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Caption Competition

13:15 UK time, Friday, 4 July 2008

Winning entries in the Caption Competition.

This week, the picture shows a fan at Wimbledon avoiding the weather.

The competition is now closed. Full rules can be seen here [PDF].

Thanks to all who entered. The prize of a small amount of kudos to the following:

6. SimonRooke
Fiona Shackleton prepares for court as Heather Mills appeals the divorce settlement.

5. antdav24
"I was sure I saw a TV guide in here somewhere."

4. archstinker
Bird's Eye launched their new "Boil in the Bag Roy Orbison"

3. GreatUncleBulgariaJr
The Middle England Liberation Army dispose of their latest victim, Harriet Harman. Next the big prize, Gordon Brown.

2. KarenKomment
MP returns from holiday to find second home allowance has been discontinued.

1. Rob_the_Teacher
Once the threat of rain had passed, Sir Cliff was carefully wrapped and returned to his basement under Centre Court to wait for another year.

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1. At 12:09pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
The new transparent Daily Mail proved a big hit with readers

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2. At 12:10pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
And this design comes with full sound-proofing in case Sir Cliff starts to sing

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3. At 12:12pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Perhaps, if Andy Murray had been able to move his arms about more easily, he might have won

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4. At 12:14pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Sunglasses AND a mac? It just has to be Wimbledon!

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5. At 12:16pm on 03 Jul 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Even Great-Uncle Bulgaria put in a surprise appearance at Wimbledon.

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6. At 12:17pm on 03 Jul 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Even the moles had come prepared for the rain.

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7. At 12:20pm on 03 Jul 2008, gazardo wrote:
The ectoplasm produced at the seance had clearly been a free gift from the "aily Mail" and subsequently failed to convince witnesses.

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8. At 12:23pm on 03 Jul 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
The streaker was taking no chances with the weather

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9. At 12:25pm on 03 Jul 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Gerald couldn't understand why his raincoat was crumpled, as it had been in the press

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10. At 12:26pm on 03 Jul 2008, srossmoyes wrote:
The Daily Mail's new giveaway of a free bird watcher certainly beat the competition's free birdwatching books.

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11. At 12:27pm on 03 Jul 2008, Rob Falconer
This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.
12. At 12:27pm on 03 Jul 2008, nikaso wrote:
A new simulator is released to give non Daily Mail readers the chance to experience genuine feelings of terror similar to those caused by reading the paper.

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13. At 12:28pm on 03 Jul 2008, clarcombe wrote:
The leader of the Tarp was surprised to see the helicopter.

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14. At 12:29pm on 03 Jul 2008, Kipson wrote:
Plastic fetishist claims he was subject of newspaper's entrapment ploy.

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15. At 12:29pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Rheum with a view

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16. At 12:30pm on 03 Jul 2008, Kipson wrote:
I just wish the players would stop spitting out their drinks. What do they think this is, a soccer match?

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17. At 12:32pm on 03 Jul 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Tim Henman tried to sneek in the back way but was spotted by photographers

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18. At 12:32pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
They did all they could to keep Murray mint.

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19. At 12:33pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
And it came with a free DVD and wall chart

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20. At 12:33pm on 03 Jul 2008, Papa-Joe wrote:
Man eating, right wing jellyfish were the bain of this year's Wimbledon.

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21. At 12:34pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
One word: Plastics

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22. At 12:36pm on 03 Jul 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
The new Doctor Who monsters try to ensure a win at Wimbledon

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23. At 12:38pm on 03 Jul 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Too late, an explosion at the Wimbledon Plastic Bag Recycling Plant threatens to eliminate all Andy Murray?s rivals

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24. At 12:39pm on 03 Jul 2008, geodesy wrote:
'Scuse me mate, has Glastonbury finished yet?

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25. At 12:40pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Do NOT go into the light. Stop where you are. Turn away from it. Don't even look at it.

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26. At 12:40pm on 03 Jul 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Spectators might have guessed that the free Daily Mail plastic hat would give way in the extreme heat

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27. At 12:40pm on 03 Jul 2008, Wunnunda wrote:
As the 'raincoat of inevitability' meets the 'sunglass of hope'....

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28. At 12:42pm on 03 Jul 2008, Tekaniet wrote:
At last Paper Monitor was convinced that the local newsagent had run out of the Daily Mail. Boy, was she in trouble...

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29. At 12:42pm on 03 Jul 2008, jettro_heller wrote:
Caution, keep out of the reach of children, this is not a toy.

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30. At 12:43pm on 03 Jul 2008, jettro_heller wrote:
Harry discovers that his invisibility cloak has a hole in it.

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31. At 12:44pm on 03 Jul 2008, Rob Falconer wrote:
Too late, an explosion at the Wimbledon Plastic Bag Recycling Plant threatens to eliminate all Andy Murray's rivals

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32. At 12:44pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
Every crowd has a silver lining.

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33. At 12:44pm on 03 Jul 2008, AlanPJ wrote:
Exclusive preview shot of the latest Dr. Who monster.

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34. At 12:45pm on 03 Jul 2008, CairngormMcWomble wrote:
the new rainproof burqa had a subtle design flaw

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35. At 12:46pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
It would take years for Little Billy to forgive Aunt Agatha for pinching his plastic mac

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36. At 12:47pm on 03 Jul 2008, Martyn_KGM wrote:
When I grow up I'm going to be a butterfly!

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37. At 12:47pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Jade was upset to find that some of the news-print had rubbed off onto her new trendy pack-a-mac

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38. At 12:48pm on 03 Jul 2008, jettro_heller wrote:
What is it Skippy? Sonny's stuck in a big plastic bag? And Centre Court's about to flood?

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39. At 12:48pm on 03 Jul 2008, Martyn_KGM wrote:
Can someone pass the strawberries?

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40. At 12:49pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
Recycling Henman fans just became a lot easier.

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41. At 12:49pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Don't rain on my Parade (which the gentleman is reading under his plastic mac)

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42. At 12:50pm on 03 Jul 2008, Martyn_KGM wrote:
Does this make my bum look big?

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43. At 12:50pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839
This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.
44. At 12:51pm on 03 Jul 2008, Snaggers wrote:
Members of the Little Englanders' society parade their new uniforms.

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45. At 12:51pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Haily Mail loved her personalised plastic mac

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46. At 12:51pm on 03 Jul 2008, APeterJ wrote:
Bernard proved that he COULD punch his way out of a plastic bag.

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47. At 12:52pm on 03 Jul 2008, pedro_fusball wrote:
After 14 years Ingrid Betancourt finaly realises he captors have only used a fimbsy piece of plastic to keep her contained and she escapes to freedom.

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48. At 12:52pm on 03 Jul 2008, APeterJ wrote:
Number 6 finally punctures Rover and discovers that Number 1 is really a newspaper proprietor.

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49. At 12:52pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Harry regretted asking for a seat "within spitting distance of the players"

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50. At 12:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Take me to your leaderboard

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51. At 12:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, Snaggers wrote:
I told you Malcolm, this government can even ruin Wimbledon's impeccable weather.

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52. At 12:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, vikasshah wrote:
Police were appalled by the frenzied attack on the defenceless jellyfish.

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53. At 12:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
In tribute to Marcel Marceau, I give you 'Man Escaping from Plastic Bag'.

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54. At 12:54pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
One of the sweatier members of the Star Wars films attended Wimbledon this year : see-through B.O.

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55. At 12:54pm on 03 Jul 2008, Snaggers wrote:
Wet and Annoyed from Surrey made her annual pilgrimage to SW19

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56. At 12:54pm on 03 Jul 2008, geodesy wrote:
MI5 dismissed the rumours of a right wing mole as "transparent nonsense".

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57. At 12:55pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Let's just bag it and go home

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58. At 12:55pm on 03 Jul 2008, APeterJ wrote:
Damn, I've dropped my orange again

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59. At 12:57pm on 03 Jul 2008, CoasterCowboy wrote:
Brenda's plan to sneak into Wimbledon with the morning papers had a slight flaw.

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60. At 12:57pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
The Williams sisters introduce a third sibling, Polythenia

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61. At 12:59pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
It was so cold, the rain was freezing as it landed on the spectators

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62. At 12:59pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
And that Timmy is how babies are born.

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63. At 1:00pm on 03 Jul 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
FREE today! The Daily Mail all-in-one defence system. Protects against superbugs, global warming, immigrants and falling house prices.

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64. At 1:03pm on 03 Jul 2008, senojnerrad wrote:
The Daily Mail's "send asylum seekers home in a jiffy bag" campaign claims it's latest victim.

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65. At 1:04pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
Sue Barker hadn't really got the hang of this plastic surgery thing.

