BBC BLOGS - Chris Charles
IN ASSOCIATION WITH
« Previous | Main | Next »

Review of the week

Post categories:

Chris Charles | 15:01 UK time, Friday, 26 February 2010

Just when it looked as if things couldn't get worse for Fabio Capello, along comes a four-letter word guaranteed to strike fear into the heart of any England manager.....WAGs.

According to the Daily Mirror, the ladies who lunch are planning to set up 'base camp' 15 miles from the World Cup squad's South African headquarters.

If true, it would make the sorry saga of Cole/Bridge/Terry (or Terry Colebridge to give them their Hollywood name) seem as troubling as a Tim Henman fist pump.

The paper claims the girls were originally due to be based on Mauritius - a four-hour flight away - but presumably some can't bear the thought of being parted from their beaus for too long. Either that or they want to keep an eye on them.
WAGs at Germany 2006
WAGs at Germany 2006
Capello's original announcement that there would be no repeat of the WAGs' circus which dogged the last World Cup was warmly received by England fans and players alike. Indeed Frank Lampard recently admitted: "I don't want the women staying round the corner so I'm thinking 'Does she want me there today?'"

"It will not be like Germany. Absolutely not. Please!" roared Capello in Churchillian fashion after watching his team seal qualification to South Africa 2010.

But you can't keep a good WAG down for long, and, if The Mirror are to be believed, they have their eye on a hotel in Sun City, which will no doubt be rebranded by the tabloids once one of them is pictured falling out of her bikini. Incidentally, Baden-Baden was especially singled out ahead of the last World Cup to give the WAGs two shots at remembering where they were staying.

On a similar theme, my other half was on a girly trip in Manchester last weekend and discovered her party were staying in the same hotel as the Manchester City squad.

At one stage, the good lady and her two friends were standing in the bar when a group of players walked past letting off a wolf-whistle or two. Thankfully, in true red-top reporter fashion, the ladies made their excuses and left. At least, that's what she told me.

Since then, City have been involved in a bore-draw with Liverpool, before being dumped out of the FA Cup by Stoke - causing the good lady to question whether she's put a hex on them. I've reassured her that's a load of old nonsense - but just in case, I've instructed her to hold their next weekend away in Chelsea.

Which brings us nicely to Saturday's clash between the Premier League leaders and Man City, or the Battle of Stamford Bridge Part II. In the original, King Harold saw off the Vikings before meeting his maker in Hastings three months later. The sequel promises to be just as fiery.

In the blue corner is John Terry, in the light-blue corner Wayne Bridge, with Vanessa whassername holding up the cards in between rounds, possibly. Ladbrokes are offering 50/1 that the pair are sent off for fighting, 5/1 that a City player scores to reveal a Team Bridge top and 500/1 that Bridge and Terry make up and do a Morecambe and Wise dance down the tunnel. OK, I made that last one up.

Meanwhile, Football 365 are running a poll on what Bridge will do when Terry offers his hand before the match - a) shake it; b) ignore it; c) go to shake it and pull his hand away or d) give him a Chinese burn. I'd personally like to see a repeat of the treatment dished out to Steven Gerrard by the Chelsea mascot in the tunnel a few years back, where the cheeky rascal stuck his tongue out and waved his hand on his nose.

Bridge's very public announcement that he would be retiring from England duty must have been an irritant to the Terry camp, who had seen their man disappear off the front pages thanks to Chelsea colleague Ashley Cole's alleged indiscretions. I think that's what they call taking one for the team captain.

In the Champions League, Jose Mourinho drew first blood as Inter saw off Chelsea in the San Siro, a match every bit as pulsating as the warm-up, which saw the Special One renew his rivalry with former AC Milan boss Carlo Ancelotti.

Responding to suggestions from Ancelotti that the whole of Italy (barring Inter fans) would be behind Chelsea, Mourinho replied: "If he says that, it's because he knows and because somebody told him or because he belongs to the clan." Expect Jose to be waking up next to a horse's head in the very near future (no van Nistelrooy jokes, please).

The honeymoon is also over for Mourinho's predecessor Roberto Mancini, following reports of bust-ups with Carlos Tevez and Craig Bellamy. Luckily for the Manchester City manager, he can always count on his 'Linus blanket' for comfort, to the extent where he is even wearing the famous scarf for press conferences - indoors.

In the red half of Manchester, Wayne Rooney took his tally for the season to 27 with another double-header against West Ham. He has now found the net eight times with his head this term, putting paid to those critics who insisted he had nothing upstairs.
Wayne RooneyRooney scores against West Ham
Roman Pavlyuchenko is another striker in form, with four goals in two games, including the double that did for Bolton in the FA Cup. Before his hot-streak, a frustrated Pavlyuchenko said: "I sometimes feel that Redknapp is making fun of me." A claim dismissed as nonsense by the Spurs boss as he did the rabbit ear fingers over his striker's head.

