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Not me guv.

Eddie Mair | 10:28 UK time, Thursday, 8 March 2007

Once again I get it in the neck for something I didn't do. I mean, I screw up enough without getting the blame for things I didn't do.

The marvellous Danny Savage interviewed "Cannabis Gran" last night. Rather well I thought. He didn't deserve...and I certainly didn't....this call to the Listener Log...

"Eddie Mair treated Patricia Tabram in the most appalling fashion. He was utterly rude to the lady. Who does he think he is talking to the woman like that? If that man had to spoke to me in that way, I would have had him arrested."

Caller, if you're reading this, please note: if you don't stop paying attention you buffoon, I'll have you arrested. And your radio taken away. And the tin foil removed from your head. And then send round Sheffield police.


  1. At 12:43 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Big Sister wrote:

    Hm, an ASBO for Eddie? Or a community sentence in a waste disposal unit with tacked on anger management course?

    How many coffees had you drunk before you wrote that? Or was it caffeine withdrawal?

    Nice of you to acknowledge your own fallibility, though.

  2. At 12:53 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Deepthought (John W) wrote:

    It's a sad state when there are people who are too stupid to own a radio...

    (I'm sure you all know the call centre/too stupid to own a computer transcript).

  3. At 12:56 PM on 08 Mar 2007, jonnie wrote:

    Eddie, any chance of posting it on the blog? Just to cheer us up!

    Or will you broadcast it on Friday?

  4. At 01:05 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Annasee wrote:

    Well pity the poor police, that's all I can say. I mean, here they are, arresting the cannabis gran, presumably under orders, to almost universal opprobrium. (sp?).

    Now, should they arrest:

    a) Danny Savage, for speaking to her in "such an appalling fashion" ? (not that I noticed)

    b) The listener, for libelling (slandering?)Eddie when it wasn't even him doing the interview?

    c) Eddie for threatening the said listener on the blog?

    d) Cannabis Gran for being nasty about the PM last night?

    e) Whoever sold Eddie his latest hit of espresso, when he was clearly already over the caffeine limit, & in no fit state to be unleashed on an unsuspecting public?

    f) All of the above?

  5. At 01:10 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Eddie Mair wrote:

    Jonnie (3), sorry to disappoint, the calls are taken not by us here but by a separate body. They send out a list of comments which we can all access on our internal computer system.

  6. At 01:11 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Belinda wrote:

    Eddie, it sounds like you need to ring up yesterday's interviewee (or, indeed, some froggers) and arrange for a little relaxing medication of your own. I am perfectly happy to send an innocent little plant to you.

    Although when I first read "Danny Savage", I immediately thought "Lily Savage". Not sure if there is any similarity between the two physically, but it may explain any perceived rudeness which may or may not have occurred.

    As to the Listener Log Lady: I can just imagine the police's reaction had she rung up her local office demanding that her interviewer be arrested for asking her some difficult questions.

  7. At 01:13 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Belinda wrote:

    Eddie, take my advice,
    Pull down your pants and slide on the ice.

  8. At 01:22 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Member of the Public wrote:

    Scenes of a Sheffield policeman repeatedly punching a woman are bound to shock the public. And it is right that, now in the public domain, the incident must be investigated in as public a manner as possible. I do hope the event will be kept in perspective.

    The incident happened late at night and involved a young woman who admits she was very drunk and cannot remember details. This lapse of memory may be due to an epileptic fit. It may also be due to the amount of alcohol she drank.

    What can be sure is that the incident was all in a night's work for Sheffield Police. They have to deal with this kind of unsavoury episode on a regular basis. Their reactions may seem excessive but now the incident is open to public scrutiny I hope the public examinations will be accepted... and that the incident will not be obscured by questionable claims of racial motives, which may well blur the search for the truth.

  9. At 01:26 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Annasee wrote:

    Gosh , speedy blog service at the moment! 10 mins? Must be the caffeine in the air.

    So, Eddie, if everyone can access the Listener Log comments, does that mean you felt the need to send an email around immediately saying "It wasn't even ME!" to everyone?

    Btw, your first sentence - I'm sorry, but that really is pure Eeyore. It's that "once again" that does it. Are you feeling put-upon today? Cheer up, I'm sure things can only get better!

