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How is the communication important for the couple life?

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Sophea Sophea | 10:51 UK time, Saturday, 1 October 2011

"Chum Reap Sour everybody. " Please let me introduce myself; my name is Touch Sophea - I am from Cambodia. I am a 31 year old woman living in Phnom Penh, the capital city of the Cambodia. I am married with a two year old son named Joshua. In my family, I am the first born child and I am also the first to be a mother. I work with a Non-government (NGO) as a Child Protection technical officer. I am delight to work with children and youth to see to them grow and become a role model. In this month's blog, I would like to introduce you to the Cambodian rural experience where I work and explain to you how women and men communicate in the rural countryside...

To begin, I am writing this blog during Puchum Ben, a Buddhist holiday. This year, my husband and I decided to stay at home to relax and enjoy the weather after long days working. How nice just stay at home and read book or doing gardening work. There are five coconut trees and two mongo trees and orchids inside my land. I love doing home gardening during the holiday but recently haven't enough time to do it.

Let me talk about Communication in Cambodian families between husbands and wives. I am curious about the Communication between husbands and wives. How is the communication important for the couple life? The communication in Cambodian couples is weak. Through my personal and professional experiences, I have noticed that most Cambodian couples are reluctant to openly express their needs to each other. Because they are so busy earning money to support their families, most of the topics they discuss are about finance or business. Conversation between husbands and wives is a critical necessity needed to improve the couple's relationship; husbands and wives need to communicate their needs in order to resolve such conflict within a household setting, yet this is not widely practiced within Cambodian culture. We can open the discussion on the communication. How is important for the family relationship even for the every day life. It is an interested topic that wants to explore and share to my community.


I am finishing the first blog being throwing the question what do you think about the communication between husbands and wives? Do you think that communication is so important in the relationship? How do you do to improve it? How do we help the couple to improve their communication? I hope all of you enjoy my next posting. Thanks a lot for your time reading my first entry.

Comments

  • Comment number 1.

    Hi Touch Sophea,
    Thanks for share with us your experiences in Cambodia and welcome.I did really enjoyed reading your blog and from now, you have a fan in Colombia.
    Communication between husband and wife are important -the most-just to keep the marriage alive through the years.However,failures in the comunication between couples is the´ big issue´ not only in Cambodia.
    Somebody will have a solution for?Sometimes I´m wondering if that ´failure´ is inherent to our own mankind.
    All the best,
    Alfonso

  • Comment number 2.

    Hallo Sophea,

    this is the first time that I write a comment on a blog. Your topic communication between wives and husbands touches my sore spot. I ve recently separated from my husband and I m still very sad about it. In my opinion, communication is the most important thing at all in a relationship. But not only about the finances, the business or how to do things well. That s only one side. And it s not enough. You can speak with your hands and eyes, too, and I think, that can show, how deep a couple is connected with each other during understanding and feelings. So they show, that the partner is his or her joy in life. And if one of them had a bad day, how the partner reacts: showing understanding for the situation and help to relax. I ve experienced that this is so difficult and you have to work on it every day.

    I wish you the best in this blog!

    Love, Mairi

  • Comment number 3.

    Hi dear Sophea
    Nice to meet you . Welcome to BBC LE . What a great pleasure to know your country you and your life as a working mum . I think you are lucky to work as a Child Protection technical officer . I love children and I love more to work with them ! Your first Blog subject is so moving . AS you said effective relation between couples is so vital . I think we know it but we forget it or we neglect it in our every day life . One of it's reason might be long working hours now a days . Actually there is no time to have a nice chit chat with each other in evening . You may laugh some times we have to just talk in our driving time ! The situation is worth for working mums , those women have to keep up every day chore in a short time after work before sleep time !Thank you to remind us such an important issue . I 'm looking forward your next articles !
    Enjoy your holiday
    Pary from Iran

  • Comment number 4.

    Good evening Sophea! I'am enjoying your first blog which vives me some sights about your country and relation ammong couples ;I look forward to laern more about culture and costomes in your homeland .
    Good luck
    abousamir Morocco

  • Comment number 5.

