« Previous | Main | Next »

The Beach

Post categories:

Eddie Mair | 05:34 UK time, Friday, 30 April 2010

beach2.JPG

Comments

  • 1. At 07:16am on 30 Apr 2010, Mindclearly wrote:

    I feel that there are rains coming we had it so nice all week, weatherwise, and the day I hit the beach it goes all April on me!! 'Showers'

    Complain about this comment

  • 2. At 07:27am on 30 Apr 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    *shouts* MindClearly ... you're on the wrong beach!!
    Put away that brolly and come over here :o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 3. At 08:52am on 30 Apr 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    (Yawn) Anything new happen last night?

    Thought not. Where's the coffee?

    Complain about this comment

  • 4. At 08:57am on 30 Apr 2010, annasee wrote:

    I've just had a quick tidy up along the beach, & removed a lot of electioneering posters & billboards that someone seems to have littered the place with. We don't want any nonsense like that here, do we? Thought not. I've put them all in a big pile and I thought maybe tonight we could have a bonfire, toast some marshmallows etc. See y'all later!

    Complain about this comment

  • 5. At 09:06am on 30 Apr 2010, gossipmistress wrote:

    Oh no, I'm going to miss the bonfire! I may be out of contact for 48hrs...top secret mission to frighten the residents of Gloucestershire with strange music and dancing. Good work though Annasee!

    Complain about this comment

  • 6. At 09:48am on 30 Apr 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    Freshly squeezed orange juice on the bar.

    Perhaps I could add these podiums to the bonfire, Annasee? I see the 'leaders' tried to muscle in here last night and we can't have any politicking here, can we?

    Complain about this comment

  • 7. At 10:35am on 30 Apr 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Has anyone seen the vintage telly I was trying to fix last night? I want to get it rigged for digital ...
    ...
    ...
    ...
    Oh ...
    ...
    ...
    Annasee has tidied it up!
    ...
    ...
    Probably for the best.

    I'll have a cup of tea and a choccy biccy instead.

    Complain about this comment

  • 8. At 11:05am on 30 Apr 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    6. Big Sister
    "Perhaps I could add these podiums to the bonfire, Annasee?"

    Chipboard doesn't burn very well, and stinks.

    ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 9. At 11:07am on 30 Apr 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    Don't worry, Big Jim, they are solid pine - as in, pining for an audience.

    Complain about this comment

  • 10. At 11:08am on 30 Apr 2010, Mindclearly wrote:

    Are sure they're not Beachwood now!!

    Complain about this comment

  • 11. At 11:10am on 30 Apr 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    Enough for three Pine boxes?

    Complain about this comment

  • 12. At 11:10am on 30 Apr 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    No, Big Jim, no use for that. They're riddled with holes.

    Complain about this comment

  • 13. At 11:19am on 30 Apr 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    All the better to let the worms in, then.

    Complain about this comment

  • 14. At 11:29am on 30 Apr 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    Nah, the holes are too big. Then there's the rot ...

    Complain about this comment

  • 15. At 11:37am on 30 Apr 2010, Mindclearly wrote:

    you both sound like your by a nice parish church, not on a beach, salty worms?? plus and 6 ft holes will need suring up as the sand will collapse if your not careful....

    Complain about this comment

  • 16. At 11:52am on 30 Apr 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    14. Big Sister
    "Then there's the rot .."

    Recycling, you mean. It's all part of [insert Diety of choice]'s plan...

    Complain about this comment

  • 17. At 11:59am on 30 Apr 2010, DiY wrote:

    Good Day peeps of The Beach!

    To celebrate midday I have placed a large tray of bacon geralds on the bar at NC's, please help yourselves and there is a fine selection of sauces and pickles to go with them.

    Complain about this comment

  • 18. At 12:46pm on 30 Apr 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    Dry Cured Bacon Gerald for me. With Sprout Relish

    Complain about this comment

  • 19. At 12:48pm on 30 Apr 2010, DiY wrote:

    I too relish Sprouts!

    Complain about this comment

  • 20. At 1:33pm on 30 Apr 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    P_Nutt are there any bacon-free geralds? Since that bit on 'The Archers' about slaughtering calves new born to milking mothers in the dairy, I've become vegetarian. Thought it might happen - rather puts you off going to the butchers when you drive past fields of frolicking lambs.

    I've brought along a selection of salads and meat free alternatives by way of contribution - shall we dine al fresco this lunchtime? Is it too early for a vino collapso?

    Complain about this comment

  • 21. At 1:37pm on 30 Apr 2010, DiY wrote:

    Me Lady, al fresco is fine by me. I have also brought along some boiled sprouts.

    Well I say 'boiled' but they have only been simmering since January the 3rd so may still be a bit hard in the centre, but what the heck a little daring never hurt anybody did it?

    Shall I open the wine?

    ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 22. At 1:57pm on 30 Apr 2010, davmcn wrote:

    No meat, no come.

    Complain about this comment

  • 23. At 2:13pm on 30 Apr 2010, mittfh wrote:

    "Anything new happen last night?"

    Three blokes having an argument on live TV, but the post-match analysis was apparently the same as the previous two. So nothing new there, then.

    I also heard something about 22 other blokes kicking a spherical object around a field, the outcome of which was apparently less predictable.

    Meanwhile today the sun (the yellow disc in the sky, not the waste of paper) appears to have gone AWOL until Monday.

    Hey ho, such is life...

    Complain about this comment

  • 24. At 2:31pm on 30 Apr 2010, richardelston wrote:

    In the debate on immigration last night was there any mention on the Gurkhas and Joanna Lumley? Where does she and all her efforts fit into this?

    I note the BNP are proposing to close the door to all potential immigrants, however would the Gurkhas who fought for us be in this category?

    Complain about this comment

  • 25. At 2:45pm on 30 Apr 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    Is that wine open yet? I am Parched. Who spotted the spittoon on the picture behind Sequin on the caption competition piccy? My wit could not work out a punch line though.

    Complain about this comment

  • 26. At 2:47pm on 30 Apr 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    23 - Well, mittfh, on my stretch of beach, it's absolutely fan-blooming-tastic! Sun, surf and HEY ... is that my old mate Al Fresco?

    Tremendous! Labrusco, cheap and fizzy anybody?

    Complain about this comment

  • 27. At 2:51pm on 30 Apr 2010, DiY wrote:

    mittfh 23, crackin weather here Gromit!

    Complain about this comment

  • 28. At 4:23pm on 30 Apr 2010, Gillianian wrote:

    I missed my tea at three, and didn't get any more at four :o(

    Ellis (26) I always do fizzy, but never do cheap or sweet! I'll stick to a pot of builders - and I'll have a chocolate éclair with it. Help yourselves!

    Complain about this comment

  • 29. At 4:35pm on 30 Apr 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Ah ha, well Gillian, I have something very special held back for you!

    Actually I have a whol case, because ALL froggers deserve some Italian brmmm brmm ...

    Complain about this comment

  • 30. At 4:48pm on 30 Apr 2010, davmcn wrote:

    Leftover pheasant (free range) tonight in a white sauce over tangled telly. Look out for shot, however. Californian rose with.

    Complain about this comment

  • 31. At 5:27pm on 30 Apr 2010, davmcn wrote:

    Instead of becoming a veggie, I'd stop listening to the Archers. Not that I do listen to it.

    Complain about this comment

  • 32. At 6:01pm on 30 Apr 2010, DiY wrote:

    Ellis P Otter 29, crikey champers by Ferrari!

    Is that wot they serve with 'fast food'?

    davmcn 30, nice! I have a freezer with several left over from last season but nobody seems to want them!

    Anyhoo, grilled Pork chops and roasted veg for me and Mrs Nutt tonight. Followed by her special hand crafted rhubarb crumble for pudding.

    Complain about this comment

  • 33. At 6:20pm on 30 Apr 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    Ferrari is just Smith in Italian....

    Complain about this comment

  • 34. At 6:30pm on 30 Apr 2010, DiY wrote:

    Thanks BJ!

    Complain about this comment

  • 35. At 6:49pm on 30 Apr 2010, Gillianian wrote:

    Thank you Ellis - life-enhancing indeed ;o)
    I won't spoil it by having it with my chicken coriander - I'll wait til I can savour it, later.

    P_Nutt (32) - You could lob a brace in my direction, but only if they're oven-ready. My Nan did her best to teach me, but I never took to cleaning out dead beasts - the nearest I came was plucking feathers off the fowl.

    Complain about this comment

  • 36. At 6:52pm on 30 Apr 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    Thought for today:

    • "I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die."

    Complain about this comment

  • 37. At 6:58pm on 30 Apr 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    35 Gillianian
    The trick is to kill it first.

    Complain about this comment

  • 38. At 7:04pm on 30 Apr 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    ... but then on re-reading your post I see you were talking about dead beasts which renders my attempt at a joke a bit lame and useless.
    You'll find me hiding in my sandcastle.

    Complain about this comment

  • 39. At 7:19pm on 30 Apr 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    lucien - why did you not join the Tiller girl's party? I thought you might enjoy that. And ... little hint ... if you are going to hide, don't tell us where ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 40. At 7:21pm on 30 Apr 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    We could always have another Tiller girls party, Ellis - I'm game!

    Complain about this comment

  • 41. At 7:25pm on 30 Apr 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    40 BigSis
    Dont't say that! Gillianian will come along to pluck you!

    Complain about this comment

  • 42. At 7:41pm on 30 Apr 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    BTW - don't forget the secret beach, only a hundred and twenty nine posts till page four. Can it be done?

    Complain about this comment

  • 43. At 7:45pm on 30 Apr 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    42 Ellis P Otter
    If you tell everyone it's there then it's not a secret ;o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 44. At 7:46pm on 30 Apr 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Stupid me, I meant history beach that's hard to find!

    Complain about this comment

  • 45. At 7:52pm on 30 Apr 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Just how much powdered ginger do you need to make an equivalent of an inch of the real thing? GRRRR!

    There's going to be hell in this kitchen later ... no not later ... NOW!!

    Complain about this comment

  • 46. At 8:34pm on 30 Apr 2010, DiY wrote:

    Gillianianianianian, oi will gladly give you one, oi will let you know when, but it should be in the next couple of weaks!
    Will be in touch.

    Mr Peter Nutt.
    ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 47. At 8:36pm on 30 Apr 2010, DiY wrote:

    Ellis....calm down, take deep breaths and then deep quaffs of this vintage Scrumpy!