  10. At 01:38 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Big Sister wrote:

    Belinda: What you're suggesting is ever so painful! ;o)

  11. At 01:52 PM on 08 Mar 2007, jonnie wrote:

    Re Eddie (5)

    Oh what a shame, I thought she must have left her comment on the interactive listener line.

    So if anyone else thought that Danny Savage had developed a Dundee accent last night:

    Please ring the Interactive listener line on :

    08703 66 66 76 (then we can all have a listen)

  12. At 02:02 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Big Sister wrote:

    Eddie MacAdamia:

    The lines to Sussex along which the newsletter slides are clearly rusty from all the recent rainfall.

    I can, however, report that it has finally arrived - 90 minutes after lift off from West London.

    Nuts? PM? Whatever next!

    Big Sis. With added Walnuts.

  13. At 03:13 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Thatcher Lott wrote:

    A big boy did it and ran away !! We believe you Eddie, even though we know you enjoy total Machavellian control of every aspect of the programme. By the way did you really mean to ask the caller to stop?? paying attention? Is this a major new BBC policy initiative - This is what we do - but don't worry about it !!

  14. At 03:14 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Deepthought (John W) wrote:

    This will not win me many friends, but hey, I've not got any as it is:

    Caller, if you're reading this, please note: if you don't stop paying attention you buffoon, I'll have you arrested. And your radio taken away.

    Surely, it should be ...please note: if you don'tstartpaying attention , you buffoon,....

  15. At 05:41 PM on 08 Mar 2007, jonnie wrote:

    Re: Deepthought (13)

    John, you pedant, you should share your gifts with us more. I've just visited your blog (by clicking on your name) and seen this lovely red cowslip:-


    You should have sent it to Eddie to publish, esp after the day he's had!

  16. At 05:41 PM on 08 Mar 2007, The Stainless Steel Cat wrote:

    On the Sheffield woman/police incident, is anyone else worried about an epileptic going to a nightclub? I'd have thought the lighting and suchlike was quite likely to trigger a fit. Or have I a wrong view of epilepsy?

  17. At 05:47 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Fearless Fred wrote:

    Don't fret, Eddie. It shows that some people (let's call them berks for want of a better term) just don't deserve to be taught how to turn on a radio. We on the frog know it wasn't you :-)

  18. At 06:08 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Jason Good wrote:

    Eddie, you naughty naughty boy.

    Fancy getting that nice man to agree to the "political correctness gone mad" comment. Do you get 10 bonus points in the office Interview Game?

  19. At 06:35 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Belinda wrote:

    Eddie, you bastard!

    Very good show, although I wonder how many complaints you'll get from Daily Mail readers about the language used. By the end, I could tell you were revelling in it.

    Very nice John Inman tribute as well - like you said, the actual words of the person are so much better than empty praise and meaningless impersonal anecdotes.

  20. At 07:06 PM on 08 Mar 2007, RJD wrote:

    Big Sister (10) - Should I surmise from the use of italics in your comment that you have actually tried this?

  21. At 07:26 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Humph wrote:

    SSC (16)

    I am afraid that you have got the wrong view of epilepsy. If you listen carefully to the warnings given on news programmes about "this report contains flashing lights" (which I think may be the source of your concern) you will hear that the said sufferers are a sub-set of the people who suffer from epilepsy. Epilepsy can be triggered by a number of stimuli. In my case, and yes I do "suffer", medical examinations failed to find the trigger. My condition is successfully controlled by medication and I have not had an incident for over 13 years now. However, the fact that I take medication does interefere with certain aspects of my work.


  22. At 10:02 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Val P wrote:

    RJD - don't ask! haven't we all?

  23. At 10:11 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Aperitif wrote:

    Sorry I missed all but the last ten minutes of the programme tonight -- Has the story that "Cannabis Gran" may now be evicted by her housing association gone national? The association has a no tolerence policy re illegal drugs so now that's she's been convicted... I believe the board were meeting today/tomorrow to consider whether to issue an eviction order. I'll post the next I hear.

  24. At 10:43 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Molly wrote:


    Not too keen on the chap, then!

    Get it off your chest- I would....


  25. At 10:58 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Big Sister wrote:

    RJD: In effect, yes. Though not as painful as the time I slide down a dry ski slope - that was hell on a stick!

  26. At 11:15 PM on 08 Mar 2007, RJD wrote:

    Val P (21) & Big Sis (24)

    I'm thinking about this. Either I don't get out often enough or I'm very lucky I stay in.