    I don't know if here in Italy there are many problems about communication between wife and husband... I suppose it's so, considering today household violence is unfortunately a serious problem yet. However, my wife and I don't have any problems at all, because to communicate each other is the pillar of our relationship: she speaks all the day and all the day (and at night too) I only have to listen to her... You know, if I want to speak, I have to lift and shake my hand!
    Only joking, Sophea... I believe there isn't a very relationship without communicating, even though wife and husband can communicate not only talking: glances and acts are sometimes more important than words.
    Sergio

  • Comment number 6.

    Hi everyone
    I'm so sorry for posting this comment in this but I couldn't find the right one to give my question. please help me! I've just joined BBC blog and I don't know how to use it. please direct me the way to post my entry? I really wanna to share you.
    Thank you all so much and sorry about the convenience
    Love you all :X

  • Comment number 7.

    Hi Sophea, welcome.
    Comunication, good topic. You have spoken about comunication of wathever situation could be lived by the couple, but I've liked a lot the comment of Mairi. What about with sights, touches, silences, gestures.......? The non verbal comunication is more important in a couple than the verbal. I don't know what do you think?
    See you,
    Toni

  • Comment number 8.

    Hi Sophea...nice to meet you and thanks for your nice writing. I liked to read it.
    I think communication between husband and wife is very important issue wherever you are...since the bad communication can trigger many difficult problems in the family. Not only to the couple but to their children as well.

    There would be many elements making a couple to remain in a good relationship...
    But if the both husband and wife have thoughts that they have equal right...the communication would go much easier...

  • Comment number 9.

    Hi Sophea and hi everyone

    Thanks Sophea for sharing us a very exciting topic from Cambodia. I agree with most of you that communication is very important in our lives - both private and social life. As mentioned by some of you there are many kinds of communication, therefore I think one of the most significant thing is that "how" and "what" we communicate with each other. Besides, the relationship between husbands and wives is a controversial issue in Asia, where most husbands are dominant and are considered as decision makers. Furthermore, I think Asian people do not want to speak directly to the problem, they are just scared to upset the partner. Thank you once again and look forward to reading your next blog.

    Bacira

  • Comment number 10.

    Hello Sophea and everyone!
    I enjoyed reading your blog and comments from friends from around the world!
    I am happy to share thoughts about this topic. I always keep in mind that to have good communication, you should try to listen and look at carefully what others (in this situation, husband or wife) saying or doing and try to understand them.
    I really agree with Bacira, in my country Japan, people including me, often avoid to talk about the problems because as Bacira said, we are just scared to upset our partner, and scared to make relationships worse which make the situation worse...
    So, I think communication is very important in life, and to make better communication with your partner, you need to show that you want to understand your partner more, as well as you want to be understood so that we see communication as a way of better understanding of each other.

    Thank you for reading and sorry for my poor English. Am I made understood?

    Aya

  • Comment number 11.

    Hi Sophea
    Thank you for your interesting post
    I'm from Vietnam - Cambodia's neighbor. In Vietnam, communication between husband and wife is the same as in Cambodia. A couple often talk about the children, money and work. I think it's easy to understand because Vietnam and Cambodia are developing countries, where the finance is still be the most haunted problem to local people. It's a sad truth!
    Pray for you, Sophea

  • Comment number 12.

    Hi Sophea,

    I agree with you when you say communication is an important issue in a relationship.
    I've never been married, but I frequently hear people complaining that they don't have a dialogue with their husband or wife anymore.
    But I think it's always a two way road. If someone is complaining, it means he or she is not communicating either. So perhaps he or she should stop complaining and start putting a stronger effort to improving communication with his or her beloved one. It may be hard in the beginning but if they still have what it takes to be together, they'll come around.
    Nice to meet you.

    Warm regards,
    Mauricio

  • Comment number 13.

    hello, i'm thankful for your contribution, this is an advantage to talk about how importance is the communication in a couple life. Well, i think all is about love because when you love each other , you will spend more time together then find ways to share many things. You will often have occasions to communicate.
    one question, is there any Good relationship/household without communication ?
    i am afraid so ! holding a household without communicating is just like building a castle on the sand ! partners should communicate ! go for it !

