A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
It's been too, too long since the Independent featured a sad-eyed dolphin on its front page. But that doesn't stop Paper Monitor hankering after the good old days, especially when the Indy teasingly squeezes a marine creature onto page one. Only it's not a dolphin. And it appears to be in quite a perky mood.
Also confounding expectations is the Daily Telegraph. It gives over its front page "bronzed filly" slot to a bronzed corporal (reproduced right).
It seems disrespectful to note that he is topless, given that the MoD is trying to claw back most of his compensation for being shot in Iraq. But topless he is. Not even the Sun runs the photo as large as the Telegraph.
There is a topless man, too, on the front page of the Daily Mail (and inside the Express). But he is not as bronzed or as photogenic as the hero soldier. It is Jack Nicholson, heaving himself aboard a speedboat in the south of France. But at least his swimwear holds up to the task, unlike the "go faster" suit worn by the swimmer in today's quote.
And finally, the Guardian also puts a topless swimmer on page one, and he too is a picture - well, his face is a picture.
Grimacing in disbelief, eight-times Olympic gold medallist Michael Phelps emerges from the pool after being beaten for the first time since 2005.
"What, I lost?" is the headline.