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Diving me crazy

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Robbo Robson | 11:35 UK time, Friday, 28 August 2009

Did you see that swarm of angry bees at the Emirates on Wednesday night?

What a terrible away kit that is, my Celtic friends - pipped only by the knockdown ebay deckchair fabric on offer when Newcastle United come to visit.

Any road, Scott Brown, Snr Donati and all were desperate to get their stingers into one Eduardo da Simulata's face after he plunged to the turf in the box. It was such a sentimental piece of play-acting I could almost smell the whiff of the caps in me cowboy gun going off as he hit the deck.

There are many of us who suspect that football is becoming a non-contact sport and looking at the Boruc-Eduardo incident I've not changed me mind. For the record the regulars at The Blue Bell love it when Celtic play 'cos you can always strike up the same conversation with an irregular in the pub:
Eduardo and Scott BrownCeltic's Scott Brown was unhappy with Eduardo's antics

"Excuse me mate. What's the name of the Celtic keeper?"
"Boruc"
"All right, mate I only asked!"

I tell you it's a laugh a flaming minute down our gaff.

Wenger adjusted his official line of 'I didn't see it' to 'he was probably trying to get out of the way what with his horribly shattered leg only just being fixed 'n' that'.

It's a persuasive argument. I'd use it meself if he was my kid playing in my team. I don't want to even think about the state of that lad's leg ever again.

But the fact is that Eduardo's headlong theatrical plummet was symptomatic of a great malaise in our game. Namely that a forward passing a prone keeper is pretty much programmed to go down these days - even one who can appreciate how lucky he is to still be playing the beautiful game.

An onrushing goalie makes 'em stumble just as surely as Pavlov's dogs used to salivate. The fall is as inevitable as the sulk of a defeated Benitez or the jeers of a temporarily let-down Aston Villa fan.

So what to do about this flagrant and cowardly conmanship?The Scots are up for banning folks for a couple of matches - and Eduardo has now been charged by Uefa - but the point with the Gooners is that the damage has been done. The lad stepped up and slotted the pen and it was Game Over.

Anyway, what you want to do is change the players' behaviour and to me there is only one route: humiliation. Here's how I'd go about it:

1.If someone is pretty much proved to be a diver then they should be treated as one. Don't ban them. Make them play the next game in mask and flippers. Forty-five minutes of Eduardo togged up like Jacques Bloomin Cousteau charging up and down the left flank should make him change his ways.

2. If you do want to enforce a ban then don't let the sneaky little oik have the afternoon off. Clad him out in the wetsuit and the oxygen tanks and make him watch the game through the walls of a water-filled glass cube on the touchline.

Maybe Noel Edmonds could do that hilarious filling the tank with gunk thing that he used to do on House Party. Lord, I miss Edmonds. Covering someone with tons of funny-coloured paint is just about as hilarious as life can get!

3. Send the offender to primary schools across the local area and get them to look into the Disney innocent eyes of the child-fans and get him to explain what the hell he was trying to do as he flopped on to the floor like some two-bit model onto a mattress in a cut-price bed commercial. See how they respond when some naive waif with teary eyes bleats "Say it ain't so, Eduardo".

4. Pursuing the diving theme, give them a good five-game ban and get them to spend that time joining in with one of them macho muppets that makes nature TV programmes about Wild And Dangerous Creatures.

In short, get them swimming with sharks in just their underpants. None of this iron cage on a cable rubbish either. Just the cheating little tumbler and a pack of toothy cartilaginous killing machines and a numpty with an in-mask mike shouting "Isn't this Brilliant, Stevie G!?" To be fair Mr Gerrard has on at least one occasion been marked by one J Barton so it's hardly going to terrify the lad to be submerged in the company of a Great White.

5. A Tom Daley masterclass - from the highest board you can find (brown trunks obligatory I would guess).

6. Failing this we must acknowledge and embrace the concept of simulation within the game and allow each team to nominate their designated diver. (A regular poster invented this term - please take the credit yourself son or I'll start telling everyone that I was the genius that came up with it).
Cristiano Ronaldo
One of our divers is missing - Ronaldo has moved on
The designated diver would be the only player allowed to collapse like a half-price self-assembly bookcase. Everyone else would be ignored if they got clogged in the box but the designated diver, subject to the scores proffered by a panel of nine faceless judges, could earn penalties for his side by legitimately cheating. Could be a winner.

I haven't passed comment on goings-on at Upton Park this week. There's not been a lot of hooliganism at the Riverside for the last 10 years or more. I was caught square in the face by a rogue parmo two years back - the hot cheese left a nasty blister and the garlic sauce doesn't half sting your eyes. That's the least the Irons and Miwwaww 'fans' involved deserve.

I'd use the CCTV pics to ID them and then the whole bunch of 30-something, beer-gutted brain-dead no-mates with no moral compass can become the guinea-pigs for a prototype floating prison.

Push 'em off at Falmouth - no prison officers need be involved bar locking them in - and let em drift towards God knows where while the rest of us watch the football.

(Although we could let some of em - if they behave well - jump into the ocean with errant Arsenal forwards and those lovely sharks)

Comments

  • 1. At 1:08pm on 28 Aug 2009, poolian wrote:

    well, yes. Fairly funny blog robbo (not your best), but importantly, something serious needs to be done about diving. 2 matches doesnt really cut it. the team should have 2 points deducted for every three simulations. enough is enough.

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  • 2. At 1:10pm on 28 Aug 2009, Craig wrote:

    I would love to know how journalists are appointed by the BBC after reading this drivel.

    Same old tired cliche's rattled out

    JOG ON Robbo

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  • 3. At 1:12pm on 28 Aug 2009, sirjimbobjunior wrote:

    Eduardo seems to be getting a lot of coverage i dont remeber all this when ronaldo,gerrard and drogba dived 15 times a game. bit of an over reaction to someone thats been caught once compared to those persistent offenders

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  • 4. At 1:18pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    We have a new complainer this week already. Should you be in bed now if you are on the night shift?

    Some nice lines this week Robbo, can't wait for the designated diver inventor coming on giving it loads! Are you paying him a royalty?

    And surely if you got hit in the face with a Parmo a couple of years ago it would have been easily enough to find the culprit. He would have been the other Boro fan.

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  • 5. At 1:21pm on 28 Aug 2009, Dunc wrote:

    I whole heartedly disagree with your comments on Noel Edmonds. Quite frankly he can royally do one. There is far too much of that over-dramatic, thick-headed dullard on our screens as it is.

    Agree with pretty much everything else though, particularly casting the hooligans adrift.

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  • 6. At 1:21pm on 28 Aug 2009, Gasheadshaun wrote:

    "I would love to know how journalists are appointed by the BBC after reading this drivel."

    "Same old tired cliche's rattled out"

    "JOG ON Robbo"


    I would love to know why the above moron continues to read articles that he clearly doesn't appreciate. Get a sense of humour or go collect stamps and stay quiet.

    Good blog Robbo, not the best, but funny all the same.

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  • 7. At 1:22pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    And we already have an Arsenal fan on, I fully expect hundreds more with their lame excuses and whiter than white mentality.

    But that's only if they can get their oar in between all the Pool fans about to descend with the Benitez backlash after Robbo accusing him of sulking in defeat. Mind you there will be plenty of opportunity for proving Benitez sulks in defeat throughout the season.

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  • 8. At 1:27pm on 28 Aug 2009, Spitfire wrote:

    Its a cunning plan, it is.

    He has just started diving. Next he'll score a bunch load of goals and help us win Champions League. Then in about 3 years time we'll sell him to City for enough dosh to wipe out or debt and rename the Emirates Stadium.

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  • 9. At 1:28pm on 28 Aug 2009, Craig wrote:

    "I would love to know how journalists are appointed by the BBC after reading this drivel."

    "Same old tired cliche's rattled out"

    "JOG ON Robbo"


    I would love to know why the above moron continues to read articles that he clearly doesn't appreciate. Get a sense of humour or go collect stamps and stay quiet.

    Good blog Robbo, not the best, but funny all the same.

    ---------------------------

    not funny never funny

    gashead? haha get a life son


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  • 10. At 1:29pm on 28 Aug 2009, John Lias wrote:

    Poster number 2 :

    "I would love to know how journalists are appointed by the BBC after reading this drivel."

    "Same old tired cliche's rattled out"

    "JOG ON Robbo"


    While I find Robbo's " me cowboy gun " rather than " my cowboy gun " northern bloke persona pretty tiresome at least he realises, as a journalist, that there is no apostrophe needed in " cliches "



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  • 11. At 1:30pm on 28 Aug 2009, MattyGaston23 wrote:

    There's a difference between a dive and over-exaggerating contact. And sometimes, players like Ronaldo, Eduardo, even Ashley Young, move at such speed that it dosent take much to knock them over.

    Yes, i hate cheats, i hate diving, but i think it is ridiculous that the governing bodies are allowed to use technology to discipline Eduardo, but they cant use it on goal lines, or to even give legit goals (crystal palace).

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  • 12. At 1:31pm on 28 Aug 2009, boyracerfred wrote:

    not your usual quality.
    no mention of Ash Young?
    put your words in early, eh?

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  • 13. At 1:36pm on 28 Aug 2009, Spitfire wrote:

    #11. Well said Sir! Either use technology or dont.

    He is neither the first nor the last to dive. At least, with his experience of the horrible injury he would have a half decent excuse. The way Boruc was coming at him, I might have not dived my self, but surely would have trampled on the charging bull or anything else that would ensure I dont break my leg a second time.

    Still makes me cringe. He is such a fine player that he didnt need to do it

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  • 14. At 1:42pm on 28 Aug 2009, PaulMcShane wrote:

    I thought I'd give this blog another peek to see if anything has changed. In short, no. Same old tired humour and Gaz Utd about to go on another 50 post charge. Get a job son

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  • 15. At 1:42pm on 28 Aug 2009, CurlyFriesFan wrote:

    Eduardo got it wrong - he expected contact and readied himself to take the penalty on offer. As it was Boruc pulled out of it and left Eduardo to fall under no contact.

    You know that Eduardo's not like that because he's never done it before. A misjudgement. And his public hanging in the press/media has been so OTT and disproportionate to those that regularly dive...

    This blog by the way is light-hearted and I have no issue with it whatsoever.

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  • 16. At 1:43pm on 28 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    Good morning Campers. If the pillocks that do it get punished enough then they'll stop doing it, however, that demands that the referee has his bloody eyes open and half a clue in his head. Until they get that sorted out the over-paid pansies have no incentive (least of all an in-built ethic) to play fair. They dive, they con the ref = a pen = a goal = success = cash. So, I'm all in favour of Pt.4 of the plan. A 5 game ban for each offense (proven by video evidence after the booking/sending off). We might see a few miss half the season but it'll be their loss, not ours.

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  • 17. At 1:43pm on 28 Aug 2009, palace_mark wrote:

    I dont know why the same tiresome people come onto this blog every time it is posted, slate the wit, slate the jokes, slate the "northern persona" and generally, everything else.
    We all know what to expect from this blog, so why keep coming back?
    What we didnt expect was the happenings at Selhurst Park last night.
    Was brimming with pride for a full hour or so last night at the valiant effort that the boys put in. Victor Moses was fantastic, and i now see why we will be flogging him off to wigan for less than he is worth.............
    Shame we cant play like that every week!!
    Oh yes, and as for the Eduardo "dive", fair play, it was not a pen, but at least it looked like it was.
    I do not condone diving, and the tirades that were aimed at good old AJ when we were in the prem was ridiculous, but it happens, it is now part of the game, as it has been in the other european leagues for years. We want the best players in europe to play over here, we will have to get used to their ways i am afraid!!!
    I do not understand how UEFA can intervene on this either, are they going to do it for every dive in every game in the champs league?
    If so there will be barely any players left.............

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  • 18. At 1:43pm on 28 Aug 2009, deanbag wrote:

    Tired of the whingers ... its light hearted banter. Kills 5 mins at work and i for one appreciate it for it is. Banter.

    As for the diving i think the idea of 5 officials (1 new official behind each goal line) is a very good one.

    Although i have concerns on how this will affect the lesser and non-league's where money is an issue. Much like the implentation of goaline technology.

    Some leagues simply wont be able to afford it.

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  • 19. At 1:45pm on 28 Aug 2009, whoareyablog wrote:

    Why is it that people feel the need to come on here and *review* the blog, rather than just discussing the issues raised in it, which is surely what the comments section is for?

    You sound like his schoolteacher or something:

    "fairly funny blog Robbo (not your best) (1)
    "same old tired cliches" (2)
    "not your usual quality" (12)

    all you need to add is "see me after class"!

    discuss what he's talking about - not the blog itself!!

    Yes, I'm aware that I'm not discussing the content either (quite happy to just read and enjoy it most of the time) - but these self appointed blog quality controllers do my head in!

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  • 20. At 1:46pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    "I thought I'd give this blog another peek to see if anything has changed. In short, no. Same old tired humour and Gaz Utd about to go on another 50 post charge. Get a job son"

    ---


    Great, does that mean you won't be back then?

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  • 21. At 1:47pm on 28 Aug 2009, Sir T. Fireball wrote:

    I've combined the hooliganism and diving problems and come up with a common solution - any player caught diving will be locked in a room with a few hooligans for half an hour with permission to do whatever they like to him on the condition that they behave themselves the rest of the time. That'll sort it.

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  • 22. At 1:48pm on 28 Aug 2009, PaulMcShane wrote:

    Wow that took you an entire 4 minutes to reply. Something must have interrupted your already hectic schedule

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  • 23. At 1:49pm on 28 Aug 2009, Ram-Persie wrote:

    It's all good about Eddy he dived and am ashamed of it, but what about Ashley Young's first penalty against Rapid V yesterday? Is everyone blind to the fact that he also dived or it's just the English way of only seeing non-english player's diving? In all BBC's comment's and report today not a word of it and if UEFA does nothing as well, then we all know it's time to get arsenal cos we are not collapsing as you all want!

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  • 24. At 1:50pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    The irony in your 2 minute reply is completely lost on you I suppose?

    And I thought you weren't coming back.

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  • 25. At 1:51pm on 28 Aug 2009, John Lias wrote:

    Poster 17 :

    " I dont know why the same tiresome people come onto this blog every time it is posted, slate the wit, slate the jokes, slate the "northern persona" and generally, everything else.
    We all know what to expect from this blog, so why keep coming back? "


    Every time ? This is the first time I' ve read his blog for about six weeks. And only the second time Ive ever posted anything about it.

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  • 26. At 1:53pm on 28 Aug 2009, PaulMcShane wrote:

    Yes that is one quick response from me compared to dozens you do on almost a daily basis. Honestly what else is there in your life bar this blog?

    I will be gone shortly, thankfully. This blog is well past its sell by date.

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  • 27. At 1:53pm on 28 Aug 2009, cpeskett wrote:

    To head off the comparisons with Drogba, I think you'll find that he almost never dived to win a free kick or penalty. His simulation was more the "dying swan, oh God I'm bleeding to death" type. He rarely appealed for penalties or free kicks, and seemed more intent on stopping the game so he could be treated. Thankfully, he seems to have toughened up a bit this year. No "Nancy-Boy" play-acting, little-to-no confrontation with anyone, including referees. Someone's had a word in his ear and it's stuck. Let's hope it stays for the whole season...

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  • 28. At 1:53pm on 28 Aug 2009, U14118702 wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 29. At 1:54pm on 28 Aug 2009, AriesBlue wrote:

    Like your ideas, Robbo, especially number two, except I think the glass cube should be placed among the supporters of the team they cheated in their next home game. I'm a Chelsea fan and I don't like Drogba's occasional unwarranted trips to the turf any more than Eduardo's or Ronaldo's. Maybe the manager should be fined heavily as well as the player, I bet that would stop the diving and the excuses! Alongside video technology for penalty decisions, of course.

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  • 30. At 1:56pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 31. At 1:58pm on 28 Aug 2009, collie21 wrote:

    Cheating.....or diving, ...........as you lot call it. Is part of the game in Europe. It's not considered cheating. The Germans the Italians the French The dutch the all do it, and they all win something too, or come a lot closer than most teams. The thing that browns me off however, is you lot think no English player does it. I reckon a retrospective red card for first offence, as it's a professional foul. If repeated in the season a six game ban.

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  • 32. At 1:58pm on 28 Aug 2009, Dicto99 wrote:


    Enjoy the column though never bothered to comment before but this diving malarkey gets on my nerves!!
    #3 It's not about Eduardo necessarily, it's just that at this time of the year we all have high hopes of a good season (same as for a title/a cup/promotion/not relegation(!) for our own teams). Seeing this so early on just reminds us of the negative bits we also have to endure - same for crowd violence... - and it's not good enough. Accepting that something may as well continue just because it happened in the past is never the answer - banker's bonuses?
    Having a citing panel available for clubs to appeal to after a round of matches cannot be too hard to establish. Then, as with other sports, any gamesmanship can be reviewed afterwards at request. Intentional handballs, dives, off-the-ball fouls etc. can all be treated in a calm and consistent manner. It's sure to make players & coaches think twice and, therefore, the game fairer. If you can appeal against a yellow/red card then why not for one?

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  • 33. At 1:58pm on 28 Aug 2009, AlvinsBaldHead wrote:

    I don't like to see diving it is cheating after all but I do enjoy the fact that referees make mistakes it's all part of the game so you can keep your goal line technology. Stupid decisions are part of the game and keep us debating it for....eeerrr how long ago was 1966?
    just like to raise a point on the other side of the coin ie. the player that tries to stay on his feet. Does his best to play fairly but would certainly never get a penalty decision yet the one that throws himself to the ground when breathed on does. Probably goes a long way to explaining why players go down so easily
    Great blog as always You're all right for a chemical city lad (albeit with the 'greenest' stadium in the land

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  • 34. At 2:00pm on 28 Aug 2009, chuchugaga wrote:

    I don't get the Boruc joke. Anyone?

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  • 35. At 2:01pm on 28 Aug 2009, mape_ventura wrote:

    Good blog Robbo, just have one bone of contention... you say you got hit in the face by a parmo, i don't believe you, not even 'gazutdisgay' would have enough hatred to dispense with a perfectly good parmo...

    If we went down the designated diver route, i wouldn't be surpries to see the Middle-Eastlanders break the bank to get hold of that Daley lad...

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  • 36. At 2:02pm on 28 Aug 2009, Bhoycie06 wrote:

    As someone else said - you know what you get from the blog so if you dont like it why keep reading it?! It is the alternative blog to the ones by Phil McNulty, Mihir Bose etc (which are i enjoy too). A lighter hearted way of discussing things but still major talking points highlighted nonetheless. Stick at it Robbo.

    As a celtic man, i was disappointed in Eduardo, a player i had built up a genuine like for after fighting back from his injury, now however i will always remember he cheated to win a penalty and kill off the tie. Admittedly it was 99% certain the gunners would of qualified anyway. Just sad seeing him do that and leaving Boruc to be left feeling sick to his stomach.

    As for the shirt, Robbo, the bumble bee is the smartest thing about!!

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  • 37. At 2:03pm on 28 Aug 2009, Zootmac wrote:

    The reference to Pavlov's Dogs reminded me of a Millwall fan I used to see in the pub in the 80s. Every time last bell came, he began salivating in anticipation of chips.

    I used to wonder what ever became of him. Then I saw the pictures of that fat bloke invading to pitch at West Ham. And you know what? It wasn't him!

    Funny old world.

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  • 38. At 2:05pm on 28 Aug 2009, oldstafford wrote:

    Stop saying 'well look at the other teams player, they do it as well'.
    It's cheating whoever does it. Even if he thought he was going to get clobbered and pre-empted it he cheated. Yes some players who run quicker will fall down a lot easier and these instances are closer to call but when it's blatant they should be punished. (I like the idea of the managers/coaches being fined as well).
    Saying that obviously because of what happened to him it may have been in the back/fore of his mind and he isn't usually a player who would dive.
    Unfortunate...but still a cheat.

