'And no snoring or sleepwalking allowed'

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341. At 08:57am on 05 Sep 2008, jimmyog wrote:
The herbal sleep remedy would probably have worked fine, said Shirley, if it hadn't been for those bl**dy nails in my shoulders !

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342. At 09:05am on 05 Sep 2008, jimmyog wrote:
Network Rail suspend herbal sleep remedy promotion.

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343. At 09:14am on 05 Sep 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
I see Spiderman 4 is going to be on release soon.

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344. At 09:17am on 05 Sep 2008, Jordan D wrote:
Jennifer was still asleep after the commute, and was sure that butterflies didn't use to be that big.

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345. At 09:19am on 05 Sep 2008, John_Sevenoaks wrote:
Legless binge drinkers show 'that girl' how to stay upright.

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346. At 09:36am on 05 Sep 2008, SundayParkGeorge wrote:
Newcastle United get desperate in their hunt for a manager who will hang around for a bit

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347. At 09:54am on 05 Sep 2008, wcashin wrote:
All together...

Some things in life are bad,
They can really make you mad.

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348. At 09:58am on 05 Sep 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
Oh god! Shelob has risen and moved to London!

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349. At 09:59am on 05 Sep 2008, Snaggers wrote:
The MM's interactive Facebook wall wasn't living up to expectations

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350. At 10:04am on 05 Sep 2008, Young-buk wrote:
The calendula and sticky-bud herbal remedy had some unusual side effects.

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351. At 10:14am on 05 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
"And this is what happens to people who use the letter form to the right"

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352. At 10:15am on 05 Sep 2008, CairngormMcWomble wrote:
As the testers started to pupate, scientists still denied there were any adverse side effects.

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353. At 10:16am on 05 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Adrianne versus Predator

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354. At 10:19am on 05 Sep 2008, jellyba wrote:
Coccoon The Nightmare

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355. At 10:21am on 05 Sep 2008, jellyba wrote:
sponsorship of train company by Caterpillar hits snag

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356. At 10:22am on 05 Sep 2008, jellyba wrote:
New sleeper car design
more bugs on seats

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357. At 10:22am on 05 Sep 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
"And this is where we store the backup train conductors."

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358. At 10:23am on 05 Sep 2008, jellyba wrote:
DIY mummies

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359. At 10:23am on 05 Sep 2008, greekdancer wrote:
''When you said we'd be as snug as a bug in a rug, this isn't quite what i had in mind!''

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360. At 10:24am on 05 Sep 2008, jellyba wrote:
Get us a can of Red Bull sweetheart

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361. At 10:25am on 05 Sep 2008, Caddyshaq wrote:
Are you sure that this latest task came from Sir Alan?

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362. At 10:25am on 05 Sep 2008, jellyba wrote:
Commuter kills family after visit to Tut exhibition

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363. At 10:26am on 05 Sep 2008, jellyba wrote:
Stag night horror

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364. At 10:28am on 05 Sep 2008, jellyba wrote:
Freak gale at camp site

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365. At 10:28am on 05 Sep 2008, Caddyshaq wrote:
"Madame Butterfly starts quite slowly but the second Act is a lot better"

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366. At 10:28am on 05 Sep 2008, jellyba wrote:
Ticket queues get worse

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367. At 10:29am on 05 Sep 2008, robz1uk wrote:
Hangovers aint what they used to be.

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368. At 10:29am on 05 Sep 2008, jellyba wrote:
What platform the Glastonbury express?

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369. At 10:31am on 05 Sep 2008, jellyba wrote:
Three green bottles hanging on a wall performance art

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370. At 10:39am on 05 Sep 2008, SophieBowley-Aicken wrote:
Hang in there, mate, we'll pupate yet...

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371. At 10:48am on 05 Sep 2008, Wunnunda wrote:
"...it's nothing to get hung about...Strawberry Fields for ever..."....just put the money in the hat love...oh, bugger....

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372. At 10:55am on 05 Sep 2008, SundayParkGeorge wrote:
Gordon Brown insists on advanced safety testing when he hears he's about to be hung out to dry by the Labour party.