  • Comment number 14.

    Hello Sophea,
    I am looking forward to reading your next writing of communication between a married couple in Cambodia, which might be a difficult theme to write in sentences as
    it is sometimes hard to dip up rich meanings from what has seemingly poor things.

  • Comment number 15.

    Hi Sophea,
    I agree with you that communication is very important for good relationship. However, a lack of communication isn't problem only of poor countries. As for my experiences here in Czech republic, women are slightly more sensitive and want to communicate, but men very often do not want to talk, especially not about problems. (I don't want to offend men, but it is true.) So it is sometimes very hard to communicate... But I must admit that also non-verbal communication has an important place, as tonetcatala wrote. Maybe that is the way of men's communication?
    Have a nice day,
    Tereza

  • Comment number 16.

    Hi dear Sophea!
    Your entry has an interesting topic also, you write very clear and lively!
    I'm not sure if this is a suitable word to appreciate you as a young woman, making effort to conduct her people to the fact of life! Anyway, your efforts are precious.
    In my view, communication is a very important necessity and no matter where they are or in what situation they live. Couples besides their economic needs, have mental needs too as it make them enable to overcome their difficulties and I believe it's the first need! What do you think about? It would be nice to know your view.

    Karoun

  • Comment number 17.

    Hi sophea!

    Thanks so much for sharing experiences from Cambodge! I'm not yet married, but this is a place I can find useful information to build strong and good relationship. This is a fact, non verbal communication is a powerful and honest way to share feelings and make oneself understood.

  • Comment number 18.

    hi sophea!

    Thanks for your topic, and for sharing with us your experience in cambodia!
    I live in France, and, even in my coutrie, communication in many couples is very difficult! They can talk together, but only about topics from every day life. But, if they had problems to resolve, they choose the most easier way... and finally... divorced. So, i think comminication in a couple is a very difficult things, and demand a lot of respect, trust and honnesty.

  • Comment number 19.

    Hello Sophea!
    first of all, let me tell you that you r name is beautiful and we have it here in Algeria.I really like discussing topics and writing down comments to benefit others and have a variety of opinions which i believe it's necessary to get our lives prospered .
    I've been married for ten years and i can tell you that i consider my couple the happiest in at least my environment. This did not become easy but by communicating with my husband. we discuss everything even if there is no necessity to. I can tell that getting involved in various topics within a couple can open horizons in this relationship which has to be the most important relation rather that other relationship outside the house door.
    Thank you very much for your sharing this with us.

  • Comment number 20.

    Hello everyone
    I want to improve my level in english thanks to learning english!
    It's my teacher of english who introduced me to this website.
    So i think it's a good topic.
    For answer to your questions Sophea, i think that the communication in a couple was the main key of success like in group of person like in your job. The communication is very important to understand someone.
    I live in France and I am in couple for six years. In my relation I prefer the dialogue with him, I want, all know of the other and say all with him. This is my vision of the couple and it's thanks to this that I am always with him I think ..
    Thank you for listening.

  • Comment number 21.

    Hi Sophea,
    Your article is really thoughtful and full with useful information, especially people who have just got married.
    To answer your first question, communication between husband and wife, in my opinion, husbands and wives are open to each other sharing their feelings and everyday life. In order to do that, it is very important that they are spending quality time together only by themselves. for instance, going for a trip in vacation. it will certainly bring their relationship up more closer and tied them up in unbreakable bondings.
    The importance of communication for couples is significant to live in happy life. Husband and wife can be the best friends and have lot of fun. Besides that, each of them can be the most reliable person to other in the critical situations such as unfortunate accidents or any difficulties in the social or job life.
    Furthermore, the people around the couples especially, friends and relatives, can play a vital role to help improving the relationship between husbands and wife. Good suggestions would definitely be welcomed by the couples.
    regards,
    shahed

  • Comment number 22.