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66. At 1:05pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Daily Maelstrom

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67. At 1:06pm on 03 Jul 2008, fionapar wrote:
'I said drop strawberries - not worms'

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68. At 1:07pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Harry had got the Harley-Davidson and the Police shades, but couldn't quite afford the leather jacket

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69. At 1:08pm on 03 Jul 2008, redbyname wrote:
"Yes, I know it's a bit small, but I've had it since I was a kid, and the roof's going on next year so there's no point in buying another one."

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70. At 1:08pm on 03 Jul 2008, jonnie_london wrote:
Reporter's prepare to interview Big Brother housemate ejected in spitting row

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71. At 1:09pm on 03 Jul 2008, redbyname wrote:
Try as he might, he was still recognisable as a Daily Mail reader.

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72. At 1:09pm on 03 Jul 2008, jonnie_london wrote:
Reporter attacked by computer from Superman III

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73. At 1:10pm on 03 Jul 2008, jonnie_london wrote:
Daily Mail reporter struggles to extract lunch from child-proof bag

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74. At 1:11pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
No, I asked for condiments, Henry, you know, ketchup, mustard...

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75. At 1:11pm on 03 Jul 2008, danteGideon wrote:
In Wimbledon, nothing can be said to be certain, except raincoats and sunglasses.

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76. At 1:11pm on 03 Jul 2008, MuteJoe wrote:
"At least we only lost a 'device'!", thought William Lewis

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77. At 1:11pm on 03 Jul 2008, John_Sevenoaks wrote:
For the ladies - Free with the Daily Mail every day this week - your very own Man Bag.

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78. At 1:12pm on 03 Jul 2008, JamesWTT wrote:
On hearing a rumour that Murray had made the final, the crowd anxiously check for flying pigs....

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79. At 1:13pm on 03 Jul 2008, fionapar wrote:
'Good, still can't see Trinny and Susannah anywhere ....'

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80. At 1:14pm on 03 Jul 2008, jonnie_london wrote:
RSPCA high sympathy hopes for follow-on campaign of the danger plastic bags represent to turtles for new endangered species, Mail Readerasarus

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81. At 1:15pm on 03 Jul 2008, fionapar wrote:
Latest Daily Mail reader about to undergo plastic surgery to protect his identity......

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82. At 1:16pm on 03 Jul 2008, respectedtranquil wrote:
The new Wimbledon weather-proof wrapping seemed to confuse some readers.

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83. At 1:16pm on 03 Jul 2008, throbgusset wrote:
Wimbledon pundit John McEnroe proves he cannot be serious

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84. At 1:19pm on 03 Jul 2008, John_Sevenoaks wrote:
Recycle the unwanted men in your life. Just place in the bag and leave by the kerbside.

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85. At 1:19pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
And if we fasten the velcro, it doubles as a shopping bag

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86. At 1:19pm on 03 Jul 2008, chocoholic1984 wrote:
'Dr Who' wardrobe department feels the pinch as severe budget cuts lead to dramatic drop in standards and national sponsorship deal.

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87. At 1:19pm on 03 Jul 2008, DOWLAISTWP1 wrote:
during rag week students strike again with the cling film stunt

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88. At 1:20pm on 03 Jul 2008, throbgusset wrote:
The Daily Mail rain poncho only gave coverage on the far right

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89. At 1:20pm on 03 Jul 2008, Hairbear61 wrote:
Maria Sharapova's original outfit got a thorough going-over by the Style Police.

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90. At 1:20pm on 03 Jul 2008, fionapar wrote:
'I'm not taking any chances - even after them shooting all those pigeons, one might still try and get me'

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91. At 1:22pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
It was no good. Only the Mail on Sunday supplements could keep the rain off.

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92. At 1:24pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Worst case of hygienist envy I've ever seen, Watson

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93. At 1:25pm on 03 Jul 2008, christrueman wrote:
Real journalists everywhere breathed a sigh of relief as the last of the Daily Mail readers were vacum packed and put away forever.

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94. At 1:26pm on 03 Jul 2008, geodesy wrote:
The winner of the Daily Mail's "Win a luxury condo" competition struggles to recall the precise wording.

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95. At 1:26pm on 03 Jul 2008, THINKPATRICK wrote:
English Supermac beats the rain at Wimbledon

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96. At 1:26pm on 03 Jul 2008, sarahtrieste wrote:
This game is in the bag.

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97. At 1:27pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Psychiatrist visits Wimbledon shrink-wrapped

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98. At 1:28pm on 03 Jul 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
That big, black cloud can only mean one thing...Andy Murray is giving an interview.

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99. At 1:29pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Well, you could harldy have a raincoat with "The Sun" on, could you?

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100. At 1:30pm on 03 Jul 2008, christrueman wrote:
free boil in the bag Grandma with every Mail on Sunday!

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101. At 1:30pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Well, you could hardly have a raincoat with "The Sun" on, could you?

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102. At 1:32pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Wimbledon provides visual proof that Elvis is not dead

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103. At 1:34pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Certain visitors from the North prefer to watch Wimbledon from behind net curtains

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104. At 1:35pm on 03 Jul 2008, PoacheLeRen wrote:
The Daily Mail safe sex campaign gets out of hand...

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105. At 1:36pm on 03 Jul 2008, sarahtrieste wrote:
HELP! I'm drowning!

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106. At 1:38pm on 03 Jul 2008, PennyDrop wrote:
Flushed with success at fighting his way out of a paper bag, British heavy weight champion decides to take on a plastic bag.

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107. At 1:38pm on 03 Jul 2008, bradshad1 wrote:
"Free this week with with the Daily Mail, a plastic jacket to protect you from getting too dirty reading this filth"

I get the feeling any caption slating the Mail will not win.

"Government denys new low cost affordable housing is cheap and tacky"

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108. At 1:38pm on 03 Jul 2008, John_Sevenoaks wrote:
The last hole in the new Centre Court roof is closed.

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109. At 1:41pm on 03 Jul 2008, jazzie129uk wrote:
Daily Mail editor unveils the paper's new focus on hard news...

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110. At 1:41pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
You say it makes me look stupid? It was free with the Daily Express!

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111. At 1:42pm on 03 Jul 2008, fionapar wrote:
As the credit crisis bites, the Daily Mail donates emergency housing

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112. At 1:43pm on 03 Jul 2008, 28Handicap wrote:
Andy Murray thought using an oxygen tent between sets would speed up recovery times, unfortunately, Andy?s design had a fatal flaw...

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113. At 1:43pm on 03 Jul 2008, pandatank wrote:
Daily Mail reader finally sees the light

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114. At 1:45pm on 03 Jul 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
"Yes, this is my first Wet Wet Wet concert"

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115. At 1:45pm on 03 Jul 2008, John_Sevenoaks wrote:
"Sorry, Serena, 'dress should be predominantly white'."

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116. At 1:46pm on 03 Jul 2008, GreatUncleBulgariaJr wrote:
'Oh do shut up Audrey. You are not "a little black raincloud" and you're certainly not Winne The Bleedin' Pooh'

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117. At 1:47pm on 03 Jul 2008, GreatUncleBulgariaJr wrote:
The Middle England Liberation Army dispose of their latest victim, Harriet Harmon. Next the big prize, Gordon Brown.

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118. At 1:47pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fi-Glos wrote:
Gok Wan cancels the initial pilot for his new show "How To Look Good With Your Clothes On" after Ann Widdecombe is revealed as the first guest.

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119. At 1:48pm on 03 Jul 2008, Kipson wrote:
Superman regretted changing his sponsor away from the Daily Planet, their outfits had been much easier to get into.

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120. At 1:51pm on 03 Jul 2008, NormanAS wrote:

Little Deuce Cape

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121. At 1:51pm on 03 Jul 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
This is spoiling my Roy Orbison impression!

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122. At 1:51pm on 03 Jul 2008, s_slatt wrote:
The vet always hated having to get a urine sample from the elephants

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123. At 1:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, NormanAS wrote:

Join Macs in Row

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124. At 1:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, MJF_dodo wrote:
Betty phone home! Betty phone home!

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125. At 1:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, maddyallen wrote:
A rare sighting of the little known "ET skin shedding process"

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126. At 1:54pm on 03 Jul 2008, s_slatt wrote:
photos of Paper Monitor's birth have finally been released into the public domain

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127. At 1:54pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fi-Glos wrote:
Valerie Singleton stays dry at Wimbledon, thanks to some discarded plastic bags, some sticky-backed plastic and a copy of the Daily Mail.

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128. At 1:55pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
Wimbledon stratus quo.

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129. At 1:56pm on 03 Jul 2008, msflowerfairy wrote:
My Mother would be so proud, she always told me to use protection!

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130. At 1:57pm on 03 Jul 2008, Kipson wrote:
David Blaine's endurance feats hadn't brought in the cash he'd expected so this time he'd decided to cut back on the cost and find a sponsor.