    Complain about this comment

  • 48. At 8:42pm on 30 Apr 2010, Gillianian wrote:

    Big Sister - pay no heed to Lucien. I know you're game for a laugh, and also very plucky. I wouldn't dream of even ruffling your feathers. ;o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 49. At 9:15pm on 30 Apr 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    A quarter of a pot, it turns out. Plus extra Worcestershire sauce to calm the sweetness.

    But, darned fine result.

    Tantrums work

    Complain about this comment

  • 50. At 10:00pm on 30 Apr 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Cracking play tonight ... a gazillion times better than last night's drama

    Complain about this comment

  • 51. At 11:39pm on 30 Apr 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    Sings

    *I'm not a pheasant plucker,
    I'm a pheasant plucker's son,
    and I'm only plucking pheasants
    til the pheasant plucker comes.*


    Tra la la la la

    Complain about this comment

  • 52. At 08:15am on 01 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Morning Peeps, Froggers, Peeps-a-Frogging and Frogging Peeps!

    Bit damp in RL so I think a day on The Beach is called for.

    But before we start frolicking in the surf and taking part in general Beach silliness how about a full English fry up, seen' as it is Saturday 'n all!

    Complain about this comment

  • 53. At 09:03am on 01 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    I am going on a mouse hunt!

    Mrs Nutt was complaining that our cat was clawing at the bedroom door last night even though I knew Rosie (cat) was outside. Upon investigating this morning there is a small pile of wood / paint chips on the floor at the bottom of the door frame!

    Needless to say Mrs Nutt is horrified and I have been given clear instructions that the 'rodent' must be caught and she wants proof of it's demise!

    Complain about this comment

  • 54. At 09:11am on 01 May 2010, annasee wrote:

    Oh I do hope it wasn't a RAT Mr Nutt!. That would be even worse...

    Complain about this comment

  • 55. At 09:22am on 01 May 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    Don't tell me... you are going to put it onto skewers and have 'rat on a stick' with satay sauce at the barbie this arvo?

    Complain about this comment

  • 56. At 09:23am on 01 May 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    54. annasee

    • "Oh I do hope it wasn't a RAT Mr Nutt!."
    The best thing about mice is that their presence indicates an absence of rats...

    Complain about this comment

  • 57. At 09:27am on 01 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    PN 32, I buy them at the farmers' market in St Albans and have several more in the freezer.

    Complain about this comment

  • 58. At 09:39am on 01 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    PN 53, Maybe it was a wasp taking bits of wood to build a nest.

    Complain about this comment

  • 59. At 09:40am on 01 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    Got a gallon of redcurrant wine on the go.

    Complain about this comment

  • 60. At 10:02am on 01 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    57 dav
    Mice?

    Complain about this comment

  • 61. At 11:00am on 01 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    I hope not annasee, but our cat brings home all sorts of wildlife for us to admire!
    From baby rabbits to field mice we have had them all.

    She even brought us back a red legged partridge (fresh road kill) last week!

    Anyhoo I have bought a couple of humane mouse traps so with a bit of luck and a fair wind I may have a result in the morning!

    Dave 57, all mine fell out of the sky after being hit by Eley 'lead' free No. 8 shot.

    Complain about this comment

  • 62. At 11:27am on 01 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    ld 60, No, rats. Mice are too small to bother with. Ever try to skin one?

    PN 61, The next time they are in the market, I'll ask if they have been shot (not that I really care). We bring home roadkill and pluck it. Skin it, if it's a rabbit.

    Complain about this comment

  • 63. At 11:53am on 01 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    PN 61, Fafrotskis, eh?

    Complain about this comment

  • 64. At 11:56am on 01 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    Big Sis, You beat me to the Pheasant Plucker ditty.

    Mr Nutt I have a small snappy thing that'll teach that mouse a lesson.

    Or how's about using that .22 of yours and a good telescopic sight?

    Complain about this comment

  • 65. At 12:06pm on 01 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Stewart_M 64.

    Call me Mr Silly but I want to catch and release the little fellow alive!

    Besides Mr .22 is reserved for things I can shoot and then eat, likewise Mr 12 bore.

    Not only that, but the discharge of said firearms within Sprout Towers will bring down the wrath of Mrs Nutt upon my cranium!

    :-p

    Complain about this comment

  • 66. At 12:08pm on 01 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    ...and you can pack that in for starters!

    Complain about this comment

  • 67. At 1:12pm on 01 May 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    61. P Nutt

    • "Anyhoo I have bought a couple of humane mouse traps so with a bit of luck and a fair wind I may have a result in the morning!"


    And, having 'humanely' caught the wee scamp, what will you humanely do with it, I wonder...drive (or bike) it across town and release it?

    Complain about this comment

  • 68. At 1:59pm on 01 May 2010, SirStarryKnight wrote:

    Years ago, we had a thriving population of about a dozen in the attic. I used to hand-feed them dry porridge oats each evening. But when they become too numerous I used a humane trap, and then I'd turn them loose in the greenhouse at the end of the garden. I couldn't have coped with rats, though.

    Complain about this comment

  • 69. At 2:22pm on 01 May 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    My son had a 'humane' trap of the tilting sort - a small black plastic box which tips under the mouse's weight and thus closes the entry behind the wee, sleekit timorous beastie.

    Unfortunately, left un-checked for a few hours in the sun on his treehouse, it yielded a slow-cooked dead mousie.

    ;-(

    • "I'm truly sorry man's dominion,
      Has broken nature's social union,
      An' justifies that ill opinion,
      Which makes thee startle
      At me, thy poor, earth-born companion,
      An' fellow-mortal!
      ............
      Still thou art blest, compar'd wi' me
      The present only toucheth thee:
      But, Och! I backward cast my e'e.
      On prospects drear!
      An' forward, tho' I canna see,
      I guess an' fear!"

      Robert Burns, R.I.P. (To a Mouse)

    Complain about this comment

  • 70. At 3:31pm on 01 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Big Jim I will return the wee thing back to the hedgerow at the bottom of the garden from where it most likely came from in the first place. Such things make the world go round!

    Thanks for the Burns BTW.

    P Nutt

    Complain about this comment

  • 71. At 4:30pm on 01 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    PN 61, Now that I think about it, I believe it is spelled fafrotskies.

    Complain about this comment

  • 72. At 6:19pm on 01 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    I had a mouse once, in Zambia that used to chomp my potatoes at night. Though I often saw it I could never catch it, till one night I had the privilege of seeing an owl swoop down and grab it just as it emerged from my cabling conduit out to the geyser.

    It was as impressive to me as any lion kill, mainly as it happened only about two metres away from me, there in my underpants clutching my home made shillelagh.

    Oh Zoiks, too much information again ...

    Complain about this comment

  • 73. At 6:42pm on 01 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    there in my underpants clutching my home made shillelagh.LOL...well that is a novel name for it but it!

    Complain about this comment

  • 74. At 6:48pm on 01 May 2010, Alan_N wrote:

    72 - EPO - That conjures up some unpleasant images...

    61 - PNutt - We had a cat that would bring back all manner of wildlife, but being a socialist cat that believed in equitable distribution, she only ever left us the back end. She also used to sit on the windowsill for hours on end staring at the cows in the field next door. You could just tell that she was trying to figure out how she was going to get it through the cat flap.

    Complain about this comment

  • 75. At 7:33pm on 01 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Hmm, this is clearly not the place to tell of my adventures with snakes.

    Is Doc Who on iPlayer yet?

    Complain about this comment

  • 76. At 7:35pm on 01 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    75 Ellis
    Buy a TV license!

    Complain about this comment

  • 77. At 7:39pm on 01 May 2010, GotToTheEnd wrote:

    In to the amazing Manchester Town Hall, a gothic palace.

    Ford Maddox Brown murals.

    Cordoba Mosque arches in that green and red, to counterweigh the gothic.

    And the ceilings soaring. As magnificent as any cathedrals, and far outgunning the sad Oxbridge College 19th Century rebuilds they fob tourists, undergraduates and their parents off with.


    The local authority with real power.

    Complain about this comment

  • 78. At 8:18pm on 01 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    My favourite example of municipal architecture is the twinned domed Florida state capitol building in Tallahassee.

    Complain about this comment

  • 79. At 8:31pm on 01 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Rodent Update

    Yon wee mouse is in the lounge as testfied by the screams from Mrs Nutt!

    :-)

    But no sign of the elusive rodent by the time I get in there. So I have now placed four humane traps around said room.

    :-(

    Will keep you updated!

    Complain about this comment

  • 80. At 8:33pm on 01 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    BTW..Mrs Nutt said it was huge!

    memo...Mrs Nutt needs new spectacles!

    Complain about this comment

  • 81. At 8:45pm on 01 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    76 lucien why? I can pause replay and pop out for a break or a ciggie with the player. And being as there is only one programme a week on the flashing box I want to see out of the multiplicude. I'm on a good thing.

    And if this Doctor goes where I think he may be going ... well that'll be that ...

    Complain about this comment

  • 82. At 8:50pm on 01 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    I can source mrs nutt a good magnifier from what I hear its necessary. If she thinks is Hugh then she definately needs new spectacles.

    Complain about this comment

  • 83. At 8:55pm on 01 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    81 Ellis
    Where do you think he's going?

    Complain about this comment

  • 84. At 9:21pm on 01 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Somewhere like this I guess http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ggsjwWwesI8

    Complain about this comment

  • 85. At 9:24pm on 01 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    Another Doctor Who trailer?

    Complain about this comment

  • 86. At 9:51pm on 01 May 2010, GotToTheEnd wrote:

    I was on my way back West after my North Sea swim. Somewhat shorter than my marathon in Cardigan Bay the week before - about a dozen lengths equivalent (I count strokes). But that was after an 11 mile snails pace jog. I don't know what that distance would do to a snail but as I slugged it out with sore feet, short breath and aching limbs I began to see death by crow, dropped from 50 feet, as some sort of relief.

    Cos I was in full heat loss mode when I went in, my hands felt so painfully cold, it was as if I had a dagger stuck in each palm.


    Is Florida warmer this time of the year? It surely is a geriatric jogging centre, so I'd be right at home there.

    Complain about this comment

  • 87. At 10:06pm on 01 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    86 EtE
    You should take a nice hot bath, tuck yourself up in bed and be careful not to overdo it next time. :o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 88. At 07:58am on 02 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    Morning all. coffee on. Tea brewing. Real, builders and herbal/ fruity. Cross aunts and bacon geralds are in the capable hands of mr nutt. ( well I hope so)

    Complain about this comment

  • 89. At 09:03am on 02 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Result P Nutt 1 - Field mouse - 0! Got woken at 5am by the loud click of the door of the trap shutting. Ten minutes later Mr Mouse is back in the hedgerow!

