09:35 UK time, Thursday, 12 November 2009
"Initially it's like medicine but I've got used to it now" - Liz Hurley on switching from wine to vodka.
In news that will rock the wine industry, sometime actress Liz Hurley is reported to be switching her drinks in order to retain her svelte figure.
More details (Daily Mail)
17:24 UK time, Wednesday, 11 November 2009
A celebration of the riches of the web.
Today in Web Monitor: joking aside, last requests and more noughties nostalgia.
• Johnny Vegas is joining a long line of comics complaining about the problems of gag-snatching. In the Independent blog Vegas argues that if a joke has been stolen, but it's difficult to prove, it all comes down to how guilty the thief feels about taking it:
"The saddest thing is though; little is ever said to the perpetrators themselves. Their shameless audacity often leaves its victims dumbstruck, almost fearful to protest. I myself have sat in dressing rooms, feeling like a pensioner asked to point out a mugger from a police line-up, but without the security of a one-way mirror (although I'd best point out first, before every other comic does, that the contents of my comedic purse were wholly sentimental and worth nothing of any real critical value)."
• Christopher Beam In Slate asks what prisoners on death row ask for as their last meal. Although the a cheeseburger is the most popular, he finds the requests are often memorable:
"Karla Faye Tucker requested a fruit plate but didn't eat it. John Wayne Gacy asked for shrimp, fried chicken, French fries, and a pound of strawberries. Timothy McVeigh ate two pints of mint chocolate chip ice cream. Instead of a last meal, Tennessee convict Philip Workman requested that pizza be distributed to the homeless in Nashville. (Prison officials denied his request, but local groups passed out pizza in his honor.) Before his execution in 2000, convicted rapist and murderer Odell Barnes requested a last meal of 'Justice, Equality, World Peace.' In 1992, Arkansas convict Ricky Ray Rector, who had brain damage from shooting himself in the head after killing a police officer, ate a final meal of steak, fried chicken, and cherry Kool-Aid, but famously said he wanted to save his pecan pie for later."
• Noughties nostalgia continues (see Monday's Web Monitor) with Simon Reynolds in the Guardian music blog. His notable bit of the noughties is the growth of the beard. Reynolds observes that the beard isn't just there to keep you warm:
"The beard has become one of the crucial, era-defining signifiers for non-mainstream rock in the noughties.
That's particularly the case in the United States, where whiskers have an obvious fit with Americana genres like alt-country and free folk. But things have also taken a hirsute turn in the UK this past decade... beardedness is tantamount to a visual rhetoric, almost a form of authentication, as though the band are wearing their music on their faces."
Send in your favourite summing up of the last ten years via the letterbox to the right of this page.
16:12 UK time, Wednesday, 11 November 2009
Re Project Laundry and Americans' attitudes to washing lines (Web Monitor), in the game Sim City 4, one of the signs that a property is going to the dogs is a washing line appearing in the garden. A little bit geeky, but true.
Louise, Botto
Re Noisy sex woman loses appeal bid: The council is reported as measuring sound levels of "47 decibels". That's "average residence noise", according to noise charts. Am I missing out on something at home?
Steve-O, Sheffield
Is there a fexionary entry for the feeling of wanting to read a news story which is dominating the 'most read' chart, but not daring to because you are at work? You know the one I mean.
Ken, Cheslmsford
Monitor note: This one, perchance?
Sarah (Tuesday letters), who wants a word for the nagging fear that you have just typed utter babble - for many of us this state is called "normality".
Graham, Hayle
Sarah, I believe it is called "blogging".
Ben, Bournemouth
Provided you restricted yourself to 140 characters of utter babble, it's called "twittering".
Tim, Helston
Rachel (Tuesday letters), the most reliable way to tell if age is creeping up on you is whether you have noticed how young policemen look these days. BTW, did anyone else who was watching Sunday's Remembrance ceremony at the Cenotaph notice how young our new First Sea Lord looks?