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  • 39. At 2:07pm on 28 Aug 2009, TheDeluded wrote:

    Platini thinks it could be sorted out with more refs. What do WE think?
    Doesn't this just mean more opinions to take into account?

    Why not just sort out the 'technology'? Why is it even referred to as 'technology', given that all that's really needed is for the fella in black to wander over to the side and see what everyone at home can immediately see again and again, by re-winding and slow-motion replaying what just happened.

    Hell, it could even be shown on the big screen so that everyone can see what the ref sees. No cause for complaint from either set of fans.

    By the way, being someone who absolutely abhors cheating - which is what diving in football should be called - I've been rather impressed with Jermaine Defoe. All through pre-season and into the start of this season, he's steadfastly refused to go down under challenge, in the box or out, and in the process, has scored more goals than anybody else.

    As a certain squeaky-voiced puppet would say:
    THAT'S THE WAY TO DO IT!

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  • 40. At 2:13pm on 28 Aug 2009, Mombasajumbo wrote:

    Eduardo seems to be getting a lot of coverage but when ronaldo,gerrard and drogba were diving all was ok. the media and all other english cubs were ok with it. Now that it involves an Arsenal player then everyone is screaming about it. Why is it that the English Media does not like Arsenal Fc, Is it because it has a foreign Manager and players well I guess YES. It is high time now the football governing bodies should embrace technology by accepting video replays to enable referees to make correct decision on the pitch. Suppose Eduardos goal was the deciding goal then it would have already costed Celtics a place in the Champions league. if this trend continue teams can sacrifice players to win games. They can ban Eduardo for 2 games but his TEAM has already progressed to the next level. Think WIDE

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  • 41. At 2:19pm on 28 Aug 2009, Goosey55 wrote:

    UEFA's charge is based on Article 10, paragraph 1c of the UEFA disciplinary regulations (misconduct of players) which states: ``Players may be suspended for two competition matches, or for a specified period, for acting with the obvious intent to cause any match official to make an incorrect decision or supporting his error of judgment and thereby causing him to make an incorrect decision.''

    I'm an Arsenal fan and am all for Eduardo being punished. I don't want to see diving. But will UEFA really stick to this plan over the next 9 months of the new season? It says in that quote that any player that supports the ref's error of judgement is guilty. So if Eboue who played the one-two with Eduardo and could see it was a dive should he be banned too? Should Roy Carroll have been banned when he 'saved' Pedro Mendes's shot from the half way line but knew it had crossed the line? He supported the linesman's/ref's decision not to give the goal.

    There is no way justice will be served. They are making a one-off, unfair example of Eduardo and this won't stop diving. Only if they commit to a crackdown can I support this charge.

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  • 42. At 2:20pm on 28 Aug 2009, oldstafford wrote:

    GazUtd, you're getting more criticism than Robbo.
    I'm just waiting now for JDR and JC to come on and berate your postings rather than Robbo's blog.
    In my opinion you can both keep up the good work, reading this sure beats doing my job.

    (And you were ‘outed’ by Ira in the last blog so it's no surprise).

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  • 43. At 2:22pm on 28 Aug 2009, poppyAstonvanilla wrote:

    #23
    I watched the Villa match last night and Ashley Young didn't dive to win those penalties, he was fouled. There was no suggestion in the commentary that he dived, nor did the papers report it as so.
    Perhaps he was just too fast for the defenders? After all, that is why we bought him...

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  • 44. At 2:23pm on 28 Aug 2009, whoareyablog wrote:

    @mombasjumbo

    The English media hate Arsenal because they have a foreign manager and players??

    So what about Chelsea and Liverpool?

    I don't think it's right to say that when Drogba and Ronaldo were diving everything was OK - the press and pundits went on about it for ages, and still haven't stopped. A huge part of both those excellent players' reputations is for diving/simulation, largely because the press make such a big deal of it.

    I really don't think Eduardo is getting especially harsh treatment - it's probably more a sense of disappointment in a player like him who is mostly well-liked.

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  • 45. At 2:26pm on 28 Aug 2009, LaxHodgy wrote:

    When I first the eduardo incident I screamed penalty at my TV!! But after the replays I was disappointed that a player I respected for his courage to come back from an horrific injury had faked contact!! My opinion is that we should have a video referee like in rugby and the ref simply asks him for major decisions in and around the box can I award a free kick or penatly or even goal (Freddy Sears lol) that way if a player has cheated he gets found out and booked (as diving is bookable offence) and the other team doesn't get punished by a free kick/pen. against them! As people keep saying diving is a major problem and setting our kids a bad example how about the lack of respect shown to officials?? We need to sort that out by having officials grow a pair and booking players for dissent first time around instead of after the player abuses them for the 10th time, if the players have a problem they go to captain and the captain sorts it out with the ref! Easy .. and its that way in alot of sports.

    On another note, Robbo i love your blogs they keep me entertained from thecontent to the comments lol

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  • 46. At 2:29pm on 28 Aug 2009, goldstone79 wrote:

    This is all very well, but what I really wanted to know is what JoeDavisRoach's views were.

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  • 47. At 2:30pm on 28 Aug 2009, goldstone79 wrote:

    P.s. I'm pretty sure he's going to like this one...

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  • 48. At 2:33pm on 28 Aug 2009, Goosey55 wrote:

    whoareyoublog: i agree with you about ronaldo and drogba. i think the difference with arsenal is that we don't have a stand-out lampard or gerrard figure so people see us as particularly un-english, even though liverpool regularly fielded only gerrard and carragher last year.

    for someone who hasn't got a history of diving, though, i do think eduardo is being harshly treated. even rooney has dived - he helped united end arsenal's unbeaten run in 2004 with a dive for a penalty. no one cared then. because he's english? perhaps. to be fair he's changed. but who's to say eduardo won't? he's probably played fewer top flight games in england now than rooney had when he dived in 2004. he doesn't deserve a ban.

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  • 49. At 2:33pm on 28 Aug 2009, CaesarWasAnIrishman wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 50. At 2:33pm on 28 Aug 2009, Richyburger wrote:

    To me the funniest part about everything was Wenger's comment of "I'm sure he just did it to get out of the way because he was afraid of being hurt".

    Perhaps someone should explain to Mr Wenger and Eduardo (who should be called a Brazilian not a Croatian, it's like claiming Tony Cascarino is Irish!) that the best way to avoid injury is not to leave your leg trailing in the hope of it being touched and then falling down after you have went past the goalkeeper.

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  • 51. At 2:33pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    #42

    I had forgot about Irn_Bru outing me. Nevertheless it was pleasing to be called it again all the same.

    Apologies it took me more than 10 minutes to reply to you but as a jobless homosexual I had to have breakfast and exfoliate.

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  • 52. At 2:36pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    "it's like claiming Tony Cascarino is Irish!"

    That should be punishable by death (or at least membership of my newly founded fan club) we don't want him, he's nothing to do with us.

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  • 53. At 2:42pm on 28 Aug 2009, CaesarWasAnIrishman wrote:

    Surely membership along with Irn_bru and PaulMcShane would be a punishment worse than death?

    And I'd agree with oldstafford, good work from both you and Robbo (as always). I'm looking forward to the weekly GazUtd blog, possibly on the RTé website???

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  • 54. At 2:44pm on 28 Aug 2009, Andreisgiant wrote:

    Yet another obscene amount of comments from Gary United. Why do you feel the need to reply to EVERY SINGLE POST? You'd swear your comments were insightful and interesting, but theyre not. They're poor attempts at humour that don't stick, rarely get a response and just become very boring and mundane to read.

    Oh I know, people are going to come back at me and say "oh well I like Gary's #41, #42, #43, #44 etc" but I guess when you post as much as he does, one or two will have to be regarded as 'funny'.

    Please, please stop with the relentless barrage of posts.

    You're not funny

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  • 55. At 2:47pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    #53
    You can't get in to the Irn_Bru and PaulMcShane club, I've tried. The doormen were adamant I wasn't the right type to be allowed in.

    No chance of a blog on the RTE (kudos to you for your fada skills) website, you have to pay them these days and as we all know I am a jobless layabout.

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  • 56. At 2:48pm on 28 Aug 2009, Clint wrote:

    The punishment for diving after the game should be based on the player's actions at the time of the incident. So, Eduardo would be given the oppertunity to inform the ref that no contact was made and would therefore not receive a fine or ban for his homesty.

    If, as Eduardo did the other night, he picks the ball up happily and slots away the pen knowing fine well that he's not been touched then he should be given a minimun 4 match ban and fine (fines don't really hurt modern day footballers at all do they).

    If that was the rule then you'd see quite a lot of honesty and people that were being deliberately dishonest would know they would face a decent sized ban for their troubles.

    Still think that the UK is one of the few countries to genuinely frown upon diving. If you watch most Portuguese players, it's like they've been taught to dive as if it were a genuine football skill.

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  • 57. At 2:53pm on 28 Aug 2009, ExPat Smoggie wrote:

    I can't comment on the Eduardo incident as I didn't see it, however I do have a few concerns with the use of technology. Whilst it could give assistance to a ref in his decision making, I don't see how a pause in the game, to allow time to review can be fully incorporated. After all, footy is meant to be a fast flowing game.

    What of the scenario where a "Geoff Hurst" goal is not given, a defender does an "Bolton under Aladice" and hoofs it up the other end for the striker to slot it under the keeper. Under review the "Geoff Hurst" was given. Does the second goal still stand?
    Video review during play only works where the sport being reviewed has logical break points after each action and obvious restart points, such as cricket, American Football (or should that be HandBall?) and the like.

    The only way Video review could work for our beloved game is that the Ref has a "Pause" button to freeze play while he wanders over to his monitor. T.V. might like the idea though, it gives them a chance to slip in a few adverts.

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  • 58. At 2:53pm on 28 Aug 2009, spurs_happy wrote:

    To all the people commenting on the fact that Gaz utd is commenting too much, do you just come here to point him out.

    The comment box is for people who want to make comments, so he is entitled to do so.

    Anyway because this is a blog, I actually might just comment on the BLOG.

    Good blog robbo but you could have just made it shorter by just stating what TheDeluded (#39) said

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  • 59. At 2:54pm on 28 Aug 2009, CaesarWasAnIrishman wrote:

    #55

    Don't think I'd want to get in to be honest. Reckon you'd have to endure some sort of inquisition into what you say, much like Robbo does on here every week.

    Cheers for the kudos, have to get the cúpla focail in somewhere...

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  • 60. At 2:55pm on 28 Aug 2009, gringo Loco wrote:

    designated diver luv it

    The USA pro sports could have a designated doper

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  • 61. At 2:56pm on 28 Aug 2009, Chilli-Dog wrote:

    It's not just diving that's cheating. Any player who deliberately fouls another player is cheating too. If a someone commits a deliberate foul in the penalty area and gets away with it then they're cheating just as much as someone who dives and wins a penalty. Why not criticise the foulers just as much as the divers?

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  • 62. At 3:00pm on 28 Aug 2009, gringo Loco wrote:

    and while we're on how about faining injury.

    They should have a toe amputated each time rather like the Saudis used to amputate a hand for theaving. That would stop it.

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  • 63. At 3:03pm on 28 Aug 2009, Spitfire wrote:

    Re #57.

    Football indeed is a fast game that is brought to a halt any way by someone lying flat or squirming around in apparent agony. At this point, the fourth official could rewind and assist the ref in making a fair judgment. Then there is the usual hoo haa by either team followed by any such instance resulting in even more lost time.

    If its serious enough to stop a game, it should be serious enough to send either the foul player or the cheater sent off.

    More Refs as Platini wants would only mean more mistakes.

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  • 64. At 3:03pm on 28 Aug 2009, LaxHodgy wrote:

    #57 You do have a point although I think the ref could only consult the video ref when he blows the whistle (otherwise a match would end up being 3hrs long!) for what he thinks is a foul and if its in a major area or time consult the video ref make sure you do get that big decision right. I believe that having 5 officials on the pitch is abit much there could be a case of too many cooks spoil the broff!

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  • 65. At 3:04pm on 28 Aug 2009, katborg wrote:

    Have to say that the reaction to Eduardo is so ott, UEFA have really set a precedent now, everytime I see a player dive in euro competition I expect a similar response, Gerrard, Ronaldo, Owen etc etc. all need to be careful.

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  • 66. At 3:06pm on 28 Aug 2009, CaesarWasAnIrishman wrote:

    56. At 2:48pm on 28 Aug 2009, InterestingClint wrote:
    The punishment for diving after the game should be based on the player's actions at the time of the incident. So, Eduardo would be given the oppertunity to inform the ref that no contact was made and would therefore not receive a fine or ban for his homesty.

    -----------------------

    Agree with this solution above any of the others. It's possible that players ready themselves for impact in the penalty area in similar situations to Eduardo/Boruc, but at least if the player in question has the opportunity to admit a mistake on his part, I reckon you'd see a decrease in the amount of bad decisions made because of diving. Didn't Robbie Fowler appeal to a ref after he gave an incorrect decision a few years back?

    Not sure if the ref's would go for it though, might undermine their authority on the pitch........

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  • 67. At 3:10pm on 28 Aug 2009, ExPat Smoggie wrote:

    What about introducing a system similar to Tennis where each manager has 3 challenges to decisions (plus an extra one if it goes to extra-time). If his challenge is "proved" he isn't charged one of his three. Etc.

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  • 68. At 3:10pm on 28 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    A panel of 5 neutral judges (recruited from Robbo blogs) behind each goal could raise scorecards after each dive. The first set of marks would be for technique and the second set for artistry. Anybody averaging better than a 5.1 would be booked, 7.0 and up sent off, over 9.0 would be a two game suspension and a perfect 10.0 would result in a lifetime ban from footie but an automatic place on their Nation's Olympic diving team.

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  • 69. At 3:13pm on 28 Aug 2009, 6charname wrote:

    At 2:00pm on 28 Aug 2009, chuchugaga wrote:

    I don't get the Boruc joke. Anyone?

    ---
    Me neither. Is this anything to do with me not mispronouncing the name like I assume the Brits do, or with some reference to a local phrase from the North East that I've never heard of?

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  • 70. At 3:15pm on 28 Aug 2009, Cesc_Torres_vs_CR7 wrote:

    "even one who can appreciate how lucky he is to still be playing the beautiful game".

    It is sad that you think Eduardo is lucky after what he has been through caused by worse cheats who only stop arsenal through violent treatment. I think if Eduardo cheated, it is not important whether he got a penalty or free kick outside the area, he should be punished.

    I also expect that all divers where there is video evidence be punished whether they dove an hour ago or 6 years ago. In athletics you are even stripped of your medals and earnings. CR7 and Man-U have been the biggest beneficiaries of diving in the last 5 years.

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  • 71. At 3:17pm on 28 Aug 2009, cludoking wrote:

    How about actually subjecting the divers to the pain they simulate. If a player dives like they've been felled by a large rock falling down a hill, then that should be their fate; Gone down like they're shot from the stand - get shot from the stand, throwing themselves through the air like they've p*$$"d off a one ton gorilla – pi$$ of a one ton gorilla and put them in a cage with the player (the player wearing a sign that says "I woz the one that p*$$"d you off")

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  • 72. At 3:17pm on 28 Aug 2009, WhitleyBayWonTheVase wrote:

    Michael Twitini is a hypocrit.

    He has openly admitted that he would have dived wherever possible when playing german opposition to get revenge for THAT Schumacher tackle against his team.

    He said the opportunity to dive never arose after the tackle but that he would not have hesitated to do so had it. Yet now he wants to put two assistant referees on the pitch, one behind each goal mouth, to disuade players from doing something he condoned.

    Whilst the act needs to go from the game, Mr Twitini needs to go long before it. For a definition of double standards, look no further than UEFA and the scruffy french bloke on a mission to destroy football (until such a point in time as a French club does remotely well in the Champions League, when he'll then decide hes got the perfect blend of rules and all is well).

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  • 73. At 3:19pm on 28 Aug 2009, Adie wrote:

    I think it's outrageous to retrospectively punish a player for diving. This kind of thing goes on week in, week out. I have no doubt that there were countless other dives in different games on the same night. I think Eduardo has been unlucky to be singled out. Haven't UEFA got anything better to do?! Platini is a a clown.

    I watched both legs of the tie and Celtic were out of sight, beaten by a much, much better team. So it's not like the game hinged on this one incident.

    I find the whole debate impossibly boring to be honest. How long has diving been a bone of contention? AGES, and it will continue to be. Unfortunately it is part of the game.

    One thing I would say is that the sooner we have goal line referee's assistants or whatever, the better. Then at least this type of thing can be spotted and the right decision made

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  • 74. At 3:20pm on 28 Aug 2009, WhitleyBayWonTheVase wrote:

    p.s. the worst dive in England was from a Sheffield Wednesday player, Graham Hyde, back in the 90's.

    His effort makes Eduardo look like a rank amateur (not to mention Mark Hughes feigning a head butt against Montpellier in the same decade).

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  • 75. At 3:23pm on 28 Aug 2009, Steve Tudor wrote:

    As an Arsenal fan, I think Eduardo should be banned. Sometimes players do go down cos they are moving fast and it's easy to lose balance, but he was clearly dragging his leg looking for contact and didn't get it. Ban him, it's obvious.

    However, none of the non-Arsenal fans have decently answered the question of why this is being treated as such a big deal when so many other players dive regularly. I'm not saying Eduardo shouldn't be punished, I think he should. but there shoudl be consistancy.

    And the excuse making in #27 for Didier built-like-a-brick****house-but-goes-down-easier-than-the-house-of-straw Drogba was hilarious!

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  • 76. At 3:24pm on 28 Aug 2009, LaxHodgy wrote:

    Re #74

    Gamst Pederson last year when he clipped his own heels and went down when no-one was near him and then he had the arrogance to complain about not being given the decision is the worst dive I have ever seen it was that bad it made me laugh ... still does every time i see it lol

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  • 77. At 3:28pm on 28 Aug 2009, Steve Tudor wrote:

    #73 I found Platini's honest quite refreshing! If he had played the righteous indignation roel and then someone pointed out an example of him diving he would have looked a right wally. He possibly laboured his point a bit, but there is nothing wrong with admitting that none of us are perfect!
    Also it showed that diving is nothing new. It might be a bit more common, but I think largely it's just more obvious as we have cameras on every angle and much clearer images.

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  • 78. At 3:28pm on 28 Aug 2009, mybloodwasinjectedintomefromacanon wrote:

    commiting a foul to stop a person running with the ball and doesn't tell the ref / cheating

    ball crossing byline, player brings it back in and doesn't tell the ref it crossed the line, crosses the ball and team mate scores / cheating

    Player gets sent off for a mistake from ref, opposition say well done ref you made the correct decision / cheating by opposition players as they agreed with the ref

    Article 10 paragraph 1c
    Players may be suspended for two competition matches, or for a specified period, for acting with the obvious intent to cause any match official to make an incorrect decision or supporting his error of judgment and thereby causing him to make an incorrect decision.

    So obviously the above offences should be a 2 match ban as they fall into the description layed out in UEFA's rules and regulations



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  • 79. At 3:28pm on 28 Aug 2009, Clint wrote:

    #66:

    I don't think the refs would feel undermined as they would still be making the decision at the time. It was obviously difficult to see that Eduardo had dived at the time as it all happens so quickly and most refs would probably have given a pen the other night.

    But on veiwing the incident after I'm sure the ref would concede that it was a dive. It's not that he's made a shocking decision, he's simply acted on what he saw at the time and everyone is human. No referee is capable of picking up on every single bit of play-acting.

    I reckon some referees would welcome an honesty-based disciplinary procedure as you would get your Robbie Fowlers occasionally doing the decent thing and admitting they haven't made contact.

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  • 80. At 3:31pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    I have often wondered why the authourities do nothing about cheating. Well practically nothing.

    I understand that one association won't bring in rules by themselves, if the FA started banning everyone for cheating tomorrow all the little prima donnas would be off to Spain on Sunday.

    But why don't FIFA, or at least UEFA do it? For all our joking its not that difficult. Immediate 5 match for the likes of Eduardo the other night would soon put an end to it. So why isn't it done? I can't even figure out how it makes more money for them not to do it.