    To celebrate, cross aunts and bacon geralds all round.

    Complain about this comment

  • 90. At 09:08am on 02 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    89 P_nutt

    You have to take them at least half a mile away or they come back!

    Complain about this comment

  • 91. At 09:27am on 02 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    I agree lucien but I live in a very rural location so there is not much point really.

    :-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 92. At 09:51am on 02 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    PN 79, You should put out a wife trap.

    ld 90, I thought mice were metric.

    Complain about this comment

  • 93. At 09:57am on 02 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    92 dav
    No, they're American.

    Complain about this comment

  • 94. At 10:05am on 02 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    The American grey mice killed off the native red variety years ago.

    Complain about this comment

  • 95. At 11:24am on 02 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    Well my trap had a visitor this morning. Afraid my trap is permanent. No risk of this mouse returning.

    Time for mid morning refreshments?

    Complain about this comment

  • 96. At 12:10pm on 02 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    ld 93, No, that's grey squirls, as opposed to British red squir-rels.

    Complain about this comment

  • 97. At 12:13pm on 02 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    No, it's colour blind mice.

    Complain about this comment

  • 98. At 1:54pm on 02 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    ld 97, Three color blind mice, three color blind mice
    See how they run, see how....

    Nope, doesn't work.

    Complain about this comment

  • 99. At 1:58pm on 02 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    Blind mice can't scan.

    Complain about this comment

  • 100. At 2:14pm on 02 May 2010, annasee wrote:

    Morning all. Am listening to my next opera on DVD at the moment. However I don't need to watch the DVD as being in the pit, I won't be seeing any of it anyway, so no point in tantalising myself!
    Accidentally heard the church service on R4 this morning (dozing at some points). But I did hear one of the preachers talking about how "the church" (whichever one we're talking about) had to take heed of the voice of God wherever it appeared, & make sure not to get "stuck" in their traditions and status quo, always to move on in the way God directed them. This made me think " What if the voice of God was coming from the Foreign Office?" Hmmm? Why wouldn't He send a memo to the Pope via the Foreign Office, indeed? Seems perfectly possible to me, and rather efficient too. A neat Mission Statement for the Church to aim for over the next few years.
    Anyway, shall get back to opera again now I've shared that moment of inspiration with you all. :-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 101. At 2:44pm on 02 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Rab C makes his political views known

    Complain about this comment

  • 102. At 3:39pm on 02 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    101 - Nice one P_Nutt!

    Just thought I'd pop in to say what a terrific and sunny day it is up here today. Too bright even for our local webcam!

    Note to self:Must remind tugmistress to lose the snow effect!

    Complain about this comment

  • 103. At 5:58pm on 02 May 2010, Gillianian wrote:

    Ellis, it looks more like a sand storm to me. I'll get my yashmak and give it another go.....

    Annasee, I had a holy morning too - went to a Christening - merely as a member of the audience, you understand. The heavens didn't open, nor did the ground swallow me up, so I guess I got away with it this time ;o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 104. At 6:09pm on 02 May 2010, jonnie wrote:

    Accidentally heard the church service on R4 this morning (dozing at some points).

    We should email that to Mark Damazer ... I always make a point to swithch to Radio 5 or the News channel on a Sunday where the papers get reviewed..

    Complain about this comment

  • 105. At 8:03pm on 02 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Good Evening nice Peeps of the Beach.


    Nibbles, snacks and drinkies are available at NC's, including some of me special reserve Cider!

    Complain about this comment

  • 106. At 8:18pm on 02 May 2010, GotToTheEnd wrote:

    87


    In this hotel room? The TV doesn't work. The phone doesn't work. There's no hot water and the bed sags and slopes from the years of exertion of the two backed ones (Other positions available)


    I'd rather be too cold by x degrees than too hot by x degrees so maybe Florida nights aren't for me


    After the feeling you can run for ever wears off, one of the pleasures of jogging is the death and resurrection syndrome you get if you do as much as you possibly can.

    For the last two - three miles you feel (and probably look) like Jim Peters in the Vancover Commonwealth Games - like an exhausted waterlogged spider.
    You crawl across the line collapsing like Bannister (and him after only 3 minues 59.4 second of running, looking like Michealangelo's Slave awakening) and suddenly you are McGhee. No, not the one in NCIS, but the one who was 5 kilometers behind Peters when poor Jim was helped off the track yards from the finish. Jo McGhee was asleep in a ditch, taking a nap. Spectators woke him up to tell him he was in the lead. He trotted into the stadium and took the gold medal.

    Anyway...., sorry got a bit involved in that. Hope Ellis P Otter doesn't dig out video on that. It is all SO painful

    Wasn't complain',
    Just describin'
    Yep, confidin'
    'N' explainin'


    Yeah, then, when you've changed from Peters to McGhee after 10 minutes rest you feel you can run like Hemery in the Mexico final. But it's too late. Your day is done. For you the jooging is over.

    If you integrate across the run, aggregating the time when hyour knee didn't hurt with the time you didn't feel shory of breath and those moments when your calves didn't ache, and the five minutes that your feet weren't sore, you get a very pleasing picture of yourself. You don't see yourself as geriatric at all. You even feel up to missing out on the hot milk and waterbottle that night. Not geriatric at all.

    Complain about this comment

  • 107. At 8:47pm on 02 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    Any cider left? Will swap for some rioja

    Complain about this comment

  • 108. At 8:57pm on 02 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    No need to swap Stewart, just help yourself!

    ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 109. At 9:03pm on 02 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    Thank you P Nutt, I will.

    Complain about this comment

  • 110. At 9:55pm on 02 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    I shall. Ta

    Complain about this comment

  • 111. At 11:59pm on 02 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Not that it will interest many here, I thought this was kind of fun, I decided to introduce a cameo in my current animation project. Bank holidays have a tendency to do this to me what with the extra sunshine, ice creams and general frivolity!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vR5aVS2HB3Q

    Complain about this comment

  • 112. At 00:19am on 03 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    Mmm, Ellis - intriguing! "It's the others we need to worry about", indeed.

    One tiny comment - you've made his hands far too big. GB's hands are very small, especially in comparison to his rather oversized head. Not that I could do anything like your amazing animation. Very impressed!

    Complain about this comment

  • 113. At 00:57am on 03 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Thanks, big Sis, I'll get that sorted! I knew there was something wrong ;-\

    Complain about this comment

  • 114. At 08:01am on 03 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Morning Peeps de Beach.

    A damp BH Monday here in RL but the forecast is predicting it brightening up later...finger crossed.

    Anyhoo, a selection of breakfast cereals, fruit salad and fresh orange juice awaits.

    BTW Nice one Ellis, but will you be, in order to bring a balanced view, 'doing' Dave Hairproducts 2010 and Cleggy as well?

    :-p

    Complain about this comment

  • 115. At 11:30am on 03 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    Well just harvested about half my front lawn crop of dandelions. It's in a right mess now with lots of small holes where I've been trying to get the roots out.

    Decided it's coffee and cake time. Still some birthday cake left from Saturday.

    Complain about this comment

  • 116. At 12:26pm on 03 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    114 - P_Nutt, I don't think there's much I can do with the other two applicants for the job. There's no character to them!

    Complain about this comment

  • 117. At 2:39pm on 03 May 2010, GotToTheEnd wrote:

    115

    Wine, mate.


    Though in my case 'Whine!' cos I lost a tooth at school when a mad history teacher cum cricket 'coach' bowled flat out in the 'slow' net, at me.
    The ball reared up off a length and a dandelion root and leaf floret.

    The old groundsman pulled my tooth free of the string of gum it was dangling from. 'You won't need that, mate' He threw it into the long grass.
    'Oh, sorry. old chap' the six foot six Oxford ('Teddy Hall, good for cricket') fellow said in his cut glass tones 'You can swear at me any time'

    I was fourteen. It was two days before O levels. My geography maps had extra capitals everywhere from red spots of blood.

    When my mother got home I held my hand in from of my mouth to break the news gently.

    For me, the worst thing was the mirror. I was sure I was ugly already. This I needed like a ....missing front tooth.

    The only consolation was my orthodontist the NHS gave me. She was SO beautiful. And she told me I had beautiful canines. And blushed as she did.


    http://www.allaboutlawns.com/lawn-weeds-pests/dandy-lion-taming-in-your-lawn.php

    Any use?


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xGHMJizES8&feature=related

    Join in?

    Complain about this comment

  • 118. At 2:51pm on 03 May 2010, Sid wrote:


    Always wondered where your anti-Oxbridge bias came from.

    Complain about this comment

  • 119. At 3:30pm on 03 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    I don't know if this is the place for this but here goes, you can always refer it and get the mods to kick it off.

    Question: Why does my mum and my brothers and sisters admire and are eternally grateful to the Labour party for the NHS.
    Well I’ll tell you why if I may.

    Way back in 1958 when I was 8 years old my dad whilst cycling to work came off his bike going down a steep hill and hit his head on the road.
    He was found unconscious in the road.
    In fact, the person who found him was a German ex-prisoner of war who remained in England. He said many years later that he thought my dad was not going to survive.
    He was eventually taken to the Lister Hospital in Hitchin. The police arrived to tell my mum of the accident and so my mum and her sister went to Hitchin. They then sat by my dad’s hospital bed, whilst he lay in a coma. The hospital told my mum that due to the extent of his head injuries meant that he was not likely to survive. He had a fractured skull and a hole smashed intothe left side above the temple.
    My grandmother was looking after us whilst my mum and my aunt were at the hospital.
    Later that evening my mum came home after catching the last bus and me and my two older brothers were sat down in the front room, my aunt and grandmother went into the other room to make the tea, and my mum told us that as my dad was so seriously injured and may not survive that we may have to be placed in a home. My sister a year younger than me would stay with my mum to help look after the babies. She hoped that we would stay together stay together and asked us to look after my younger brother, 2 years younger than me, during our time in the children’s home. We suddenly had to grow up our childhoods ended abruptly that fateful day.
    We had no car, we had no phone, however down the road was a lady who had a phone and so about 1.00 am the hospital phoned to say that as my dad was still alive they were going to send him to a specialist brain surgery unit.
    We were lucky as the brain surgery unit he was sent to was the St Barts Hospital Brain surgery unit that had been moved out of London due to the war and was set up at Hill End Hospital in St Albans. Before the war it was a mental hospital and the St Barts team were still there in 1958.
    They spent 9 hours operating on my dad picking broken bits of skull out of his brain on the left side. They also drilled a hole in the back of his head to sort out a blood clot.
    When my mum first saw him after the operation, he had tubes up his nose and head swathed in bandages. His face that my mum could see was all black and blue. He remained in a coma for a couple of weeks. The consultant said that there are several outcomes and that he may remain in a coma or survive and be an invalid or may not survive.
    Eventually he came out of the coma but he was paralysed down his right side and could not talk.
    He actually died while being operated on and they had to get his heart going again.
    The brain surgeon said that my dad survived because he had a strong heart and fortunately a thicker than average skull.
    He underwent a lot of Physiotherapy and speech therapy all on the NHS if we did not have the NHS he would have died as any insurance would not have paid for so much treatment.