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131. At 1:58pm on 03 Jul 2008, Kipson wrote:
The safe sex message finally strikes home.

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132. At 2:01pm on 03 Jul 2008, doubleshiny wrote:
Emerging from it's pod, the cloned Daily Mail reader pleases creators by hating both gypsies and inflation.

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133. At 2:03pm on 03 Jul 2008, ShroppyFarm wrote:
"Oh Jenny look, no hole for the head and just one for both arms - typical foreign made rubbish!"

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134. At 2:06pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fi-Glos wrote:
Tarby takes precautions, as he realises that he's in front of Roy Hattersley in the Royal Box.

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135. At 2:09pm on 03 Jul 2008, clarcombe wrote:
The beerkeg funnel proved popular between sets.

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136. At 2:12pm on 03 Jul 2008, clarcombe wrote:
The Daily Mail/ Wimbledon "Safe Sets" message seemed to be getting through

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137. At 2:15pm on 03 Jul 2008, Drochle wrote:
The Daily Mail secured an exclusive interview with the cleverly disguised ET. We all know how much the Daily Mail loves a good illegal alien story...

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138. At 2:23pm on 03 Jul 2008, blues_x_man wrote:
The new Daily Mail sponsored housing inniative for immigrants.

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139. At 2:27pm on 03 Jul 2008, MersonTuffers wrote:
How many points do Tesco's give for a plastic mac?

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140. At 2:28pm on 03 Jul 2008, littleDickie wrote:
"All the rest of my mates are in the Volvo,
'cept for Trevor and me."

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141. At 2:28pm on 03 Jul 2008, Drumbeater wrote:
'Please Lord, stop it raining before Cliff Richard starts singing again!'

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142. At 2:30pm on 03 Jul 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
Daily Mail reader heads warning of falling sky.

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143. At 2:31pm on 03 Jul 2008, ScuderiaSquidstew wrote:
The Daily Mail Attack Amoebas begin subjugating the population of Great Britain. Starting with the immigrants and gays, of course.

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144. At 2:31pm on 03 Jul 2008, littleDickie wrote:
"I'm not really bovered, it's just to keep my hair from frizzing in the slight mists of SW19."

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145. At 2:33pm on 03 Jul 2008, sarahtrieste wrote:
Macman.

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146. At 2:33pm on 03 Jul 2008, Hydrostrat wrote:
ET phone home

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147. At 2:33pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
Have you got a light mac? No, just this stupid plastic bag!

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148. At 2:34pm on 03 Jul 2008, John_Sevenoaks wrote:
An anxious diner awaits Gordon Ramsay's reaction to him sending back the lobster bisque.

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149. At 2:34pm on 03 Jul 2008, sarahtrieste wrote:
Modern plastic macs had taken all the surprise out of flashing.

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150. At 2:36pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
And this Timmy is how catepillars turn into butterflies.

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151. At 2:40pm on 03 Jul 2008, Jordan D
This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.
152. At 2:40pm on 03 Jul 2008, Jordan D wrote:
Once again, a Daily Mail reader fails to see the bigger picture.

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153. At 2:40pm on 03 Jul 2008, grazvalentine wrote:
?A goldfish won me at the fair.?

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154. At 2:40pm on 03 Jul 2008, froopy wrote:
Sponsor upset as nationwide anti-immigration barrier is breached

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155. At 2:42pm on 03 Jul 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
Primark have teamed up with the Daily Mail to bring you a new range of budget rainwear with a social conscience.

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156. At 2:42pm on 03 Jul 2008, asillygit wrote:
To the pretty lady in the magazine:
Am I not irresistible?

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157. At 2:43pm on 03 Jul 2008, John_Sevenoaks wrote:
Wimbly, the Wimbledon groundhog, looks around for his shadow, before retreating to his burrow. Another two weeks of showers are predicted.

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158. At 2:43pm on 03 Jul 2008, user013 wrote:
The Daily Mail somewhat missed the point with their see-through yashmak.

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159. At 2:44pm on 03 Jul 2008, martem wrote:
Dr Zoidberg seeks scientific solutoin to insufficient protection against Cliff Richard.

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160. At 2:44pm on 03 Jul 2008, embraboy wrote:
The Mac versus PC debate is misunderstood in some segments of the tennis going public.

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161. At 2:47pm on 03 Jul 2008, pablowains wrote:
I�ve always considered the "Daily Mail" an impervious newspaper.

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162. At 2:48pm on 03 Jul 2008, CamberwellBeauty wrote:
Feeling smug about his plastic wrap, he had thwarted his sell by date

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163. At 2:48pm on 03 Jul 2008, sternpaddler wrote:
Virender Sehwag, when weather was as bad as this, was secretly glad that the condom was a little on the large size.

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164. At 2:49pm on 03 Jul 2008, sternpaddler
This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.
165. At 2:51pm on 03 Jul 2008, sc91hl wrote:
Rosemarie found it increasingly hard to hide behind her middle class values

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166. At 2:51pm on 03 Jul 2008, TooSensible wrote:
The adult daily mail reader emerges from its cocoon before demanding that all overseas players leave immediately.

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167. At 2:52pm on 03 Jul 2008, DivineAubergine wrote:
On his second visit to Earth, ET visits Wimbledon, searching for Elliot, he only finds Venus

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168. At 2:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, stavromulla wrote:
After issuing their readers with sticky plastic, the Daily Mail's campaign to catch illegal immigrants really caught on.

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169. At 2:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, MersonTuffers wrote:
Sarah felt she had made her point regarding excessive packaging by supermarkets....

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170. At 2:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
Prom Night was harder for some kids, especially if mummy was a Green Party member.

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171. At 2:55pm on 03 Jul 2008, MersonTuffers wrote:
This was NOT what Karen meant when she said she wanted a flexable male with lots of plastic...

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172. At 3:04pm on 03 Jul 2008, nadine7346 wrote:
Introducing the lastest addition to the Womble family: Senorita Xenophobia.

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173. At 3:05pm on 03 Jul 2008, jcgwinner wrote:
Camilla having a quick cigarette in the new personal anti passive smoking vest

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174. At 3:05pm on 03 Jul 2008, NormanAS wrote:

Bags Bamigboye

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175. At 3:06pm on 03 Jul 2008, matamatey wrote:
What the Phoenix lander found on Mars had been a close kept secret for years

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176. At 3:07pm on 03 Jul 2008, Burfie0206 wrote:
If pigs could fly !

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177. At 3:08pm on 03 Jul 2008, Burfie0206 wrote:
Boil in the bag !

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178. At 3:08pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Area 54 where are you?

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179. At 3:08pm on 03 Jul 2008, heydrew wrote:
Despite all her cautious preparations, the wicked witch of the west is no match for the Wimbledon rains and begins melting away.

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180. At 3:10pm on 03 Jul 2008, HarveyReid wrote:
The Daily Mail Leader Writer calls for more transparency in Government and less Cover-ups

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181. At 3:10pm on 03 Jul 2008, KieranOx wrote:
Fairground-owning goldfish denies cruelty to humans.

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182. At 3:12pm on 03 Jul 2008, Bluebirdsurge wrote:
The Tardis suddenly appeared as the Nestene began their invasion at Wimbledon.

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183. At 3:14pm on 03 Jul 2008, jcgwinner wrote:
Kylie just arriving from the palace on receiving her OBE from Prince Charles. He apologised for the holes in the roof

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184. At 3:16pm on 03 Jul 2008, Rebecca_Goddard wrote:
Apprentice Lee McQueen had found the perfect disguise for his sickie day at Wimbledon

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185. At 3:22pm on 03 Jul 2008, jcgwinner wrote:
Amy Winehouse trying to keep her beehive dry

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186. At 3:22pm on 03 Jul 2008, rachiebelle wrote:
With the birth of her twins imminent, Angelina Jolie asked her assistant to demonstrate what the birth may look like, should they be caught in the rain...

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187. At 3:23pm on 03 Jul 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
Daily Mail reader heeds warning of falling sky.

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188. At 3:25pm on 03 Jul 2008, JamieKitson wrote:
So that's what they mean when they say that Daily Mail readers have a narrow view.

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189. At 3:29pm on 03 Jul 2008, PennyDrop wrote:
Does my nose look big in this?

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190. At 3:31pm on 03 Jul 2008, DylanRex wrote:
Scooby Doo villians just didn't put the effort in like they used to.

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191. At 3:33pm on 03 Jul 2008, bigpete2000 wrote:
Daily Mail reader attempts engagement with the outside world

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192. At 3:34pm on 03 Jul 2008, blazemore wrote:
"You can never be too careful when travelling outside of Britain. Try the Daily Mail Personal Protector."

