A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Ouch. No one likes to be told they're too old. Especially not on the front pages of the newspapers. But that's what David Beckham has woken up to this morning.
Asked if the former England captain would be part of his plans for the Euro 2012 qualifiers, England Manager Fabio Capello replied:
"I say thank you very much for helping me at the World Cup but he is probably a little too old"
You'd think Fabio would know by now to put a call in to the player in question before making annoucements about them on live television - especially when it's about Golden Balls. It would seem he doesn't and his comments dominate the front pages of the Sun and the Times.
It has not gone down well. The Times says his "judgement and management skills" are being called into question again. The Mirror calls Capello "bungling" and asks: "Did you not learn ANYTHING from that World Cup disaster?" If you thought the nation would forgive and forget Fabio, here's your answer.
Silly season alert. It's that time of year when real news is thin on the ground, so other news - if you can call it that - makes the papers. The results of two informative research studies - yes, that is a shovel load of sarcasm you detect - make the Sun today. To sum up, men watch a lot of football during their lifetime (1,100 days apparently) and women spend a month longer going to the loo over a lifetime than the male of the species. Well, who'd have thought it?
Just as surprising - Paper Monitor's eyebrows are raised again - are the pictures of Wag Abbey Clancy having a heart-to-heart with her mum, following allegations about her boyfriend, England and Spurs striker Peter Crouch.
Most of us turn to our mum for support during hard times, we just don't do it walking down a beach in a skimpy bikini, long blonde hair blowing in the gentle breeze - mum included.
For the rest of us, it usually involves sitting on a settee, red-eyed, with a box of tissues nearby to blow our runny nose.