    I’m sorry but I must break off now as I need a cup of tea and let my emotions settle down.

    Complain about this comment

  • 120. At 3:36pm on 03 May 2010, GotToTheEnd wrote:

    Years later, lion sans dent ('cos the orthodontic treatment was to last 5 years (sic) and my coming out at college had interupted that and put an end on't), my wonderfully theatrical Handsworth dentist was surveying the neglected irregular curves of tombstones that I used for teeth.

    The gaps were more interesting to him than the teeth. There were the two at where 1 and 3 lower right molars should have been standing, taken out to drain an absess under 2 (by another bloke who got struck off a month later for poking his business into his nose. (A Miles Kinton joke that he got from DMcN, I'm sure)
    Then trhe one that I lst (right upper, molar 2, when a wavew piced me up at Newquay and hurled me against thehip of a fellow teenager.
    Then...

    The Dentist said 'Wow, what bite! Can I take an impression?' Then 'Can I call my colleague in to look too?' And then 'I'm presenting a paper at a confernce next month. Can I use your X-rays and impressions as visi-aids?'

    And finally 'Yuo need a full programe' Musing 'I could pull those two together, or maybe slip a bridge in there, or maybe a couple of pegs with ceramic teeth or ..'
    He outlined four plans. I was wholly unsure.

    'Which would you choose?'
    'I wouldn't let my teeth get in that state in the first place'
    By avoiding dentists under the influence and school cricket teachers and big waves I suppose he meant.
    'But if you had what would choose?'
    'I wouldn't let my teeth get in that state. Look, I didn't' He showed me a perfect set of gnashers.

    Counterfactuals can be tricy little fellas.

    (I certify I did not get this anecdote from DMcN)

    Complain about this comment

  • 121. At 3:58pm on 03 May 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    Very tough for you Looter. Hope you can tell us what happened next after you've had your tea.

    Complain about this comment

  • 122. At 4:07pm on 03 May 2010, GotToTheEnd wrote:

    119

    Sorry, Looternite, didn't mean to interrupt a serious tale with my old hat.

    Complain about this comment

  • 123. At 4:16pm on 03 May 2010, GotToTheEnd wrote:

    120

    Sorry about this bit of mistyping - garbled even by my standards:


    Then trhe one that I lst (right upper, molar 2, when a wavew piced me up at Newquay and hurled me against thehip of a fellow teenager.


    It should have read

    Then the one that I lost (right upper, molar 2) when a wave picked me up on Newquay Beach (Check the AM GB post 63's link for what THAT beach's wildness) and hurled me against the hip of a fellow teenager.

    Complain about this comment

  • 124. At 4:29pm on 03 May 2010, GotToTheEnd wrote:

    118

    I don't have one.

    Complain about this comment

  • 125. At 4:57pm on 03 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    This is so difficult to say as it all comes back in waves. I’ve had a cup of tea but as soon as I begin typing the tears well up.
    My dad came out of his coma and was paralysed down his right side and could not read write or talk. It was as if his brain had reset.
    The hospital worked tirelessly with my dad doing his utmost to recover and my mum would have to get two buses to visit him.
    There were strict visiting rules and only one child over a certain age allowed. Technically I was too young to see him and my sister never saw him in hospital. My mum would take me or one of my older brothers in turn to visit my dad. When I first saw him the bandages had been removed but although smiling and nodding his head or shaking his head he was bed ridden but so pleased to see us. I was left to tell my dad what I had been doing at school while my mum spoke to the doctor.
    When it was time to leave we caught the bus back home and my mum cried most of the way home.
    The next time I went my dad was not in his bed. We sat beside the empty bed and then he came walking (sort of) with crutches down the ward. Trying to say “Hullo”. Again my mum burst out crying, but I knew these were tears of joy.
    Sorry overcome again must get another cupa.

    Complain about this comment

  • 126. At 5:33pm on 03 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    The next time I visited, my dad was with the speech therapist, she had, picture cards and cards with words getting my dad to say what was on the card, and put the written word with the picture. He had a similar condition as some people who have had a stroke.
    One day my mum told us that they were hoping to send him home for Christmas, depending on the opinion of the doctor.
    I will never forget that Christmas Eve there was a flurry of snow; my mum was concerned that it might stop the ambulance coming. We watched and hoped that the snow would not settle. It stopped snowing and the snow disappeared, we took it in turns to watch out for the ambulance.
    Then in the afternoon, an ambulance pulled up outside and an ambulance man came up the path with a bag of hospital stuff and my dad’s pyjamas etc.
    After awhile my dad walked up the path dragging his right leg and holding his right arm with his left hand. The path was too narrow for the Ambulance man to support him by his side, so he was walking behind my dad ready to catch him if he fell over.
    My dad came stumbling up the path with tears rolling freely down his cheeks. We were all crying (it was the most emotional time of our lives), even the ambulance men wiped away tears.
    My dad was helped into his chair by the ambulance man and whilst my mum went into the kitchen to make a cup of tea the Ambulance man instructed her in how to look after him. My dad just wanted to see us all and could now say “hullo” or “Yes/ No”.
    We had no presents that Christmas and we had no birthday presents that year. Our Christmas dinner was chicken supplied by my aunts and grandmother.
    After the Christmas was over my dad went back to hospital to continue the intensive physiotherapy and speech therapy.
    I remember as clear as anything going back to school after Christmas and all the kids saying what they had got for Christmas when they asked me all I could say was “my dad came home”.
    Bloody hell that memory has brought back the tears.
    Another cuppa is needed.
    Sorry if this is dragging on a bit.

    Complain about this comment

  • 127. At 5:38pm on 03 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    I think the fine gentleman from Luton deserves a bottle of this to help him through the evening.

    Complain about this comment

  • 128. At 6:10pm on 03 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Mister Nutt, not sure about looternite but I will take a dram, thank you. More particularly, thank you Looternite! This story must be very painful to share... and yet, I do want to know how it goes on and concludes, if it's okay?

    Complain about this comment

  • 129. At 6:47pm on 03 May 2010, Innocuous Nickname wrote:

    119. Looternite

    • "I’m sorry but I must break off now as I need a cup of tea and let my emotions settle down."


    Me too!

    Complain about this comment

  • 130. At 6:51pm on 03 May 2010, Innocuous Nickname wrote:

    126. Looternite

    • "Another cuppa is needed.
      Sorry if this is dragging on a bit."


    Don't apologise. Tears here, too.

    Complain about this comment

  • 131. At 6:53pm on 03 May 2010, Innocuous Nickname wrote:

    127. P Nutt

    • "I think the fine gentleman from Luton deserves a bottle of this to help him through the evening. "


    And I'll have one (just to keep youse company)

    Complain about this comment

  • 132. At 7:06pm on 03 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    Looternite, what a heart wrenching story!

    I doubt there are many families in this country who do not have good reason to be grateful for the NHS. I remember watching Dr. Finlay's Casebook as a child and feeling amazed that people had to pay their doctors. Some years later I was living in Spain and fell ill with chickenpox. As an adult, it was pretty severe, so I went to the doctor. The prescribed medicines were expensive and I could only afford one of them.

    About twenty five years ago my father (who had been diagnosed as having an aneurism) was saved from an early death by the skill of an NHS surgeon. His life was on a knife edge, platelets had to be sent down by courier from London, and the surgeon worked until the early hours to stabilise him. The care and skill of that man gave my father another fifteen years of active, happy life in which he saw the birth of his second grandchild and celebrated both golden and sixtieth wedding anniversaries with my mother.

    I never forget that this, along with other boons that were previously denied the less well off, were brought to us by a Labour government.

    Complain about this comment

  • 133. At 7:44pm on 03 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    NHS is a great thing. And looterite, your story is as sis says, heart wrenching. The NHS not perfect, I know of folk who, when given a prescription for three of four items can't even afford the NHS charge for these. I am sure RxKaren will have tales of folk asking which ones off a list of medicines they should get.

    Complain about this comment

  • 134. At 8:09pm on 03 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    P Nutt, Ellis P Otter, Best Outcome, Big Sister and Stewart_M

    Your kind words have meant so much to me and have brought on the tears again.

    Thank you, Thank you.
    I will continue later if I may as I have to collect my thoughts and settle my emotions.

    Complain about this comment

  • 135. At 9:13pm on 03 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Leonid and Igor insisted on building a Snug round the back of Nick's. They said to me "it's very British", I said "waste of money".

    They were right, as ever. Let's all retire to the Snug.

    Complain about this comment

  • 136. At 11:26pm on 03 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    Believe me, Stewart, prescription charges here are nothing like the cost of having to purchase medicines at full cost, as I was expected to do in Spain. That much said, it is a pity they have to be as high now as they are.

    And let's not start on dental costs .... but it is an imperfect world. However, to know that, whatever one's income, one can always get medical attention and that there is a workforce dedicated to the ideals of the NHS is a great comfort to us all - and one which we tend to take for granted.