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193. At 3:36pm on 03 Jul 2008, PennyDrop wrote:
Ball boy in near fatal court cover accident

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194. At 3:36pm on 03 Jul 2008, Gerry Gilbert wrote:
You can't use that on the elephant, it's got a hole in it!

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195. At 3:41pm on 03 Jul 2008, PennyDrop wrote:
Lucky escape for ball boy who became entangled in experimental court covering device

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196. At 3:41pm on 03 Jul 2008, _Dose_ wrote:
Game, set and hatch!

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197. At 3:41pm on 03 Jul 2008, John_Sevenoaks wrote:
Wearing her complimentary Daily Mail goggles and splatter guard, the Duchess extends her hand to the mens' finalists.

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198. At 3:43pm on 03 Jul 2008, LouiseCoward wrote:
Trapped inside the ghost of Round 4, Andy Murray struggled desperately but could not win.

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199. At 3:43pm on 03 Jul 2008, asillygit wrote:
I feel a bit silly in this gettup. If only I'd brought the bin-liner.

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200. At 3:44pm on 03 Jul 2008, JamesB-cork wrote:
'First human reared in Gro-Bag emerges at south-west London allotment'

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201. At 3:45pm on 03 Jul 2008, julesjobalot wrote:
'Let me out! Let me out!'

'Them balls, them balls!'

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202. At 3:45pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
We see here Fiona Shackleton preparing for court as Heather Mills appeals the divorce settlement.

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203. At 3:49pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
UndercoverGirl Makeup - it's waterproof and suitable for the palest of complexions

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204. At 3:50pm on 03 Jul 2008, Wunnunda wrote:
*Y-A-W-N*
"Is the women's tennis over yet?"

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205. At 3:51pm on 03 Jul 2008, amrollawalla wrote:
David Blaine's latest endurance test "Life in a Plastic Bag" fails to capture the public's imagination.

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206. At 3:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, Ravonski wrote:
The Mail's Pick 'n' Mix stand at Wimbledon caters for all tastes.

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207. At 3:56pm on 03 Jul 2008, stanisstrelli wrote:
Fear had struck Angus Podgorny. The photograph proved that the dreaded Blancmanges had once again returned to Wimbledon. It was only a matter of time before someone was eaten...

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208. At 3:57pm on 03 Jul 2008, georgehh wrote:
Free giveaway with the Daily Mail helps readers prepare for the flood of immigrants

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209. At 3:58pm on 03 Jul 2008, Putasockinit wrote:
William came ready to withstand the projectile grunts that the ladies and gentlemen of the singles seemed to produce.

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210. At 3:59pm on 03 Jul 2008, Justanotherspursfan wrote:
Further environmental fears as giant Jellyfish rain down on Wimbledon.

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211. At 4:03pm on 03 Jul 2008, asillygit wrote:
In his epic match with Gasquet,Murray was seen to focus on certain individuals in the crowd.In his loss to Nadal, Murray,sadly, focused on this one.

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212. At 4:06pm on 03 Jul 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
GCSE Fashion student gets 3 marks.

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213. At 4:09pm on 03 Jul 2008, vel0cityb0y wrote:
I bet he wishes he had a guardian poncho, it might have a little more substance.

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214. At 4:10pm on 03 Jul 2008, ElleUSA wrote:
Hodgkins, the 'great David Bowie giveaway" was only supposed to be a CD ....

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215. At 4:14pm on 03 Jul 2008, PennyDrop wrote:
Boffins had to resolve teething problems with revolutionary court cover mechanism

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216. At 4:20pm on 03 Jul 2008, Northern_Simon wrote:
Daily Mail exposes secret Government plans to shrink wrap terror suspects for up to 48 days

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217. At 4:21pm on 03 Jul 2008, The_Bob_Glasgow wrote:
"And here's the latest from Glasgow fashion week..."

Or

"How a perfectly good poncho can be ruined by corporate sponsorship"

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218. At 4:23pm on 03 Jul 2008, sternpaddler wrote:
Sternpaddler, realising 164 had crossed the line, humbly appologises and hides his head in shame.

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219. At 4:23pm on 03 Jul 2008, amazingwonderman wrote:
Estate agent demonstrating new affordable accommodation to a first time buyer, ?See from here you can see the park through the low maintenance windows?.

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220. At 4:24pm on 03 Jul 2008, Blogathor wrote:
The plastic cover supplied with the paper outfoxed all but the brightest of Daily Mail reader.

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221. At 4:24pm on 03 Jul 2008, fionapar wrote:
White jelly says a quick prayer before meeting pink blancmange in the next round at Wimbledon

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222. At 4:27pm on 03 Jul 2008, shauny213 wrote:
I'm sure it said one size fits all....

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223. At 4:28pm on 03 Jul 2008, Cheese_fest wrote:
The "I'm a Celebrity" bosses denied that this year's witchetty grubs had been genetically modified.

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224. At 4:28pm on 03 Jul 2008, Justanotherspursfan wrote:
The Daily Mail's new advertising campaign kicked off today with:

'You don't have to be daft to read it... But it helps!'

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225. At 4:29pm on 03 Jul 2008, SimonRooke wrote:
They scanned the skies in fear. The last time time there was a caption competition about rain at Wimbledon the BBC stopped doing them for 10 months.

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226. At 4:31pm on 03 Jul 2008, Justanotherspursfan wrote:
The new Cellophane wrapper on the Daily Mail had some readers perplexed as to its use.

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227. At 4:34pm on 03 Jul 2008, Justanotherspursfan wrote:
Keen Butterfly keeper, Jenny, gave a fascinating demonstration to the crowds at Wimbledon during lunch.

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228. At 4:37pm on 03 Jul 2008, greekdancer*muskateer* wrote:
'Aliens at Wimbledon?' Boy did this Daily Mail reader have a story to tell!

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229. At 4:40pm on 03 Jul 2008, legionbrew wrote:
"I'm melting, I'm melting!"

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230. At 4:41pm on 03 Jul 2008, Mr_Leo_Whetter wrote:
Right wing press gets more transparent.

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231. At 4:41pm on 03 Jul 2008, angelofboox wrote:
Fault.

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232. At 4:42pm on 03 Jul 2008, LewisRosa wrote:
The last gasp of the great British Summer!

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233. At 4:43pm on 03 Jul 2008, Tremorman wrote:
Spectators obviously expected a lot of Deuce flying about.

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234. At 4:44pm on 03 Jul 2008, PinhoeMan wrote:
The Mail is forced to rethink its alternative to goldfish as fairground prizes

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235. At 4:44pm on 03 Jul 2008, jonsmithgreen wrote:
Ethel's anti natal clinic was legendary in the parish.

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236. At 4:45pm on 03 Jul 2008, Tremorman wrote:
The daily male was really a bit wet

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237. At 4:48pm on 03 Jul 2008, PinhoeMan wrote:
Independent Observer spots the Mail's Express Guardian from lack of Sun.

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238. At 4:49pm on 03 Jul 2008, Tremorman wrote:
Fans see right through Daily Mail sports wear offer

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239. At 4:50pm on 03 Jul 2008, marrra wrote:
ET found his rain coat

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240. At 4:50pm on 03 Jul 2008, scullyman wrote:
The presence of a bag lady in the crowd at this year's Wimbledon proves that it really is an event for everybody

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241. At 4:51pm on 03 Jul 2008, Tremorman wrote:
Murray shelters from floods of tears

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242. At 4:54pm on 03 Jul 2008, rcrobjohn wrote:
Having broken the last one the umpire opens up a new spectator.

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243. At 4:54pm on 03 Jul 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
Hello, cloud. Hello other cloud. Hello yet another cloud. This must be Wimbledon.

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244. At 4:55pm on 03 Jul 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
Is this what they mean by bagging a good spot?

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245. At 4:56pm on 03 Jul 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
Daily Mail? Did you ever meet his brother, Chain?

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246. At 4:56pm on 03 Jul 2008, ainvan wrote:
Despite the valiant efforts of the Wimbledon staff to restrain him with cling-film, Cliff's rendition of 'Summer Holiday' was still audible.

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247. At 4:57pm on 03 Jul 2008, nigelmccc wrote:
It's part of an effort to improve government transparency.

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248. At 4:58pm on 03 Jul 2008, KylieHarrison wrote:
The Daily Mail's free anti stab vests were creating confusion at Wimbledon.

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249. At 4:58pm on 03 Jul 2008, KylieHarrison wrote:
The Daily Mail reclaims the hoodie for middle England.

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250. At 5:00pm on 03 Jul 2008, EngineeredSunshine wrote:
I think I can still fit the strawberrys in my mouth AND not get wet...