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  • 81. At 3:33pm on 28 Aug 2009, WhitleyBayWonTheVase wrote:

    I find the decision to make an example of Eduardo, and I don't see how anyone can say this isn't doiong that, to be a rather odd one.

    The lad isn't doing anything we don't see in the Champions League all the time.

    However, I do find Arsene Wengers explanation of this somewhat puzzling. I take his point that the treatment of Eduardo is harsh - because I think it is (as a non-Arsenal fan too). But, to say Eduardo perhaps dived because of his broken leg incident...hmm, you're stretching the boundary again Arsene!

    Its a shame that such an emphatic win is being blighted by this though. Celtic looked like Whitley Bay FC at times - and that is being hard on my beloved club (who, incidentally, beat Bishop Auckland 7-0 on Tuesday evening and we are now undefeated with 4 wins out of 4 and haven't even conceded a goal yet! Let me have my moment.)

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  • 82. At 3:35pm on 28 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    #81 How's the diving in Whitley Bay?

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  • 83. At 3:36pm on 28 Aug 2009, Adie wrote:

    re #77

    Yes I agree largely with what you're saying. The problem clearly needs to be tackled and Platini does seem to take the "bull by the horns", but he only ever seems to come out of the woodwork to have a pop at the English premier league and their clubs.

    I agree with Wenger, I think Arsenal and Eduardo can consider themselves hard done by.

    I'm not a gunner by the way! Leeds fan...

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  • 84. At 3:39pm on 28 Aug 2009, Steve Tudor wrote:

    Arsene is just protecting his player, the way all managers do. Ever see a manager after a match do anythign other than defend his player over something like this? I certainly haven't.

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  • 85. At 3:40pm on 28 Aug 2009, collie21 wrote:

    Gaz he was 'your' greatest forward for a long time no matter where he came from.

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  • 86. At 3:40pm on 28 Aug 2009, Daniel Thornton wrote:

    The only reason why this Eduardo incident is being slapped all over the papers is 1: because the ITV pannel consisting of 1 ex celtic and 2 ex ROI who have a major soft spot for Celtic made a huge deal of it 2: UEFA cant stand English clubs doing well in the CL so do anything to try hamper their progress and 3: Its the newspapers attempts at covering up what happened at Upton Park in hope that the 2018 World Cup bid doesnt suffer too much...

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  • 87. At 3:48pm on 28 Aug 2009, Adie wrote:

    Of course he's going to defend his player.

    I think the debate should be around the validity of the penalty decision itself rather than the conduct of the player. Like I said, I think RETROSPECTIVE punishment for "simulation" is wrong. It's ridiculous. UEFA have shown in the past a reluctance to show any common sense whatsover and this is contiuning. They are pursuing this even though the in the grand scheme of things the decision didn't affect the outcome of the tie.
    When Darren Fletcher, for instance, got booked last season in the semis and missed the final? That was the WRONG decision and UEFA wouldn't use any common sense to rescind the yellow card.

    The effort should be put in getting the decision right in the first place and this could be acheived by having an extra pair of eyes on the goal line.

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  • 88. At 3:48pm on 28 Aug 2009, Cesc_Torres_vs_CR7 wrote:

    I think any activity or mistake from an official that has a direct bearing on the match result should result in a longer ban and larger fine for the player or ref involved. If it has no bearing on the result the player or official should still be punished.

    The victim (team) should be the recipient of the fine cash along with financial compensation determined by TV earnings etc.

    It should also not matter how long ago the act was committed so we should see the FA, UEFA and FIFA taking action on all past "crimes" now that the debate is so high on the everyone's agenda.

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  • 89. At 3:50pm on 28 Aug 2009, The Adventures Of Giuseppe Rossi wrote:

    I think you chose the wrong photo for Ronaldo as Cattermole is the one tackling him, so most likely Ronaldo has probably just been assaulted.

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  • 90. At 3:51pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    #88

    That would mean that Liverpool would have won the league for the last 20 years then wouldn't it?

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  • 91. At 3:52pm on 28 Aug 2009, Theo Logical wrote:

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    But the fact is that Eduardo's headlong theatrical plummet was symptomatic of a great malaise in our game.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    True. As an Arsenal fan, I hate to see one of my players dive. Eduardo should be punished by all means. But I hope ALL divers from this point on are punished. Let us apply the rules consistently and fairly, even if the player in question happens to be a "marquee name" like Ronaldo, Gerrard or Terry.

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  • 92. At 3:55pm on 28 Aug 2009, dungavel wrote:

    There is no need for video evidence. I think the best way to do this is through retrospective punishment. The reason being is i think the reaction of the player is the thing that should be punished. Now, Eduardo new he wasn't brought down, but he had the chance to rectify the situation by informing the referee that it wasn't a foul or simply miss the kick.

    If a player hasn't dived then he has nothing to fear from gaining an advantage from the situation. If on the other hand he has dived and taken advantage, by either taking the penalty, the free kick or allowing a member of his team to do so, then he should be banned when the incident is reviewed.

    I think this way would encourage more honesty from players. If a team amounts a too many instances of diving then points should be deducted from the league the play in. In terms of international football excessive offenses should result in the team dropping down the co-efficient table or lose points in qualifying.

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  • 93. At 3:56pm on 28 Aug 2009, fallybee wrote:

    Robbo,I live in Germany and as you know, the locals dont really enjoy humour so it is always a pleasure to read your blog. The Germans do however know about "Diving" because all German teams, be it Male, Female, old or young learn how to Dive at an early stage in their careers. The Germans have also won two world cups through the use of the dive, 1974 & 1990 ! I would ban the "Divers" for two years and make them pay their wages or whatever they earned to Charity during that period.
    Robbo, Keep up the anti-dive work and perhaps you should name a Monthly
    Diver as "Girls Blouse of the Month" any suggestion for the first winner ?


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  • 94. At 4:00pm on 28 Aug 2009, haohaohao wrote:

    You are blogging me crazy, mate!

    Certainly I don't regard dive, especially it is not worth it when you play the likes of Celtic. But, was there such uproar when his leg was broken? Any comments about Celtic players kicking their opponents, instead of football?

    How do we punish those abusing media? Where is justice these days?



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  • 95. At 4:03pm on 28 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 96. At 4:07pm on 28 Aug 2009, Pokerlovintaxadviser wrote:

    I feel a little sorry for Eduardo getting charged by UEFA over his first offence while Ronaldo, Drogba, etc haven't been banned once for all their antics over the years. Even as a Spurs fan, I'd frankly rather see Celtic charged for bringing the sport into disrepute for their boring play. They make a Sam Allardyce side look like the Brazilians of the 1970s.

    The way to get rid of simulation is with harsher penalties, e.g. automatic red card - rather than a yellow card which basically says you can dive for free once a game - or retrospective bans of several games but for everyone in every league in the world who does it. Or, following rugby's bloodgate, suspending the culprits from the sport for 3 years. That would make them think twice before tumbling like a slinky.

    More referees will make no difference - after all 2 officials couldn't see Freddie Sears score a goal so how are 3 going to agree on a dive? What a waste of time and money when television evidence can be used at the time or afterwards quickly and cheaply.

    As poster #72 rightly notes nothing will be done though as the powers that be at FIFA and UEFA are a bunch of divers from countries who love little more than plentiful ballet so to expect them to impose bans on everyone who dives week-in, week-out is like expecting Gordon Brown to create a sex-tape.

    And to those that are suggesting English players dive too, well yes that is correct but they didn't used to. It is only since players from countries where diving, time-wasting and rolling around like Norman Wisdom are part of the culture were allowed to come to the English game that simulation has become a part of the game amongst the English players as well.

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  • 97. At 4:08pm on 28 Aug 2009, zainezero wrote:

    For those of you struggling with the Boruc joke, pronounce it bow locks. I think that should be enough to get the point. if not think of it as a reference to genatalia.

    I have to admit i enjoy reading the robbo blogs as they can be quite humorous. but i'm getting more and more annoyed by the people who come on just to slate it. if you read it and dont like it, fair enough. there is no need to come back time and time again to post saying how worthless it was reading it.

    as for diving i dont think an extra official behidn the goals would aid this, in fact it would probably make things more complicated. another possibility of human error introduced to the game. what if they flag for something and the ref doesn't agree? how will they have a clear view of the box through all the defenders, strikers and keeper at a corner/free kick or even just a view past the keeper in open play? they will suffer from restricted vision, more so than usual!

    i'd be interested to see what happened to that proposal to use laser technology for the goals. sort of a grid behind the keeper set to register when a ball, or certain percentage of the ball crossed it. they could have a hockey style light behind the goal or make the ref's ear piece vibrate when there is a goal. no more worries about goals that shouldnt have been or goals that were never given!

    keep writing robbo. for those of us who can appreciate what you are doing.

    cue backlash of comments.

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  • 98. At 4:11pm on 28 Aug 2009, CurlyFriesFan wrote:

    #94 haohaohao

    - the reaction when Eduardo's leg was severed by a player going in with a straight leg over the ball to hurt him was an outpouring of sympathy for Martin Taylor

    Just about tells you everything you need to know about England's views on football and Arsenal in particular

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  • 99. At 4:11pm on 28 Aug 2009, Oxfordfox wrote:

    Cricketers are fined a portion of their match fee if they break rules. Just a thought...

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  • 100. At 4:14pm on 28 Aug 2009, Steve Tudor wrote:

    I was at St Andrews, but with the Birmingham fans (being as quiet as i could) when Eduardo's leg was broken. the guy next to me didn't even think it was a foul!

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  • 101. At 4:16pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:



    Trotter what did you say??

    Can I just say I didn't complain about anything that was directed against me earlier, I'm perfectly happy to have them still there!

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  • 102. At 4:17pm on 28 Aug 2009, Paris-Amsterdam Yank wrote:

    We have some experience in North America of this kind of situation:

    "57. At 2:53pm on 28 Aug 2009, ExpatSmoggie wrote:
    ...

    "What of the scenario where a 'Geoff Hurst' goal is not given, a defender does an "Bolton under Aladice" and hoofs it up the other end for the striker to slot it under the keeper. Under review the 'Geoff Hurst' was given. Does the second goal still stand?
    Video review during play only works where the sport being reviewed has logical break points after each action and obvious restart points, such as cricket, American Football (or should that be HandBall?) and the like. "

    In continuous-action games like football and ice hockey, the use of video review is quite tricky because of the problem you identify: the game goes on after the incident, so if the initial decision is eventually reversed, you have to figure out what to do with all of the play that's gone on afterwards.

    This is one reason why the most well-developed system I know of for video review is in American football, where each play is discrete and lasts for only a few seconds.

    To answer your example, the professional ice hockey league in North America, which has far and away the best standard of ice hockey in the world because its salaries are so much higher than anywhere else (and therefore all the best Russian, Swedish, Czech, etc. players go there), uses video review to determine if a goal has been scored. If the referee thinks the puck hit the crossbar, play will go on, perhaps for several minutes, until there is a natural stoppage in play, at which point the ref goes and looks at the video. When he sees that the puck actually crossed the line, hit the interior frame of the goal, and came back out (a la Crystal Palace), he awards the goal, the game clock is set back to the time when the goal was scored, and everything that happened after that is wiped out.

    So, if the other team scored a perfectly legitimate goal a minute or so later, that goal is taken off the scoreboard. It's quite harsh, though one can see the logic of the rule, and it has happened.

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  • 103. At 4:21pm on 28 Aug 2009, ChuckleBrother2 wrote:

    At 4:00pm on 28 Aug 2009, haohaohao wrote:

    You are blogging me crazy, mate!

    Certainly I don't regard dive, especially it is not worth it when you play the likes of Celtic. But, was there such uproar when his leg was broken? Any comments about Celtic players kicking their opponents, instead of football?

    How do we punish those abusing media? Where is justice these days?

    ---------------------------------------------

    This is the fundamental problem with Robbo Robson blogs. Fair enough it's supposedly just some guy's opinion but it's representative of the lowest common denominator out there. And your average under-educated lager-swilling football fan doesn't talk about how horrible it is that the skillful players who make football worth watching gets hacked down by some utterly forgettable joe nobody every other week and every once in a while ends up getting seriously injured. Similarly while you get 80% of the blog on Eduardo diving, a far smaller amount is dedicated to talking about the violence at the West Ham Millwall game this week, by any sane standards a far more serious issue for this. Not that any actual insights are offered on either topic, just a bunch of horrendously unfunny "proposals". I don't really blame Niall for this though, it's clearly what he's getting paid to write in this persona.


    The following are disclaimers aimed at avoiding me having to respond to utterly retarded comments:
    1) I am not saying "Robbo" should spend his time writing about climate change or the state of the economy. However this is a blog about sport in general and football in particular and the most important issues SHOULD be addressed more often and in more detail.
    2) I am not excusing diving. It is obviously foul play. If you think I am trying to say diving is acceptable you are objectively wrong.

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  • 104. At 4:22pm on 28 Aug 2009, zainezero wrote:

    that could be quite difficult in terms of referreing decisions as ice hockey has a sin bin. what would happen if a ref in the time between intervals has sent a player off? to reverse the time would prevent this player from being punished for their infraction, something which may have possibly caused an opposing player to go off injured! the net result would be, you get the goal and lose a player to injury and the other team get away without being red carded. doesn't seem fair some how and if one team knows the ref is going to go to rule in their favour after watrching video it could result in a lot of cheating in the "time that would be lost"

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  • 105. At 4:24pm on 28 Aug 2009, Steve Tudor wrote:

    1) I am not saying "Robbo" should spend his time writing about climate change or the state of the economy. However this is a blog about sport in general and football in particular and the most important issues SHOULD be addressed more often and in more detail.

    They are. In other blogs. But that's not the point of Robbo's, as you yourself state. It's a bit like me turning on cbeebies and moaning about the lack of coverage of NHS reforms

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  • 106. At 4:25pm on 28 Aug 2009, Paris-Amsterdam Yank wrote:

    "93. At 3:56pm on 28 Aug 2009, luckyrighthalf wrote:
    The Germans have also won two world cups through the use of the dive, 1974 & 1990 ! "

    You live in Germany, I live in Holland. The Dutch are still in agony over 1974, the most traumatic thing to happen to this country since 1945.

    Two classic moments from that day:

    1. When Holland got a (deserved) penalty after running circles around the Germans for the first couple of minutes of the game, Beckbauer went to the referee and said, "You gave that only because you are English and we are German." Totally out of line, but did it help the referee give the rather more dubious penalty later in Germany's favour?

    2. When, after Holland scored that early penalty and then spent the rest of the game showing off their "Total Football" rather than making much of an effort to score a second, only to see Germany snatch two late goals to win it, the Dutch TV commentator responded to Germany's winner by saying, "Oh, no! They've fooled us again!" He later claimed he wasn't referring to the war. But this is as famous in Holland as "They think it's all over" is in England.

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  • 107. At 4:25pm on 28 Aug 2009, Phil wrote:

    "Designated diver"! Love it! Give the inventor a blog on the BBC :)

    I think there could be something in that idea, only I'd make it a label attached to someone convicted of simulation (maybe they have to wear a pink armband or something!) Then, any fouls on a designated diver inside the box, would never be penalties, only indirect free-kicks from outside the box.

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  • 108. At 4:26pm on 28 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    101 Gaz, In light of what wasn't moderated last week I'm surprised the moderator removed it but hopefully he had a chuckle.

    I expressed doubts about you being gay and said that your fondness for MUFC was rivaled by your fondness for another 4 letter word that begins with the same three letters as MUFC and is often connected with the topic of the blog, ie. diving!

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  • 109. At 4:29pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Lololol.

    The wife would say different though! ;)

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  • 110. At 4:33pm on 28 Aug 2009, Paris-Amsterdam Yank wrote:

    When it comes to English football, I'm a neutral, but when it comes to the "big four" I probably have more sympathy for Arsenal than any of the others because of their style of play. And I do think Eduardo is being singled out a bit here; if this kind of diving were punished more regularly, I wouldn't have a problem with it, so if this is the start of a new policy, then fine. If it's a one-time thing, then not so fine.

    But for the Arsenal supporters complaining about how no one said anything when Eduardo got injured, that's a pretty selective memory you've got there. Anyone remember the Croatians who confronted Martin Taylor outside the Birmingham practice facility and seemed intent on injuring him? Anyone remember Wenger's rant after the match (which, to give him credit, he later regretted) or the calls in the media (to say nothing of people sounding off on Internet sites like this) for Taylor to be branded a thug and banned for months/years/life?

    On the scale of things, players suffering career-ending or -threatening injuries is a more serious thing than a dive, and hooliganism resulting in stabbings and people going to hospital is worse than both. But it's a complete non sequitur to say Eduardo shouldn't be criticized for accepting a penalty he knew was bogus because his leg got broken a couple of years earlier.

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  • 111. At 4:37pm on 28 Aug 2009, DenistheGenius wrote:

    first of all, when did the "country" of Scotland decide they were no longer happy to be completely irrelevant? this is all just phase 2 of "let's remind the world we still exist" campaign... let's not revisit phase 1

    i'm not pleased with the penalty call, or with Eduardo's apparent dive. but i am pleased that Gerrard is going to be charged with his numerous past dives, and Babel for his cheating against Arsenal in the CL....oh wait, only Eduardo is to be punished?! OK, that seems right and just.

    i'll just go ahead and sound the HYPOCRITE ALERT!!!

    what would happen if Stevie G beat the snot out of another bar patron, and as he stepped over his lifeless body, trailed his back foot and went to ground claiming he was tripped? you geniuses would likely demand the unconscious be charged with GBH and pay damages to poor Stevie.

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  • 112. At 4:37pm on 28 Aug 2009, ChuckleBrother2 wrote:

    At 4:24pm on 28 Aug 2009, steventudor wrote:

    They are. In other blogs. But that's not the point of Robbo's, as you yourself state. It's a bit like me turning on cbeebies and moaning about the lack of coverage of NHS reforms

    -----------------------------------------------------

    No it isn't. It is nothing like that. It is like you turning on the cbeebies and complaining about the low quality of programming on there. The point of robbo's blog, as far as I can tell, seems to be to provide a very straightforward, slightly humourous, analysis of sport. Instead you get a barrage of poorly strung together jokes and absolutely no analysis whatsoever. What's the point of this on a site dedicated to news? I don't see anyone on the world affairs section posting a bunch of cliched racist jokes, or any jokes for that matter. Okay, you get some amusing articles about something fairly light-hearted every once in a while but that is massively different to what "Robbo" is responsible for churning out. Why is it somehow acceptable here?

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  • 113. At 4:38pm on 28 Aug 2009, Cesc_Torres_vs_CR7 wrote:

    The foul on Eduardo was covered up because it was "too violent" to be shown on TV. Now that Eduardo has recovered, the media should highlight it with the aim of clamping down on the likes of Taylor instead of acting like Eduardo is the first guy to dive or has just cost Celtic the Champions League title.

    Also a lot of the people seem to think that diving is a foreign players problem. This might be true but British football authorities are partly to blame because they lack consistency. They are driven by the commentators.

    On the other hand, there is little if any talent in Britain... I think the last British stars who fans could really enjoy watching were the likes of Gazza, Barnes maybe Owen and Beckham ages ago when there was no TV in some countries. Who would be interested in watching a league of purely English, Welsh, Scottish and Irish stars?

    If the EPL did not have the likes of Cantona, Henry, Ronaldo, Torres and co, we might as well be watching the amateur divisions.

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  • 114. At 4:42pm on 28 Aug 2009, sau_gunner wrote:

    I didn't think that i'll ever say that..............but you are a disgrace robbo

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  • 115. At 4:44pm on 28 Aug 2009, Me and Julio down by the school yard! wrote:

    While this is a (relatively) funny blog, it is rather typical of the English press to talk about diving when a far more serious issue has tarnished our sport this week. Why no six point guide to preventing the hooligans from acting in that manner again? Why do we look to moan about diving when what happened at the Boylen ground on Tuesday night is by far a more serious matter? I am no fan of diving, but all of you who are on here criticising Eduardo's actions answer me this. If it was your team in a cup final or England/Scotland/Wales etc in the World Cup final and one of your teams players dived to win a penalty to put you one nil up, would you criticise? Probably not is my guess. Diving is abhorrent, but I can understand it. Hooliganism is also abhorrent, but I just do not understand it.