    Complain about this comment

  • 137. At 00:19am on 04 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    My dad returned to hospital, they did their best with physiotherapy and speech therapy, and they tried to teach him to write with his left hand. His handwriting was not very good and my mum wrote everything from then on and even used to write his signature for him. He finally returned home for good as his recovery had reached a certain level. My dad always walked with a limp and held his right hand awkwardly. He also had a problem with speech as he would have to pause to think how to say the correct word, he used to say, “I can see the word but can’t say it”. My dad worked for Vauxhall and they had a rehabilitation centre (I know lefties did not like the paternalistic attitude of large employers) when my dad was finally able to return to work he went to the rehabilitation centre and after a while he was assessed and declared able to work back in the press shop.
    He returned to full time employment although on the disabled register this meant that he earned 6 pence an hour less than other workers did but they allowed him to leave 5 mins before clocking off time so he could be ahead of the rush. This niggled my dad always after as he wanted the full pay and did not care about the 5 mins.
    At first, my dad caught the bus but then the bus started to be a bit unreliable and would occasionally get him to work after 7:30. Unbelievable as it seems my dad decided to get back on his bike and ride the same route to work. This he continued to do for some years until he got a bit knackered and used to get a lift with another bloke in the village that had a car. My dad’s life revolved around work, the garden and allotment and the family. Later he got a great deal of pleasure seeing the grandchildren, he tended to spoil the grand children a bit.
    As we say, my dad went to hell and back when he went to fight the Japanese in the jungles of Burma but it was the accident on a Hertfordshire road that was the worst hell that changed his life and ours.
    My dad had a hole in the side of his head the size of a half-crown and a hole in the back of his head was about the size of an old halfpenny. His skull also had cracks that you could feel. They offered to insert steel plates to cover the holes but as there was a risk my dad did not want to push his luck anymore and so never had the plates fitted. Every year my dad for many years would go to St Barts for the Brain surgeons to check his progress and students would gather to watch him walk and test his speech.
    During the time my dad was not working he received sick pay that in those days was a lot less than the working wage. We have no idea how my mum managed to put food on the table and pay the bills. My mum kept us all together and we did not have to go into a home. When it came out that some kids in homes at that time were abused my mum said “thank god I kept us all together as if you had gone to a home and been abused I would never have forgiven myself.”
    My dad continued to work for Vauxhall until the 1980’s when he was offered early retirement, aged 63. The Tories desperate to fiddle the unemployment numbers came up with a wheeze. The much-trumpeted plan was for employers to release the older workers and employ younger people. In fact, Vauxhall used this as one of the methods to downsize the work force and get rid of the older workers. Therefore, my dad retired without losing any money and he enjoyed a couple of years of relaxation until his health deteriorated. He became ill and it took a while before they found out it was a rare form of leukaemia. If it had been a Bone marrow problem, he would have had a good chance of a match as he had 6 sons and 2 daughters. The only treatment was for regular blood transfusions but the time between transfusions got shorter and shorter.
    One Friday evening my mum called to say my dad had slipped down the stairs and was unable to get up he was also bleeding from his mouth. An ambulance was called and when I got to my mum’s home the ambulance had arrived they took him to hospital with my mum and I followed. The accident and emergency doctor came through to my mum and me and said he was fine and we could take him home soon. My mum said “you sure he is very ill you know and due to come in next week anyway”. The accident and emergency doctor said his mouth will stop bleeding and we don’t have the beds, in the doctors opinion my dad did not need to stay in. My mum said something like please talk to Dr --- as I am sure he will want to know. The young Doctor seemed a bit annoyed and said I will try but I am sure he will agree that an overnight stay is not necessary. We waited ages and then into the room came the specialist who was treating my dad and he assured us that my dad would remain in hospital until he had been properly assessed. When we said that the other Dr had said there were no beds, the specialist said I have a spare bed for my patients and your husband will be in one of them.
    My dad went up to the ward and the following day the specialist said that unfortunately after their tests my dad was no longer responding to blood transfusions as the cancer was too far advanced.
    He passed away on the Wednesday peacefully and due to the high levels of medication painlessly.
    He was just over 70 and we think he had had enough.
    My mum now aged 85 misses him very much, but she was such a tower of strength and when she goes the world will be a poorer place.
    Therefore, you see why we hold the NHS is such esteem and admire the skill and dedication of all the medical staff that make the NHS work. My dad was an uneducated man who left school at 14, no doubt in the scheme of things not an important man but he was our dad. It was due to the unbelievable skill of the medical team that operated on him and the Physiotherapy, speech therapy experts that worked so hard to return my dad to us.
    So we say a big thank you to these people, you deserve to be well paid and to be honoured for your dedication.
    There it has been difficult to write this but I feel that although you are technically strangers I feel that you are understanding and I feel less burdened now I have shared this part of my life.
    Thank you for listening.

    Complain about this comment

  • 138. At 02:53am on 04 May 2010, GotToTheEnd wrote:

    Human kind
    Cannot bear very much reality.

    So offered Eliot in Burnt Norton.

    Looternite, you are teaching me how to.

    PLease find in these words, salutations, commiseration and admiration.

    Complain about this comment

  • 139. At 07:18am on 04 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Thanks Looternite for sharing that with us.

    Complain about this comment

  • 140. At 07:24am on 04 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    Thanks Looternite, it was moving to read though I'm sure not as moving as for you to write.

    Complain about this comment

  • 141. At 09:59am on 04 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    ld 140, But he never did finish his story about visiting me in hospital.

    I wonder if Looter was in the rioting crowd after Luton's loss to York last night?

    Complain about this comment

  • 142. At 09:59am on 04 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Looternite, I admire your fortitude in relating all this personal history to us. May your memories give us all pause for reflection and gratitude for the service and conviction of others.

    Thank you.

    Complain about this comment

  • 143. At 10:19am on 04 May 2010, Sid wrote:


    'although you are technically strangers' ...

    Well, slightly less now than we were before, I think. Thanks.

    Complain about this comment

  • 144. At 10:49am on 04 May 2010, The Intermittent Horse wrote:

    Looternite - Thanks for posting that. As someone who, as a visitor, has seen seen more than enough of A&E, high dependency units and specialist wards over the past few months, I join you in your admiration of the staff that make the NHS work. Aside from the medical skills, I have been deeply impressed by the care, attention and sensitivity displayed by all I have seen on the various wards.

    Complain about this comment

  • 145. At 10:50am on 04 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    I really don't know what to say, Looternite, other than to tell you that I am in tears as I write this.

    Your Dad was a very special man, and his family deserved him. Give my best wishes to your Mum. I'm sure you help to make her life as happy as possible.

    Complain about this comment

  • 146. At 11:11am on 04 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Bit late I know but there is a large tray of bacon geralds at NC's.

    :-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 147. At 11:17am on 04 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Mmmm, elevenses, brown sauce or ketchup? It's raining out, so brown I think. And tea from a china pot.

    Complain about this comment

  • 148. At 11:23am on 04 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    EpO 147, It's raining brown sauce?

    Complain about this comment

  • 149. At 11:33am on 04 May 2010, The Intermittent Horse wrote:

    EPO (147) - Your choice of condiment is dictated by precipitation?
    What conditions obtain when you reach for the ketchup?

    Complain about this comment

  • 150. At 11:37am on 04 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    148 - Nope, just brown volcanic ash. 149 - ketchup on sunnier days, mustard on feast days, nothing on holy days ;-) or just what is closest.

    Complain about this comment

  • 151. At 12:12pm on 04 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    ExpectingtheEnd, Lady Sue, P Nutt, Ellis P Otter, Big Sister, Hung Parliament, lucien desgai, The Intermittent Horse, Sid, davmcn, et al.
    I am humbled by your kind words.

    Yes, Big Sister we try to do stuff for my Mum, and constantly offer, but she says I’ll tell you what needs doing, I’m not incapable yet!
    After her stoke whenever anyone goes to see her she asks us to open a jar or some difficult packaging. What she enjoys the most is a bit of company. By the way, no one rides a bike to my Mum’s unless they are wearing a cycle helmet; she would go on so much.
    I never expected to write so much but once I started, it all just poured out. The long buried memories of me when I was an 8 year old. The faint memory of my dad before his accident when he would run about kicking a ball with my brothers and me. The post accident dad who could no longer run and was no longer fun.
    The media always talks about the Consultants, the Surgeons and the drug therapy. However, in reality it is the other highly trained medical staff, Anaesthetists, Physiotherapists, Radiologists, Speech therapists, Pharmacists and Nurses, that make the whole NHS work effectively. It’s the whole team puts people back together and back home to their loved ones.
    So let’s pay them properly and let’s say a big “Thank You” to the staff and the NHS organisation. Also, a very big Thank You to the visionaries who set up the NHS at a very difficult post war Britain.
    This is the first time my Dad’s accident has been put in writing and thanks to you all for your patience for my rambling.

    Complain about this comment

  • 152. At 12:37pm on 04 May 2010, Sid wrote:


    Looternite - hear, hear. I had an op ten years ago, and it's the anaesthetist I remember most. 'Any worries?' he asked. 'Yes,' I said. 'Two.' 'What are they?' 'I'm worried that I won't be under when they're operating. And I'm worried that I won't wake up again afterwards.' 'Don't worry about that,' he said, 'there's far too much paperwork involved if we let that happen.'

    Complain about this comment

  • 153. At 12:58pm on 04 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Ellis P Otter 147, what do you use if it is snowing?

    Sid 152, perhaps that is why so much crime goes undetected...too much paperwork?

    :-p

    Complain about this comment

  • 154. At 1:15pm on 04 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    153 P Nutt - Obvious! Horseradish relish :-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 155. At 1:34pm on 04 May 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    138. ExpectingtheEnd

    • "PLease find in these words, salutations, commiseration and admiration."


    And I echo that. I just read through the final instalment, and found I'd missed half of Martha through being so drawn into it.

    God(s) Bless you and yours.

    Complain about this comment

  • 156. At 2:38pm on 04 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    Listening to Gentleman Jim on R4 I am charmed to hear that they kept my friend Camilla in the play. She appeared in the original book by Raymond Briggs, and it always makes me chuckle to think that I know a 'comic book' character in real life! ;o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 157. At 3:06pm on 04 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Slightly past the time for a nice sit down and a cup of tea.

    But what the heck, better late than never. Anyone got some biscuits?

    :-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 158. At 3:57pm on 04 May 2010, Cash Hughes wrote:

    I've brought some crawn prackers if anyone fancies them.

    Complain about this comment

  • 159. At 4:07pm on 04 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    I feel another multiple personality coming on. ;o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 160. At 4:23pm on 04 May 2010, Sid wrote:


    Peanuts, anybody? Cashews? Pistachios?

    Complain about this comment

  • 161. At 4:23pm on 04 May 2010, RxKaren wrote:

    (151 Looternite) - As someone who has passed to "the dark side" (private healthcare) I'm also aware that no comment is ever made about the work that all in the NHS do with the training of students. I was lucky enough to get work in two Trusts during my university years, the NHS provided pharmacists to come and lecture to us at Uni and my pre-reg year was spent effectively shadowing the professionals and learning the trade in an apprenticeship. I learned so much from my colleagues and my patients - probably more than I ever did at Uni - and I owe a great debt to them. I often think back with fond memories of my time in the NHS (try to forget the 2am callouts and the abuse from relatives as I tried to do my job) and even now as I look at safety information from other countries I'm conscious of the number of references to "safety initiatives from the UK NHS" on other websites.