In other news, Anderson's season is over after rupturing his cruciate ligament. Sad news indeed, but at least it gives the Brazilian more time to devote to his favourite programme, following his recent revelation that "I love Jeremy Kyle. It's my favourite show. I watch it all the time!" Can't stand the programme myself, although I'd pay good money to watch a Premier League special.

And finally, with all these tawdry stories doing the rounds, it's refreshing to hear news of a footballer who keeps his brains in his head rather than his trousers. I'm talking, of course, about Burnley's Clarke Carlisle, who has been taking Countdown by storm this week, with words like demonic, barred and inane - all of which have been used to describe some of his fellow professional down the years.

His second appearance brought him 101 points (how Portsmouth could do with some of those) but he has still not figured out how to solve the conundrum of his team's away form. After his second victory, host Jeff Stelling quipped: "That's two wins in a row - more than Burnley have managed all season!"

Right, that's it from me. If the rumours are true, my lot are in line for manager number five this season, in the shape of Neil Warnock, whose very own Countdown conundrum reveals the best nickname in football, ever.

Comments

  • 1. At 4:23pm on 26 Feb 2010, StarfireReturns wrote:

    Good on the missus for putting a hex on team moneybags Chris.

    Complain about this comment

  • 2. At 4:23pm on 26 Feb 2010, StarfireReturns wrote:

    Hmm first in ... Think I'll put my feet up before the regulars rock up :P

    Complain about this comment

  • 3. At 4:26pm on 26 Feb 2010, StarfireReturns wrote:

    Points are the least of Pompey's worries now Chris ... mind at least they can still get some more ... old Chester FC can't even do that now.

    Complain about this comment

  • 4. At 4:29pm on 26 Feb 2010, BaggieMike wrote:

    Indeed, sad day for chester, be interesting to see how the go about the whole removing the vs chester games from the season. Are they jsut going to atke all points won against chester away?

    Complain about this comment

  • 5. At 4:31pm on 26 Feb 2010, BaggieMike wrote:

    Also apparently this has been up since 15.01 - that cant be right there would be at least someone shouting first (in 5th place) by now....

    Complain about this comment

  • 6. At 4:32pm on 26 Feb 2010, BaggieMike wrote:

    Jsut me and you in here Star - guess that no one else has found it yet?

    Complain about this comment

  • 7. At 4:37pm on 26 Feb 2010, Spitfire wrote:

    Evening Chris,

    your fine lady is a Liverpool fan isnt she?
    Hate to imagine what she might have done to make sure the Man City players are unable to perform any good.






    Some of them magic spells are right nasty.

    And may I request you keep ample distance from that lazy smoggy Robbo. He is bad influence that man and you are posting your blogs as punctually as him.

    No good.

    Complain about this comment

  • 8. At 4:38pm on 26 Feb 2010, Holloway2Holland wrote:

    Hi Chris.

    Well worth the wait and we all now that the weekend can begin now that ROTW is here.

    How ironic is it that the England teams hotel is in Phokeng (tee hee)

    The Red tops are gonna have a field day, I can see it now.

    "Fab wants no funny business in Phokeng"

    "Wags close to Phokeng"

    "Players without their wives in Phokeng paradise"

    A rag journos wet dream.

    Complain about this comment

  • 9. At 4:38pm on 26 Feb 2010, Chris Charles wrote:

    1. StarfireReturns: And returns with a vengeance! Congratulations, sir.

    5. BaggieMike: Good spot there. The piece was written and waiting to go at that time but the editor who needed to run the rule over it before it could go live was tied up, hence the delay.

    Complain about this comment

  • 10. At 4:40pm on 26 Feb 2010, BaggieMike wrote:

    Chris - seems to have worked in that no one has come in shouting first - think we are safe.

    H2H - im sure someone quite high up at the sun had some influence in the choice of homebase for maximum punability
    Anyway home time - good luck to your teams, and have a good weekend.

    Complain about this comment

  • 11. At 4:43pm on 26 Feb 2010, GINOLLLLA wrote:

    Good stuff as always Chris!!

    Seems the Chelsea Man City game could get an all time high viewing, everyone looking forward to see how Bridge will react!

    Hope to see Pav bag another brace this weekend, but Everton are looking really good

    Complain about this comment

  • 12. At 4:48pm on 26 Feb 2010, Holloway2Holland wrote:

    This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.