    Hello Sophea,
    I was reading your very interesting blog so I though to reply to you.
    I think that it's really important the communication between husband and wife because it could help to solve problems within the family.
    A poor communication can demage the relationship and this could be wrong for both sposes and for children too.
    Best regards from Italy

    Vito

  • Comment number 23.

    Hello, Sophea.
    My situation is slightly different. My husband is reluctant to speak about business and finance, while I'm more interested in how's he doing at work, his ups and downs. But he knows almost everything about my work and money, because I like to speak more and since we spend most part of the day and the week at work -where do most news come from? So this becomes a one-side communication. Sometimes I tell my husband news about my friends, but he's not particularly interested. On the other hand, he is not my female best friend to gossip about the others. He likes talking to me about science and sport but as I cannot always support the talk on the kind of sport I'm not keen on or the field of science I'm not competent in, these talks fade away. On the whole, I would say that we don't communicate enough, as most two-side communication revolves around immediate things-news on TV, food to buy etc. Many men don't want to discuss current problems, the future, speculate more about the issues, be more open -and that's what we really lack.

  • Comment number 24.

    Hello Sophea,

    Thank you very much for such an important topic you have chosen.

    Communication between husbands and wives is very essential to carry on a relation. Husband should share what is going on his life; personal, financial, political, everything. And of course he also should share with his life partner about the future plan and tell her to add her plan as well to make a best plan. On the other hand, wives also must have to share what is going on her life; personal, financial and what she is missing? More time or more money? Over all relation should be like friend and there will be no gap between them.

    In order to minimize the communication gap both, husband and wife should take steps. Both of them should respect each other and small gifts can also play a great role for developing relation.

    Lastly I want to say both of them need to sacrifice for the relation and a happy life.

    Thank you.

  • Comment number 25.

    Hi,
    Thanks for sharing the information.
    Yes, i agreed your valid points; communication is very important one in our day to day life. it makes us to understand how to lead our married life. Especially husband and wives has to discuss many things in their life on the decisions.
    Good and open communication will reduce the misunderstandings, it will maintain a long and health relationship between Husband and wife.

  • Comment number 26.

    communcation is importan issue for each classes communty specialy between husbands and waives , I have friend he was divore her wive , I had beautfull realition with them , and I love thier child madly his name SH he at school I devote my time thinking about how resolve a proplem between them I decided to make supprious for them . small trip in magnificent place and suggestive , each one stared seeing positivelly to anther and notcied a beautfull side a still hidden in house and child and nothing here mislead thier eyes and both of them descoverd live is not just money.

  • Comment number 27.

    hello Sophea,
    thanks for your posting, I like it.I think communication is critical to couple.Most of the conflicts are owing to lacking of conversion, like I and my girlfriend!Sometimes I thought time can resolve everything. But I was wrong.That just will only cause "Cold War". Conversion between husbands and wives is a critical necessity needed to improve the couple's relationship.
    best regards,
    Yamapi

  • Comment number 28.

    Hi Sophea, First thanks for share with us your experiences, I think it is important for no matter what kind of relationship.Especially, The couples live together,but they do not communicate each other. I think that is very odd for couple. The reason is they are too busy to talk each other, so they can not have a good communication. I advice that couple can often take a vacation in holiday, to have fun also relaxing so they can talk each other easily.

  • Comment number 29.

    Hello, Sophea
    At first sight you have a lot common living in one roof, but I think you’re not the one, who have the same situation. You have a child it’s a big interesting common way of coming closer together. Taking some key moments from my experience I want you to experience it on yours, if it’s ok, of course. When he comes from work, both of you’re tired, and here try to talk about how you spent your workday; what interesting happened, fruitful day or not, tell about your colleagues, children that you meet, how sweet and funny they are. Maybe you should start first in order to dispose him. Going together to the cinema/theatre/exhibition, I understand that in everyday routine it seems impossible, but one time in a halfyear or let it be a year, it a good reason to discuss your trip elsewhere. I understand that your family is established and it’s quite hard to contribute something new, but it is worth to try to you.
    Wish you all the best,
    Aizhan

 

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