    The UK health service is world-class. The needless provision of the same information in two formats for two parts of the same organisation isn't. The target culture isn't. I don't remember either of those being part of the original plan though.

    (152 Sid) Be thankful you weren't a friend of one of my anaesthetists! They run through the "Do we really need anaesthetic for this?", "Nurse, pass me the really big needle," and "Just a little prick - has that ever been said to you before?" before they send you off to sleep. Despite that I'd trust any of them!

    Complain about this comment

  • 162. At 4:32pm on 04 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    RxK 161, They now say that you might feel a little scratch.

    Complain about this comment

  • 163. At 4:33pm on 04 May 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    160. Sid

    • "Pistachios?"


    Drunk sneezes?

    Complain about this comment

  • 164. At 4:33pm on 04 May 2010, Sid wrote:


    Bless you!

    Complain about this comment

  • 165. At 4:34pm on 04 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    Cash Hughes 158, Gesundheit.

    Complain about this comment

  • 166. At 4:37pm on 04 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    CaAshooo!

    Complain about this comment

  • 167. At 4:38pm on 04 May 2010, Anne P wrote:

    ** tiptoes out from behind the dunes **

    Hello everyone. So glad I chose to come back now and to take the time to catch up.

    Looternite - an amazing story. Thank you so much for sharing it.

    Been off dealing with funeral and aftermath of father-in-law's death aged 102. Was initially upset that he was sent to the local hospital rather than left in the home, but the staff in A&E were great. Assessed what could be done, tried a few things, told us he had pneumonia and was not responding and then disconnected him from all the unecessary stuff and wheeled him into a side room where we could all be together quietly away from beepings and Friday night drunks. Like Looternite's story - the sort of care you can't put a price on.

    Now, Mr Nutt, will morning coffee biscuits do? They're all I've got left.

    Complain about this comment

  • 168. At 4:46pm on 04 May 2010, RxKaren wrote:

    Dave (162) - They do if they don't know you! If you're one of 'us' you get the full wind up before the op. "The surgeon claims he's doing an arthroscopy but I've been booked to gas for a castration. What did your consent form say?" is apparently another one that our maintenance man experienced. They're a great bunch though. The list I watched the other day had a terrified member of staff come into the anaesthetic room who was completely chilled after the routine. With the general public it is the calm, caring professionalism that settles you down. I'd expect heckling on the formulary restrictions before they anaesthetised me to distract me...

    Complain about this comment

  • 169. At 5:05pm on 04 May 2010, Sid wrote:


    The double act who were sorting me out offered the vision of Brazil v Italy ladies volleyball final to take with me ... and then, just as I was about to go under, one of them offered Manchester City as an alternative. I've never forgiven him.

    Complain about this comment

  • 170. At 5:11pm on 04 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    RxK 168, Don't you say orchidectomy? The nurses I saw all said "...a little scratch." Probably expecting Looter to show up.

    Complain about this comment

  • 171. At 5:13pm on 04 May 2010, davmcn wrote:

    EPO 166, Use Vaseline. (see my previous)

    Complain about this comment

  • 172. At 5:17pm on 04 May 2010, RxKaren wrote:

    (170) Doesn't have the same comedy value! I was really impressed with my colleagues during my insight into the anaesthetic room. I ended up chatting about the village I used to live in with our first patient(she came from there) whilst the anaesthetist was playing around with spinal anaesthesia. The patient hadn't slept all night for fear of what we'd do to her but the easy chat (and holding her hand for her whilst they injected her back) completely calmed her. I didn't think I'd done anything but she remembered me despite all the midazolam. A real lesson in how important the human touch is.

    Complain about this comment

  • 173. At 6:38pm on 04 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    Thanks Big Jim, Anne P and RxKaren
    Sorry if I upset anyone, I feel you are all friends.

    Off to see my Mum and give her a hug.

    Complain about this comment

  • 174. At 6:46pm on 04 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Karen - A real lesson in how important the human touch is.

    Two years ago back in the bush, a distress call came over the radio that the, seriously overweight and bad-living, manager of a safari lodge upriver had collapsed in reception. Guessing the worst, I grabbed the "kit" and drove at an illegal speed, scattering elephants (who took days to forgive me later) out of the route.

    At the lodge the man was sitting trapped behind the reception counter, his considerable bulk making it awkward for access. He was sweating and breathing with great effort. All around him, were, maybe a dozen people, all gabbling and in a kind of panic.

    Simply, by the act of kneeling down and taking his hand, saying "Hugo, we'll sort this", calmed the whole situation down, particularly the very scared man.

    Any of those present, expert safari guides most of them, could have done that.

    Hugo was actually in a very bad way, but not as bad as everybody seemed to think and I settled him with emOx and a single asprin. Then it was down to business, documentation and S.A.M.P.L.E. and organising the Medevac.

    Karen, do you teach, being reassuring on your First Aid courses?

    Complain about this comment

  • 175. At 7:47pm on 04 May 2010, RxKaren wrote:

    We were talking about this the other night. A colleague was going through approaching a casualty and we debated the need to be realistic but to say something like, "You're safe. I'm going to do my best to take care of you." The consensus was that it was reassuring without raising hopes so it's in! One of the team tried it yesterday at a horse event and said it felt ok to say.

    Complain about this comment

  • 176. At 7:52pm on 04 May 2010, RxKaren wrote:

    Probably better than the response we had with a rider that fell off their horse one year at the point to point. A colleague held up a flag to summon an ambulance and the casualty came round to the sight of a vet with a shotgun. He got confused with the flag colours. Not helped by his red-green colour blindness and having red and green signal flags...

    Complain about this comment

  • 177. At 8:12pm on 04 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Peeps.....please, much that I have enjoyed the excursion, remember that this is 'The Beach' and is surreal and not supposed to be a shadow of RL. We come here to escape RL, much like Diggles does.

    ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 178. At 8:20pm on 04 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    You are right P Nutt, I have a man on it right now.

    Karen does tend to talk about her work a lot. And I get drawn in ... sorry ...

    Complain about this comment

  • 179. At 8:49pm on 04 May 2010, RxKaren wrote:

    Day off today though Ellis! Anyone fancy joining me with some shiraz before I have to return...

    Complain about this comment

  • 180. At 8:58pm on 04 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Did you need to ask? ;-) I've just created a massive leftovers omelette.

    So, a few chips and we're set for the night...

    Complain about this comment

  • 181. At 9:04pm on 04 May 2010, RxKaren wrote:

    Perfect! And a bit of Rory B on More4 (am I allowed to put that on a BBC blog!?)

    Complain about this comment

  • 182. At 9:06pm on 04 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Ellis 178, So that is where my barrow and leaf rake went!

    :-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 183. At 9:27pm on 04 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Karen 181 - Good tip BBF was highlighted on Ubend today but it's gone now. Time to send the mouse to work.

    182 - Yup, you complaining? Your lawn has been a mess since ... since ... I dunno I didn't think that through.

    Complain about this comment

  • 184. At 9:51pm on 04 May 2010, RxKaren wrote:

    Friday's golden moment is on audioboo. World Service apparently covered it.

    Complain about this comment

  • 185. At 11:14pm on 04 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    I've been watching protestors in Greece. I think they were Mathematicians, their equations looked complicated but I suspect they all work out to 42.

    Complain about this comment

  • 186. At 11:31pm on 04 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    'Surreal'? Not really that - just a place to relax.

    I have no problem with listening to 'life's adventures' on this thread, for we can do so with a virtual glass of 'whatever we fancy' in our hands as we lie back in our virtual deckchairs ...

    :o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 187. At 00:25am on 05 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    If anyone want me I'll be in my sandcastle in the sky, chomping candyfloss and spitting on the camels (it helps to keep them cool).

    Complain about this comment

  • 188. At 07:10am on 05 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Morning Peeps!
    The various remaining baby rabbit body parts and fur left on our door step testifies that Spring really is here and that Rosie will not be needing so much cat food for a while!

    Anyhoo, tea, coffee, fresh orange juice and cross aunts are now ready. You all have a nice day.

    :-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 189. At 09:10am on 05 May 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    P_Nutt! Too much information. Poor little bunnikins. I hope you gave the remains a decent burial? Give Rosie MORE cat food - hoping she wont hunt if she has a full tummy.

    Looks like we'll need a beach umbrella on this side of the sands today. What's for breakfast? Any waffles?

    Complain about this comment

  • 190. At 09:13am on 05 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Lady_Sue, yep, the compost bin!

    And I hear there may be cross aunts available at NC's

    :-p

    Complain about this comment

  • 191. At 09:52am on 05 May 2010, Anne P wrote:

    Morning all, waffles sounds lovely thanks. I'll put the kettle on.

    Complain about this comment

  • 192. At 10:14am on 05 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    PNutt: If that's what you do with their remains, I suspect you may have a rat problem.

    Complain about this comment

  • 193. At 10:17am on 05 May 2010, Anne P wrote:

    Talking of rodent problems does anyone know of a foolproof way of feeding the birds without attracting rats. I seem to have moved my problem around rather than solving it.

    Complain about this comment

  • 194. At 10:37am on 05 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    193. Anne P
    I know the problem, it's the food that falls on the ground that attracts the rodents.

    I would also like to hear of a solution.

    Complain about this comment

  • 195. At 10:52am on 05 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    You could try fixing a tray of some kind underneath the feeding station and empty the 'leavings' each evening, Anne. Might be best if the 'tray' is above ground level. It also gives other birds the chance to peck at those bits while others are feeding on the fatballs, etc.

    Complain about this comment

  • 196. At 11:05am on 05 May 2010, Anne P wrote:

    Big Sister I had thought of it, but it would have to be several extremely large trays given that I have several feeders and the starlings and larger birds scatter the food far and wide!

    Complain about this comment

  • 197. At 11:10am on 05 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    Tarpaulin, Anne?

    Complain about this comment

  • 198. At 11:26am on 05 May 2010, Anne P wrote:

    197 :-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 199. At 11:38am on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    I just popped in for elevenses and am shocked to learn that there are rats all over the place! I never had that problem in the bush.

    However I had a look for some advice and found: Drop some maize in a 1 to 2 inch diameter whole, and make the whole about 6 inches deep. This will make it to where only one or two rats can eat at a time and they will stay in your baited area for longer. Then sit and wait with your gun and a flashlight.

    Complain about this comment

  • 200. At 12:01pm on 05 May 2010, Innocuous Nickname wrote:

    199. Ellis P Otter

    • "Then sit and wait with your gun and a flashlight."