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251. At 5:13pm on 03 Jul 2008, PinhoeMan wrote:
Nigel cringed in embarrasment when he realised he'd gone out in Daily Mail mac and not the one sponsored by his local lap dancing club.

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252. At 5:14pm on 03 Jul 2008, pmsbony wrote:
Houdini turns in his grave as he sees what passes for escapology these days.

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253. At 5:19pm on 03 Jul 2008, pmsbony wrote:
Daily Mail bigwigs regret their sponsorship of a man-eating jellyfish

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254. At 5:23pm on 03 Jul 2008, asillygit wrote:
Putting on the garment had been a masterclass in skill,poise and finishing.Unfortunately, with the light failing and a restless crowd, Jim's pyschological frailties returned and his center court performance degenerated into a nightmare.

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255. At 5:29pm on 03 Jul 2008, kebabsolutely wrote:
the tory jellyfish attack during the third set really livened things up on court 1.

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256. At 5:39pm on 03 Jul 2008, honestAFCCanadian wrote:
After failing to see its shadow, the groundhog predicted another 6 decades of no British men's singles champion.

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257. At 5:41pm on 03 Jul 2008, jimjamjommcgrew wrote:
Daily Mail, in a surprise show of support for kinky motorsport chiefs, promotes asphyxiation fetish.

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258. At 5:41pm on 03 Jul 2008, cheeryNeilDWilson wrote:
The product launch of the new "Disposable Man for Frustrated Women" was a complete disaster, when the spelling mistake on the shrink wrap was noticed too late!

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259. At 5:42pm on 03 Jul 2008, eiger3647 wrote:
In an effort to be "reborn cool," MacMurray dons sunglasses during his squeeze through the artificial birthing canal.

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260. At 5:43pm on 03 Jul 2008, buster_lbrown wrote:
With a large focus on the eco-freindly side of the news, one Wimbledon spectator finds a novel way of recylcing his plastic bags

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261. At 5:49pm on 03 Jul 2008, Snaggers wrote:
The debate about Roger's cardigan and John's mac was nearing it's close...

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262. At 5:49pm on 03 Jul 2008, Spockter wrote:
The government denied that the new UK Space Telescope was underfunded

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263. At 5:54pm on 03 Jul 2008, Speedingmal wrote:
"You have one challenge remaining"

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264. At 5:56pm on 03 Jul 2008, scoobypo wrote:
game, wet and match to nadal

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265. At 6:15pm on 03 Jul 2008, Infense wrote:
Bjorn Again!

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266. At 6:23pm on 03 Jul 2008, wobetide wrote:
We come in peace!

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267. At 6:30pm on 03 Jul 2008, mitchj01 wrote:
Even by Daily Mail standards, Wimbledon's approach to 'safe sex' was a bit much...

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268. At 6:36pm on 03 Jul 2008, nhinton1 wrote:
2012 demonstration sport of Moling celebrates first sponsor.

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269. At 6:42pm on 03 Jul 2008, honesthulley wrote:
"The Wimbledon ticket tout soon regretted over charging the Giant Jellyfish."

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270. At 6:43pm on 03 Jul 2008, tomt08 wrote:
Hmm, judging by the rain, I'm either at Wimbledon or Glastonbury......

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271. At 6:43pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Determined to remian low key in their sponsorship campaigns, Daily Mail advertisers turn to anonymous spokesmodels

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272. At 6:50pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Misspellers of the world untie...

Determined to remain low key in their sponsorship campaigns, Daily Mail advertisers turn to anonymous spokesmodels

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273. At 6:50pm on 03 Jul 2008, ammason999 wrote:
...and the Spanish finalist, Don QuickSoak

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274. At 6:54pm on 03 Jul 2008, clareeH wrote:
World exclusive. Giant jellyfish gives birth to first human hybrid.

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275. At 6:57pm on 03 Jul 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
"Damn foreign players...they come over here, win OUR trophies..."

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276. At 7:11pm on 03 Jul 2008, Therapeutic wrote:
With the growing threat of global terror, the Daily Mail decides "Now is the time to Protect and Survive"

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277. At 7:14pm on 03 Jul 2008, SeanieSmith wrote:
Glastonbury front row spectators prepare for Amy Winehouse encore.

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278. At 7:23pm on 03 Jul 2008, maccladd188 wrote:
This is a LOCAL tennis court, for LOCAL people.

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279. At 7:25pm on 03 Jul 2008, super_stevie_f wrote:
Wimbledon stewards punish the poor person who attempted some "ambush marketing".

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280. At 7:29pm on 03 Jul 2008, maccladd188 wrote:
"This is a LOCAL tennis court, for LOCAL people"

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281. At 7:33pm on 03 Jul 2008, super_stevie_f wrote:
MP tries to conceal her identity so that nobody knows she's claiming her Wimbledon ticket on expenses.

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282. At 7:37pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
If Gallagher did Wimbledon

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283. At 7:41pm on 03 Jul 2008, Kjabooti wrote:
Jonah swallowed by a Daily Mail.

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284. At 7:46pm on 03 Jul 2008, nerdsunited wrote:
Cameron: "Ok, Gordon, i've climbed in here, now what do you want me to do next, ... Master."

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285. At 7:56pm on 03 Jul 2008, ThaiNemesis wrote:
Public interviews begin for the 'World's Happiest Nation' survey...and Britain is off to a slow start.

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286. At 8:07pm on 03 Jul 2008, TadpoleThe1st wrote:
The Daily Mail's free nerve gas suit left a lot to be desired.

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287. At 8:08pm on 03 Jul 2008, aliotis wrote:

Panic-stricken "Mail" reader unable to find advertised 'Free DVD' in cellophane wrapping

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288. At 8:13pm on 03 Jul 2008, bobajob0 wrote:
I can see why the femidome did not catch on

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289. At 8:14pm on 03 Jul 2008, JSlayerUK wrote:
A reader waits nervously to see if their free gift protects them from immigrants and rising house prices.

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290. At 8:15pm on 03 Jul 2008, demitbtbtb wrote:
I think reality newspapers still need a bit of work?

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291. At 8:16pm on 03 Jul 2008, crazeeal wrote:
"Two luminous, disk-like eyes appeared above the rim. A huge rounded bulk, larger than a bear, rose up slowly, glistening like wet leather.

Its lipless mouth quivered and slathered, and snakelike tentacles writhed as the clumsy body heaved and pulsated."

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292. At 8:20pm on 03 Jul 2008, ukjames79 wrote:
Gordon Brown tries out his new 'anti-egg' jacket for use at public events.

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293. At 8:23pm on 03 Jul 2008, amazingandypat wrote:
According to the Daily Mail, the new translucent burkha will make our multicultural society safer than ever before.

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294. At 8:29pm on 03 Jul 2008, beckysbarrett wrote:
Great, let's see how long the planet can survive?

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295. At 8:29pm on 03 Jul 2008, MattFM wrote:
Proof, if needed, that The Daily Mail suffocates society.

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296. At 8:30pm on 03 Jul 2008, fourears wrote:
Come on, David, give us a hug.

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297. At 8:34pm on 03 Jul 2008, Leftpaw wrote:
This new blind transparency approach has left me clutching at straws

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298. At 8:37pm on 03 Jul 2008, MattFPi wrote:
Yet another hopeful fails the first and only test to become a Daily Mail columnist, being unable to find her way out of a plastic bag.

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299. At 8:37pm on 03 Jul 2008, FrankGrimesJnr wrote:
Cash-strapped Waitrose shoppers are seen defecting to discount supermarket.

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300. At 8:47pm on 03 Jul 2008, ifapeter wrote:
A new British Wimbledon Champion? Nope just another pie in the sky.

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301. At 8:52pm on 03 Jul 2008, Fauconnier wrote:
Typical Daily Mail reader! Slightly wet, and with a rather restricted view of life.

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302. At 8:58pm on 03 Jul 2008, C1_Backload wrote:
Daily Mail reader confirms Summer is now worse than ever....

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303. At 8:59pm on 03 Jul 2008, ifapeter wrote:
These weekend newspapers and all of their extra bits are getting ridiculous.

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304. At 9:01pm on 03 Jul 2008, stop_start wrote:
His limbs became heavy, his eyes closed....and all I heard was a faint scream as the Daily Mail claimed another victim.

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305. At 9:04pm on 03 Jul 2008, Terbasmin wrote:
The Daily Mail never realised why their own brand of "funsize" condoms didn't catch on..

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306. At 9:04pm on 03 Jul 2008, Justink40 wrote:
Britain's new female condoms take Wimbledon by storm.

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307. At 9:15pm on 03 Jul 2008, FrankGrimesJnr wrote:
Reluctant volunteer on '10 Years Younger' prepares for public age poll.

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308. At 9:16pm on 03 Jul 2008, Well fan my brow. wrote:
"I hate getting stuck inside plastic bags".

