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Paper Monitor

13:13 UK time, Thursday, 22 November 2012

A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.

All good things must come to an end. Some when they've barely started, covered in lice with a mouthful of ostrich anus.

Paper Monitor speaks, of course, of Nadine Dorries who has said goodbye to her jungle friends after being voted off I'm A Celebrity.

Let us mark this solemn occasion by reflecting on the press's farewell to the Honourable Member for Mid-Bedfordshire.

"Ready to face the music, Nadine?" asks the Daily Mail.

The Daily Star stirs things up. "Jungle Nadine: Helen Is Faking It!" a shocking suggestion that "soap babe" Helen Flanagan might be hamming it up to win over the viewers.

Punning wins out at the Daily Mirror. "Go, Nad! MP gets boot". The paper quotes her telling Ant and Dec: "I actually came here slightly self-important, but I completely found myself."

Ah, bless, Paper Monitor loves a happy ending.

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