Adam, London, UK
Rachel, I have started reading Monitor letters, laughing and only then realising that it was I who wrote it. My memory's not what it used to be.
Rob, London
Rachel, the other day I saved an empty jar because I thought it was "a useful size". I'm only 25.
Jenny, Manchester, UK
You know when you're old when:
Dear Rob, First of all I'd like to say how much I look forward to reading your contributions to the Monitor (Tuesday letters). Your easy style and wonderfully witty comments make great copy. It's always a fortunate day for us all when your comments are included. I would also like to congratulate you on your recent good fortune, would that Lady Luck was smiling at me a bit more these days, but sadly she turns her face away from me. I have to say that loan of a few pounds would make all the difference to my life...
Vicky, East London
Judging by the number of Tuesday's letters that are from across the Atlantic, I think I've spotted the loop-hole in how to get this one published...
Martin, High Wycombe, US (not really)
12:39 UK time, Wednesday, 11 November 2009
A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Once upon a time they were rivals, but in recent years the fortunes of the once-mighty Daily Express and the currently-mighty Daily Mail have diverged.
But today Paper Monitor is reminded that they can still sing from the same hymn sheet.
On page 12 of the Express and page 14 of the Mail there are full page opinion pieces that, while not identical twins, are certainly hard to tell apart.
The Express headline reads: "Brown is a failure but even he does not deserve this."
That in the Mail says: "I loathe Gordon Brown's politics. But surely he doesn't deserve the mauling he has received for trying to offer condolences."
And the confluence of the opening paragraphs is eerie.
In the Mail:
"When it comes to my general disdain for Gordon Brown the politician, I yield to few people. I deplore almost everything he has done in the past two years as Prime Minister, and the ten years before that as Chancellor."
And over in the Express:
"This newspaper yields to nobody in its low opinion of Gordon Brown's leadership of the country. We said when he first became Prime Minister that he was not fit to do the job and have been taking him to task for his multiple failings ever since."
So, just to clarify, nobody is yielding.
The pieces are both about the Sun's attack on the state of Gordon Brown's handwriting, revealed in the letter to bereaved mother Jacqui Janes, who lost her son in Afghanistan.
And both take roughly the same position: Brown rubbish leader, letter very messy, hats off for writing to all the bereaved, Sun nasty.
The Mail's leader goes even further than the opinion piece by Stephen Robinson. It comes very close to criticising Mrs Janes when it says:
"So wasn't there something discreditable about the way this private conversation was recorded and published as part of a campaign against his conduct of the war?"
09:38 UK time, Wednesday, 11 November 2009
"You adore music more than anything in the world, you have a great passion, but that doesn't mean you had to marry the lead singer of every band you ever had a poster of on your bedroom wall" - Patsy Kensit in a letter to her 16-year-old self.
After notching up Dan Donovan (Big Audio Dynamite), Jim Kerr (Simple Minds) and Liam Gallagher (Oasis), La Kensit has now pledged her troth to Jeremy Healy (DJ/Haysi Fantayzee). But she still feels moved to communicate with her younger self in the form of a book for charity full of celebrities' advice.
More details (Daily Express)
17:25 UK time, Tuesday, 10 November 2009
A celebration of the riches of the web.
Today in Web Monitor: not mellowing with age, the micro-celebrity and why we still have receipts.
• Actor Robert Downey Jr is back on the A-List, says Scott Raab at Esquire. At 44 Downey's not afraid to admit he doesn't feel like he's getting wiser with age:
"I hand it to any and everyone who has made it past their late thirties and has any sense of contentment, because you know so much, and the anxiety can be so overwhelming - and managing the anxiety is a skill set that seems like a menu that changes every day."
• How many fans are the perfect amount for a musician to make a living?
In the brave new musical world, the founding editor of Wired magazine Kevin Kelly suggests the future for musicians is to cultivate a small following of really dedicated fans. He's putting the magic number of fans to earn a living at 1000. That's assuming that the so-called "true fans" will be buy everything - merchandise and all - the artist sells.