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  • 116. At 4:51pm on 28 Aug 2009, PaulMcShane wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 117. At 4:55pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    #116

    I thought you were going?

    Nevertheless congratulations on coming up with stupidest comment ever.

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  • 118. At 4:56pm on 28 Aug 2009, yajustdonsavethose wrote:

    love that wenger thinks its disgraceful that eduardo is to be punished. totally agree that he aint the only diver in the country but to suggest that a dive as bad as that doesnt deserve punishment is a disgrace in itself. wonder if wneger would be saying the same if it was the other way round.

    novel idea. wenger says eduardo is banged to rights, no get out clauses, he cheated to geta pen. accept punishment and get on with it. think he would be far more respected than by suggesting there is a witch hunt going on.

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  • 119. At 5:00pm on 28 Aug 2009, PaulMcShane wrote:

    Thank you Gaz for your feedback. I have referenced your comment for my future posts. Unfortunately I do not take advice from unemployed bums such as yourself.

    Don't worry I'll be gone very soon

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  • 120. At 5:09pm on 28 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    (Glad I don't get PMS).

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  • 121. At 5:11pm on 28 Aug 2009, DenistheGenius wrote:

    what - no Scots have i offended?....well, i suppose that proves my point of "irrelevance" ;)

    but what of all you Koppites and Gerrard worshipers? i'm waiting for your lame defense...

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  • 122. At 5:15pm on 28 Aug 2009, SPB wrote:

    Simple to sort out divers. Some player takes an exaggerated tumble rolls round in agony, ref should assume he's injured. In the interests of player's safety, he should be treated for at least 5-10 minutes. If so badly injured, then he must he need the treatment, if he's faking it, he's just put his team down to ten men. They'd soon stop it then!

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  • 123. At 5:19pm on 28 Aug 2009, mybloodwasinjectedintomefromacanon wrote:

    all i can see on this blog is the dive from eddie but no one has mentioned the dive by young, is it because he is english

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  • 124. At 5:25pm on 28 Aug 2009, mybloodwasinjectedintomefromacanon wrote:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fhAGQ-LkD0k

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  • 125. At 5:27pm on 28 Aug 2009, Barnes B 25 wrote:

    One of the best dives I ever saw was Michael Owen, playing for Liverpool against Valencia in Mestalla. Even my wife, who prefers rugby, couldn't work out why he'd fallen over and was protesting.
    We were no more than 20 yards away from him wit no-one blocking our view.
    Certainly not only non british players, just those who think they can get away with it.
    Besides which, you've got the ref, linesman and fourth official, all with different views of the same event.
    And what about all the shirt tugging, subtle pushes etc done by the defence?
    Win some, lose some, why complain?

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  • 126. At 5:44pm on 28 Aug 2009, onlineprada wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 127. At 5:45pm on 28 Aug 2009, onlineprada wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 128. At 5:59pm on 28 Aug 2009, Rita Cocking wrote:

    You say the Platini is "taking the bull by the horns".I was under the impression that he was behaving more like a bull in a china shop!

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  • 129. At 6:56pm on 28 Aug 2009, Clint wrote:

    #122;

    I agree totally. If a stretcher has to be brought on then a 10 minute "time out" should be incurred. That would stop a lot of injury feining.

    I'd like to also credit James Beattie the other week when he got injured. He managed to leave the feild on his own accord, presumably to allow the game to flow and he was genuinely injured aswell. When you get muppets rolling around faking to be injured in order to break the game up it really tarnishes the game as a whole.

    Players that just try to get on with it should be applauded and more should be done to highlight the idiocy of players who ham it up every time they are tackled.

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  • 130. At 7:01pm on 28 Aug 2009, 16thMay1998 wrote:

    #111, Dennistheeedjit. Assume you're English - it's the lack of education that gives it away.
    Anyway, it ever crossed your mind that you also live in a "country" (inverted commas copyright of Dennistheeedjit 2009)? If not, I'm really sorry to have to do this to you, but go type in "UN Security Council" into Wikipedia...let's have a look...France, check...Russia, check...United States, check. Oh my God, no England. How about NATO? Greece, yep, Spain, fine, Iceland, OK, Albania, got it. Hmm, curious. Still no England. European Union, then? Surely! Let's see...Latvia, Luxembourg, Malta. Crivvens, England still missing. You know what, mate? Hate to be the one to break it to you, but...your green and pleasant land, it's not real, it's just not real...

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  • 131. At 7:02pm on 28 Aug 2009, Addisons_a_monster wrote:

    All footballers are wimps these days, can you imagine how many timed didier or the gelled one would roll if hit by these... YELLOW cards!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dgzd7oHyeBY

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  • 132. At 7:04pm on 28 Aug 2009, FirstStarschild wrote:

    Honestly, point 3 was very naiive and sentimental. Of course, it is easy to understand why it was there...

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  • 133. At 7:19pm on 28 Aug 2009, Clint wrote:

    ~121 - DennisTheSpoiltarsenalFan


    Who posts a mildly xenophobic comment on a a blog about diving and then half an hour later asks why no one is rising to their rather petty and ill-informed dig??

    It's poor chat.

    The SFA got involved because it would look like sour grapes if Celtic kicked up a fuss about it. The SFA will do anything to detract the media attention away from the national team's unfortunate current predicament.

    And yes, it would still have had absolutely no bearing on the outcome of the tie if the penalty wasn't awarded and your all-conquering nation would still have it's four darlings in the group stages of the champion's league. I hope Arsenal go far because they have the right idea about how football should be played.

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  • 134. At 7:22pm on 28 Aug 2009, richieboy2009 wrote:

    good blog.

    to be honest ronaldo and ashley young moves so quick tht if touched off they go down but den an artical in the paper i have read before says ronaldo goes down to protect himself from being "taken out off it"

    aswell if eduardo gets banned for this it lets the people up high out rule the ref and they get the final say the ref did not see the incident as much as i hate people for diving and it ruins the beautiful game it should be left unless the ref takes it further. also if there going to use technology bring it in and stop talking about it.

    bring on the next blog

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  • 135. At 7:22pm on 28 Aug 2009, MikeFay wrote:

    What gets done about divers? Here's what should be done - they get a reputation as divers. This makes referees less likely to give them a penalty when they go to ground. Defenders then get to kick lumps out of them and get away with it.

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  • 136. At 7:27pm on 28 Aug 2009, Tony wrote:

    "I would love to know how journalists are appointed by the BBC after reading this drivel.

    Same old tired cliche's rattled out

    JOG ON Robbo"



    Nobody is forcing you to read it ...

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  • 137. At 7:31pm on 28 Aug 2009, Tony wrote:

    Eddy dives once (wrong to do so I agree) ... witchunt
    Gerrard, Drogba, Ronaldo dive every week ... the silence is deafening


    If you are going to punish Eddy fine but if you don't then punish any of the others listed when they do so this season, I hope Arsenal sue the arse of the Fa for unfair treatment!

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  • 138. At 7:58pm on 28 Aug 2009, Bendtner's finishing touch wrote:

    I'd love to see UEFA crackdown on Ronaldo diving. Fat chance that will happen now that he is no longer in the EPL and plays for one of the leagues Platini jerks off to.

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  • 139. At 8:07pm on 28 Aug 2009, mybloodwasinjectedintomefromacanon wrote:

    UEFA have quoted in the past that they cannot use video evidence which contravenes the decision of a match official, yet here we are with the powers that be doing exactly the opposite, so as far as their law goes they cannot and should not do anything to eduardo, if they do then anything that happens in a game of football will have to be jusified by UEFA on video evidence.

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  • 140. At 8:12pm on 28 Aug 2009, mybloodwasinjectedintomefromacanon wrote:

    ie: if a player player scores a goal that is off side this will have to be rescinded by UEFA, but this will not help as the game cannot be replayed, so as far as i am concerened their law (Article 10 praragraph 1c) is inadmissible as a law.

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  • 141. At 8:20pm on 28 Aug 2009, NEARPOSTHEADER wrote:

    Retrospective punishments seem to be used when it suits the relevant footballing authority - the FA cannot rescind a yellow card but they can ban players for agressive action using video evidence. Similarly, UEFA couldn't wipe out the ludicrous red card shown to Fletcher last season...etc.
    Let's have some consistency - players want that from referees, so surely the authorities can show it, too.
    Maybe a new rule could be introduced that allows a ref to award an indirect free kick in the box instead of a penalty - if he doesn't see the offence as leading to a possible goal (most trailing-leg-fall-over-the-goalie penalties WOULD NOT result in goals as the ball is generally heading out anyway). The fact is that a lot of penalties are awarded for offences that have not bearing on a goal being scored - a silly handball for instance - why should a penalty be awarded? Seems the punishment doesn't fit the crime, which is pretty much the rule in football.

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  • 142. At 8:26pm on 28 Aug 2009, Cesc_Torres_vs_CR7 wrote:

    Eduardo is not a diver. Yes he may have dived or fallen. If he is convicted he should be banned. The thing is, if somebody dived 6 years ago or an hour ago and there is evidence, they should be banned if Eduardo is banned. This will ensure diving is minimized. If not, Liverpool and Man United players will continue diving because they expect only Arsenal and Chelsea will get punished.

    The media seems to think that a bunch of British lads playing for an American owned club are more British than a British owned club with a bunch of mostly french, Spanish, African and Brazilian kids. They will shout murder when Drogba swears at the ref but when Gerrard butters a poor DJ they only report the support he gets from his club. When Rooney throws one of his monthly tantrums and gets sent off, he is a frustrated genius and the decision is "harsh". You cannot get a better ambassador for football than Eduardo. It is his first dive as far as I know, if it was a dive. How many strikers have such a record?

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  • 143. At 8:29pm on 28 Aug 2009, DenistheGenius wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 144. At 9:04pm on 28 Aug 2009, Cesc_Torres_vs_CR7 wrote:

    Just like violent conduct is reviewed using video, trying to deceive the ref by cheating to get a goal or a set piece should be punished. Trying to get somebody punished when they are innocent is also cheating. Shirt pulling to prevent a goal is also cheating and can affect results.

    It should be possible to punish anyone as long as there is conclusive video evidence whether it is during or after the game. On the other hand, we can have a system where as long as the ref did not see, you can even carry a shotgun and shoot your opponents kneecaps without any action from even the police.

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  • 145. At 9:07pm on 28 Aug 2009, icecreammn wrote:

    I felt bad for Eduardo last season after his injury, and as much as I dislike Arsenal, I was happy to see him return to fitness and play so well for his team.
    Seeing this absurdity of a dive makes me lose any sympathy I once had. I hope karma comes around and teaches him a lesson.

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  • 146. At 9:30pm on 28 Aug 2009, IAWT wrote:

    Im an Arsenal fan and regularly read Robbos blogs. I've never posted on one before, but I've always appreciated it more than Mihir the bozo or Phil McNobody and their garbage.

    And no I don't have a problem with this blog either. In fact, and I may be wrong here, but I suspect there may be some tongue in cheek humour on the part of Robbo especially when you read his remedies to diving. I think its very much in tune with the hysterical mood of the media in general.

    And I keep going back to this example, and the Utd fans might want to look away now, but the most despicable act of diving I ever witnessed was the one which Rooney got away with at Old Trafford in 2004 which won the penalty which RVN converted to set Utd on their way to the decisive victory which ended our 49 game unbeaten run. Yes some people say I can't let it go, and to be fair I have used the example time and time again. But its the disgusting way the episode was completely glossed over by the media, and the justification was always that the score finished 2-0 and not 1-0. Likewise then given the events at the Emirates ended 5-1 on aggregate, I really have been infuriated by the continual hypocrisy which has been allowed to fester unchecked these last few days.

    Rooney doing the same this week wouldnt have been mentioned, because hes Englands golden boy. And for the same reason there has been no mention of Ashley Youngs theatrics last night. So this really does suggest there is a hidden agenda.

    And the only reason I can think as a source of motive for this wicked and spiteful campaign is the fact that he is Croatian and England play Croatia very soon.

    Consistency I have no problem with. And if we are going to start banning divers lets start going retrospectively, and begin by banning Ronaldo for life and stripping Man Utd of the trophies they have won thanks to his cheating. Theres even been talk of deducting us European points. Fine. But lets not make August 26th as some kind of start point because its convenient. Lets go back to October 2004, lets ban Rooney, lets strip Man Utd of every single honour they have accumulated since 2004 and lets ban the likes of Ronaldo, Gerrard and Owen for life for what they have already done since 2004.

    Then when we have done all that, we can start picking on Eddie who has dived for the first time in his career. If its in fairness I have no problem with Eddie serving a two match ban.

    BUT ONLY AFTER WE ADDRESS WHAT HAS BEEN ALLOWED TO PASS SINCE 2004 FIRST!

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  • 147. At 9:33pm on 28 Aug 2009, IAWT wrote:

    And people have been allowed to post on here and on 606 that they hope Eduardo has his legs broken, and I find that deplorable. If anybody suggested the same for any of Englands golden boys then the posts would immediately be withdrawn, so I think the powers that be might want to have a look at some of the vicious contributions being made. Some of them border on the criminal.

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  • 148. At 9:47pm on 28 Aug 2009, Lucky_C wrote:

    How to combat diving?

    A combination of video-refs and snipers on the stadium roof.

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  • 149. At 10:20pm on 28 Aug 2009, Were Ngoging to Ibiza wrote:

    I hope UEFA crack down on all divers, not just the odd one in a token semblance of justice. I also hope that PaulMcShane does as he promised and stops posting. Having spare time does not equate to joblessness. And neither does joblessness equate to being inferior, i'm an engineering student and find this blog a welcome escape from long hours in the library. So hopefully PaulMcShane and the divers can both leave the sport and this blog well alone. Nice one robbo, apparently for some familiarity breeds contempt.

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  • 150. At 10:22pm on 28 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    The big clubs have hired specialist diving coaches to help emphasise the necessity for good take off, form and landing technique to best influence the ref. Here's one of CR at a recent training session.

    http://rookery2.viary.com/storagev12/944000/944065_db8c_625x1000.jpg

    #148, you might be on to something there. Your suggestion might also help with the hooligan problem.

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  • 151. At 10:36pm on 28 Aug 2009, wedontknowfootball wrote:

    i personally think its lovely those celtic tops.

    http://wedontknowfootball.com/

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  • 152. At 10:40pm on 28 Aug 2009, 11_Men_plus_the_Ref wrote:

    2. At 1:10pm on 28 Aug 2009, superNightshift82 wrote:

    I would love to know how journalists are appointed by the BBC after reading this drivel.
    ........................

    If you want Robbo's job, say so. But I doubt if you could do it half as well. Sigh. There must be someone who finds you funny, anayway.

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  • 153. At 10:40pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Trotter, I thought I was bad at Photoshop!

    When are you beating the Pool, is it tomorrow?

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  • 154. At 10:45pm on 28 Aug 2009, 11_Men_plus_the_Ref wrote:

    I just saw the DD on CNN! He wants to win La Liga. Ha hah!

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  • 155. At 10:52pm on 28 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    Gaz, you lot are supposed to be in bed! I didn't photoshop that, I've never photoshopped anything!

    Yep, a date with destiny tomorrow, if it stops raining here I'll be golfing but my best man is a scouser from Oxford and he'll be responsible for text updates. I'll know we're winning if the phone is silent, otherwise I'll get abuse for a week or more. I have ManU in our betting ring so the Arsenal game is a big un! Unfortunately I also have Wolves.

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  • 156. At 10:59pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    A Scouser from Oxford you say? Surely you jest. There are no Liverpool fans from outside smelling distance of the Mersey, or so I have been lead to believe.

    Wish I was golfing tomorrow. But after last weeks attempt there has been talk of golf courses in Ireland not allowing me back.

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  • 157. At 11:04pm on 28 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    yep, it's true, he's got the tash and everything, he's a Liverpool native, good player too, former Woodcutters and S. Liverpool.

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  • 158. At 11:04pm on 28 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    by the way, he reckoned they'd be screwed if they sold Alonso!

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  • 159. At 11:06pm on 28 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    They're more screwed by keeping Benitez.

    Which is why I am happy my Save Rafa! campaign was such a success.

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  • 160. At 11:08pm on 28 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    lol classic.

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  • 161. At 00:03am on 29 Aug 2009, Rafa's Gaffa wrote:

    robbo

    no comment on the liverpool's defeat by villa?

    i would love ur take on rafa's misery..

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  • 162. At 00:12am on 29 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    By the way, gentlemen. Those of you who think that by slagging eduardo we have forgotten the sins of thier forebears... well, back off. The Drog, the Steven G, and the morten Gamst Pedersen have not been forgotten... it's just that the Brazilian Croat was the first of the season to be well and truly busted. Haven't see the Young plunge but I guess if it was contact-free then he can be put into programmes 1-6 as recommended in the original blog.

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  • 163. At 00:16am on 29 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    105. At 4:24pm on 28 Aug 2009, steventudor wrote:
    1) I am not saying "Robbo" should spend his time writing about climate change or the state of the economy. However this is a blog about sport in general and football in particular and the most important issues SHOULD be addressed more often and in more detail.

    They are. In other blogs. But that's not the point of Robbo's, as you yourself state. It's a bit like me turning on cbeebies and moaning about the lack of coverage of NHS reforms

    _________________________________________________________________________
    All right, mate. While I welcome your support I'm not sure the comparison helps. I'm at least CBBC standard.

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  • 164. At 00:44am on 29 Aug 2009, The Professor wrote:

    icecreammn wrote:

    I felt bad for Eduardo last season after his injury, and as much as I dislike Arsenal, I was happy to see him return to fitness and play so well for his team.
    Seeing this absurdity of a dive makes me lose any sympathy I once had. I hope karma comes around and teaches him a lesson.

    _________________________________

    Wow, such a sympathetic person...how on earth do CR, Gerrard, Messi and Drog make you feel if one tumble for Eduardo makes you want karma to strike him down?!!

    Thing is, Robbo loves talking about dives and divers. Unfortunately, in this instance, he had inadvertently added to the disproportionate media coverage of the incident. Eduardo deserves his ban, full stop. Wenger makes a good point about Babel's dive against Arsenal in Europe a couple of years ago. The Ashley Young penalty bore similarities to Eduardo's.

    Then there's the other sticky legal problem - how on earth can UEFA prove it? It's not like a punch in the face, or slapping the ball on the goal-line. Eduardo didn't wave his hands furiously demanding a pen, nor did he writhe around feigning injury. He went to ground and the ref blew for the pen instantly - so, surely there's an argument Eduardo was pulling an evasive manouevre for a contact that never came? I have a sneaky feeling if he'd gotten up and done an Arshavin - i.e. saying it wasn't a penalty - he wouldn't be in any trouble whatsoever. But then, in that scenario the pen would still have been given, it would still have been scored. The only difference would be that, because Eduardo told the referee he was wrong, he'd escape a two match ban. Which is ridiculous.

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  • 165. At 01:22am on 29 Aug 2009, etienne123 wrote:

    Robbo

    Eduardo's wasn't the only dive this week, what about Tony Hibbert's shocker at Burnley?

    I've spoken to a few lads who reckon Hibbert should be banned. All of them Everton fans ...

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  • 166. At 02:17am on 29 Aug 2009, Auqakuh wrote:

    By gum, we are a catty bunch in here sometimes aren't we?

    #53 - nice one. That'll wind up the ridiculous homophobic morons attempting to use sexual choice as an insult no end, I'm sure.

    Anyway, back to the football.

    Not going to comment on the blog as frankly I've long since accepted that Robbo's sole purpose is to get the old gears turning in a few 'eds while perhaps getting in the odd joke that might even make someone somewhere titter a bit.