    Better still, put some corn in the bottom of a large metal barrel and lay a long plank sloping up to the rim. You'll only need the gun for the last one.

    Complain about this comment

  • 201. At 12:02pm on 05 May 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    200 Not Out! Howzzat?

    Anne, what about a cardboard cutout cat?

    Complain about this comment

  • 202. At 12:02pm on 05 May 2010, The Intermittent Horse wrote:

    EPO - Is 6 inches the hole depth of the whole?

    Complain about this comment

  • 203. At 12:03pm on 05 May 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    Horse, do you know how many 'hads' it is possible to get in one sensible sentence?

    Complain about this comment

  • 204. At 12:08pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    202 - Horse, they daft southern rednecks can't spell! And I can't cut and paste too good neither!

    203 - Sue, I seem to remember somebody telling me it was a lot and reciting a sentence that made no sense to me whatsoever ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 205. At 12:09pm on 05 May 2010, The Intermittent Horse wrote:

    Yep!

    Complain about this comment

  • 206. At 12:19pm on 05 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    203. Lady Sue
    From what I remember, it only makes sense by the use of several commas.

    Complain about this comment

  • 207. At 12:21pm on 05 May 2010, Innocuous Nickname wrote:

    193. Anne P

    • "Talking of rodent problems does anyone know of a foolproof way of feeding the birds without attracting rats. I seem to have moved my problem around rather than solving it."


    Never give them so much food at one time that there is any left on the ground. This is a common problem with 'hobby farmers' like ourselves. We put out food for the sheep [insert livestock of choice] and they scoff the lot. So we give them a bit more and they scoff that too, and so we give them even more, etc., until they leave a bit [and the grass grows wildly]. Then we complain about rats.

    With feeding the birds, I only use suspended feeding points, virtually inaccessible to rats (though nothing really is), and sprinkle a wee bit on the ground.

    The whole lot is hung from a cantilevered pole, tied back to the house, as Sort of visible here. Some food is inevitably spilt by the birds, but others clear it up, and we've had no rats since we stopped putting larger quantities on the ground.

    If you do get rats and can find their diggings, I suggest you leave them a wee blue treat about a foot or more down their main entrance.

    ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 208. At 12:31pm on 05 May 2010, Big Jim wrote:

    This year, for the first time so far as I know, we've got jackdaws coming to the seed feeders. The magpies are back as well, so I reckon I'd better oil the shotgun...

    Overrun with squirrels - must be almost a dozen different ones visiting and playing chasey=chasey through the branches and up and down the treetrunks. It's fun watching the wee jack russell watching them - you can imagine him imagining following them into their aerial playground. Me too, if I'm honest. They are magnificent and almost fearless.

    Complain about this comment

  • 209. At 12:52pm on 05 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    205. The Intermittent Horse

    I should have refressed this page before my #206

    Thanks for the link.

    Complain about this comment

  • 210. At 2:10pm on 05 May 2010, Innocuous Nickname wrote:

    Sis,

    131. At 1:49pm on 05 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    Hung Parliament, would you kindly stick to one name, please, as I (and presumably some others) are aware that you are posting under three different names on the blog at the moment?

    For anyone not familiar with your style, this is extremely misleading since you are constantly supporting yourself and your point of view as if you were three different people ....

    Ouch!

    Just trying to keep some powder dry and clear pre-mod. I'm outnumb3red!

    ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 211. At 2:12pm on 05 May 2010, Innocuous Nickname wrote:

    210. Hung Parliament

    • "and clear pre-mod."


    Seems I have!

    Whooppppeeeeee!

    Complain about this comment

  • 212. At 2:15pm on 05 May 2010, GotToTheEnd wrote:

    TIH

    It was someone, Gillianian or Chris Ghoti I think, who had had a sentence which had had one more had than that one had

    Some time ago

    I wondeed whether thewre was a L'pool equivalent with 'thingy's in profusion - though not consecutively I guess

    Complain about this comment

  • 213. At 3:45pm on 05 May 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    Horse, should have known - though going to Wiki is a tiny bit of a cheat.

    HungP: good advice re. the amount of food for birdies. Thanks. Will return cardboard cut out cat to cupboard. So who else are you?

    Just getting the PiMMs ingredients to whip up a giggling size jug full for 5pm kick off. Thank goodness this election caper will be all over soon.

    Complain about this comment

  • 214. At 3:55pm on 05 May 2010, Innocuous Nickname wrote:

    213. Lady Sue

    • "HungP: good advice re. the amount of food for birdies. Thanks. Will return cardboard cut out cat to cupboard. So who else are you? "


    I;m rather fond of nuts, too!

    ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 215. At 3:56pm on 05 May 2010, Cash Hughes wrote:

    214. Hung Parliament

    • "I;m rather fond of nuts, too!"


    Surely not P Nutt!

    Complain about this comment

  • 216. At 4:05pm on 05 May 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    HungP: were you, elsewhere on the blog and I can't find it due to sloth, asking about Mexico by any chance? In NSW they call Victorians 'Mexicans' and much the same happens here in Ireland. That is, when we aren't being called 'Culshies' because we live outside Dublin, in the country. Of course, if you're from Offaly and male, you are commonly referred to as a BIFFO. Best not ask.

    Complain about this comment

  • 217. At 4:14pm on 05 May 2010, Innocuous Nickname wrote:

    216. Lady Sue

    None of the above

    Complain about this comment

  • 218. At 4:21pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Did I just hear Igor and Leonid singing on Radio Four? I nearly spilt my tea!

    Complain about this comment

  • 219. At 5:59pm on 05 May 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    Hung P: suspect you are being a very naughty boy and should go straight to the naughty step. There are three split levels - one for each of your personalities.

    Complain about this comment

  • 220. At 6:03pm on 05 May 2010, Innocuous Nickname wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 221. At 6:19pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Sadly, I think Walnut has gone nuts ... finally. All the excitement, I guess.

    Or, maybe, it's the frustration of being disenfranchised and showered with volkie dust.

    Anyhoo, I'm doing chicken fried rice tonight. The rabbit was tempting but after rescuing what was left from the potato peelings and moss that P Nutt trashed among, I reconsidered.

    Now, who likes saki?

    Complain about this comment

  • 222. At 6:55pm on 05 May 2010, Alan_N wrote:

    Mrs N is from home this evening, so it's a very naughty take away from the Something-or-other of India for me.

    Complain about this comment

  • 223. At 7:01pm on 05 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Ellis!

    If you really want a Rabbit or two let me know..I can supply!

    ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 224. At 7:19pm on 05 May 2010, Sid wrote:


    "Twins reunited after separation surgery"

    I wonder why.

    Complain about this comment

  • 225. At 7:26pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    P Nutt, in RL I have a reliable local supplier - but thanks for the offer, I appreciate your thought.

    Hint, do NOT google Saki images! Zoiks, that was the kind of thing that wake up the thought police. I think we'll settle for the local Highland Park as anything else could be regarded as dodgy.

    Complain about this comment

  • 226. At 7:28pm on 05 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    'ang a trout!

    How many Mrs N's are there?

    Mine has not left Sprout Towers in search of 'naughty' take-aways for some considerable time.
    Well not since the episode with the whip that is.
    But nothing was proved anyway as the CCTV camera was all misted up.

    ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 227. At 7:45pm on 05 May 2010, Innocuous Nickname wrote:

    221. Ellis P Otter

    • "Or, maybe, it's the frustration of being disenfranchised"


    The words nail and head spring to mind!

    Complain about this comment

  • 228. At 8:22pm on 05 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    Mr Nutt, Naughty take aways. Selling rabbits. Have you got a second job with anne?

    Complain about this comment

  • 229. At 9:03pm on 05 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Yeah, we are trying to flog this dead horse!

    Complain about this comment

  • 230. At 9:20pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 231. At 9:34pm on 05 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    I'll happily eat horse steak. Sorry TIH.

    Complain about this comment

  • 232. At 9:52pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 233. At 10:03pm on 05 May 2010, The Intermittent Horse wrote:

    Lady Sue (213) - I knew the answer. I only went to Wiki for the explanation.

    Complain about this comment

  • 234. At 10:04pm on 05 May 2010, Cash Hughes wrote:

    232. Ellis P Otter

    • "This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules. "


    Oooooo Errr! What did you say?

    Which rule did you break? The unwritten one?

    Complain about this comment

  • 235. At 10:05pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    I await the email for my 232 with some interest, being as I disagree.

    Complain about this comment

  • 236. At 10:07pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Darn fine recipe, I thought!

    Complain about this comment

  • 237. At 10:29pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    I thought the mods were supposed to send an email when you offended the board.

    What's going on?

    I'm going to kick sand in somebody's face in a minute ...

    Complain about this comment

  • 238. At 10:52pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    No email so I wrote to pmfeedack.

    I'm really cross about this!

    Complain about this comment

  • 239. At 10:56pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    pmfeedback - not feed ducks or any other spellings that are available

    Complain about this comment

  • 240. At 11:00pm on 05 May 2010, Cash Hughes wrote:

    In my brief experience, the email is virtually instantaneous! Have you more than one email address?

    Complain about this comment

  • 241. At 11:10pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    This email is always available. I have received other emails since my undeserved censorship at this address. Maybe my ISP is censoring them?

    Complain about this comment

  • 242. At 11:48pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Still nothing ...

    Who is it who censors me?

    Just nothing ...

    It was just a recipe for a stew ...

    Still nothing ...

    Why?

    Complain about this comment

  • 243. At 11:58pm on 05 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 244. At 00:05am on 06 May 2010, Cash Hughes wrote:

    I already got my email

    Posted 10:48; email 11:02; Rejected for spamming;
    (actually trying to fix a broken link, but what the heck...)

    Complain about this comment

  • 245. At 00:08am on 06 May 2010, Cash Hughes wrote:

    243. Ellis P Otter

    • "Return the sauce to the fire, thicken it with the butter-flour ball, and season it to taste with paprika. Pour the sauce over the meat and serve, with polenta and the side dishes you prefer"

    YUM!

    Complain about this comment

  • 246. At 00:19am on 06 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Duty Officer can't admit sillly mistake. It all get's escalated out of ocntrol later. This could end up in court ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 247. At 00:21am on 06 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    ocntrol (oxygen cannot neutralise) - of course I meant control

    Complain about this comment

  • 248. At 00:38am on 06 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Please, whoever is referring that recipe to the mods, explain youself. It's jolly frustrating being bullied by a stranger.