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309. At 9:17pm on 03 Jul 2008, Well fan my brow. wrote:
"Gotta get out of here before I get re-cycled".

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310. At 9:18pm on 03 Jul 2008, ifapeter wrote:
The Wimbledon fans were never going to emulate the fancy dress antics of their cricketing equals

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311. At 9:19pm on 03 Jul 2008, Well fan my brow. wrote:
"Thought this plastic would keep me dry but I'm sweating cobs in here".

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312. At 9:20pm on 03 Jul 2008, Well fan my brow. wrote:
"Blast, I've dropped my snorkel".

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313. At 9:22pm on 03 Jul 2008, the-observer wrote:
The Daily Mail fashion page's new transparent burqa somehow rather seemed to be missing the point.

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314. At 9:22pm on 03 Jul 2008, Douggielee wrote:
The Daily Mail takes its customary narrow view of life.

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315. At 9:24pm on 03 Jul 2008, ifapeter wrote:
Another band reunion....... "The Plastic Oh-No Band"

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316. At 9:25pm on 03 Jul 2008, planetmarshalluk wrote:
Daily Mail provides readers with protection from deluge of immigrants.

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317. At 9:26pm on 03 Jul 2008, markjohnojohnson wrote:
The fans of Wimbledon didn't realise that the tough new 'plastic bag' restrictions as airports, would be enforced rigorously by the ball boys.

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318. At 9:28pm on 03 Jul 2008, FrankGrimesJnr wrote:
Team GB unveil Olympic Uniform

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319. At 9:36pm on 03 Jul 2008, beavusbob wrote:
I spy with my little eye something beginning with "L"..... ****LOSER MURRAY!!!!****

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320. At 9:37pm on 03 Jul 2008, ifapeter wrote:
The hungry woman exclaimed "this is NOT the Big Mac I ordered!"

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321. At 9:38pm on 03 Jul 2008, LordBerriman wrote:
Woman, 50, attempts to escape from the Daily Mail sack of ignorance.

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322. At 9:38pm on 03 Jul 2008, DramJam wrote:
Undercover Newsagent.

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323. At 9:38pm on 03 Jul 2008, beavusbob wrote:
E.T. Lives

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324. At 9:39pm on 03 Jul 2008, jimmer9 wrote:
Daily Mail in transparency shocker

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325. At 9:39pm on 03 Jul 2008, fintanbear wrote:
I see damp people.

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326. At 9:44pm on 03 Jul 2008, jonnyh068 wrote:
Micheal Jackson realised that plastic surgery sponsored by the Daily Mail was a mistake.

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327. At 9:46pm on 03 Jul 2008, FrankGrimesJnr wrote:
"This is John Simpson for BBC News, behind enemy lines in Basra"

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328. At 9:48pm on 03 Jul 2008, ammason999 wrote:
Yet another tabloid victim struggles ashore on Midway Island.

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329. At 9:51pm on 03 Jul 2008, ifapeter wrote:
"If I stand here long enough in this plastic cape I may get in the caption competiton photo"

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330. At 9:52pm on 03 Jul 2008, Well fan my brow. wrote:
"I hope they take the covers off soon".

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331. At 9:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, Well fan my brow. wrote:
"I'm sooo embarassed, all the others are wearing umbrellas".

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332. At 9:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, fahlin wrote:
The Wombles of Wimbledon Common took this rare photo of someone making good use of the things that they find, things that the everyday folks leave behind.

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333. At 9:58pm on 03 Jul 2008, Well fan my brow. wrote:
New! The discreet steaker outfit.

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334. At 9:59pm on 03 Jul 2008, Crystal Clear wrote:
The Government's New Recycling Initiative Goes A Step Too Far

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335. At 10:00pm on 03 Jul 2008, Wybble wrote:
A black-eyed Wimblebug emerges from its chrysalis knowing it must find Henman Hill and mate quickly in its short two-week lifespan.

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336. At 10:01pm on 03 Jul 2008, ddstretch wrote:
A renegade supermarket director shows his contemt for the drive to reduce non-recyclable packaging.

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337. At 10:04pm on 03 Jul 2008, ddstretch wrote:
A renegade supermarket director shows his contempt for the drive to reduce non-recyclable packaging.

(better get the spelling right this time!)

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338. At 10:04pm on 03 Jul 2008, flyingcaptain_kirky wrote:
ET phone home....

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339. At 10:11pm on 03 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
And as the voice of Sir Alan Sugar came over the loud speaker she heard: "You've been sacked!"

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340. At 10:11pm on 03 Jul 2008, armourplate wrote:
So... Daily Mail are sending bin bags to their Wimbledon watching readers to act as cover for the rain - or are they selling?

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341. At 10:12pm on 03 Jul 2008, Well fan my brow. wrote:
Undercover reporter.

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342. At 10:13pm on 03 Jul 2008, jonnoid wrote:
NEWSFLASH ! Daily Mail reader, Gladys Jones from Newport, Gwent tried to hide herself after reading all the stupid comments made about her on a BBC website. Ms Jones said in an interview, "I've read them all and they are not funny they're simply crap!! I'm just so glad i don't watch TV!!"

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343. At 10:13pm on 03 Jul 2008, armourplate wrote:
Rain rain go away come back another day

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344. At 10:13pm on 03 Jul 2008, curtainsforyou wrote:
NEW OUT NOW!
The all over protection against taxually transmitted diseases!

Protect yourself from the government, save what's left in your sack!
SAVE YOUR ECONOMY NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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345. At 10:14pm on 03 Jul 2008, Well fan my brow. wrote:
Mail exclusive!

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346. At 10:15pm on 03 Jul 2008, mattsterrrwww wrote:
The new "phoetal rebirth" attraction proved a popular addition to this year's Wimbledon.

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347. At 10:16pm on 03 Jul 2008, Well fan my brow. wrote:
Reader offer. Free person with every paper.

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348. At 10:16pm on 03 Jul 2008, NickWiltshire wrote:
...feeding time on centre court, as an official tentitively opts for a second herring.

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349. At 10:21pm on 03 Jul 2008, glennog wrote:
"I don't know, you wait all week for a shower then three come at once!"

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350. At 10:22pm on 03 Jul 2008, insideyourbrain wrote:
The faceless now has been named!

It's Daily Mail :))

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351. At 10:24pm on 03 Jul 2008, sidsidders wrote:
I remember doing this 36 years ago.......

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352. At 10:25pm on 03 Jul 2008, jonnoid wrote:
NEWSFLASH!!! Cash strapped Brits take on new rainwear fashion!!

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353. At 10:25pm on 03 Jul 2008, Vicky S wrote:
This time Gilbert was sure that he had discovered the secret of invisibility.

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354. At 10:25pm on 03 Jul 2008, gthebounceranddavincimaster wrote:
David Attenborough voice'....and then slowly the Daily Mail reader is finally pushed out into the world, with his or her own prejudices already formed to combat house prices, immigration and whatever else the editorial suggests.'

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355. At 10:31pm on 03 Jul 2008, ThaiNemesis wrote:
"There's nothing to worry about, Mrs Parsons...it's a routine operation."

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356. At 10:31pm on 03 Jul 2008, PhilipStevens wrote:
The Queen regrets asking the cash strapped Daily Mail to design her new raincoat.

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357. At 10:32pm on 03 Jul 2008, Vicky S wrote:
With sunglasses, a mac and plenty of light reading Gilbert felt sure he had covered every eventuality for his day out at Court 18.

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358. At 10:33pm on 03 Jul 2008, AlanCarroll wrote:
As the series finale approaches, cutbacks at the BBC mean that the Doctor's nemesis is not as scary as we had feared.

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359. At 10:34pm on 03 Jul 2008, mikemjh wrote:
wheres the phone - i need to phone home

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360. At 10:34pm on 03 Jul 2008, pmapitkanen wrote:
Wow, this lob is really flying high...

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361. At 10:35pm on 03 Jul 2008, mikemjh wrote:
So this is what earthlings do at the weekends

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362. At 10:36pm on 03 Jul 2008, flamebrain63 wrote:
The Daily Mail's attempt to branch into the condom market was met with failure after a fatal flaw was discovered

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363. At 10:39pm on 03 Jul 2008, mikemjh wrote:
Cliff! Sir Cliff! Where are you?

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364. At 10:40pm on 03 Jul 2008, Jimbobjeff85 wrote:
Even the crowd take cover against Nadal's frightening forehand in his match against Murray.

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365. At 10:42pm on 03 Jul 2008, James_Dann wrote:
The Daily Mail clearly supports Wimbledon

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366. At 10:45pm on 03 Jul 2008, TimSC1 wrote:
Posh's outfit served well

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367. At 10:47pm on 03 Jul 2008, dave-the-save wrote:
Next up on the catwalk we have a very practical little number from the Maria "Shower"pova Wimbledon collection...perfect for when you get knocked out in the first week and have to watch the remaining matches from the cheap seats......