    Fact is, diving - why we have to call it "simulation" I don't know, there's no flight stick involved - is a scourge on the modern game and claims from the fans of whatever $player's $club that "this kind of attention wasn't levelled at $other_player for $incident!" are a sign of a scourge of modern society: selective short and long term memory failure.

    There's a furore over every single incident, and the visibilty of the whining and complaining is, quite fairly, proportionate to the level of the competition it occurred in.

    As for dealing with the issue, perhaps we should hire a special, extra police force to go around the parks and schools and note the names of any kids diving around like little Gerrards, and then haul their parents into the town center for a good ol' wet sponge tossing by all comers.

    Face it, modern society applauds cheaters and liars and scumbags, so long as they wear nice clothes and appear on the telly every now and then. As long as that's true, football will be no different to any other walk of life.

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  • 167. At 02:22am on 29 Aug 2009, Auqakuh wrote:

    Also I'd like to pre-emptively address any refutals to my post that are of course on grounds unrelated to the content of said post:

    1. Yes, I posted at 2:17am and this is because clearly I have nothing better to do. However, I'm still cleverer than you are, because I can read.
    2. My username is hard to pronounce. That is indeed just so you can focus on that instead of any point I may make.
    3. Yes, I used "$" in my post. Those are variables, not indication that I am in fact a Yank in disguise.
    4. You can Google "dictionary" if you didn't understand any of the hard words in my post like "furore" or "so" or "the".
    5. I don't care if you disapprove of my use of "'eds". This is informal writing. The moment I say "u" instead of "you", however, I trust that you will bludgeon me to death with a badger's extracted cranium.

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  • 168. At 02:40am on 29 Aug 2009, Nick_Robertson wrote:

    To be quite frank, minimum 2 match bans for diving are what the authorities have to resort to. You can say what you want, but diving is cheating, and cheating has no part in any sport (Except Rugby, where the idea is to get away with as much as you can without the ref seeing ;P ). If diving wasn't so rampant, Edduardo may have been forgiven. But it's so wide-spread these days that an example has to be made to deter other potential offenders. The fact that he has potentially cost Celtic Millions of pounds means that a 2 match ban is pittence (You can argue as much as you want over whether Celtic could have gone on to win if Arsenal hadn't got the penalty, the fact is that we will never know).
    It's about time that diving in any form of the game was given harsher penalties, and that includes Ashley Young! I know it'll be far harder to enforce in the lower leagues, but they can only do what they can. It's not as if diving is a massive problem in the lower leagues at the moment anyway (More the ref being able to tell when a goal has been scored!)

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  • 169. At 06:32am on 29 Aug 2009, ZEUSFC wrote:

    It was Peres who when asked about "rolling around sniper-victim style, after a perfectly good tackle" justified himself, by suggesting that "you should give it a try: run as fast as you can and get someone to stick their leg out in front of you; see how many bones you both break!"

    i had a lot of respect for his honesty, as we had Becks doing the same thing at the time...

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  • 170. At 06:44am on 29 Aug 2009, iainmonty wrote:

    Just for people's interest, as I suspect many (including so-called professional footballers) are not familiar with this:

    From "The Laws of the Game"

    A penalty kick is awarded against a team that commits one of the ten offences for which a direct free kick is awarded, inside its own penalty area and while the ball is in play.

    A direct free kick is awarded to the opposing team if a player commits any of the following seven offences in a manner considered by the referee to be careless, reckless or using excessive force:

    • kicks or attempts to kick an opponent
    • trips or attempts to trip an opponent
    • jumps at an opponent
    • charges an opponent
    • strikes or attempts to strike an opponent
    • pushes an opponent
    • tackles an opponent

    Notice the use of the phrase "or attempts to". Contact does not have to be made for an offence to be committed. As the referee saw it, Boruc could not reach the ball, therefore it an "attempt to trip", which means it was a penalty. He did not book Boruc for the attempt, showing common sense while applying the laws. And if you want a translation of the word Boruc, "careless" would be pretty close.

    Presumably that's why UEFA, in a desparate attempt to single out Eduardo, have quoted a completely different law in an attempt to focus on this and not the far more serious issue of the re-emergence of large scale, organised hooliganism. Interesting that the English media, who normally have a go at Platini, have bought into this agenda.

    And just to be clear, I don't support any of the football teams already quoted here, I am a Partick Thistle supporter and therefore never likely to have to deal with this issue directly in European competition.

    It doesn't stop me noticing that Arsenal could have played 11 out on the night, rested their keeper and it would have made no more difference than had the penalty not been given, to the final result.

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  • 171. At 08:54am on 29 Aug 2009, gaylordmontenegro wrote:

    Arsenal supporter here, so I have to confess bias. I think Eduardo made the most of the challenge, but if you look at it from behind the goal it looks like there was contact. Yes, he made the most of it, but if there was any contact he has no case to answer. So lets stop calling him a cheat, shall we?

    What really annoys me though, is the way this has been treated in the media. Listening to the ITV commentary, you would have thought it was the end of football. There have been plenty of worse divers than Eduardo (Ronaldo, anyone?) who barely got a mention for cheating week after week, but because this is Arsenal we have to have a witch hunt.

    And yes, I do remember Pires; and yes, he was a diver.

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  • 172. At 10:02am on 29 Aug 2009, 78sum wrote:

    There are loads of responses saying how everyone has reacted really badly because it is an Arsenal player who dived. Do you not think it is because Celtic complained louder than anyone else before.
    I think it's about time someone kicked up enough of a fuss to be heard. Roll on every club complaining about every dive and every diver getting a 2 match ban. Soon enough there will be a hell of a lot less diving.

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  • 173. At 10:13am on 29 Aug 2009, veneztiger wrote:

    the irony is Arsenal have the respect badges on their shirts, other than that until video technology is introduced then incidents like this will continue.
    It takes less than 30 seconds in the NFL for the ref to decide if the right call was made, that's about the same time for the penalty to be set up and taken or the celebratary run to the corner flag and kiss the badge.
    Pretty pathetic the gooner fans claiming "our cheat isn't as bad as their cheat"
    Always knew this would happen bringing so many Johnny Foreigners into the English game, bloody EU !
    The last line is a joke !

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  • 174. At 10:19am on 29 Aug 2009, RavenW_BJFC wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 175. At 10:21am on 29 Aug 2009, 78sum wrote:

    RE. 74
    Don't drag Sheffield Wednesday into this. We have plenty on our plate already...

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  • 176. At 10:29am on 29 Aug 2009, BigShifty wrote:

    I think the ban went ahead because Celtic had Gordon Smith and the SFA behind it making big noises in the direction of cowardice from UEFA.
    To be honest tho we just felt very upset because we got pumped, complaining about the cheating just distracted from the giant gulf in quality, plus the national team has been hit hard by bad decisions alot in the last couple of years, I would imagine noises were made in that direction too.

    Still be giving in Uefa have jumped in at the deep end; as Arsene said, everyone will be making alot of noise about it in the future now...

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  • 177. At 10:32am on 29 Aug 2009, Alicanteharry wrote:

    gazutd said : I have often wondered why the authourities do nothing about cheating. Well practically nothing.

    I understand that one association won't bring in rules by themselves, if the FA started banning everyone for cheating tomorrow all the little prima donnas would be off to Spain on Sunday.

    But why don't FIFA, or at least UEFA do it? For all our joking its not that difficult. Immediate 5 match for the likes of Eduardo the other night would soon put an end to it. So why isn't it done? I can't even figure out how it makes more money for them not to do it.
    ----
    gazutd I nrmally agree 100% with you blogs and enjoy you running fights with the killjoys. Your last comment is absolutely correct and I think such a process should start right now - better late than never.

    however where I slightly disagree is your 2nd sentence about all the prima donas running off to Spain. The inference here that this as not an English problem as only johny foreigner does it. I watch both La liga and the EPL (ok on the box) and the Tom Daley disease is no more prevalent in Spain than in the EPL.

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  • 178. At 10:50am on 29 Aug 2009, msblogette wrote:

    I have read this blog many times but this is the first time I have made a comment. I can't understand why people take it so seriously. It is like others have stated light hearted and always funny so either lighten up or keep your mouths shut.

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  • 179. At 11:09am on 29 Aug 2009, 78sum wrote:

    I like the guy who is still torn by Rooney's dive dive in 2004. That's a man who loves his team...
    But the game has to take a stance against diving and cheating at some point as it seems to be getting worse. What really pains me is when I see little kids feigning injury because they've seen the pros do it on tv. So now is as good a time as ever.
    Shame Edwardo was singled out though as he's not one of the really frustrating guys that does it week in week out. Drogba does my head in. I would love to step on his toe, brush his elbow or almost make contact with him in the street and see him scream like the nancy that he is.

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  • 180. At 11:18am on 29 Aug 2009, pseudoxerox wrote:

    Not quite as bad as Gamst Pedersen or Gilardino though was it!

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  • 181. At 11:37am on 29 Aug 2009, Dave I wrote:

    I have watched England and English teams get conned for about 50 years, loads of moaning about cheating foreigners, but now that our teams are making it a level playing field, diving has become the crime of the century.
    Eduardo got a penalty, but would it have been less of a "crime" if he hadn't, or if it had been somewhere else on the pitch. In every game there are at least 10 incidents where someone "exagerates" contact. When does a nudge become a shove? When does the owner of the offending leg cease to be resposible for someone falling over it?
    So many questions, and no obvious answers!

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  • 182. At 11:39am on 29 Aug 2009, 78sum wrote:

    Remember Rivaldo at the world cup?
    Some dives are worth it for the comedy value...

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  • 183. At 11:59am on 29 Aug 2009, captainbildo wrote:

    "Same old tired cliche's rattled out

    JOG ON Robbo"

    Ha ha this gave me a right old chuckle. Isn't 'jog on' in itself a tired old cliche. Ok it's not the best blog I've ever read in the world but I appreciate the tounge in cheek style, always gives me a chuckle. Especially, as a fellow smog monster, when it's at the expense of the mags he he.

    Sheesh, "Jog on", copying lines from hard men in films definietly results in you becoming an internet hard man yourself. I am in awe at the innovative nature of your razor edged riposte my good man.

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  • 184. At 12:03pm on 29 Aug 2009, Stokerambo wrote:

    not funny, this is serious! that is precisely what should be done with divers and hooligans! Also humiliate the refs that get decisions horribly wrong! I would make you chief justice after the Revolution! Freedom for Boro!

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  • 185. At 12:05pm on 29 Aug 2009, Stokerambo wrote:

    The_Red_Rover: Arsenal aren't exactly and English team and Eduardo hails from Brazil. Celtic are a British team, but also have a fair few exotic types among their ranks

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  • 186. At 12:07pm on 29 Aug 2009, rudijay wrote:

    The reality is that whatever the player gets away with is affecting the result. To remedy that it is important that the use of cameras is used to rectify the mistake immediately and not to impose a pnalty to the player later.
    How does that rectify any injustice to the team who suffered?
    Extra refs is not the solution. It is those guys who are part of the problem by making the mistake in the first place.
    What is beyond me is why the solution they propose is more officials. It smells of "jobs for the boys" to me.
    Have a 4th official who can overrule a mistake and clarify where there is any doubt. It id better to have the occational delay BUT the correct result than have a miscarriage and everybody angry.

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  • 187. At 12:19pm on 29 Aug 2009, CheerUpBarryFry wrote:

    Any player caught diving in the area should have a point added to a "simulation bank".

    The next time the player wins a LEGITIMATE penalty it is declared null and void. A goal kick is awarded to the opposing team and a point is wiped from the players "simulation bank".

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  • 188. At 12:27pm on 29 Aug 2009, colebass wrote:

    Simple solution to a massive problem. Every time a player falls to the floor and play is stopped, the player spends an allocated period of time on the touchline. I believe 5 minutes seems like a nice number. If the player is genuine, 5 minutes allows ample time for the physio to tend to their injury. If the player is not genuine, well then they spend the time contemplating why their side is a man down for 5 minutes. This will also cut out the diving late on in close matches where the team with a narrow lead needs to kill time.

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  • 189. At 12:41pm on 29 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:

    At 10:32am on 29 Aug 2009, Alicanteharry wrote:

    however where I slightly disagree is your 2nd sentence about all the prima donas running off to Spain. The inference here that this as not an English problem as only johny foreigner does it. I watch both La liga and the EPL (ok on the box) and the Tom Daley disease is no more prevalent in Spain than in the EPL.

    ---

    Thanks Alicanteharry, you do know though that you will now be accused of wanting to marry me or something!

    I wasn't trying to have a go at La Liga, what I meant was that players are so reprehensible and only care about money, that if The FA brought in a cheating rule then they would just clear off to some league that didn't have the same rule.
    They'd much prefer to be able to con and cheat their way around the pitch than be honest about it, and that is the nub of the issue.

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  • 190. At 12:43pm on 29 Aug 2009, Dave I wrote:

    When a penalty can be awarded, legitimately, when there has been no contact, because of intention, how can anyone possibly say that there is an easy solution?
    The only solution is not to stick anything out that can be fallen over. Whilst that may sound silly, consider that a tackle should win the ball. What, exactly is the point of sticking a leg out. You win the ball or risk giving a free kick. Sticking a leg out can refer to any part of the body.

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  • 191. At 1:24pm on 29 Aug 2009, Alicanteharry wrote:

    hi Gazutd, sorry marriage is out of the question as her indoors might object however we could be pals.

    re the cheatibg rules I would hope that they would be europe wide, but you are right about the money issue - also UK taxation could make a huge difference as to who will want to play in the EPL in the next few seasons.

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  • 192. At 1:30pm on 29 Aug 2009, DorothysMate wrote:

    Firstly, I don't buy any of the excuses along the lines of 'he expected contact', 'he's just recovered from a horrific injury' etc. It was a dirty dive looking to win a penalty and that's it. For me however, the issue seems to be more about having a consistent protocol for dealing with diving, than about lambasting Eduardo's sense of moral decency. There seems no point in fuming at Eduardo individually when simulation is now such a common part of football. (See Catch 22's '"Suppose everyone acted that way."-"Then I'd certainly be a damn fool to act any other way, wouldn't I?"') The real issue is that there is just no consistency in dealing with the phenomenon that is simulation.

    If the referee had considered that Eduardo dived during the game, then the rules state that he should be shown a yellow card- so first off, I don't see where all this 2 game ban stuff has come from. It just seems that the media have got a bit exited with the new football season just underway, and the authorities have gone and jumped on the bandwagon. Therefore, this just seems to be case of needing clearer guidelines. (More generally, especially when it comes to- to video referee, or not to video referee?)

    Where there will inevitably be problems however, no matter how clear the guidelines, is that diving in general is such a grey area (granted Eduardo's example was more towards the black). Being a Liverpool fan, I remember fuming at Owen on many occasions for not having gone to ground easier than he did. And if he was playing for England then commentators would share my sentiment: "He looked like he was being fouled there, if he'd chosen to go down the ref would surely have pointed to the spot." And some folk will praise him to high heaven for maintaining the moral high ground- yet the chance is gone, and you go on to lose to a corking goal from a Lee Bowyer-esque fascist thug. So is it really so commendable to have stayed on your feet? If it was my team I'd rather we had popped the penalty in and taken the 3 points if I'm being honest. I mean out of all the injustices surrounding football- the scandalously priced tickets, the filthy rich players, the Abramovichs, Rupert Murdoch.
    Does no one else see the irony when Murdoch's Sky make millions from adverts following a post-match tirade in which a selection of former players complain that their modern counterparts play the game too cynically?

    This may seem a crazy notion but imagine if it was accepted as fair that players could attempt to deceive the ref in order to try and gain an advantage for their team, then every player would take a dive if the opportunity arose, and no team would be able to have any gripes; it would be a level playing field for all. If the player got caught then he could still be carded even. It would be up to him to assess the risks involved, but at least we would be done with this whole diving witch-hunt. I mean nowadays this seems to be the accepted attitude towards pulling a player down if they are past the defender and in a threatening position- just accept the yellow/red card and get on with it. I'm not even saying I'm particularly in favour of accepting diving as part of our game, but at the least, it would allow people would know where they stood.

    Just some food for thought...

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  • 193. At 1:42pm on 29 Aug 2009, hungaryfan wrote:

    The issue you've raised although treated in gest,is a very serious one, one which is ruining games especially those featuring players who practice the art of diving. With the speed of the English game it is sometimes very difficult for the ref to be in the right place at the right time hence when the diver is an accomplished one, such as Ronaldo, sometimes the Ref gets it wrong.
    One simple solution would be to establish a panel of accomplished retired refs who would examine TV footage of crutial diving decisions and pronounce accordingly.
    Any player deemed to be guilty of diving gets a 3 match suspension, a red card. A second offence would be followed with a 2 month suspension. In a very should period of time, diving would become eliminated from the game!

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  • 194. At 4:15pm on 29 Aug 2009, Big Hun wrote:

    as a Celtic fan I enjoyed your blog,but Celtic had to play the way they did look at the quality of the English team sorry the English team with no Englishmen in it I remember Gerrard making a lung bursting charge up the park persued by a defender when he got into the penalty area he collapsed in a heap never a penalty in a million years but he got one and the defender was red carded,I think they are going after Eduardo is that he is not high profile like gerrard,drogba or the king od divers ronaldo

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  • 195. At 6:09pm on 29 Aug 2009, adjan_poland wrote:

    I think there's a simple solution: Player who is fouled must not take a penalty. Did you notice who dive? It's the players who take penalties. Ronaldo, Eduardo, Gerrard, etc. It's simplier for them to dive because they know it's easier to score from the penalty spot.

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  • 196. At 6:28pm on 29 Aug 2009, hungaryfan wrote:

    And what did the Moderators say?

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  • 197. At 6:37pm on 29 Aug 2009, hungaryfan wrote:

    So I should receive a message explaining how I broke House Rules?

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  • 198. At 8:00pm on 29 Aug 2009, The Professor wrote:

    Auqakuh wrote:

    "There's a furore over every single incident, and the visibilty of the whining and complaining is, quite fairly, proportionate to the level of the competition it occurred in."

    Is this a serious comment? I understand that it is by-and-large true, but given the context of this blog it seems a bit silly. Celtic were never going to get through, penalty or no penalty - Boruc's reaction was akin to the decision being given in the Champion's League final with the score and 0-0! Isn't that the issue, that this is in fact a disproportionate reaction from virtually everyone, given that we've had years of dives in many more important games? If your rule of proportion were applied, Stevie G would miss half the season; Ronaldo and Morten Gamst Pedersen may as well retire! And that's ignoring the likes of Messi and Robben - and does anyone else remember Puyol's antics in the Champion's League final last year, doing his very best to get Ronaldo (of all people) into trouble? No ban for him though, oh no! Don't his actions apply to the rule UEFA have trotted out to charge Eduardo with?

    "...haul their parents into the town center..."

    CENTER? Either a very sly joke given your 'more intelligent than yow' caveat post, or you are indeed an inhabitant of North America...

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  • 199. At 8:39pm on 29 Aug 2009, kitincal wrote:

    Why do people keep saying diving is part of the game? It is in no coaching manual I have ever seen and I do not instruct the youngsters I teach to do so! In fact, I lay down the law and say that any of them who do not try to stay on their feet will leave the pitch!!!!!!!! Suffice to say I have a good little youth team that I am proud of.

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  • 200. At 8:58pm on 29 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Trotter, if you are around, bad luck today but then you should have know, especially given the nature of Robbo's blog, that cheaters always win.

    I'm sure you will see it but what happened was that Lucas eventually made a difference in a Liverpool shirt. He had a word with Alan Wiley who kindly gave Davis the 2 softest bookings in the history of football.

    Hopefully there will be a UEFA panel sitting to look at Lucas' conduct next week, somehow I doubt it.

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  • 201. At 9:33pm on 29 Aug 2009, Zootmac wrote:

    Cheer up, Gaz. Until today, I thought that Abou Diaby's own goal was buying Man C.

    Enjoy MOTD.