    Complain about this comment

  • 249. At 00:41am on 06 May 2010, GotToTheEnd wrote:

    Blow, hoped to get trhrough my sentence in the cooler without getting modded further.

    But I seem to have hit a hitch with my 11 on tonight's PM GB.

    Wanted to quote Arthur Lee at the end of my period of punitive handicap:

    Served my time

    Served it well.

    You made my soul

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XLq5bgVcOpM

    Write the rules

    In the sky

    but I've gone and bloggered it.

    What's more, I may have bloggered some sort of good behaviour option, too.

    Still, let's hear it for the Parole Board.

    Complain about this comment

  • 250. At 06:08am on 06 May 2010, lucien desgai wrote:

    Never mind, EtE, I'm sure it's for the best.

    Complain about this comment

  • 251. At 07:30am on 06 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Right I just do the washing up from last nights 'Stew' catering and I will be right there with the cross aunts, the coffee and all!

    ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 252. At 09:32am on 06 May 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    Horse@232: of course you did.

    Mmmm, coffee and cross aunts. Just what's required. Will leave a pot of home made marmalade on the bar should anyone wish to partake.

    Complain about this comment

  • 253. At 09:48am on 06 May 2010, The Intermittent Horse wrote:

    Lady Sue (262) - That that should surprise you, surprises me.

    Complain about this comment

  • 254. At 10:04am on 06 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 255. At 10:05am on 06 May 2010, Looternite wrote:

    My #254

    Sorry, Sorry wrong thread.

    Complain about this comment

  • 256. At 11:00am on 06 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Elevenses, tea and chocolate digestive, milk and plain. Not very exciting but kind of comforting.

    Anybody know where the Boy's Brigade Hall is? Just wondering ...

    Complain about this comment

  • 257. At 12:02pm on 06 May 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    Horse@253: I think my imaginotransference has been interrupted quite dramatically after reading that. In need of tea and chocolate digestive, thank Ellis.

    The Boy's Brigade Hall? A mile from the Girls Friendly Society Hall, most likely.

    Complain about this comment

  • 258. At 12:41pm on 06 May 2010, Cash Hughes wrote:

    256. Ellis P Otter

    • "Anybody know where the Boy's Brigade Hall is? Just wondering ..."


    Haven't you been offered a lift? I have, by a well-spoken recorded message,

    Beer and nuts in the lounge after 10 PM, all welcome.

    Complain about this comment

  • 259. At 1:48pm on 06 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    I am so embarrassed!

    Hey Ho, I quote from the conclusion of my correspondence with the various peeps at the Beeb whose cages I rattled this time:


    Dear Central Community Team,

    Okay, time for me to eat a large piece of humble pie. The BBC ID did indeed relate to a legacy email address from my old business in Africa.

    I apologise to all and sundry. You will find me on the naughty step.

    Kind regards,


    From: Central Communities Team [mailto:Central-communities-team@bbc.co.uk]
    Sent: 06 May 2010 13:27
    To:
    Subject: RE: What was wrong with this posting?

    The email address you have entered in your BBC iD account details is incorrect or no longer in use. You can check or update your email details by sign into your BBC iD and clicking on 'Settings'. The email address you are emailing from is not associated with a BBC iD.

    Complain about this comment

  • 260. At 4:32pm on 06 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Tea time, scones, jam and clotted cream.

    Everything served on the best bone china.

    Yummetty yum yum.

    Complain about this comment

  • 261. At 4:35pm on 06 May 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    Ellis, I'm intrigued. What was your "old business in Africa"?

    Complain about this comment

  • 262. At 4:36pm on 06 May 2010, Lady_Sue wrote:

    I'm going to have to stop eating more than I can lift.

    Complain about this comment

  • 263. At 4:40pm on 06 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    261: I think he did something medical, Lady Sue - See, Ellis, I do read your posts! ;o)

    Btw, Sue, have you checked your inbox?

    Complain about this comment

  • 264. At 4:44pm on 06 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    261 - Sue, assisting and developing conservation projects and efforts. All very wirthy and idealistic but, sadly, doomed to failure in the end.

    Complain about this comment

  • 265. At 4:47pm on 06 May 2010, Big Sister wrote:

    Duh! Got that wrong, didn't I, Ellis?

    Complain about this comment

  • 266. At 4:55pm on 06 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    265 - No Sis, I was trained as a paramedic but that was because I was living out in the bush far away from any hospitals or doctors and was regularly called in to emergency situations in the region.

    Complain about this comment

  • 267. At 6:13pm on 06 May 2010, Fifi wrote:

    I really must learn to say NO.

    I've just allowed myself to be persuaded to do a solo slot at 'that' punk festival in Norfolk, having attempted to cancel the band's planned appearance because we won't get enough rehearsal time before August.

    What. Have. I. Done.

    ;o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 268. At 6:34pm on 06 May 2010, Cash Hughes wrote:

    259. Ellis P Otter

    • "Hey Ho, I quote from the conclusion of my correspondence with the various peeps at the Beeb whose cages I rattled this time:"

    But did they satisfactorily explain the referrals?

    Complain about this comment

  • 269. At 6:57pm on 06 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    268 - Cash Hughes. No, but that was because I never got the email and so it could not be tracked back without effort. I did not consider it worth wasting licence payers money on saving a joke that somebody else, though irritating to me, had thought was in bad taste.

    Nuff said.

    So tonight I thought we'd call in the Cape wines to get us in tune for the coming festival to be known in Scotland as England's latest humiliation.

    Complain about this comment

  • 270. At 7:01pm on 06 May 2010, DiY wrote:

    Fifi 267!!

    Cancel?.....sob sob...so many Froggers flocking to Norfolk just to hear your dulcet tones (?).....don't even go there!!

    Catering is laid on.
    TV crews are briefed.
    Helicopter landing pad has been cleared just in case a certain Radio4 PM presenter wants to fly in.

    ;-)

    Complain about this comment

  • 271. At 7:14pm on 06 May 2010, Cash Hughes wrote:

    269. Ellis P Otter

    • "England's latest humiliation."

    I'll drink tae that!

    Slainte Mhor!

    Complain about this comment

  • 272. At 7:38pm on 06 May 2010, Fifi wrote:

    Fear not, dear Mr Nutt, there will be a mendacious celt at Skeyton. How dulcet the tones will be is open to doubt, but she'll be purveying her naughty repertoire of songs about the invulnerability of spiney animals at 2pm on Sunday 15th.

    Book now to avoid disappointment! ;o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 273. At 7:56pm on 06 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    Oh! the porcupine sonnet!

    Complain about this comment

  • 274. At 8:48pm on 06 May 2010, Fifi wrote:

    New verses are required, as I'm sick to the back gnashers of singing the same old 19 that already exist. Those who know the song, get cracking!

    Those who don't know the song, the format is this... (one word has been substituted so as not to cause the mods a dose of the vapours)

    * clears throat *

    It is said, if you try, you can [cuddle] the fly
    Or the swallow as it skims so skilfully by
    Use a noose or a net, or line (if you’ve the gall) 
    But the hedgehog can never be [cuddled] at all

    You can [cuddle] the ermine and all other vermin
    Like rats, mice and roaches, if you’re not discernin’
    You can [cuddle] the dog, it will come when you call 
    But the hedgehog can never be [cuddled] at all

    Right - go to it, my creative friends!

    ;o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 275. At 9:06pm on 06 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    274 - Fifi, for those cuddles, kisses would work and offend nobody.

    But I can't think of anything to follow ... yet

    Complain about this comment

  • 276. At 9:24pm on 06 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Lady Sue, Igor just complained about your attitude, he said you swore, I checked and it was a total misunderstanding. I explained to Igor that Jeeves is a term of great respect to a beloved retainer in RichLand.

    I think he might need an extra tip to placate him fully though ...

    Complain about this comment

  • 277. At 9:24pm on 06 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    Its really quite great to cuddle a hake.
    and you have to be keen to cuddle a bream
    To cuddle other aquatics may need acrobatics
    But the hedgehog can never be [cuddled] at all


    First attempt fifi

    Complain about this comment

  • 278. At 10:04pm on 06 May 2010, Ellis P Otter wrote:

    Please do not tip ash. Just tell your stories ...

    Complain about this comment

  • 279. At 10:05pm on 06 May 2010, Fifi wrote:

    I like it Stewart! Thank you very much.

    Ellis - the song, if taken literally, is much more unsavoury than THAT! But I look forward to additional verses if you're able to force one out for me...

    ;o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 280. At 10:34pm on 06 May 2010, Fifi wrote:

    The polling station people have left the voting booth behind. It folds up and can easily be carried. Any thoughts on what we might use it for on the Beach?

    Complain about this comment

  • 281. At 10:35pm on 06 May 2010, Stewart_M wrote:

    Will have a think of other animals. I take it that, basically, there has to be lots of strange cuddling options.

    Complain about this comment

  • 282. At 11:31pm on 06 May 2010, Fifi wrote:

    Well cuddle me, Stewart, no that's NOT it at all!

    ;o)

    Complain about this comment

  • 283. At 02:16am on 07 May 2010, GotToTheEnd wrote:

    You know what I think of markets, but I had a really good evening at my local hypermarket.

    For a start, yesteday I bought an evil looking curry and a cheesy nan from the 'Eat it before it rots' paupers' corner shelves.

    Trouble was when I got home (I rushed to catch a TV programme), I discovered they'd charged me the full whack, 1.97 more than they should have.
    Well, I was bushed and people were demanding supper. So the best I could do was to think vaguely about taking back a film cover with the new price on it, that had spent 10 minutes in the microwave and the nan wrapper. And that would have to be today.

    Well, it all seemed a bit desperate in the warm light but cold air of today. But eventually I did. And got my 1.97 back.

    Plus, one of those self-help machines was very rude to me, shouting irrelant things at me and insisting I put stuff in the bagging area when it was already there. So a member of staff put it down hard, knocking 50p off my bill to put it in its place. (All those machines are on profit-related bonus schemes)
    But the feisty thing wasn't finished yet. It petulantly insisted I get the staff member back to validate the 50p reduction.
    So the brave fellow doubled the penalty and I came away 2.97 up.

    Complain about this comment

View these comments in RSS

BBC iD

Sign in

BBC navigation

BBC © 2014 The BBC is not responsible for the content of external sites. Read more.

This page is best viewed in an up-to-date web browser with style sheets (CSS) enabled. While you will be able to view the content of this page in your current browser, you will not be able to get the full visual experience. Please consider upgrading your browser software or enabling style sheets (CSS) if you are able to do so.