To prove this, Ariel Hyatt in Music Think Tank found musician Matthew Ebel who makes makes 26.3% of his net income from just 40 hardcore fans.
But there is now a dissenting voice, standing-up for the casual fan. The Fingertips music blog argues that overlooking the importance of a mass of listeners who don't worship you will bring on an age of infinite bad music:
"If everyone now thinks they only need 1,000 fans to make it as a musician, then yikes - you won't believe how many more people will be out there trying to do just that.And that, to me, is the biggest indictment of this well-intended but not well-thought-out idea: that it will in fact be a beacon of hope for 'vanity press' musicians who write and sing and record songs that they should not even be sharing with their friends, never mind 1,000 strangers. No matter how untalented and unpromising any one person with a Mac and a dream may be, he or she will be nothing but inspired to know that all they need are 1,000 fans and they can be a full-time, professional musician. Why, most of them probably have at least 600 Facebook friends. That sounds like they're already more than halfway there."
• Incidentally, in this digital world, why do we still have receipts? Chadwick Matlin in Big Money asked what it would take to get rid of receipts, the answer was so costly and complicated he gave up :
"So I begrudgingly and all-too-appropriately wave my white flag. You win, receipts. You're too entrenched for us to force out in a grassroots campaign. It's up to big business to get rid of you - the credit card companies are our only hope. And for obvious reasons, that means there isn't much hope at all."
15:44 UK time, Tuesday, 10 November 2009
In addition to the perception of poverty, air drying laundry also suffers from dirty air (Web Monitor). When I was a kid, drying clothes outside in fresh air was better than using a dryer. Today, the clothes attract and absorb all kinds of strange pollutants and end up smelling odd. Plus, there's an urban privacy issue concerning undergarments hung up for all to see.
Jay, Armada MI, US
I love my solar dryer. There's something different in the way clothes smell when they're allowed to dry in the wind and the sun.
Robert Melvin, Lakewood, Colorado, US
We take great pride to hang the laundry outside for savings and mostly environmental reasons (Web Monitor). And I am talking year-round. You'll see me with boots in the snow, hurrying to hang the wash so it does not freeze before it is on the line. Once up, it dries very well - "sublimation", water goes from the frozen state right into the dry winter air. We use the electric dryer not more than twice a year, when it unpredictably rains on the laundry.
Kurt D Stottmeier, S Carver, MA, US
UK lottery winners unveiled: Now where did I put that family tree?
Dave, Cambridge
I play the Lottery every Saturday, and I'm a little worried about their announcing the winners of the £45m Euromillions. Did they have the choice (and, if so, why did they agree?). I certainly wouldn't want anybody knowing about the £10 I won last week.
Rob Falconer, Llandough, Wales
Ah, so BBC news is starting a sideline in quashing rumours? In that case, I'd like to put people straight about what didn't (and never will) happen between me and Harry. Anyone else got a use for this new service? I have a feeling they might have bitten off more than they could chew...
Louise, Oxford
Re Thriving trade in out-of-date best-before foods: Seems you've broken Approved Foods and Food Bargains - good work Magazine!
liamf1, via Twitter
Amen, Peter (Monday letters). Clearly, the worst thing about Hannah Montana is the accent, and all of us have twangs. I wish I too could be accent-free, just like the people wherever Caroline (Friday letters) is from who've managed to avoid this linguistic plague.
Nadja, north of Boston, US
I'd like to put forward the following, from this story, as a contender for quote of the day: "We'd consider the koala with the same level of diligence and dedication as if it were the death adder" - Bob Beeton, Chairman of the Australian Threatened Species Steering Committee.
Dec, Belfast
Yesterday I found myself saving an odd piece of string and a folded sheet of foil. Today I think I will begin using the phrase "Mind you...". Is this the insidious onset of age?
Rachel, Minnetonka
Can my fellow Monitorites help me? Does anyone know a word for the nagging fear that you have just typed utter babble.
Sarah, Colchester
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