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  • 202. At 9:37pm on 29 Aug 2009, MizzTapara wrote:

    Did some dive today or Eduardo is still first on inquisiton list?
    Lets look at other angle everything what happens and what will happen-- broken Eduardo leg,now he is a diver and today Luka Modric is out for 3 month with broken leg? That 2 guys are in bond and it looks like some1 in England dont want them to play...That is not accident!It is not matter dive its not matter that England is a cradle of football, it seems that England dont know to lose a match so its good to put Modric away, speak nonsense about Eduardo...Now you just need to remove Olic and you did a good job. Like 1 brain said ---shame shame on YOU !

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  • 203. At 9:52pm on 29 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    Hey Gaz, I missed it but read all about it, no worries, he's a soft tart but what goes around comes around. Our old milkman was called Lucas, wonder if they're related. I hope the tits eat his cream this winter.

    Got back 20 mins in to the ManU game, oh what fun that was. Won enough for a split and fish but can't find a chippy. Old Wenger's hit the bottle too hard and been sent off, quite right too but everyone seemed to enjoy it! Eboue was a riot too.

    Why was SAF sporting a sky blue tie? (This is what I've been reduced to).

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  • 204. At 9:53pm on 29 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Anyone care to translate?

    I'm happy enough Zoot, we get the Irish version of MOTD around 8pm with thankfully no Hansen, Lawerenson or even worse Lee Dixon and God forbid Mr. Shearer.

    It does have Graeme Souness though which kind of defeats the above.

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  • 205. At 9:56pm on 29 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Apparently you can only buy blue clothing in Manchester these days. There have been some retail buyouts, and there's no chance of Fergie heading down the road to buy anything in the neighbouring city. He wouldn't even buy a Lescott from there. Mind you given the price he went for I think it's been renamed the European Capital of taking your arm off.

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  • 206. At 10:06pm on 29 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    I'll try and translate....she reckons there's a conspiracy in place to crock or get suspended all members of the Croatian squad that play in England and thereby help ease England's passage to South Africa!

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  • 207. At 10:10pm on 29 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Oh right I see. This would be in the group that England are currently way out in front in, and has such rubbish opposition that they would have to play 11 Gary Nevilles to lose their WC place.

    Definitely must be it.

    Couldn't possibly have been because Eduardo actually dived.

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  • 208. At 10:14pm on 29 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    Eduardo dived? Who dared to suggest that?

    By the way, only ten Gary Neville's and David James, this is how you remember....

    Ten Gary Neville
    There's only ten Gary Nevilles
    Ten Gary Nevilles
    There's only ten Gary Nevilles

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  • 209. At 10:21pm on 29 Aug 2009, MizzTapara wrote:

    Where is your brain Gazutd? Dont be like sheep,move your brain from grass and start thinking...England have a passage to South Africa and i didnt said anything about that.

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  • 210. At 10:24pm on 29 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    My brain is too mangled trying to understand.

    It's a conspiracy by the Robbo Blog Detractors I tell you.

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  • 211. At 10:30pm on 29 Aug 2009, MizzTapara wrote:

    There is too much money around and in football so conspiracy ,fauls with purpose are on pitch.

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  • 212. At 10:31pm on 29 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Irn_Bru is that you?

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  • 213. At 10:35pm on 29 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    lol

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  • 214. At 11:32pm on 29 Aug 2009, Zootmac wrote:

    207 Gaz

    "...11 Gary Nevilles to lose their WC place"?

    I thought that it was "11 pipers piping". The "Gary Nevilles" lyric doesn't even go with the tune.

    If the "WC place" is a feeble attempt to return to toilet humour, I'm out of here. Me and Irn-Bru both.

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  • 215. At 11:32pm on 29 Aug 2009, Zootmac wrote:

    Great bog, Blobbo.

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  • 216. At 11:36pm on 29 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    #215

    Kiss-ass

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  • 217. At 11:43pm on 29 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    eh up, Zoot walks in at half past elevenon a Saturday night, he must be flush!

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  • 218. At 11:48pm on 29 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Oh for goodness sake, it's really going down the pan now.

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  • 219. At 11:50pm on 29 Aug 2009, Zootmac wrote:

    Maybe Irn-Bru MizzTapara and IRA-ABU have never forgiven him.

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  • 220. At 11:51pm on 29 Aug 2009, iainmonty wrote:

    Just for people's interest, as I suspect many (including so-called professional footballers and pundits) are not familiar with this:

    From "The Laws of the Game"

    A penalty kick is awarded against a team that commits one of the ten offences for which a direct free kick is awarded, inside its own penalty area and while the ball is in play.

    A direct free kick is awarded to the opposing team if a player commits any of the following seven offences in a manner considered by the referee to be careless, reckless or using excessive force:

    • kicks or attempts to kick an opponent
    • trips or attempts to trip an opponent
    • jumps at an opponent
    • charges an opponent
    • strikes or attempts to strike an opponent
    • pushes an opponent
    • tackles an opponent

    Notice the use of the phrase "or attempts to". Contact does not have to be made for an offence to be committed. As the referee saw it, Boruc could not reach the ball; therefore it was an "attempt to trip", which means it was a penalty. He did not book Boruc for the attempt, showing common sense while applying the laws. And if you want a translation of the word Boruc, "careless or reckless" would be pretty close.

    Presumably that's why UEFA, in a desperate attempt to single out Eduardo, have quoted a completely different law in an attempt to focus on this and not the far more serious issue of the re-emergence of large scale, organised hooliganism. Interesting that the English media, who normally have a go at Platini, have bought into this agenda.

    And I did notice that Arsenal could have played 11 out on the night, rested their keeper and it would have made no more difference than had the penalty not been given, to the final result.

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  • 221. At 11:55pm on 29 Aug 2009, oldstafford wrote:

    170&220 You seem to be repeating yourself, unless I'm drunk, although after reading Mizztapara that may well be the case!

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  • 222. At 11:57pm on 29 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    220 thanks for that but why did you need to reshuffle the end and add a bit?

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  • 223. At 11:58pm on 29 Aug 2009, oldstafford wrote:

    209 'move your brain from grass'
    oh, that may be my problem, not the drink.

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  • 224. At 00:02am on 30 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    It's amazing how things repeat on you around midnight on a Saturday

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  • 225. At 00:04am on 30 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    223

    As long as she doesn't tell us to remove our brain from the gambling, rock n roll and endless stream of meaningless 'relationships' then I think Trotter and Zoot will be ok.

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  • 226. At 00:06am on 30 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    it might be a lass, they often have to tell us at least twice.

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  • 227. At 00:09am on 30 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    It's their own fault, if it was interesting we'd listen.

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  • 228. At 00:13am on 30 Aug 2009, Zootmac wrote:

    I watched the Barcelona-Shartak game last night. When the Messi tete-a-tete occurred, I immediately thought that Wenger would latch onto it. Sure enough, in his televised post-match interview after the ManU game, he was right there.

    Should Messi receive a two match European ban in response to an incident which was fully captured on camera, but only partially seen by the referee? And, if not, why should retrospective punishment be applied to Eduardo for an incident, again only partially seen by the referee, but fully captured on film, which some observers might view as being less serious than the Messi offence?

    One of the key problems is the sheer quality of television cameras and camera work. It allows a virtually immediate analysis of key moments in football matches - but referees are denied access to that quality of information. As a result, referees and officials can be made to appear foolish.

    Rugby Union has comfortably adapted to the use of film evidence in determining the outcome of key moments in a match which referees cannot reasonably be allowed to decide upon. If everybody else can see the film evidence from football matches, such as the Eduardo farce, and be allowed to come to more accurate decisions, why is the facility denied to referees?

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  • 229. At 00:15am on 30 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    That's a very good question Zoot, could you repeat it please?

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  • 230. At 00:19am on 30 Aug 2009, Zootmac wrote:

    And here I was, trying to be all profound, and blend in with the all-new Robbo-McNulty ultra-serious blog.

    I'm wasted on you lot.

    Good night.

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  • 231. At 00:21am on 30 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    Noooo, I think it's a brilliant question and one that must be asked but it's only the FA, FIFA and all the other sweet FA's that can answer it.

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  • 232. At 00:21am on 30 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    ......and I'll sign your petition as soon as it's ready.

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  • 233. At 00:30am on 30 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Zoot are you drunk? Far too sensible.

    I think the problem with allowing decisions to be made during the match is the whole stop-start thing. Whereas if decisions are made afterwards, like Eduardo getting a ban, the it will stop the stupidity.

    Of course this just happens to be because Eduardo is the one in the spotlight at the minute. It has to be global and it has to be enforced properly. Cheating can be eradicated very quickly with the right action.

    It's simple, if a player is seen to be cheating, no matter in what way, immediate 3-5 match ban. It'll soon disappear. Just don't let the lawyers start telling us that matches have to be played again etc etc, that's farcical.

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  • 234. At 00:54am on 30 Aug 2009, Chapaccino wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 235. At 00:58am on 30 Aug 2009, Chapaccino wrote:

    Sorry for the spelling mistakes and general grammer mistakes guys! It was late and I am tired and I had a look on Newcastle's website so I could discover the horror of their away kit and it quite frankly blinded me!
    Sorry again,
    Cheers
    JC18

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  • 236. At 01:05am on 30 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    JC, well said. Why is it though that even Robbo has forecast Spurs a better league finish than you? Oh ye of little faith!

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  • 237. At 08:59am on 30 Aug 2009, iainmonty wrote:

    I made the comment at 170. I've only just found out about the repeat at 220 and have no idea how it got there. Uusally when the cheap BBC technology posts twice it happens one after the other, not with a massive gap in the middle.

    It certainly wasn't me.

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  • 238. At 11:38am on 30 Aug 2009, IAmTheK wrote:

    I cant talk because Ronaldo was in Man Utd. The difference here was IMO, with Ronaldo's, most often there was contact and he'd go down easily. And the lad was a really good footballer so it just seemed to gloss over his bad antics. Cos 1 day he'd do the stupid thing and dive and the next he does something so marvellous that its all forgotten. Right now that he's gone everyone wants to take his place, in the scoring charts and in the diving charts as well.
    And of course since its Eduardo who's done it in a high profile game within a team who are known to play beautiful and fair football everyone's up in arms. IMO very unfair. Rightly so that this will go a long way to stamp it out but the poor guy. But here in Scotland they are doing that already (retrospective punishment) so they had every right to make noise about it. The earlier people stop the better.

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  • 239. At 11:49am on 30 Aug 2009, IAmTheK wrote:

    @Zoot
    The answer to your question is simple. Rugby is already a stop start game so its easy to add more stopping and starting.

    Imagine your football team 1 goal down with 3 minutes to go. They seem to be on the up and score a goal that crosses the line and the ref gives it but the opposition protest. So ref stops games, checks replay and its crossed the line (or not). Anyway the flow of the game stops and the momentum is gone. That break in play has potentially cost you the game. In my experience, opposition players try to slow down your game when you are on the up and bringing dispute resolution in there doesn't help. Imagine how managers see incidents differently even when they've seen the replay. We all know how footballers are; even when they've clearly kicked the ball out, the raise their hands to claim..
    Some technology is ok, eg goal line anything more (replays etc) will just ruin the flow of the game.

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  • 240. At 12:15pm on 30 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    237 Is it possible that you posted by accident when you were still editing it and then posted again when you were finished? The last 2 paragraphs are different so you either posted twice or the BBC decided to edit it and add their own thoughts! If this doesn't explain it can I use the excuse that all my stupid posts were written by the BBC?

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  • 241. At 12:17pm on 30 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    225 Are you suggesting that my relationship with Zoot is meaningless?

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  • 242. At 12:19pm on 30 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    225
    "My Rock and Roll is putting on weight" - a line from none other than ARC OF THE DIVER by Steve Winwood. He's always on topic that Gaz!

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  • 243. At 12:31pm on 30 Aug 2009, Zootmac wrote:

    239 kokomanutd

    I agree that too much use of technology could ruin the flow of a game, but it would surely be possible to establish clearly when television evidence can be called for (eg the Eduardo penalty). Instances would be relatively rare if proper guidelines were set down. Otherwise, of course, we would have even more nonsense from players, such as those imaginary card wavers, who seek to get another player booked, diversifying by appearing to play charades with the ref in their time-wasting, game-stopping attempts to extract a TV moment.

    I suspect that, in an environment progressively dominated by diving footballers, cricketers who won't walk, and rugby coaches pinching the ketchup sachets from MacDonalds, technology will progressively be called into use.

    The current, developing, situation is worrying. Some of us don't like mayonnaise.

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  • 244. At 12:39pm on 30 Aug 2009, Zootmac wrote:

    233 Gaz

    You are quite correct. I was slightly tired and emotional whilst posting last night.

    It's slightly concerning that, when I try to say something remotely sensible, it's just assumed that I'm razzled.

    Much more encouraging is that there weren't too many mistakes in the prose.

    Have you noticed that, occasionally, when Robbo posts a riposte late at night, the quality of his writing marginally disintegrates? I have this unhealthy suspicion that Carly is lacing his Babychams with a view to enticing him Down Under.

    He should be careful, that lad.

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  • 245. At 1:05pm on 30 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Zoot I was under the impression that the quality of Robbo's writing couldn't disintegrate any more. At least that's what we are continually told on here. If it does in fact get worse late at night then God help us when they allow late night internet access on the wards, imagine a quick witted reply from JDR or PMS after a Robbo double visioned post.

    Hey, look, PaulMcShane's name can be shortened to PMS. How come we never picked up on that before. The jokes we could have made about Post Moderenist Styling would have had them rolling in the aisles.

    At least you get an assumption that you say something remotely sensible, even if you are suffering from an attack of alcohol. I never say anything worthwhile.

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  • 246. At 1:07pm on 30 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Trotter your relationship with Zoot is not meaningless, the phrase "Will you civil partnership me?" should never be considered without meaning.

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  • 247. At 1:07pm on 30 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Mayonnaise rocks.

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  • 248. At 3:05pm on 30 Aug 2009, aisyrfhasdfglhg wrote:

    Hang them all

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  • 249. At 3:46pm on 30 Aug 2009, iplusplus wrote:

    There's a simple solution to this simulation quandry. If a player dives then the ref should award the other team a goal, that'll make the cheaters think twice and may actually make them play like men rather than big girl's blouses.

    As for the riots, have we suddenly quantum leaped back to the 80's?

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  • 250. At 4:10pm on 30 Aug 2009, JoeDavisRoach wrote:

    I was hoping that "Robbo" (or Niall) might have taken on board some of the justified criticism he received on his last blog. However yet again I see he has failed to raise his already disturbingly low standards of outdated and stereotyped comedic journalism. Was I optimistic in expecting maybe even the most marginal of deviations from the tired, fictional working class northern? Apparently so. Once again we have the brainless ramblings and cringing one liners from the "Blue Bell". Talk about flogging a dead horse. Here we have a situation whereby license fees are going to fund what is the uninspired and repetitve blog going. Out of curiosity "Robbo"/Niall - how long does it take you write these blogs. Im guessing less than ten minutes......

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  • 251. At 4:29pm on 30 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Woooooooooooooo

    He's back!!

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  • 252. At 5:29pm on 30 Aug 2009, Auqakuh wrote:

    @198:

    Sly joke, although I've been known to mix up my centres and centers due to overexposure to the Yanks.

    I'll note that my point on reaction is largely pointed at media attention and more importantly (since the media are in my opinion generally pretty stupid) fan reaction (I won't comment on intelligence levels of fans - they do that for themselves), not whether or not someone is banned. I honestly do not think banning divers will help the situation at all; the only people capable of stamping this out of the game are the managers who condone such pifflepaffle from their players. Perhaps we should fine the manager every time one of his players dives.

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  • 253. At 5:33pm on 30 Aug 2009, Auqakuh wrote:

    199 - do you often lose to a late penalty?

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  • 254. At 5:58pm on 30 Aug 2009, dempsi1997 wrote:

    @13 Spitfire:

    "The way Boruc was coming at him..."

    You mean the way any half-decent keeper would've come out in that situation?

    If Eduardo is going to panic or dive any time a keeper makes a fair challenge, maybe he shouldn't be playing.

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  • 255. At 8:06pm on 30 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    Gaz, see post #120!

    250 "Northern" what? You need the ER? I'm sure I speak for all your readers in wishing you a speedy recovery.

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  • 256. At 9:10pm on 30 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    #250

    JDR! Stop it now! You're just sounding more and more like some bloke I'm paying to keep winding up the poor regulars. If there's owt more 'repetitive' than my blogs it's your response to them. And at least I vary my subject matter.
    Now. Sleep.

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  • 257. At 9:57pm on 30 Aug 2009, JoeDavisRoach wrote:

    "Robbo"/Niall

    Theres an easy solution to this - an upping of standards and dare I suggest it, a new approach.

    The "Robbo" character is stale. Badly stale. I am aware you use him as the engine power what is supposed to be a tongue in cheek blog but dear God, 3 times a week? In fairnes, if "Robbo" was remotely funny it might just about be allowable but the humour is desperately poor. I mean no one even understoond the Boruc joke (was it a joke?). The bbc clearly feel the need to have some sort of "joke" blog but seem to have forgotten that the blog needs to be funny in the first place. And why the need for the same stereotyped views of a fictional character ad nauseum? Surely you can provide a bit more variety than that Niall?

    As for me being some "paid" guy to "wind up the regulars" - hardly. Im aware that there is a core of 3/4 guys that seem to fancy themselves as comedic geniuses themselves and use this blog space to try and showcase their talents - perhaps hoping to have their own blogs someday? Im more than confident they could produce an equally terrible blog but its worth noting that they dont really seem to engage in much discussion on the blogs material as opposed to polishing each others egos with low grade humour. Admittedly they will defend your bi-weekly nonsense but probably more out of fear that they wont have a forum to have their daily comedy sessions if someone in the bbc sees sense and removes/revamps this blog.

    Finally Niall, I would again encourage you to broaden your horizons and at least attemp a blog without the shopworn "Robbo" brand of humour. Im not asking for anything too drastic I feel here, one step at a time.

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  • 258. At 11:09pm on 30 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    It's all so sad. Anybody that misses out all the apostrophes in a post should be ;
    1. Sent to apostrophe school and be banned from posting for a month.
    2. Forced to type their next post with all 18 layers of cling film removed from their keyboard.
    3. Forced to do something else with Noel Edmonds and a muppet of Robbo's choosing.

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  • 259. At 11:38pm on 30 Aug 2009, oldstafford wrote:

    257 "JDR" Boring man

    There’s an easy solution to this - and dare I suggest it, a new approach.

    The "JDR" posts are stale. Badly stale. I am aware you use them as the engine power for what is supposed to be a tongue up your own rear but dear God, 3 times a week? In fairness, if you were remotely right it might just about be allowable but your posts are desperately poor. I mean no one even understands your repetitiveness (are they a joke?). The BBC clearly feels the need to have some sort of "joker" posting but seem to have forgotten that you’re not relevant in the first place. And why the need for the same stereotyped views of a boring character ad nauseum? Surely you can provide a bit more variety than Niall?

    As for you being some "paid" guy to "wind up the regulars" - hardly. I’m aware that there is a core of 3/4 guys that seem to fancy themselves as comedic geniuses themselves and use this blog space to try and showcase their talents - perhaps hoping to have their own blogs someday, I hope so. I’m more than confident they could produce quite good blogs but its worth noting that they don’t really seem to engage in much discussion on the blogs’ material much like yourself but so what, that’s half the fun? I like to polish pictures of myself admittedly (?). You will defend your bi-weekly (3 times a week is not bi-weekly by the way) nonsense but probably more out of fear that you won’t have a forum to have your daily rant sessions if someone in the BBC sees sense and removes your posts.

    Finally JDR, I would again encourage you to broaden your horizons and at least attempt a constructive post without the shop-worn "JDR" brand of boring self righteous drivel or just go elsewhere. I’m not asking for anything too drastic I feel here, one step at a time.

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  • 260. At 11:39pm on 30 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Wow! Where to start?