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368. At 10:49pm on 03 Jul 2008, Tyke Me Home wrote:
"Come On Tim!" (typical accurate Daily Mail Headline)

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369. At 10:50pm on 03 Jul 2008, fastwelshdragon wrote:
Why are you hiding Sir Cliff its raining again?

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370. At 10:50pm on 03 Jul 2008, Tyke Me Home wrote:
Andy Murray Plays "Fetch"

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371. At 10:55pm on 03 Jul 2008, petey-h wrote:
"Who told me this was a good idea? Ah, the Daily Mail. I see..."

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372. At 10:56pm on 03 Jul 2008, TimSC1 wrote:
Unfortunately the people trafficker had lied

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373. At 10:58pm on 03 Jul 2008, TimSC1 wrote:
I thought only the strawberries had to be wrapped in cling film?

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374. At 10:59pm on 03 Jul 2008, itsnotbutter wrote:
During the Federer match, Harry kept the crowd awake with his impression of a deep-sea squid eating Elton John.

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375. At 11:00pm on 03 Jul 2008, TimSC1 wrote:
At first it was cds..............

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376. At 11:00pm on 03 Jul 2008, Paul_Elmes wrote:
Follwing success of the 'Bag for Life', the Daily Mail have launched 'Mac for Life', with the slogan 'A Mac isn't just for Wimbledon, it's for Life!'

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377. At 11:02pm on 03 Jul 2008, ninepine wrote:
Clear evidence the strawberries were grown in a polytunnel this year.

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378. At 11:06pm on 03 Jul 2008, metagaia wrote:
Daily Mail Campaign: Transparent hoodie cuts hooliganism by 35%.

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379. At 11:06pm on 03 Jul 2008, Well fan my brow. wrote:
"I'm incognito". "Oh, where's that?"

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380. At 11:08pm on 03 Jul 2008, TimSC1 wrote:
when skiving, it's best to have a disguise

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381. At 11:10pm on 03 Jul 2008, TimSC1 wrote:
A bag is not just for Wimbledon

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382. At 11:11pm on 03 Jul 2008, TimSC1 wrote:
Oh no! Cliff's got in again!

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383. At 11:22pm on 03 Jul 2008, Andrew_NE wrote:
LATEST IN BIRTH CONTROL

The "WimbleDom"

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384. At 11:27pm on 03 Jul 2008, podocop wrote:
Is this a new monster for Dr Who? A Giant Bluebottle!

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385. At 11:30pm on 03 Jul 2008, rory_london wrote:
"A bag for life? You cannot be serious?!?"

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386. At 11:34pm on 03 Jul 2008, analyistsid wrote:
Can't fight your way out of a paper bag? Try something with a hole in.

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387. At 11:35pm on 03 Jul 2008, pompey_chimes wrote:
PLASTIC COVERS WOMAN AT WIMBLEDON: HOUSE PRICES CRASH

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388. At 11:36pm on 03 Jul 2008, Phunurius wrote:
No, really, honestly, Duchess, Jana is not playing this year.

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389. At 11:37pm on 03 Jul 2008, zanziman wrote:
Prophylaxis has come a long way since the space age.

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390. At 11:42pm on 03 Jul 2008, stigmondo wrote:
I dunno, ask yer Mother..

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391. At 11:44pm on 03 Jul 2008, tompharding wrote:
Forty-Forty : Ready or not, here I come...

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392. At 11:45pm on 03 Jul 2008, Greg_Munson wrote:
Half Woman; Half Caterpillar emerges from her cocoon in a new hybrid experiment sponsored by the Daily Mail.

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393. At 11:46pm on 03 Jul 2008, tatblogger wrote:
.....woman blames sunglasses for misreading boil-in-the-bag instructions

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394. At 11:49pm on 03 Jul 2008, Helenepitpony wrote:
You cannot be cir�!

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395. At 11:49pm on 03 Jul 2008, scedjs wrote:
...Wimpledon

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396. At 11:51pm on 03 Jul 2008, Helenepitpony wrote:
Er... that should have been:

"You cannot be cire!"

(Just imagine that there's a French accent on the last e.)

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397. At 11:53pm on 03 Jul 2008, stigmondo wrote:
"Earlier on today, apparently, a woman rang the BBC and said she heard there was a storm on the way... well, if you're watching, don't worry, there isn't!"

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398. At 11:54pm on 03 Jul 2008, enrico_cadillac wrote:
Officials were still unwrapping the spectators when the match started.

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399. At 11:55pm on 03 Jul 2008, Wysawyg wrote:
The cut-down budget on Dr Who villains did not meet with approval.

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400. At 11:55pm on 03 Jul 2008, JamesCMason wrote:
This is gonna be a tight squeeze, but thank god the rain has stopped.

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401. At 11:56pm on 03 Jul 2008, Helenepitpony wrote:
Kate Moss' summer collection proved an instant hit with Middle England.

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402. At 11:57pm on 03 Jul 2008, stigmondo wrote:
Pickets arrive outside the Metrological Office demanding climate change..

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403. At 00:01am on 04 Jul 2008, Jordan D wrote:
The Daily Mail launched their "hug a hoodie" campaign.

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404. At 00:01am on 04 Jul 2008, Spikenipple wrote:
The Daily Mail traps yet another unsuspecting member of the public.

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405. At 00:02am on 04 Jul 2008, DC_Daw wrote:
Celebrations at Daily Mail towers as they grasp the ultimate prize: a captive monarch.

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406. At 00:04am on 04 Jul 2008, Tremorman wrote:
No one told him the shrink wrap didn't need to get wet.

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407. At 00:05am on 04 Jul 2008, Gattieres wrote:
Staying unrecognised is good. Looking cool is good. Doing them both together often caused problems for Mr. Nicholson.

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408. At 00:06am on 04 Jul 2008, Feeder13 wrote:
Boil in the bag Daily Mail readers fails to replace strawberrys at Wimbledon.

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409. At 00:07am on 04 Jul 2008, adger560 wrote:
Daily Mail fixes Hijab

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410. At 00:07am on 04 Jul 2008, Tremorman wrote:
Rob was well dressed in Daily Mail gear after being refused entry wearing his casual Netto gear.

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411. At 00:08am on 04 Jul 2008, stigmondo wrote:
Try again..

Pickets arrive outside the Metrological Office demanding er.. climate change?

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412. At 00:11am on 04 Jul 2008, Tremorman wrote:
Having drank far too much Jed decided to don his incontinence suit

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413. At 00:14am on 04 Jul 2008, purpleprole wrote:
The monster for the season finale is revealed, and Doctor Who fans aren't overly impressed.

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414. At 00:17am on 04 Jul 2008, stigmondo wrote:
Its ok, Mr President, you can make that speech now..

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415. At 00:19am on 04 Jul 2008, stigmondo wrote:
What the best dressed allotment gardener is wearing this year..

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416. At 00:19am on 04 Jul 2008, rwm650 wrote:
Emperor Palpatine, the famously glamorised antagonist, pays a visit to Wimbledon.

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417. At 00:22am on 04 Jul 2008, Tremorman wrote:
The Wimbledon executive seats with shower in your seat facility

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418. At 00:40am on 04 Jul 2008, DireLiar wrote:
The new-look habits for Wimbledon Nunnery proved unpopular with traditionalists.

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419. At 00:41am on 04 Jul 2008, mrjameseatsdogs wrote:
The Daily Mail have released their own 'whites only' condoms.

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420. At 00:44am on 04 Jul 2008, DireLiar wrote:
A die-hard dog-lover is entangled in Clifford's makeshift doggy bag

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421. At 00:47am on 04 Jul 2008, TAHayden wrote:
It was two weeks since Clarence had received his copy of the Saturday edition of the Daily Mail, and he was almost there with unwrapping it all.

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422. At 00:52am on 04 Jul 2008, scotchollie wrote:
"Oh no! Looks like my credit bubble has just burst..!"

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423. At 00:54am on 04 Jul 2008, scotchollie wrote:
I see Mac is still in fine form at the Mail...

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424. At 00:59am on 04 Jul 2008, wildejf wrote:

Finally, a reason to buy the Daily Mail !

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425. At 01:18am on 04 Jul 2008, adamadamadamadam wrote:
World's first pregnant mac finally gives birth.

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426. At 01:19am on 04 Jul 2008, sophellow wrote:
Environmental concerns raised as cinics recycle Murray fans for next year.

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427. At 01:36am on 04 Jul 2008, jellybelly1497 wrote:
WOW! it's a new species of Jellyfish! The scyphozoa wimbledonia!