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373. At 11:01am on 05 Sep 2008, happyjammel wrote:
body shop now selling bodies in plastic wrap

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374. At 11:02am on 05 Sep 2008, georgehh wrote:
South West Trains unveils the winning design for its competition to find ways of fitting more people on the 8.12 to Waterloo

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375. At 11:05am on 05 Sep 2008, illegitimatewit wrote:
"well they sure nailed our grasses to the wall this time"

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376. At 11:09am on 05 Sep 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
Hibernation, an effective treatment for Seasonal Affective Disorder?

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377. At 11:10am on 05 Sep 2008, cheroyce wrote:
The organisers of this year's London Passion Play may find this creative decision a step too far for most audiences.

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378. At 11:12am on 05 Sep 2008, willyb1007 wrote:
The London 2012 Ceremonial Thinktank had been tagged and bagged and waiting for departure after the dismal handover display in Beijing.

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379. At 11:15am on 05 Sep 2008, gdstalker wrote:
Londoners snap up the only homes available with no stamp duty

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380. At 11:18am on 05 Sep 2008, Lordstein wrote:
The students' trip to London to "get nailed" went well.

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381. At 11:19am on 05 Sep 2008, PoacheLeRen wrote:
Victoria Station's infamous giant spider warned other passengers by leaving his prey coccooned on platform 6.

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382. At 11:21am on 05 Sep 2008, geniusstoke1863 wrote:
Public humiliation fails to cure sex addicts.

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383. At 11:21am on 05 Sep 2008, Quitnowgordon wrote:
Santa's dementia was becoming more evident than ever.....

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384. At 11:24am on 05 Sep 2008, Mute Joe wrote:
Turnout was expextedly low at the first David Blaine Convention.

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385. At 11:28am on 05 Sep 2008, paulvilla wrote:
Brace yourselves, here comes a bag snatcher!

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386. At 11:30am on 05 Sep 2008, CairngormMcWomble wrote:
Officials were quick to deny that queueing for the 2012 games had already started

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387. At 11:34am on 05 Sep 2008, EngineeredSunshine wrote:
If we don't move, she can't see us!

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388. At 11:37am on 05 Sep 2008, Eregol wrote:
'Hi, our flight was delayed again, and this was the only place we could find to have a rest.'

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389. At 11:41am on 05 Sep 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
Hurricane Albert proves to be small, but powerful.

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390. At 11:47am on 05 Sep 2008, Fungus the Bogeyman wrote:
The Body Shop displays the three most recent sackings from its organisation

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391. At 11:49am on 05 Sep 2008, Fungus the Bogeyman wrote:
Divorcee invited to human recycling point to find potential new partner

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392. At 11:51am on 05 Sep 2008, chumphrey2000 wrote:
cuckooned

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393. At 11:55am on 05 Sep 2008, nickson1 wrote:
Striving to out-wit the public, eco-friendly Draculas latest three converts were well prepared for their attack on the 21:47 from Victoria

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394. At 11:55am on 05 Sep 2008, hmsintheplace wrote:
"At least it's not piano wire" - Brown sees leniency for would be terrorist assassins.

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395. At 12:00pm on 05 Sep 2008, Caddyshaq wrote:
Horrified at the investment required to get the trains to run on time Network Rail goes for the cheaper option of cryogenically freezing passengers until their train arrives

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396. At 12:01pm on 05 Sep 2008, TeaSpoonerism wrote:
Super Glue? No, I'm afraid you'll have to try WHSmith's said Leanne for the 1000th time that day

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397. At 12:04pm on 05 Sep 2008, nickson1 wrote:
In his latest masterpiece Slinkachu was surprised to find someone else working on a much bigger scale

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398. At 12:11pm on 05 Sep 2008, DavidDeeMoz wrote:
Long-suffering viewers finally stick Jeremy, Richard and James to the Cool Wall.

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399. At 12:13pm on 05 Sep 2008, RamsysUK wrote:
And for the saftey concsious indian mystic's..............the new bed of nails!

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400. At 12:16pm on 05 Sep 2008, DeceptivelySlow13 wrote:
Darling, Miliband and Clark learn the hard way not to go "off message".

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401. At 12:28pm on 05 Sep 2008, youngWillz wrote:
The Last Post

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