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Eddie Mair | 12:45 UK time, Friday, 1 September 2006

As one or two bloggers have already observed - we had what Frank Spencer used to call a "little bit of bother" with our Satanic Charlotte clip. I'm sorry. We tried and have tried again - we think http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/news/pm/audio/satan.ram will work...

The truth is the only thing that's occupying our minds here in showbusiness is the imminent handover of the "Broadcasting House" torch this Sunday to Paddy O'Connell. Paddy was one of those who stepped into the breach when Fi Glover was fired, for stealing stationery. Now he's been rewarded with the programme as his own gig. Personally, I couldn't be more pleased. The whole thing's been going downhill since the days Alistair Cooke hosted. I was awful as his successor and Fi was an improvement, apart from the constant thieving.

I'm hoping that on Sunday there'll be a touching handover from Fi to P, as there was last night on the CBS Evening News. Recent host Bob Schieffer was joined on screen by the woman who'll take over next week, Katie Couric. There were kind words, some old clips, and then she made him cry! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtQgFoU9aPA If there's no blubbing on Sunday there'll be trouble.


  1. At 12:56 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Stephen, Leader of STROP wrote:

    Whoops, failed again try www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/news/pm/audio/satan.ram which worked for me

  2. At 01:00 PM on 01 Sep 2006, John W wrote:

    Still no joy on the audio clip...

    Figlover: Sob, only reason I got up on sun morning was to listen to her dulcet tones and mistakes...

  3. At 01:00 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    SB1 (wow!)

    OK Eddie, I promise to cry on Sunday, but only if you say "there there" in your most soothing tones on air for me this evening...

  4. At 01:02 PM on 01 Sep 2006, ohnonotagain wrote:

    Try this version of the link - more slashes, less dots.


  5. At 01:12 PM on 01 Sep 2006, John W wrote:

    All I get is "Sata.."

  6. At 01:15 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Jean Allison (Mrs) wrote:

    Does Eddie Mair have his name on a tea cup?

  7. At 01:23 PM on 01 Sep 2006, David McNickle wrote:

    My attorney will be in touch.

  8. At 01:23 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Jezetha wrote:

    Britons don't blub - that's why I like them. The day they start doing that, the UK will really be a part of the United States...

  9. At 01:25 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:


    John W (3)

    Figlover??? - Fig Lover?

    Ho hum, too much time on my hands today.

    btw, I imagine Eddie has "How YOU doin'?" a la Joey Tribianni on his mug...

  10. At 01:25 PM on 01 Sep 2006, David McNickle wrote:

    Jean Allison,
    If his name is PG Tips, he does.

  11. At 01:27 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Refus T. Firefly wrote:

    Don't come cryin' to me, my friend,
    Don't come cryin' to me,
    You only reap the crop you sow,
    So don't come cryin' to me.

  12. At 01:30 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Jonathan Perry wrote:

    Loved the CBS handover clip -- Patrick Moore and his monocle !!:-)

  13. At 01:33 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Michelle wrote:


    This one works for me!


  14. At 01:37 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Bonnie Dundee wrote:

    What ever happened to that nice Radio 4 announcer Eugene Fraser he'd a lovely soothing voice. He could say Dogger Bank like no other.

  15. At 01:37 PM on 01 Sep 2006, incognito wrote:

    Lovely, I feel I can lower the bar and join in. Eddie has learnt a thing or two about blogging. Asking a direct question of his readers is a sure-fire way to engage and thus further our input.

    What do I do whilst listening to PM? Great, here goes:

    5PM and I hit the work door like I'm Carl Lewis (that's a sort of hip-hop quote/pastiche). Then I'm in the car and fired up for a bit of the old Mair charm. Waiting for the well hidden blade (glinting amongst the folds of the smoking jacket) to be put to good use on an unsuspecting interviewee. I also enjoy waiting for the "we did contact ____ to come onto the show but they declined (due to dog dying, falling under a bus, sexual favours were being given and they were otherwise engaged) or gave a statement”

    The journey takes just short of 25 minutes. Upon arrival the radio in the kitchen is put on (as is the kettle) whilst I make own quintessential cup of tea (loose and mixed with a certain magic ingredient, providing a strong and rounded cup of the most English of comforters) that cannot be achieved by the awful teabag.

    With the tea on the table and cooling in readiness to be drunk, I may eat a banana or two (don’t like them) whilst considering a squash match. I am obsessed by squash and I just let the rest of PM wash over me whilst drifting off into replaying previous matches and wondering how I am to approach the forthcoming game.