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428. At 01:54am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Girl soon regrets having beans for lunch

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429. At 01:54am on 04 Jul 2008, whencut wrote:
Hydrophobic fan (apparently) not claustrophobic.

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430. At 01:56am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
This interactive newspaper is just like watching the tennis live .... where's the red button?

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431. At 01:59am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Britney Spears attacked by stray kite

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432. At 02:00am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Disgruntled husband takes umbrige at wifes comment of "I feel like chips"

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433. At 02:02am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Osama Bin Laden never misses Wimbledon

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434. At 02:04am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Daily mail showing its other use

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435. At 02:06am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
*snif*snif* ..... smells like *snif* ... Chris Moyles

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436. At 02:08am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
"Help me I'm meltingggg .... "

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437. At 02:10am on 04 Jul 2008, whencut wrote:
Ticketless fan caught trying to get in dressed as a newspaper.

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438. At 02:10am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Boris Becker finally comes out the closet

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439. At 02:13am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Andy Murray Mint gets stalked by giant Fox's Glacier Mint

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440. At 02:14am on 04 Jul 2008, timdickinson wrote:
A woman tries to free herself from a clever new Daily Mail man-trap.

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441. At 02:14am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
"Phoooone Hooooome"

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442. At 02:16am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Smallest woman alive struck by sweetie wrapper

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443. At 02:17am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart
This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.
444. At 02:18am on 04 Jul 2008, ThisMacaroon wrote:
Is it a plane? Is it a bird? Or is it Hen-man...?

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445. At 02:20am on 04 Jul 2008, tnutty9000 wrote:
Help-im trapped in a giant condom

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446. At 02:21am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Chris DeBurg seranades girl with "The lady in read....."

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447. At 02:25am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Associated Newspapers reject claims that it's publications give a filtered view of current events

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448. At 02:27am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Jonny Rotten still traumatised by croud spitting

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449. At 02:27am on 04 Jul 2008, littleDickie wrote:
Wet balls are a terrible thing...

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450. At 02:30am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Dawn Cocktail attends wimbledon in her finest

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451. At 02:31am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Denied whales, the Japanese turn to alternative prey

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452. At 02:32am on 04 Jul 2008, littleDickie wrote:
" Yer lug'oles are blocked, I know. I've said it before, I said Me and Trevor are in here and the other lads are in the Volvo!"

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453. At 02:38am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Uncle Ben's new product - Anneka Rice

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454. At 02:40am on 04 Jul 2008, canvasmyart wrote:
Barry Manilow sneezes on croud

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455. At 03:33am on 04 Jul 2008, Johnguinnard wrote:
Not a very funny joke - we can see right through it

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456. At 03:38am on 04 Jul 2008, Johnguinnard wrote:
Did Anybody Indicate Loadsa You Might Accept In Lycra?

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457. At 03:38am on 04 Jul 2008, antdav24 wrote:
I was sure I saw a TV guide in here somewhere

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458. At 03:47am on 04 Jul 2008, ELIVSLIVES wrote:
HERE WE SEE THE VERY RARE TENNIS TWITCHER .. LOOKING FOR SIR CLIFF

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459. At 04:15am on 04 Jul 2008, plowter_dubs wrote:
Dr Who fans, frustrated by budget cutbacks, are disappointed by the latest monster - the Ka'Ghool.

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460. At 04:32am on 04 Jul 2008, rosyinoz wrote:
Are we there yet?

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461. At 05:27am on 04 Jul 2008, Maurstar wrote:
I went to Wimbledon and all I got was this lousy plastic poncho

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462. At 05:36am on 04 Jul 2008, ichbineinfrankfurter wrote:
Baby tennis players grunt before they hatch. And sometimes afterwards.

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463. At 06:38am on 04 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
"Ze rain, ze rain!"

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464. At 06:48am on 04 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
The rain of Spain and falls mainly on the slain

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465. At 06:49am on 04 Jul 2008, Candace9839 wrote:
Correctly this time...

The rain of Spain falls mainly on the slain

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466. At 06:54am on 04 Jul 2008, Jordan D wrote:
The suffering veil of the Daily Mail continues to effect people ...

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467. At 06:58am on 04 Jul 2008, BillyBongoBubs wrote:
Do my nostrils look big in ths?

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468. At 07:00am on 04 Jul 2008, scotchollie wrote:
First it was Cliff Richard in the rain. Now it's some unknown (w)rapper...

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469. At 07:00am on 04 Jul 2008, BettyHur wrote:
"Ace, Same Wet and Patch!".

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470. At 07:04am on 04 Jul 2008, furtlefinch wrote:
Do you like my new see-thru burkah?

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471. At 07:16am on 04 Jul 2008, thickmanager wrote:
Looks like the 'Mails' got this one in the bag.

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472. At 07:21am on 04 Jul 2008, DavidDeeMoz wrote:
Kevin told his mum he wanted to look like a Rapper

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473. At 07:25am on 04 Jul 2008, thickmanager wrote:
looks like the 'Mails' got this one in the bag.

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474. At 07:31am on 04 Jul 2008, the-observer wrote:
The Daily Mail editorial team demonstrates to ministers its offer to shrink-wrap the first thousand asylum seekers for the journey home.

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475. At 07:33am on 04 Jul 2008, derekcohen wrote:
during the rain Davros was wheeled out to take pot shots at the linesmen to entertain the crowds

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476. At 07:41am on 04 Jul 2008, wamt74 wrote:
Not a toy ? can cause suffocation.

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477. At 07:42am on 04 Jul 2008, wamt74 wrote:
Not a toy, may cause suffocation

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478. At 07:43am on 04 Jul 2008, UKV1679 wrote:
Fresh from his interview with Scott Mills and desperate to get to wimbledon, David Hasselhoff gets lost in the rain and ends up tunnelling through the court covers

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479. At 07:43am on 04 Jul 2008, tjforrestuk wrote:
Construction on Centre Court at Wimbledon on schedule but some fans find that having to dig your way to their seats, a little too much.

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480. At 07:44am on 04 Jul 2008, chrisorr2 wrote:
Climate change delays matches at Dubai Tennis Open

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481. At 07:48am on 04 Jul 2008, sarahtrieste wrote:
In case the pigeons shoot back.......

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482. At 07:50am on 04 Jul 2008, mercur1al wrote:
Demonstration that the Daily Mail also impairs one's ability to read the weather.

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483. At 07:54am on 04 Jul 2008, krazzyamesy wrote:
"Beam me up please Andy"

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484. At 07:57am on 04 Jul 2008, Cheese_fest wrote:
"New shawls please"

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485. At 07:59am on 04 Jul 2008, sarahtrieste wrote:
Kilroy was here.

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486. At 08:06am on 04 Jul 2008, sarahtrieste wrote:
Another "cover-up" article from the Mail.

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487. At 08:07am on 04 Jul 2008, aussacpete wrote:
Another full day of news from the Daily Mail

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488. At 08:07am on 04 Jul 2008, bexilou wrote:
The Daily Mail had taken its new teenage contraception idea straight to the top!

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489. At 08:08am on 04 Jul 2008, sarahtrieste wrote:
or

Another "under-cover" article from the Mail.

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490. At 08:11am on 04 Jul 2008, LondonToozie wrote:
Cannibal supermarkets in trouble again over excess packaging...

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491. At 08:13am on 04 Jul 2008, Squarsifa wrote:
Let the rain begin.

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492. At 08:16am on 04 Jul 2008, davidg2008 wrote:
With the departure of Russell T. Davies, Doctor Who budgets just weren't what they used to be...

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493. At 08:20am on 04 Jul 2008, KarenKomment wrote:
MP returns from Holiday to find second home allowance has been discontinued

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494. At 08:20am on 04 Jul 2008, SilentBart wrote:
The Daily Mail provides yet another narrow, blinkered view of British Society

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495. At 08:22am on 04 Jul 2008, francisfrench wrote:
Sheik, dressed for Wimbledon gorging on chipolatas during rain break

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496. At 08:23am on 04 Jul 2008, KarenKomment wrote:
MP living rough after returning home from holiday and finding second home allowance has been discontinued

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497. At 08:24am on 04 Jul 2008, chrisrusby wrote:
Daily Hail?

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498. At 08:39am on 04 Jul 2008, budgeblog wrote:
look,up in the sky...is it a bird...is it a plane...no... it's THE SUN.

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499. At 08:42am on 04 Jul 2008, jtotheglo wrote:
Spoiler reveal birth of latest Doctor Who villian:

The Daily Mail paparazzi!

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500. At 08:46am on 04 Jul 2008, gavlad999 wrote:
Roy Orbison's time on Dr. Who is short-lived as he's devoured by the terrifying 'Mail' monster from the planet Aily.

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