    Well I just seen (or is it saw) Inglorious B******DS. It's rubbish. More Tarantino self indulgent claptrap. But I suppose that's a bit off topic.

    Trotter, sorry I missed your PMS notification, I promise I don't ignore your posts!

    Anyway, on to JDR. Anyone else notice the "3 times a week" / "bi-weekly" mistake? I thought it was funny anyway.

    Now before someone massages my ego I better get to the case in point. Joe, please Joe, pretty please Joe, I am begging you, please tell me exactly what your problem is? It can't just be the fact this blog exists, it has gone well beyond that. Clearly you feel Robbo has harmed you in a previous life or something.

    And as for us "comedy geniuses" (or should that be genii) all I can say is that what is the problem with a couple of people wanting to have a bit of craic now and again? Seriously?

    It's gone beyond making a joke out of you Joe, you manage that quite well yourself, at this stage I am seriously worried for your mental health.

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  • 261. At 11:41pm on 30 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Oldstafford, I dip my cap to you sir.

    (Please note that it is not a tired cliche of a Northern cloth cap but a trendy new baseball one)

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  • 262. At 08:07am on 31 Aug 2009, iainmonty wrote:

    240, thanks for the suggestion but I only posted once and didn't try to edit or resubmit.

    I've looked at the second post again and the only reference removed is to my team, Partick Thistle. Why would I do that? I was hoping to make the point that I had no agenda as a supporter of Celtic/Aresenal/Man U/Liverpool.....

    Presumably the BBC have decided PTFC are far too humble for this debate. Any comments Robbo?

    Oh, and for the benefit of the sexist half-wits who tried to explain me repeating myself, I'm male. The clue is in the first 4 letters of my user name. If you still don't understand because of the spelling, find a Scotsman and ask them to explain.

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  • 263. At 09:56am on 31 Aug 2009, JoeDavisRoach wrote:

    No surprises as the usual suspects rally to the fictional northerner "Robbo's" defence.

    First off - Ive no real problem with the likes of GazUtd, oldstafford,TrotterUSA etc having their own sideshow on the blog - they clearly look forward to their daily comedy club routines. This is fine by me.

    My problem is, and Im surprised this isnt crystal clear by now - Robbo's blog. To summarize:

    1. First off their is a genuine need to establish if a blog of this nature is belongs on the site - especially under a "football" blog tab.
    2. In the event its established that a blog like this can be justified (funded by license payers fees) - surely there must be some kind of quality control in place and some genuine standards to be met. Why are we subjected to the same overused, cliche mad fictional northerner using the same jaded outlook on sport from a stereotyped working class viewpoint?
    3. The blog is obviously designed to amuse - it doesnt. It also manges to fail to acheive any real point - very little style or substance etc
    4. The repition on the blog is horrific, the humour is mundane.
    5. I understand "Robbo" is intended to be fictional (despite what some people on this blog believe and notwithsttanding the fact he replies "in character) - but such is poorness of quality, repetitive nature and lack of humour it is next to impossible to be absorbed into "Robbo's fictional world of the Blue Bell". Instead I just imagine Niall sitting at his laptop churning out his next monstrosity as quick as possible with almost no effort.

    These are my main grievances. And the danger is if standards are allowed to slip (or remain painfully low) then license fees will continue to be wasted and more and more "Robbo" like articles will appear at the expense of worthwhile articles. As mentioned before, Im not entirely writing off Niall as a "comedic journalist" or whatever title he grants himself in the bbc but I would challenge him to extend the scope of his writings and produce some varied work rather than continually pushing out hastily written and low grade humour.

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  • 264. At 09:59am on 31 Aug 2009, Zootmac wrote:

    When ah wor a lad, ah couldn't go out an' play wi' t'other kids 'cos we wor so poor me mam couldn't afford t' buy us clothes.

    When ah wor 14, me dad bought me a cap so ah could look out t' window.



    You hear heart-rending reminiscences like Colin Compton's. And there are still people who think it's funny to make jokes about Northerners and their caps.

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  • 265. At 10:12am on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    At least you Northern Englanders only get made fun of about cloth caps or the inability to wear a long sleeved t-shirt.

    Try coming from Northern Ireland and moving South, you never get tired of the violent, gun-toting, bomber jokes.

    JDR seriously, take everyone's advice and for your own sake just stop now. It has gone beyond a joke now and you are just going to do yourself some harm, you are way beyond just looking stupid.

    Look, there will be a new blog today (I think), just do yourself a favour and ignore it. No matter what your obsessiveness tells you, you don't need to read it and definitely don't need to comment on it. Go on, you know you can do it.

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  • 266. At 10:44am on 31 Aug 2009, Manos_de_Piedra wrote:

    To be honest I find JDRs one man war on Robbo the most amusing thing on this blog.

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  • 267. At 11:22am on 31 Aug 2009, PaulMcShane wrote:

    Well its not like JDR is alone on this (although clearly no one is a more vocal critic of Niall than that man). There have been quite a few different posters commenting on this blogs poorness.

    I don’t think its good enough to say that because the blog entertains a handful of devout regulars that the critics should be ignored. I’d say any old mickey mouse blog would still be able to find a few that it entertains. The difference here is this is quite a prominent blog on bbc which is probably one of the most popular websites out there. The bar is higher and when something falls below that bar, in this case miles below, it’s status should be reviewed.

    Maybe Niall could setup Robbo somewhere else and bring his 5 or 6 worshippers with him and then make a fresh attempt at a light hearted blog which justifies the tax payers funding.

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  • 268. At 12:37pm on 31 Aug 2009, cransonssweatband wrote:

    Number 74 - the dive you refer to was not Graham Hyde, but Gordon Watson. I remember being embarassed about it at the time, and even reflecting that we deserved the 6-1 thrashing we received as retribution for what was the worst dive ever witnessed!

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  • 269. At 2:07pm on 31 Aug 2009, kevfullo wrote:

    ah the smell of caps...do you mean the ones on paper rolls or the fiddly plastic ones?

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  • 270. At 2:27pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    PMS, you're too funny, who are you the Blog police? Perhaps you head up a universally accepted blog rating organisation?

    JDR, thanks for your summary, the summary comes at the end right? So there won't be any need to re-summarize? Hopefully that's it and you're all done now?

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  • 271. At 3:01pm on 31 Aug 2009, Auqakuh wrote:

    267:

    The bar is higher? Have you read McNulty's blog, like... ever?

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  • 272. At 3:20pm on 31 Aug 2009, ViscountGrey wrote:

    All these people moaning about there being worse divers out there than Eduardo - like the Ronaldo's and Drogba's just need to remember that this was the major problem highlighted last season, and therefore at all meetings and briefings in the summer break, refs et al. have had drummed into them that we "must crack down on diving".... Eduardo may not be a habitual diver (in that unlike Ronaldo he doesn't collapse EVERY time someone looks at him), but his was the first high profile case of the season, so the standard needed to be set.

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  • 273. At 4:12pm on 31 Aug 2009, kieron4lfc wrote:

    bad blog..will never ever read any of you're blogs again ever..never ever ever ever..never again I tell ya

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  • 274. At 4:13pm on 31 Aug 2009, kieron4lfc wrote:

    Why is Gerrard being branded a diver? can anyone name 3 times that his dived please?

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  • 275. At 4:34pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    JDR
    It's time we knew who you are. Are you the English teacher who told us I never get nowhere with grammar like mine - and here I am?
    Are you that numpty from St.Pat's whose Dad tried to start a scrap with my Dad after a dodgy challenge of mine in a school match? (Before Vinnie Jones I was the original holding midfielder).
    Oh are you one of them poor saps who stands in the rain with a 'Golf Sale' placard and spends that time building up less than flattering pictures of people whose lives you imagine are easier than yours?
    Or are you the Head of Comedy at Channel 4?

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  • 276. At 4:35pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    274
    I had absolutely no clue why anybody would ever level such an accusation at Stevie G. So, prompted by your question I started typing Steven Gerrard d..... into my google toolbar and the word "dives" came up. Eh up I thought, perhaps there's something to this. Moving on, it turns out that there's a whole slew of Stevie G. diving compilations, here's a small sampling for your viewing pleasure.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVb2gbMtN3I

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  • 277. At 4:37pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    Here's another good one! The reaction from the keeper and SG himself make it even better.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qqjx6IyWxjo

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  • 278. At 4:38pm on 31 Aug 2009, DenistheGenius wrote:

    can remember more than 3, but shouldn't 1 be enough? CL 2007 for one -unfortunately, my photographic memory is no good with dates ;)

    p.s. but fortunately, there's a little thing called youtube that Stevie G and the like cannot hide from.
    DISCLAIMER to all you Three Lions/Pool fans: if you want to maintain the fantasy image you have of Captain Fantastic; whatever you do, do NOT search youtube with "Steven Gerrard dives"
    your soul will be crushed without fail.

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  • 279. At 4:40pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    But none of them compare to the dive that the DJ took in that bar, thereby cancelling out all of Stevies dives. If someone else does it that makes it ok you see.

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  • 280. At 4:53pm on 31 Aug 2009, PaulMcShane wrote:

    Losing the plot a bit there Niall. Unable to take some constructive criticism?

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  • 281. At 5:05pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    The chip on JDR's shoulder has returned, I thought you were leaving.

    Have a look in that dictionary of Irn-Bru's if you can and check the words "constructive" and "criticism", they're both under C so shouldn't be too hard for you to find.

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  • 282. At 5:13pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    It's Robbo and mate the point surely is that despite the criticism, constructive or otherwise, there has been no change to the style and substance of this blog because what JDR and some others don't make a ha'porth worth of difference. The fact that you're still around pushing an agenda that has nil effect except to bewilder and ultimately irritate other posters is starting to look like the actual reason for your contribution.
    But you are right in one respect. I am losing the plot.

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  • 283. At 5:13pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    Speaking of chips, where's RBA?

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  • 284. At 5:13pm on 31 Aug 2009, ChuckleBrother2 wrote:

    275. At 4:34pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    JDR
    It's time we knew who you are. Are you the English teacher who told us I never get nowhere with grammar like mine - and here I am?

    ------------------------------------------------------------

    This is a rather bizzare comment. I'm sure that whatever interview process you went through for the BBC to get this blog you didn't actually use "me" instead of "my" during or any other such examples of poor grammar. Unless you've gone completely insane and now actually believe you're "Robbo Robson"...

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  • 285. At 5:16pm on 31 Aug 2009, DenistheGenius wrote:

    hey Trotter - nice simultaneous Stevie G myth busting...guess you beat me to the scoop by a minute or so. not that it's news, but it seems to get erased in the public memory pretty quickly.
    just like i'm sure Rooney's dive (yes - "played for it" is the same as "dived") will be forgotten by tomorrow, save for Gooners.

    question for Robbinho: does your colleague Phil "don't call me Mc**mpty" McNulty literally have a blind spot as big as a Mac truck, or is it just in his blogs? he's somehow avoided the question of the Rooney pen despite the majority of 300 posts debating it at length.
    and why do you get to use the term "**mpty" and i don't? Old Trafford Rules, eh Robbo? ;)

    look forward to hearing you tell it like it was concerning the most recent case of Old Trafford Effect!

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  • 286. At 5:16pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    Argghhh!!!

    Missed out a word - corrected below!

    Someone find out where he lives and unstick his lap-top from his lap! Can't you do it Paul McShane? You seem to get on well with the bloke?
    ________________________________________________________________________

    282. At 5:13pm on 31 Aug 2009, you wrote:
    It's Robbo and mate the point surely is that despite the criticism, constructive or otherwise, there has been no change to the style and substance of this blog because what JDR and some others write don't make a ha'porth worth of difference. The fact that you're still around pushing an agenda that has nil effect except to bewilder and ultimately irritate other posters is starting to look like the actual reason for your contribution.
    But you are right in one respect. I am losing the plot.


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  • 287. At 5:17pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:



    Good grief (trust me I wanted to type worse), but some people really do have a humour bypass don't they. Not to mention a common sense one.

    I am beginning to believe that the Holy Trinity of JDR, Chuckle and PMS are in fact one person now, there can't possibly be 3 people that dim can there? Well outside a Newcastle Board Room obviously.

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  • 288. At 5:18pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    Denis - you might be disappointed re Rooney's pen - but not re Arshavin's non-pen!

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  • 289. At 5:19pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Robbo, bewildered I definitely am.

    Irrated? Well only in the way that a crying child would irritate you, annoying for a while but ultimately you know they just don't know any better.

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  • 290. At 5:21pm on 31 Aug 2009, JoeDavisRoach wrote:

    275. At 4:34pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    Robbo/Niall

    Who exactly am I replying to here - the fictional "Robbo" or his pyschotic creator?

    If its the imaginery "Robbo" then you may refer to me as "Johnno Johnson" - a workingclass half wit who resides in the Red Bell and likes to "call it as I see it".

    If you are for once dropping the guise of the fictional northerner then I can assure you I am none of the aforementioned people. Like I said before - I am not saying you dont have the capability to be a witty writer, I am merely saying "Robbo" is a load of rehashed tosh. Are you not prepared to try to produce something different. Surely you cant be enjoying writing this trash two or three times a week as it reeks of hastily thrown together god-awful jokes and a predictable outlook from a stereotyped performer. I am just someone who is trying to raise the standards by pointing out the blindingly obvious.

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  • 291. At 5:23pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    284. At 5:13pm on 31 Aug 2009, ChuckleBrother2 wrote:
    275. At 4:34pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    JDR
    It's time we knew who you are. Are you the English teacher who told us I never get nowhere with grammar like mine - and here I am?

    ------------------------------------------------------------

    This is a rather bizzare comment. I'm sure that whatever interview process you went through for the BBC to get this blog you didn't actually use "me" instead of "my" during or any other such examples of poor grammar. Unless you've gone completely insane and now actually believe you're "Robbo Robson"...

    _________________________________________________________________________

    Looks like you missed out on the deliberate and I thought quite smart use of the double negative in that comment. Tsk. I do try and appeal to you Tefal-heads but...

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  • 292. At 5:25pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    Denis, me aghastnessmeter peaked and I felt morally obliged to conduct an immediate, thorough and one-sided investigation!

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  • 293. At 5:26pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    There must be a hotline to numptville.

    Either that or the wards are so close they can just shout to eachother.

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  • 294. At 5:29pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    Dear Johnno Johnson
    Pyschotic creator? Pyschotic!!! There's nowt makes me more mad than a mis-spelling of psychotic from someone who's taken some sort of unearned high ground!!!
    Anyway Johnno I remember that pub you imagined. Whcih of the Red Bell's ends were you sat in?

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  • 295. At 5:33pm on 31 Aug 2009, U14029869 wrote:

    291. At 5:23pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    Looks like you missed out on the deliberate and I thought quite smart use of the double negative in that comment. Tsk. I do try and appeal to you Tefal-heads but...

    ---------------------------------------------------------------

    You see, this is the sort of thing I was referring to. Am I supposed to believe this is "robbo robson" replying to me here? I'd imagine everyone who reads anywhere above a third grade level gets the fact that you're not some 40-70 (seriously your age is all over the place in these blogs) year old guy from the North-East who was once on trial for burglary (seriously, is that really how low you thought you needed to stoop to identify with the average Englishman?)

    Regardless I had to look up what a tefal head was there. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=tefal%20head

    After consulting google

    http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/2549/wlniall.jpg

    I'm pretty sure your forehead is bigger than mine

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  • 296. At 5:36pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    Self-taught mate... Polytechnic of Life...

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  • 297. At 5:40pm on 31 Aug 2009, U14029869 wrote:

    Should have saved that joke for your next blog Niall.

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  • 298. At 5:41pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    That settles it.

    Anyone who did not know what a "Tefal-Head" was has obviously no place conversing with another human being.

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  • 299. At 5:42pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    295
    U14029869
    I'm confused. How could he be replying to you when it was your first post on the blog? Is Robbo telepathic too or do you have multiple user names?

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  • 300. At 5:45pm on 31 Aug 2009, U14029869 wrote:

    299. At 5:42pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    ChuckleBrother2 is also me. Reregistered an account when they reset JesusFChrist but still have the old one with the weird username on a different computer. Thanks for your interest in my life though, much appreciated.

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  • 301. At 5:46pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    So Jesus is really Chuckle and Uwhatever.

    Has anyone let the Pope know?

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  • 302. At 5:46pm on 31 Aug 2009, U14029869 wrote:

    298. At 5:41pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    That settles it.

    Anyone who did not know what a "Tefal-Head" was has obviously no place conversing with another human being.

    ------------------------------------------------------------

    Judging by the amount of time you spend on this blog I'd question whether you've actually ever conversed with another human being in the flesh.

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  • 303. At 5:48pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 304. At 5:49pm on 31 Aug 2009, U14029869 wrote:

    301. At 5:46pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    So Jesus is really Chuckle and Uwhatever.

    Has anyone let the Pope know?

    -------------------------------------------


    He asked me a question you halfwit.

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  • 305. At 5:52pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    Is JDR ChuckleBrother1? Are you twins?

    Complain about this comment

  • 306. At 5:54pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Judging by the amount of time you spend on this blog I'd question whether you've actually ever conversed with another human being in the flesh.

    ---------------------


    Absolutely correct, because there is a serious lack of them here at the minute!

    (Trotter you know I don't mean you, you know I will always love you)

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  • 307. At 5:56pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:



    Can I ask the Holy Trinity one question...


    What do you find funny? Ok so we know you don't think this is but what comedians / comedy shows/writing do you have a chuckle at?

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  • 308. At 5:59pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGC003Xz3CY

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  • 309. At 6:35pm on 31 Aug 2009, Andreisgiant wrote:

    Gary United, you truly are a waste of an existence. You post on this blog EVERY single day, and always with the same recycled rubbish. You seem to feel you have some sort of premium relationship with other posters on here, yet you do not even know anything about their lives. It smacks of desperation

    I find it genuinely bewildering that you do not see the obvious. You post ALL the time, your comments do not get feedback other than from 3 or 4 other hardcore losers on here, and yet you continue to plague this blog with utter tripe. Does it not make you wonder why YOU are the highest poster on this blog? Do you think that is what normal people do? I can assure you, it is not no matter what those internet chatrooms say.

    Finally, Niall seems to be sitting up and paying attention that some of us would like him to change this tired, worn out attempt at humour into something with a little more substance. I hope he will follow through

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  • 310. At 6:40pm on 31 Aug 2009, DenistheGenius wrote:

    wow. things have really regressed here... please, don't make me go back to the Numpty blog, guys!

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  • 311. At 6:45pm on 31 Aug 2009, DenistheGenius wrote:

    in the hopes of halting the handbags in here, an interesting sidebar: you can write numpty, but the profanity alarm goes if you write Phil McN****y.

    thoughts?

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  • 312. At 7:15pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    309 Andre.
    A few questions....

    Why do you care?

    Are you a reincarnation we haven't been made aware of yet?

    If I respond to your posts will I be an even greater hard-core loser?

    What do you think should be done about the diving cheats in football?
    Is there anything anybody can do to help make your visit to Robbo's blog page more enjoyable and therefore your life more fulfilling?

    I personally find alot of what gets posted here hilariously funny (hey, it's just me). The only thing that detracts from my enjoyment of Robbo's blog and the posts that follow, is the crap that spouts forth from you and others like you. Again, why do you care?

    Post your address and we'll start a collection to reimburse your licence fee.

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  • 313. At 7:23pm on 31 Aug 2009, JoeDavisRoach wrote:

    294. At 5:29pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    "Robbo"/Niall

    I can assure you Im not posting from some kind of high ground (although if was Id like to think Ive earned it) - it may just be that its nigh on impossible to stoop any lower than this "Robbo" character you have created.

    Ive noticed that while there are some who clearly disagree with me and dont care for my opinion, there are also many that do see to share my sentiments. I would also question how much people like GazUtd, TrottersUSA etc genuinly care for your blog as it would seem to me they simply just prefer having a place to trade jokes with each other as opposed to actually reading your blog and enjoying it. As I said before thats fine by me.

