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BBC BLOGS - Magazine Monitor

Your Letters

16:04 UK time, Friday, 17 July 2009

The 7 days question relating to the time that Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin walked on the moon is wrong. Neil Armstrong spent an extra 15 minutes as he was the first out and last in the lunar capsule. Try checking the Sky at Night programme.
Sophie, London

7 days SPOILER ALERT
No wonder you city folk lost this country - £6.00 for 5kg of chicken feed, get real! You get 5kg for £2.50 or 20kg for £6.00. So Boris could have got more than double the amount, well researched guys.
Rod Wallace, Lustleigh, Devon
Monitor note: Thanks Rod. Other brands of chicken feed are available.

As an employer I'm disgusted by the BBC's "Say goodbye to worktime boredom". Actively encouraging people to use Twitter/Facebook whilst they are being paid to do other things. This is just another example of Britain's attitude towards doing any actual work. Of course I doubt that you will read this as you are probably too busy twittering...
Lee, Preston

Web Monitor, as any Kenny Everett fan will tell you, Dr Gitfinger was a character in the Captain Kremmen radio series.
Jake, Newbury, Berkshire, UK

Nicolas (Thursday letters), "funky" is indeed a great addition. But where to put it?
Basil Long, Nottingham

Philip Hore (Thursday letters) asks if $23 quadrillion dollars could buy Europe. It almost certainly is enough to buy Europe, but how many times do you actually want to hear The Final Countdown?
Ben Moxon, Guildford, UK

Bieke Vanhooydonck (of the University of Antwerp). What a name! Sounds like a Douglas Adams invention. Fabulous.
Laura, Bicester

If "Dramatic Paws" doesn't win this week's caption competition, I'll eat my, um, lunch. Thank you. (And no, it isn't mine.)
Sue 'Rockahula' Lee, London
Monitor note: Hope your lunch tasted good, Sue.

Where is the page to enter the caption competition? I have been trying to enter for weeks now, and only ever get the "competition is now closed" page.
Helen, North Devon
Monitor note: Helen, you come looking just a little too late. Entries open at lunchtime on Thursdays, and close at 1230 BST Friday.

Sorry, James Ball (Thursday letters), "Penguin murders prompt sniper aid" is not an all-noun headline. "Prompt", although it can be a noun or indeed an adjective, is clearly used as a transitive verb here.
Hamish McGlobbie, Leeds

JoeA (Thursday letters), I received the joke e-mail comparing cars with computers on 25 February 1998. It was sent to me on 23 February 1998: e-mail wasn't quite as fast in those days. I don't know if that's the oldest recorded receipt of the e-mail, but as it happens, it is the oldest e-mail I still have.
Adam, London, UK

JoeA, 1997 is apparently the earliest recorded receipt of this e-mail.
Pascal, Grand Union Canal, Cowley, UK

I've never heard of Icehouse, and I've never received the e-mail imagining if a car was like a computer.
I - I don't really feel like part of the gang anymore.
*sniff*
Sue, London
Monitor note: Wait - Sue - come back! Cheese and pineapple stick?

I run an alternative hairdressing salon, and actually the mullet has been back for a while (Letters passum). It's now done with razor cutting and is more popular with young teen girls to get that "got out of bed" look. It's quite rocktastic as long as it's an excellent hairdresser doing it...
Zoey Ryland, Bristol

Caption Competition

13:15 UK time, Friday, 17 July 2009

Comments (322)

Winning entries in the Caption Competition.

The competition is now closed. Full rules can be seen here [PDF].

dogpeekredcurtain_ap.jpg

This week, a French Bulldog peeks out from the stage curtain at a dog fashion show in Taiwan. But what's being said?

Thanks to all who entered. The prize of a small amount of kudos to the following:

6. Hilaryros
"In THESE shoes? I don't think so!"

5. Candace9839
Siegfried & Roy revamp Vegas show.

4. GreatUncleBulgariaJr
"So chuck, you chose contestant number three. He's small but with a true Latin American temprament and I know you'll have a lorra, lorra fun together."