    Yes, the fast lane is difficult to get a handle on but PM manages to keep my feet firmly on the ground.

  16. At 01:39 PM on 01 Sep 2006, John W wrote:

    Got it!. What a plalver, though.

    I'd've thought, Eddie, you'd arrange for Fi to hand the torch to Paddy this evening, with you as Master of Ceremonies, tears all round, and all of PM listening (and it can then be repeated on Sun morning for the BH-ers who don't hear PM.

  17. At 01:40 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Bella wrote:

    I can't hear the clip either, all I get is a very nice-sounding woman (not Charlotte, tho :( ) saying "sorry we can't bring you the programme [??! sic] you requested". And what's happened to the crap clip? I can't seem to get the August posts before the 31st.

  18. At 01:43 PM on 01 Sep 2006, John W wrote:


    Figlover = Fi Glover - you missed the BH newsletter

  19. At 01:43 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Bella wrote:

    Ok, Ben's link with the extra slashes worked. Still can't get the crap, though :))

  20. At 01:45 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Bella wrote:

    ok, found the crap as well, forget both my previous posts! sorry for taking up your time ;)

  21. At 01:46 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Mark Drew wrote:

    Satanic Charlotte clip. - it worked it made the cat and I jump out of our skins after such a long wait and the volume on max it got us.

    Regarding the living epitaph I wonder if Eddie will be around to hear his.

  22. At 01:51 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Sara wrote:

    Why no strapline today? And why does the header say that an error occurred while processing this directive? What directive? What error? I think someone should be told (but not me, because I probably won't understand it).

  23. At 02:01 PM on 01 Sep 2006, John W wrote:

    Sara, Good point, I'd not noticed the no strap line (which is what that error message is all about). Someone must have forgotten that the months change...

    Let Lissa go on holiday, and by day two the place is in chaos...will Eddie get to the mic at all tonight...

    Now got crap and satan as my "you've got mail" clips. No-one's told me I cannot, and I have asked.

  24. At 02:04 PM on 01 Sep 2006, James Farnell wrote:

    Sarah at 21,

    I've noticed the error message too. Perhaps Eddie pushed the wrong button. He should check the instructions on the box lid.

  25. At 02:07 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Susan Wakefield wrote:

    What am I doing at 5pm? Waiting for it to be half past 5 so I can get in the car and listen to the remaining half hour of PM. Apart from today when I will be listening to the whole show (apart from the time it takes to get from the office to the car and the car to the house) as I'm by myself in the office and can have the radio on!

    Tea & biscuits at half past 3 if anyone wants to join me.

  26. At 02:18 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Michael Mills wrote:

    Aunty BBC's censor seem to have stepped in. "Sorry we can't bring you the programme you requested".

  27. At 02:24 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Mark Drew wrote:

    Pssssst Hey Eddie just found the place for you http://www.seomoz.org/blogdetail.php?ID=1347 21 Tactics to increase Blog Traffic
    Just what you need. Tactic 9 invite guest bloggers now there is a thought. You let us contribute to the header at the top of the blog what about the bye line?

  28. At 02:25 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    SB25. For the benefit of, well, no-one really. Here is what I tried to post in response to ‘test 2’ a couple of hours ago:


    I’m afraid you may just have failed that test...

    Take three twice a day, or is it two three times a day?

    SB1 - surely not)

    incognito (14) - The magic ingredient would be the hot water, surely?

    “Straplines are for those lesser shows”

  29. At 02:26 PM on 01 Sep 2006, tobias wrote:

    'Lissa'. Is that the same as 'Lisa' but pronounced with a speech impediment?

  30. At 02:29 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Maurice wrote:

    At 5 o'clock, one will be listening to ones Ipod on shuffle. This ok with you Eddie, or what?

  31. At 02:43 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Mike wrote:

    Hey you lot - I've played that Satanic thing over the office tannoy system. It caused pandemonium. Brilliant!

  32. At 02:44 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Joel Hammond-Turner wrote:

    Can we have an ipod-friendly MP3 version available for download over plain old HTTP please for those of us that have to endure nasty corporate firewall policies that prevent us revelling in such audible delights?


