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Paper Monitor

14:36 UK time, Friday, 14 December 2012

A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.

The male anatomy is in the spotlight today. Both youthful and aged.

The Sun splashes on the story of Justin Bieber's testicles.
"Kidnap gang in plot to castrate Bieber". Inside there's more. "$2,500 bounty on each Bieber testicle".

Paper Monitor is feeling a little delicate today so can't go into the gory details. But in the interests of public calm, it's worth repeating the reassuring words of Bieber's manager Scooter Braun: "We take every precaution to protect and ensure the safety of Justin and his fans." Good to know that Scooter's on the case. But the mind boggles about those precautions. Reinforced steel underpants?

A rather older man gets glowing coverage for a different part of the body. The Times devotes most of page four to 68-year-old Roger Daltrey's chest.

The lead singer of The Who arrived on stage at Madison Square Garden looking dapper. Until, that is, he began to disrobe.

"The jacket did not last and the shirt opened gradually from the neck, as if the garment itself were compelled to make way for what lay beneath. There, glistening in the lights, was a tanned, hairless torso, the plate-like outline of pectorals and an abdomen still bearing the remnants of a six-pack."

Author of the piece, Will Pavia, can't resist the chance to revisit the band's most famous hit.

"This was a man who had expressed, again and again, the hope that he would die before he got old. Several decades on, he was still alive and his chest was still young."

If Justin Bieber keeps everything intact...there's hope for the lad.

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