Your article on Christmas dinner states we, assuming you meant UK, eat 15,000 tonnes of Brussels each year. As an average sprout weighs 1/4 of an ounce (yes, I did weigh them) that equates to 141096 per tonne. Now if you apply the simple formula of ((sprouts per tonne * 15000) / 60,776,238 (uk populate)) then I only get to eat 0.02 sprouts with my christmas dinner. Oh well, at least it will reduce my carbon footprint.
Bryan Poor, Oxford
Anyone else think the new species of dinosaur still looks remarkably like a T-Rex?
Tom Webb, Epsom, UK
Vernon Coaker says "In the wrong hands, samurai swords are dangerous weapons". And in the right hands, they are absolutely lethal. Not much wiggle room then.
With reference to the news story about Liverpool football players being burgled. One player burgled, two players burgled, three, four etc. Forgive me but am I the only one to see a pattern emerging here? Please don't tell me the police haven't spotted this and weren't watching Steve Gerard's or any of the other player's houses? Shame on you!
"What erudition, what elan, what brio, what panache." What Paper Monitor failed to spot is that "exterminate" and "minogue" also have an "i" and and "n" in common. And - crucially - they all come in the same order. I'll get my scarf.
Ruaraidh Gillies, Wirral, UK
The BBC has had a fantastic day with puns as well.
Christian Haythorn, Manchester
Paper Monitor's brief tour of some of the puns in today's papers reminds me of the man who entered a punning competition run by his local newspaper. He sent 10 puns, hoping that at least one would win, but no pun in ten did.
Adam, London, UK