    (ask an adult to help you with the difficult bits, if you need! ;-) )

  33. At 03:11 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Will Tucker wrote:

    Hello all,

    I have forecome to the daily temptation to witness this afternoon internet revolution. Now as I sit in reception in some boring, white and beige, county council building "doing" some temp "work" between my holidays (as a student) i am so glad that i have (ish). Only ish because i suspect I might get found out if i suddenly let Charlotte rip accross the echoing atrium therefore i have not been able to utilise the full content of todays blog- lets have something a bit more subtle for monday for all of us bunking student temps. Thanks

  34. At 03:23 PM on 01 Sep 2006, John W wrote:

    (I forgot to point out that if Fi hands over the Patrick tonight, then all three BH presenters [other than stand-ins], with Eddie as Master of Ceremonies will be together for the hand-over). After all, Patrick will be there for his preview tonight, why not bring Fi along...

    The Drum-roll, the music, the tears, the "I want to thank my parents, my cat..."....

  35. At 03:28 PM on 01 Sep 2006, David McNickle wrote:

    So what was all that business that took place when Di died? If that wasn't blubbing, then I don't know blubbing.

  36. At 03:28 PM on 01 Sep 2006, John W wrote:

    I've got the "crap", and now "satan" as mp3, but don't want to get in trouble with Aunty Beeb by posting it for download, unless they let me. I blogged and wrote in and asked Eddie and Lissa, but reply there was none...

    Tobias, Lissa blogged that she was named after the dutch town of Lisse. (Day 2, I think).


  37. At 03:31 PM on 01 Sep 2006, John W wrote:

    Ah, 3:30, time for tea and bickies with Susan (#26).


  38. At 03:31 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Fearless Fred wrote:

    You know what? I think the error message IS the strapline.... It's all very subliminal


  39. At 04:03 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Tom Harrop wrote:

    Mr McNickle (number 35),

    I think you'll find that all that "blubbing" over Diana's death was mainly done by foreigners and London tourist who lined the streets to throw flowers all over the place. A pointless feeble exercise adopted so often by Continentals over the years.

    We real Brits just got on with it - immersed in own thoughts. However, I suspect those few Brit's who did happen to cave in, at the time, feel rather foolish now. No doubt blushing when they recall how they behaved on that regrettable day.

  40. At 04:08 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Ed Iglehart wrote:

    Does this link work?
    Just testing.

  41. At 04:39 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Crai9 wrote:

    todays listener tagline thing says:

    an error occurred while processing this directive

    wow, that's the best one yet.

  42. At 05:03 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Phil wrote:

    I've watched to your Bob Schieffer, Katie Couric clip. It opens with Bob telling us that Katie is going to be a permanent fixture in the new office. I can't help wondering what is meant by "Permanent fixture"?

  43. At 05:22 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Jezetha wrote:

    @David McNickle (36). Oops, you're certainly right there! It slipped my mind... The British upper lip more than twitched in 1997 (I know, I was there at the funeral of 'Lady Di', all the way from Amsterdam, accompanying a sister who completely identified with her...) But since then, the upper lip has stiffened again, I think...

  44. At 05:30 PM on 01 Sep 2006, David McNickle wrote:

    My attorney just took delivery of a large amount of stationery, so you will be hearing a lot from him.

  45. At 05:39 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Jezetha wrote:

    Tom Harrop, #40 - I hadn't read your contribution, with those 'blubbing Continentals', when I wrote my latest post (it hadn't appeared on my screen yet), so - rejoice! I have unwittingly confirmed your analysis... Greetings from Delft.

  46. At 06:01 PM on 01 Sep 2006, David McNickle wrote:

    Tom (40),
    I replied to your post but it disappeared. I think because I used a word beginning with B and ending with X which is apparently a no no.
    Basically I said that that great American Elton John blubbed all over the place when Di died. PYOOOOOOK!

  47. At 06:23 PM on 01 Sep 2006, andycrafi wrote:

    Isn't Fi going to be doing the New Home Truths?

  48. At 07:50 PM on 01 Sep 2006, Valery Pedant wrote:

    Hey, just got back (work called me OUT of the house today) and couldn't let a day go by without joining in

    Sadly I can't get any of the links to work as my volume seems to have disappeared. I can see Katie Couric, but not hear her, perhaps for the best. Problem is I can't hear Charlotte....

    andycrafi, where did you hear that? 48

    Hi to the lots of new folks today btw

    SB49 (Fair chance I would say, at 19.50?)

  49. At 10:08 PM on 01 Sep 2006, andycrafi wrote:

    It was on some obscure BBC news page, and all over the HT message board. Not many people like her on that board, unfortunately. So I'm not giving the link. I haven't heard Fi yet so I'm not going to judge.

    Go Fi!

  50. At 12:45 AM on 02 Sep 2006, Valery Pedant wrote:

    Is that: not many people LIKE her, or not many people like HER?