    Rather than seek to improve your blogs comedy (or even vary it slightly) you seem to be more interested in trading insults with people in the guise of the fictional "Robbo" - in this regard you lose credibility. I dont want to judge you - you may be simply unmotivated from writing endless "Robbo" blogs or you may just be untalented but at least try to disprove the latter by producing something better than this shopworn fodder.

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  • 314. At 7:30pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    yawn

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  • 315. At 7:32pm on 31 Aug 2009, DenistheGenius wrote:

    we should all totally have a scrap after school.
    let's meet at the lower school playground, yes?

    McNumpties!

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  • 316. At 7:40pm on 31 Aug 2009, shinywillie1980 wrote:

    Utter hogwash JDR. I still reckon you and Robbo went for the same job and he out smarted you. probably due to your constant spelling and grammatical mistakes. Listen it is a bit of fun and it is not a waste of taxpayers money as there is no robbo tax and it is not a waste of licence payers money either as any programme shown between 8.00am and 9.00pm on BBC is that.( plus he is a volunteer) Also you and your 'unmerry' band of followers are so damn miserable you can not even see humour if you wanted to, The deliberate grammatical mistake from Robbo was taken seriously by some. This blog is entertainment. Not a piece of investigative journalism so lighten up, and remember not everyone likes the same things.

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  • 317. At 8:10pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    It's best I ignore you JDR. Of course there are people who don't like this blog but they have the good sense to seek enlightenment elsewhere. Whilst you're entitled to your opinion the worry is always that in the light of nothing changing or improving - in your opinion - you keep coming back to say so. As you've given us no indication of the direction you'd like me blog to take - save for 'make it better' which is a mite subjective, son - I doubt I'll be able to satisfy your non-specific needs and therefore it seems senseless to keep logging on in some weird masochistic act of hope. I offer this in the spirit of generosity, that you might save yourself the trouble of worrying for me, my career and the general wellbeing of me and my Blue Bell mates. Good lad.

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  • 318. At 8:18pm on 31 Aug 2009, JoeDavisRoach wrote:

    316. At 7:40pm on 31 Aug 2009, shinywillie1980 wrote:

    Utter hogwash JDR. I still reckon you and Robbo went for the same job and he out smarted you. probably due to your constant spelling and grammatical mistakes.
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    No I have a real job.

    ( plus he is a volunteer).
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Who - Niall? I hope your not suggesting the fictional "Robbo" is some sort of volunteer that the bbc unearthed in back end of "the Blue Bell".

    Also you and your 'unmerry' band of followers are so damn miserable you can not even see humour if you wanted to
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    What humour?

    This blog is entertainment.
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Nothing could be further from the truth


    and remember not everyone likes the same things.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Exactly - so why do we get "Robbo" every few days? If the BBC mst have some sort of comedy blog surely they could ask Niall to vary it.


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  • 319. At 8:19pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Ok, so far on here I have been labelled the following among others;

    1. Gay
    2. Jobless
    3. Abnormal
    4. Desperate
    5. Have no life
    6. Only losers for friends
    7. Talk utter tripe


    Robbo you think you have it bad, at least you're only tired and old!

    Thankfully I have thick skin, it must be from sitting around on my backside all day doing nothing. Although being gay I would have thought I would moisturise more.

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  • 320. At 8:26pm on 31 Aug 2009, JoeDavisRoach wrote:

    317. At 8:10pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    Surely being a writer you must have some sort of creative streak? Im hoping you got this job on some sort of merit and not because you father is high up in the BBC. Im not asking for you to walk on water Niall just produce something that doesnt involve a stereotyped working class northerner's cliched approach to sport. Is that so hard?

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  • 321. At 8:28pm on 31 Aug 2009, shinywillie1980 wrote:

    If you have a look at the bbc sport homepage you will see that there is more than one blog on this site, despite claiming to have a job you do have an awful lot of time on your hands so take time to count them and see how many others that would appeal to you. Also you will notice this blog is situated in the fun and games section. As i pointed out everyone likes different forms of comedy and some don't like comedy at all but the point is that if you are taking this blog as seriously as you suggest then I do agree with mr Gazutd in the fact you need help or at least a reality check.

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  • 322. At 8:35pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    JDR
    How about he does the blog in a stereotypical internet whinger persona?

    For example...

    That goal Arshavin scored at the weekend, wasn't very good was it. Just your usual rubbish shot from outside the box. I mean he could have tried something new couldn't he.
    And another thing, why are we persisting with this football lark? I mean it's been around for over a 100 years now, surely there must be something more exciting and some people more talented.
    How did those footballers ever get their jobs anyway?
    etc etc etc etc

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  • 323. At 8:37pm on 31 Aug 2009, JoeDavisRoach wrote:

    321. At 8:28pm on 31 Aug 2009, shinywillie1980 wrote:

    This blog appears in the sports blog section. Im well aware that there are other blogs on the BBC and I read them often. Some writers are good, some hit and miss and some not so good but "Robbo" is the only one that puts out this kind of tired outlook on sport every few days. There isnt actually a wealth of comedy sports blogs on the BBC so in that regard the choice is limited. And as I said before, if there is only going to be one comedy sports blog why cant Niall try mixing it up a bit. 700 Robbo blogs a year is well past overkill.

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  • 324. At 8:39pm on 31 Aug 2009, Andreisgiant wrote:

    Robbo you think you have it bad, at least you're only tired and old!
    ----------------------------------

    You do realise Robbo doesn't exist so by replying,and directing said reply to Robbo, you are talking to a figment of Niall's imagination.

    I recognise you were trying to be comical with the latter part of your post, however yet again you fail to impress.

    Allow me to sum up your posts
    1. Occassional point about the blog itself
    2. Talking to your 'mates' about nothing that concerns the rest of us and therefore inappropriate on a blog viewed by thousands
    3. Sarcastically retorting a post in an attempt to deflect the abuse levelled at you
    4. Jumping to your icon Robbo's aid
    5. Attempting to play the 'typical Irish lad' with constant references to 'how things are done in Irl' etc.

    I, and no doubt countless others don't mind reading your opinion, for instance in this blog, on diving. It is just as valid as any one elses and I take absolutely no issue with this. What does get incredibly tiresome is having to read through your chummy posts, you weak sarcasm and your defense of your God, Robbo.

    If you are considering replying with some sarcastic post, please stop for a second. This isn't a battle I'm having with you, I would simply ask you to keep your drivel to yourself. If you wish to have 1-1 conversations with others, please feel free to do so, but please keep it away from here so I, and others, don't have to read it.

    Whatever issues I have with Niall's blog, your obsessive and fanatical posts are incredibly irritating. Please stop

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  • 325. At 8:43pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    Robbo...you do 700 blogs a year? Where can I get access to the rest of them? There's less than 100 listed below for the last 12 months.

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  • 326. At 8:45pm on 31 Aug 2009, Andreisgiant wrote:

    Even as I was writing my post, Gary you came back with your same old sarcastic response. Annoyingly predictable

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  • 327. At 8:49pm on 31 Aug 2009, JoeDavisRoach wrote:

    325. At 8:43pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:
    Robbo...you do 700 blogs a year? Where can I get access to the rest of them? There's less than 100 listed below for the last 12 months.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    I see the sarcasm was lost on you

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  • 328. At 8:49pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    By the way Gaz, how's the weather?

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  • 329. At 8:53pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    Ok Andreisgiant you don't want me to reply I know, obviously we couldn't have someone questioning your all knowing wisdom could we?

    But do you know what, you've taken it too far and I am going to answer your idiotic post. Of course you don't think it's idiotic but trust me, it is.

    Now here goes, I'll try to keep it as simple as possible for someone of your obvious failings to understand (and that's not sarcasm):


    ----
    You do realise Robbo doesn't exist so by replying,and directing said reply to Robbo, you are talking to a figment of Niall's imagination.

    Yes you complete fool. EVERYONE here realises Robbo is a character of this blog. Only you and JDR seem to think you are in on the game. How stupid do you really think people are?
    GazUtd suprisingly isn't a real person either, nor do I think is Andreisgiant unless you have risen from the dead.
    ----

    ----
    I recognise you were trying to be comical with the latter part of your post, however yet again you fail to impress.

    Fail to impress you.
    Impress others.
    What should I do? Does your opinion outweigh everyone elses? In your head I have no doubt it does.
    ----

    ----

    Allow me to sum up your posts
    1. Occassional point about the blog itself

    Perfectly acceptable


    2. Talking to your 'mates' about nothing that concerns the rest of us and therefore inappropriate on a blog viewed by thousands

    Says you. Are you the lawmaker? Amazing if there are thousands read it how only you and your ilk have a problem with it.


    3. Sarcastically retorting a post in an attempt to deflect the abuse levelled at you

    Because most of your idiotic insults don't even deserve a reply. If I met someone like you in the pub I'd laugh at you and walk away.


    4. Jumping to your icon Robbo's aid

    In case you are unaware Robbo and I have had our differences in the past, big differences. I would jump to anyones aid when a troublemaker is making fun of them for no reason other than to cause trouble.


    5. Attempting to play the 'typical Irish lad' with constant references to 'how things are done in Irl' etc.

    Surprisingly I am Irish. How dare I make references to Ireland. Better never say anything in my life again about where I come from, how I behave etc etc.
    ------


    I, and no doubt countless others don't mind reading your opinion, for instance in this blog, on diving. It is just as valid as any one elses and I take absolutely no issue with this. What does get incredibly tiresome is having to read through your chummy posts, you weak sarcasm and your defense of your God, Robbo.


    I don't believe in God. And do you know what YOU DO NOT HAVE TO READ ANY OF MY POSTS, it says at the top of every single post who has written it, do you know what you can do? Scroll past it.
    ----


    If you are considering replying with some sarcastic post, please stop for a second. This isn't a battle I'm having with you, I would simply ask you to keep your drivel to yourself. If you wish to have 1-1 conversations with others, please feel free to do so, but please keep it away from here so I, and others, don't have to read it.


    The classic plea of the bully. "I have won and you are not allowed to reply". You may notice Andre that I NEVER complain about any of the abuse directed at me here. Do you know why? Because I happen to think it is funny to see people like you make fools of themselves.
    -----

    Whatever issues I have with Niall's blog, your obsessive and fanatical posts are incredibly irritating. Please stop


    In a word - NO. I'll keep posting. Tough.

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  • 330. At 8:57pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:

    TROTTERUSA

    By the way Gaz, how's the weather?

    ----


    It's rubbish Trotter, raining as usual. It does that a lot in Ireland. You did know I was Irish right?

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  • 331. At 9:00pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    326
    Andre. The last post that Gaz wrote was in reply to JDR so is this Andre your new pseudenom? Can't you stick with one, you'd be far less confused and it'd be a sight easier for the rest of us too if we only had one name to ignore instead of the four we know about to date.

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  • 332. At 9:04pm on 31 Aug 2009, mrshake-speare wrote:

    Complain about this comment

  • 333. At 9:05pm on 31 Aug 2009, shinywillie1980 wrote:

    Can we appeal to the BBC and ask for a new section on the complaints area. for example we want to complain about this comment because it is posted by a certain loser ... or user.
    Also has this blog acheived the most comments yet? does anyone down here remember what it was all about something to do with that game called football if memory recalls...

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  • 334. At 9:08pm on 31 Aug 2009, mrshake-speare wrote:

    She should have died hereafter;
    There would have been a time for such a word.
    To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
    Creeps in this petty pace from day to day
    To the last syllable of recorded time,
    And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
    The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
    Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
    That struts and frets his hour in the penalty area
    And tumbles over
    And then is heard no more: it is a tale
    Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
    Signifying nothing.

    Enter a Messenger

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  • 335. At 9:08pm on 31 Aug 2009, JoeDavisRoach wrote:

    331. At 9:00pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:
    326
    Andre. The last post that Gaz wrote was in reply to JDR so is this Andre your new pseudenom? Can't you stick with one, you'd be far less confused and it'd be a sight easier for the rest of us too if we only had one name to ignore instead of the four we know about to date.
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    TrotterUSA - I have only one username. I dont really have any issue with GazUtd - yes he seems to post on this blog from morning til night and yes he seems to not care for my opinion but that doesnt really concern me. My issues are with Niall and the contents, style and substance of his bi/tri weekly blogs.

    Yourself and GazUtd can discuss the weather all day - I can assure you it doesnt concern me.

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  • 336. At 9:08pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    What? You're Irish? Do you get all 700 of Robbo's annual blogs over there? Give you somat to do indoors while it's raining! He just did one entitled "Diving Me Crazy". Inspired by Carly playin' an old Shakin' Stevens number on the Blue Bell juke box. Good it was too. Some don't like it but borucs to them eh!

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  • 337. At 9:12pm on 31 Aug 2009, GazUtd wrote:


    No Trotter I don't get all 700 and I can assure you that as I spend 27 hours a day here (us jobless get an extra 3 from the government) that I would know about them if they existed.

    Did this diving blog make any reference to Greg Luganis? Remember that, it was funny, people hitting their head is always funny, I think it's happened to a lot of people here.

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  • 338. At 9:21pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    JDR, I'm sorry, I was confusing you with the three headed monster; Chuckle, PMS and Jesus.

    Yes, I remember that. He now works for Real Madrid as a diving coach.

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  • 339. At 9:36pm on 31 Aug 2009, PaulMcShane wrote:

    282. At 5:13pm on 31 Aug 2009, you wrote:
    It's Robbo and mate the point surely is that despite the criticism, constructive or otherwise, there has been no change to the style and substance of this blog because what JDR and some others write don't make a ha'porth worth of difference.
    __________________________________________________________________

    So essentially what your saying Robbo (sure I'll play along) is that you're going to ignore any negative feedback directed at you. It strikes me as a bit stubborn. And you can't say it’s just JDR on some crazed mission to get you because several other posters are making similar comments.

    While you and some of your followers might think the blog is entertaining now, you must admit at some point it will become overly repetitive and completely stale. Personally I think that point has already passed. Nonetheless the question still remains how are you going to address this issue? Do you honestly believe come the start of 2010 season we'll be debating the merits of Robbo’s premiership predictions? Where Robbo is that same stereotypical working class northerner who resides in the Blue Bell. I find that very fanciful.

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  • 340. At 9:41pm on 31 Aug 2009, shinywillie1980 wrote:

    No 339-I bet you will still be whingeing come 2010. not so fanciful!

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  • 341. At 9:44pm on 31 Aug 2009, PaulMcShane wrote:

    FYI Trotter this is my only account. Is it too hard to believe several people expressing their frustration at the garbage routinely spewed by a one Derek Robson?

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  • 342. At 10:07pm on 31 Aug 2009, TrotterUSA wrote:

    PMS, my aplogies to you as well. I think I've got it straight this time. Chuckle, U140 and Jesus are all the same bloke. I'll make a note of it but it would be easier if none of them showed up. When one of you whining JDR groupies uses three names to pad the number of complaints it certainly helps the cause eh! Perhaps you could have a word?

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  • 343. At 10:22pm on 31 Aug 2009, schnickelbop wrote:

    I can't believe the vitriol I'm reading in these posts. Some of you people really need to get laid or smoke a joint or do something to take the edge off. Why you continue to read blogs you don't enjoy eludes me. As for choosing to spend large swaths of time criticising a person you don't know on his writing skills, well I don't think I'll ever understand that.

    No doubt I'll predictably be receiving one of your 'stinging' and gleefully malevolent ripostes on subject of my intelligence for this post...

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  • 344. At 10:26pm on 31 Aug 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    Nothing more to add. Necks in lads, new blog tomorrow. No probs if you don't get back to me on it, mind.

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  • 345. At 10:46pm on 31 Aug 2009, CaesarWasAnIrishman wrote:

    Looking forward to the new blog already Robbo. Although saying such things will likely get me labelled on here as some sort of egotistical brown-noser.

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  • 346. At 11:26pm on 31 Aug 2009, Zootmac wrote:

    334: mrshake-speare

    Now that IS funny.

    Zootmacbeth

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  • 347. At 11:43pm on 31 Aug 2009, goldstone79 wrote:

    Honestly JDR... all this harping on about standards and rarely a post from you that's not littered with all sorts of grammatical errors! Go and learn the difference between "your" and "you're", and "there" and "their", invest in a dictionary and PLEASE read back your comments before posting them!

    Poor old Robbo (or Niall - whatever) - I imagine he feels like Heston Blumenthal being lectured by Ronald McDonald!

    Notwithstanding the comments, I look forward to your next blog Robbo (if that IS your real name!).

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  • 348. At 11:50pm on 31 Aug 2009, Auqakuh wrote:

    Robbo said: "Anyway Johnno I remember that pub you imagined. Whcih of the Red Bell's ends were you sat in?"

    I'm sure this'll get moderated, but I totally read that as "which of the Red Bell ends were you sat in?"

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  • 349. At 3:33pm on 01 Sep 2009, Gunishment wrote:

    I don't think the issue is with the dive for us Gooner fans, but on the consistency of decisions. Like Wenger says, if Eduardo's supposed dive is to be punished, then the UEFA have a job on their hands on looking at every possible case of diving.

    Why now? It was not a game changer.

    Case in point, McGeady's dive yesterday, although he was sent off, was not punished for 2 games. How is that balanced? If they're going to introduce this type of rule, then it should be dished out evenly regardless of team or player.

    There is also the persuasive argument that some players do try and avoid being fouled but end up losing their balance. Would this be considered a foul?

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  • 350. At 10:26pm on 01 Sep 2009, Robbo Robson wrote:

    348. At 11:50pm on 31 Aug 2009, Auqakuh wrote:
    Robbo said: "Anyway Johnno I remember that pub you imagined. Whcih of the Red Bell's ends were you sat in?"

    I'm sure this'll get moderated, but I totally read that as "which of the Red Bell ends were you sat in?"

    _________________________________________________________________________

    Shocked! It's like you were insuating that how you read it was how you were MEANT to read it. Eeeeeeeeeeeeee! Well I never.

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  • 351. At 03:30am on 02 Sep 2009, love5580 wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 352. At 3:25pm on 02 Sep 2009, fibok60 wrote:

    If there were more honestly from the football managers, then diving or cheating of any sorts would diminish. Rather like good parenting, a strong manager who acts from honesty, reason and compassion would circumvent the need for outside bodies to intervene and punish badly behaving players.

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  • 353. At 5:26pm on 02 Sep 2009, ControlledMagic wrote:

    E Gad! Go on hoiday for two weeeks and miss out on the blog-rant of the season....and that's only two weeks old! Still, kept me busy between cups of tea today.

    For the record, I enjoyed it and would like to point out that I perfectly understood the 'Boruc' joke. It's not just that I am, also, a comic genius, but because I happen to work with a dyed-in-the-wool Tim (Celtic fan, apparently) who, at the beginning of LAST season, declared that Boruc was 'the best keeper in the world'. Not only that, he did it with a straight face. My response to the rest of the office, when they overheard and asked 'who?', was "I think that was Utter B***ocks".

    See? Genius. I told you.

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  • 354. At 5:36pm on 02 Sep 2009, blueolaf wrote:

    This is a disgrace from UEFA. Retrospective punishments are not feasible given the number of games this applies to. In the interests of fairness are all controversial incidents going to get the same treatment?

    This also undermines the authority and integrity of the referee.

    Celtic were not going to win that game regardless of the penalty. Their incessant complaints makes them a poor sporting club and bad losers.

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  • 355. At 5:56pm on 02 Sep 2009, CanScotSteve wrote:

    Airdrie supporter.
    Rooney loses control of the ball and then falls over the Arsenal keeper. Rooney does not try to control the ball and beat the keeper. Does it matter whether he has control at the time of the contact?
    Why are defenders allowed to shield the ball over the goal line by obstructing the forward for yards? If the forward tries to retrieve the ball he gets penalized. This makes an interesting attacking situation into dull defense.

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  • 356. At 7:17pm on 02 Sep 2009, ControlledMagic wrote:

    Hey! Why has my 353 been referred Robbo? I was no more explicit that your own joke...Artur Boruc equating to Utter B*****ks. I hope your Mods aren't taking on Platini-esque inconsistencies.

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