    Hmmm - I'm still thinking.

  27. At 11:41 PM on 08 Mar 2007, Gossipmistress wrote:

    I'm sure he's threatened to take someone's radio away before. He must have a big selection at home by now. Who will be left to listen if he keep confiscating them? We'll all have to go underground

  28. At 12:10 AM on 09 Mar 2007, Big Sister wrote:

    Believe me, RJD, you're better off away from the dry ski slopes. Once was enough for me. And my jeans. And my coxic. Makes me smart to think about it ....

    Incidentally, I had to smile the other day at the doctor's surgery. I've just been prescribed some corticosteroid cream. Sadly, the effects are very muted.

  29. At 08:35 AM on 09 Mar 2007, RJD wrote:

    Big Sis - "Sadly, the effects are very muted." implies that there are noticeable effects though.

    I'd ask for a stronger prescription or change your doctor

  30. At 08:54 AM on 09 Mar 2007, Val P wrote:

    Big Sis - remember, whatever you do, don't throw away whatever you have left after The Healing has Occurred, you will have a ready audience of at least 2 hovering over at Eb*y!

  31. At 09:08 AM on 09 Mar 2007, Big Sister wrote:

    RJD: It is effective for the condition for which it was prescribed. It does not, however, have any of the side effects I'd noticed when taking corticosteroids for another complaint. I think you'll remember hearing about the incident to which I refer! ;o)

  32. At 09:27 AM on 09 Mar 2007, Val P wrote:

    Big Sis - indeed we do, and await updates.

  33. At 10:44 AM on 09 Mar 2007, Aperitif wrote:

    Oops, I just complained on the "Cannabis Gran" thread about my post from last night not showing up... and here it is on the wrong thread... Well, if the blog weren't so fraught wth problems I wouldn't be so quick to blame it, would I? (Slinks away feeling embarrassed).

    P.S. You lot are obsessed with steroids.

  34. At 10:55 AM on 09 Mar 2007, RJD wrote:

    Big Sis - Oh, I DO remember. That's why I suggested the stronger prescription.

  35. At 11:27 AM on 09 Mar 2007, RJD wrote:

    Ap (33) - Not that long ago I was being accused of being obsessed with asteroids as well!

  36. At 11:54 AM on 09 Mar 2007, Annasee wrote:

    Big Sis - I don't remember! What happened? (if it's repeatable). If you need something stronger, I'm sure you could ask Gossipmistress for a prescription. There's probably something they use on horses...

    If we're talking medical - has anyone else experienced the new "Choose & Book" system? I had a 4 page letter from my Dr ( after I'd been to see her), telling me to make a phone apt at the clinic at a certain time (ie you have to phone them at that time.) You have a special 2 word password issued. Fantastic. Another password to add to all the rest. Then you make an appointment to be actually seen in person. After that you get a written confirmation (3 pages). I finally went to see someone yesterday! All for a bit of liquid nitrogen spray. I'm not sure how it has lessened either the paperwork or the general faffing about to get seen. And what is the "Choose" bit about? I don't care who I see, as long as it's close. I don't need a choice!

  37. At 01:55 PM on 09 Mar 2007, The Stainless Steel Cat wrote:

    Humph: Thanks for that, that's my New Fact for the day...

  38. At 07:02 PM on 09 Mar 2007, Aperitif wrote:

    RJD (35) Perhaps it was a combination of asses and steroids. Are you coveting your neighbour's steroids? Is the law an ass? Is it legal to covet an ass? Is it legal to convert an ass using steroids? So many questions...

    You'd think I'd had some wine, wouldn't you?...

  39. At 07:37 PM on 09 Mar 2007, RJD wrote:

    Ap - wine dear, me dear, you dear, yes dear.

    I'm off to the offie!

  40. At 08:17 PM on 09 Mar 2007, Humph wrote:

    But are, RJD (35), were you ever found guilty? Did the accusations ever actually lead to "a day in court"? Accusations are one thing (a number of things?) asteroids another (others?). But being drunk on a Friday evening, after a b*****d of a week (excuse my PM speak) is what I am (hic).


    If any of the above makes sense, then do not blame me. It was not my fault!

  41. At 01:01 AM on 11 Mar 2007, Aperitif wrote:

    Who was drinking you Humph?

  42. At 02:38 AM on 11 Mar 2007, Aperitif wrote:


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