3. RMutt-Urinal
Certain members of the audience were beginning to realise that they had been conned into buying tickets which promised "Doggie Fashion - Live on Stage".

2. tomhartland
"I won't get out of my basket for anything less than ten thous... ooo, is that a biscuit??"

1. gm_coates
Spike's Eric Morecambe impression was off to a good start.

10 things we didn't know last week

13:12 UK time, Friday, 17 July 2009

10_ducks.jpgSnippets from the week's news, sliced, diced and processed for your convenience.

1. A new element cannot be named after a living person.
More details

2. Plants that smell of almonds or marzipan are more likely to be poisonous.
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3. The UK's median gross annual salary is £20,801.
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4. The best Italian saffron is made from crocus flowers picked at dawn.
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5. The world's longest bench is 613 metres.
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6. Testicular cancer only accounts for 1-2% of male cancers.
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7. Brahms liked his audience to clap in between movements.
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8. Zoos in China use female dogs as surrogate mothers for baby tigers, lions and bear cubs.
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9. Some lizards are so light they fall to the ground like a feather.
More details

10. Buzz Aldrin received Holy Communion on the moon.
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Seen 10 things? Send us a picture to use next week. Thanks to Heidi Adnum for this week's picture of 10 ducks in Hyde Park, London.


Paper Monitor

11:56 UK time, Friday, 17 July 2009

A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.

It is, perhaps, a question as old as time, dating back to, oh, at least the pre-social networking era. Who, if you could invite just about anyone, would be your ideal dinner party guests?

For Gordon Brown, who as Prime Minister has, at the very least, the opportunity to turn that fantasy into reality, the answer is revealed in today's Guardian:
Motty
Brucie
Jimmy (Carr)
Fred the Shred
Ed (Miliband)

Paper Monitor does not know the seating plan.

The paper is also to be congratulated on its colour co-ordination today, tricking out both its front page and G2 cover in an eye-catching combo of tomato red, basil green and white. But there the similarities end. "FREE Italian phrasebook" is on the front, "AMIS ON IRAN" on G2.

Meanwhile, the tabloids report on the unedifying tale of Ingrid Tarrant's parking ticket. When caught parking in a bus stop, she "roared away in her silver Saab", says the Daily Express, only to end up "wrestling on the ground" with a police officer. She says she was "petrified". He says she was "abrupt and rude". Either way, there is not much dignity left intact.

And finally, Metro persists in its efforts to label the Blue Mountains as the Outback. Which indicates that its subs don't hang on Paper Monitor's every post. Today's headline is "Backpacker's Outback ordeal 'was not a hoax'".

That's not the Outback. This is the Outback.

Weekly Bonus Question

09:50 UK time, Friday, 17 July 2009

Comments (111)

Welcome to the Weekly Bonus Question.

Each week the news quiz 7 days 7 questions will offer an answer. You are invited to suggest what the question might have been.

Suggestions should be sent using the COMMENTS BOX IN THIS ENTRY. And since nobody likes a smart alec, kudos will be deducted for predictability in your suggestions.

This week's answer is A FOX OR A DOG. But what's the question?

Daily Mini-Quiz

09:45 UK time, Friday, 17 July 2009

SPOILER ALERT

For those led here by Friday's mini-question, here are the somewhat worrying pictures of not one but three surrogate dogs nursing abandoned baby animals in China.

surrogatedogs_ap_afp.jpgLeft is the dog with the lion cubs - who frankly looks a little worried - middle is the dog with red pandas, and right is another dog with tiger cubs. Using female dogs as surrogate mothers for baby tigers and lions, bear cubs and other newborn animals is a common practice in Chinese zoos.

Friday's Quote of the Day

09:28 UK time, Friday, 17 July 2009

"I'm the queen of saying a lot and then really not having said much at all" - Actress Sandra Bullock

Brave is the actor that suggests that their every word is not a slice of brilliant pithy insight, so hats off to the star of Speed and Miss Congeniality.
More details (the Times)

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