    SB51 By hook or by crook I'll be last in this - erm- blog. No that doesn't work too well

  51. At 01:45 AM on 02 Sep 2006, Rufus A Bairzarce wrote:

    (sb 52 - got to be. Sorry, VP, but I'm full of self importance, amongst other things.)
    (Apols if you read this elsewhere)

    I say, you chaps!
    I have been desperately uncomfortable because I couldn't achieve crap, and felt lonely without Satan's homosexual lover.
    I am more accustomed to encountering and causing problems than I am to solving them, but ...
    You are about to experience a(n) unique event.
    Eventually, I realised that I hadn't sought an update for Realplayer since I got this pc. (It's clockwork - so that will give you some idea.) I hied me away and loaded up the new version, which I think is v.X. My old one was about v.VII.
    I can now enjoy crap and satan's lover whenever I wish.
    At the risk of teaching my grandma to suck eggs, you can get the free Realplayer from:
    or you can open the Realplayer application and update from there, but be careful you don't choose the "purchase" version, unless you really want it.
    Happy listening.

  52. At 12:19 PM on 02 Sep 2006, Valery Pedant wrote:

    Thanks Rufus - for full details of Fun I Had Whilst Downloading, see Try This Other Thing (or whatever the other Blog was called yesterday). Tried to check it and lost what I'd started to post here...Losing the will to live now - or is that the hangover?

  53. At 12:54 PM on 02 Sep 2006, Rufus A Bairzarce wrote:

    Reading these in the wrong order. Never could get the hang of geography so I've no chance with cybergraphy.
    I posted a "sorry" for following your hook/crook attempt, don't know where it went.

  54. At 01:10 PM on 02 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Fancy not getting to look at this until Saturday! Anyway, if anyone else comes back to this one at such a late stage, I have a question: Does anyone know who all of the "crap" voices are, in order (or where I can find out)? Bit of a heated discussion going on here..

    btw, John W (19), er, no I didn't - that was kind of my point... :)

  55. At 02:04 PM on 02 Sep 2006, Valery Pedant wrote:

    Oddly enough - I was thinking that one over again just last night, Aperitif. Y'see I posted one particular suggestion twice, and each time, the post disappeared (spooky or am I wearing my paranoid hat?). To give the b of the d it was during a particularly frantic period of comments disappearing and re-appearing (early days - Lissa-with-an-a weeping and wailing etc ),I can't help wondering though if they just didn't like my suggestion (or me) (- truly paranoid now). I won't say it again here..but it was a suggestion for the fourth one in on the left.... can't think why she would have complained though.

  56. At 02:25 PM on 02 Sep 2006, Valery Pedant wrote:

    Posted a comment on this, Aperitif, about 15 mins ago and it hasn't appeared yet??

    SB56, or 57 if they do post my previous (which had no names in it - honest guv)

  57. At 02:54 PM on 02 Sep 2006, Valery Pedant wrote:

    Seem to be a lone attendee this afternoon (too wet for weeding). However I must eat my words anyway - the missing one returned! I know not when. 34 on Crap if you're interested in my thoughts A?

    Anyone else have any ideas?

  58. At 05:13 PM on 02 Sep 2006, David McNickle wrote:

    The 'crap' discussion started out on 18 August, if that's what you mean.

  59. At 05:54 PM on 02 Sep 2006, David McNickle wrote:

    Does anybody else click on the blog and occasionally get Moveable Type Publishing Platform instead? Is Fi branching out with her stationery business? I think Eddie should be told.

  60. At 07:06 PM on 02 Sep 2006, Valery Pedant wrote:

    What is Moveable Type Publishing Platform, and is it an improvement on his shorter Blogs?

    btw I keep meaning to ask, what are HTML tags and why should I have to be more stylish? (see left of box)

    Did anyone else hear Ned Sherrin on L E tonight and his comments on the Best PM Poll - we laughed and laughed. Not sure how he gets away with it....

    SB61, roll on Monday

  61. At 09:23 PM on 02 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    Quite simply, HTML tags can be used to make text bold, or italic, or underlined, and so on. Also, they allow you include web links, e-mail links, or even...

  62. At 09:27 PM on 02 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:


  63. At 09:38 PM on 02 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    · perhaps images are stretch to far in this arena ·

    © Raceline Photography

  64. At 10:00 PM on 02 Sep 2006, Dr Hackenbush wrote:

    Perhaps images can not be made to appear here.

