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Paper Monitor

11:10 UK time, Wednesday, 12 October 2011

A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.

Another day, another study, another set of remarkable findings and another exercise in how to sell a story.

Scientists at the University of Stirling in Scotland have studied women on the pill and come to some conclusions, the main one being that females using such contraception subconsciously pick less sexy but more reliable men to have relationships with.

The Daily Mirror's headline reads: A BITTER PILL. It starts its story with an opening line that declares:

"Dull sex and break-ups are in store for women on the Pill."

Interestingly, the findings suggest that women on the pill have relationships that last on average two years longer than women who are not. But the newspaper says they are more sexually dissatisfied, according to the study, so that could trigger a break-up - couldn't it?

In the Daily Telegraph things are presented rather differently. Its headline reads: "Pill may lead to happy marriage". The suggestion that those relationships might be less sexually satisfying doesn't automatic mean the end of a marriage for this paper. It's more of the keep calm and carry on sort.

Maybe Suzi Godson sums it up best in the Times . She analyses the research done, as she puts it, by the "University with too much money". Her conclusion? Focus your attention on something else rather than "trying to establish tenuous but headline-grabbing links between hormones and relationship behaviours".

Now, what the heck is going on in Cumbria? Its clouds are getting really rather creative this week. When it comes to random look-alikes in strange places, food usually serves up the best. How can we forget the face of Jesus in a tortilla and the Virgin Mary in a watermelon.

But today alone the papers have two cloud formations in Cumbria, both looking like something familiar. Firstly, the Daily Telegraph has clouds in Maryport looking like a eagle soaring through the sky. But paper Monitor's favourite is a picture of some fluffy things in the Carlisle sky looking like a gigantic pig. As the Sun puts it - pigs will fly.

Still nowhere near as good as the house that looks like Hitler though.

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