  65. At 10:57 PM on 02 Sep 2006, Valery Pedant wrote:

    Indeed perhaps it would seem not. The rest is clever though - you learn something every day on Eric's Blog : )

  66. At 09:25 AM on 03 Sep 2006, David McNickle wrote:

    Has the Moveable Type thing appeared on your computer? Maybe it is a kind of pop-up.

    Speaking of Ned Sherrin, weren't those Puppini Sisters great? You should listen to the bit of Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy on
    I must buy their CD.

  67. At 12:50 PM on 03 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Re 56, 57 & 58, Thanks, Valery P (or Valery H, as I see you were previously known). I didn't join in this whole blog thing until this week being, first, away on holiday and then, trying really, really hard not to get involved, I read but didn't post... resistence was useless: The mere cyberspace proximity to the adorable Eddie finally pulled me in... But I digress. I'm with you on the 4th one - defintely, but none of you lovely people seem to have posted a full, definitive list (unless I skipped past it accidentally). I do realise I shouldn't be spending my time arguing about crappers' identities with fellow PM fans, but ought to be getting on with my own life but an addict has to have her fix...

    I didn't get Rufus A B's HM reference either - so I'm glad you asked. Actaully I still don't - unless the queen (I refuse to capitalise) was really 53 in 1953? Have I not got the right mindset or am I being incredibly thick? (Please be gentle), A, x.

  68. At 10:02 PM on 03 Sep 2006, Nigel N. wrote:

    Apertif, my son reports that it was the queen mum that was 53 in 1953.

    Valery, a silly question, but do you live in Leicester?

  69. At 11:24 PM on 03 Sep 2006, Valery Pedant wrote:

    David (67), yes they are very good at what they do, but I can't decide whether I like them or not! The Andrews sisters take me back to my childhood, and that's not always a good idea. Shades of that BFPO programme that used to be on Sunday lunchtimes, near Movie-go round and the Navy Lark, what was it called? Cliff Michelmore and his wife in different countries doing requests, was it?

    Very clever Aperitif (68), how did you deduce that I am one and the same? Ah but you just have to get involved dontcha? Eddie casts a sort of Magic Dust about and it draws you in? Or is that just me? Glad you agree about JB, and no, no-one seems to have postulated a complete list, or even any other suggestions. I had decided that there was some sort of embargo going on..I'll listen again though, and we could just swap suggestions between oursleves - if no-one else is interested that is??

    Had thought about Rufus T's post long and hard, and had decided I was being obtuse, but was more than happy to go with it, very kind of him to comment at all sort of thing. Being not from Leicester (sorry Nigel N(69), but thanks for asking), but from Embra, capital of Mairland - I thought that was the "capital" reference because she trolls around here a fair bit, on holiday etc. The thing is of course that the parents bought a TV just in time for the coronation (small c) and then to distract then from/during my birth, so just guess what my middle name is? (no it's not Lord Reith).

    SB 69 (Why Leicester, I'm intrigued?)

  70. At 12:45 AM on 04 Sep 2006, Rufus A B wrote:


    Valery P
    Sorry, Hen, (is that acceptable in Edimbra?)
    Originally Forces' Favourites later (now seems a double entendre) Two Way Family Favourites with Jean Metcalfe, following Billy Cotton's Band Show.

  71. At 09:39 AM on 04 Sep 2006, Valery Pedant wrote:

    Yes, yes of course, Rufus, Two Way Family Favourites! (You're right of course, they'd never be able to call it that now). Jean M was married to Cliff Mich. wasn't she? Ah the Billy Cotton Band Show "Wikey,Wi-ikey" - I can hear it now. Radio's answer to the Black and White Minstrel Show - no, not the answer, because it came first...the question?

    Wasn't Jimmy Clitheroe somewhere in that time slot too? Maybe even Archie Andrews and Brough too? Or am I telescoping the whole of the Light Programme into Sunday mornings? The old memory plays tricks these days.....


  72. At 12:07 PM on 04 Sep 2006, John W wrote:

    I had the moveable type page come up once - when trying to blog Eddie that his links were not working for the Satanic clip. I would think it is connected with the company that provides this blog (someone said it was an external company early on).

    As for the html tags, it seems limited.

    <i>italic</i> gives you italic

    substitute b for bold, u for underline, the code for links can be done, but anything else seems to be stripped out (so no font colours, images... )

  73. At 10:49 AM on 06 Sep 2006, Aperitif wrote:

    Thanks Nigel N (69) - I geddit now.

    Valery P (70) we had a bit of an argument here, but I'll do my best to narrow down our (my actual flesh chum and I) list and post it - you could tell me whether you agree? Will talk to her and come back later.

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