  • 13. At 4:52pm on 26 Feb 2010, JacksfromBuxton wrote:

    Ahoy Chris.Excellent as always,I echo H2s sentiments.
    I find the Pompey administration a worry.Without wishing to sound all Vince Cable about it,they are the first of many to come over the next few years.I also think Wayne Bridge has acted like a gent with his withdrawing from international football.Didn't take long for "friends" of John Terry to chirp up though.
    Neil Warnock?Pah.You've got a long way to go before you get the worst manager in the Championship.We're up against a team that should be sponsored by The Sun,Bristol City.Another nul points...

    Complain about this comment

  • 14. At 4:55pm on 26 Feb 2010, Liam Firkin wrote:

    I Can't wait For The Terry Bridge Meeting - Hopefully Bridge will take a good chuck of his leg home with him rather than his shirt!

    I would rather be without Terry for the world cup then have him on the basis of his poor form recently!

    Complain about this comment

  • 15. At 4:55pm on 26 Feb 2010, GINOLLLLA wrote:

    Anyone know who these friends are that have chirped up on behalf of Terry? I've not heard anything you see, but agree with Jacks that Bridge has acted like a true gent.
    There's no wrong or right answer, but he's done what is best for him - which is the best thing to do. It would make me chuckle should Capello drop Terry from the squad.

    Although I disagree with Jacks on that being Warnock - the worst manager in the championship? I can see why some dislike him, but he's alright

    Complain about this comment

  • 16. At 4:56pm on 26 Feb 2010, SimplyZola wrote:

    Chris you heard the Villa cup final song? Hope they play it out loud during the final.

    Great blog again, its a pleasure reading it.

    Complain about this comment

  • 17. At 4:57pm on 26 Feb 2010, OrientWob wrote:

    Should WAGs now become WAGAMs to include alleged Mistresses?

    Complain about this comment

  • 18. At 4:59pm on 26 Feb 2010, Liam Firkin wrote:

    With Villa in the Final this year I am hoping not for a 1-0 bore taht we would come to expect from Chelsea - United!

    Lets Pray Ashley Young Gives Gary 'I can't believe his ridiculous tash' Neville the run around Sunday !!

    Complain about this comment

  • 19. At 5:05pm on 26 Feb 2010, visionthing wrote:

    Colin W*nker?

    Complain about this comment

  • 20. At 5:09pm on 26 Feb 2010, Didier Drogba- just another Cameron Jerome wannabe wrote:

    liam- don't get your hopes up, villa are known for just sitting back adn defending, especially against the big clubs

    Complain about this comment

  • 21. At 5:10pm on 26 Feb 2010, jurynow wrote:

    Chris, why do you have a photo of Will Carling in your profile picture?

    Complain about this comment

  • 22. At 5:12pm on 26 Feb 2010, OrientWob wrote:

    Indeed Frank Lampard recently admitted: "I don't want the women staying round the corner so I'm thinking 'Does she want me there today?'"

    Does he also check to see all team mates are present?

    Complain about this comment

  • 23. At 5:32pm on 26 Feb 2010, Chris Charles wrote:

    7. Spitfire: Oi, watch it! Yes, she is a Liverpool fan but I can assure you she would never do anything untoward. Er, I think.

    8. Holloway2Holland: Yes, there's going to be plenty of fun with that name over the coming months. 'Phokeng useless' will doubtless accompany our exit from the competition after a heavy defeat by the mighty Slovenia.

    13. JacksfromBuxton: I feel for the Pompey fans and, like you, fear it is just the tip of the iceberg. On the subject of Warnock, if he does get the job I'll feel a little uneasy that he's leaving Palace in the lurch at their hour of need, particularly if he brings some of their players with him.

    Of course I'd rather we stay up ahead of anybody else, but don't like to see a team kicked when they're down. That said, if Warnock feels he's going to get the old heave-ho once the club is taken over then I guess he's just safeguarding his future.

    16. SimplyZola: No, haven't had the pleasure but will be listening out for it at the weekend!

    17. OrientWob: WAGMAMs - like it! To take it on a stage further, how about Wives And Girlfriends, Alleged Mistresses And Mums Also - aka WAGAMAMAs.

    19. visionthing: Got it in one!

    21. jurynow: Will Carling?! I've heard it all now.

    Complain about this comment

  • 24. At 5:35pm on 26 Feb 2010, OrientWob wrote:

    Chris, really should apologise, first time I have commented on your blog and forgot to say that it is a good read every week. Currently in Athens and last night a Panathanikos (excuse spelling) fan celebrated their win against Roma by firing a shotgun from his appartment balcony, noone complained!

    Complain about this comment

  • 25. At 5:38pm on 26 Feb 2010, SimplyZola wrote:

    Here it is:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BMogWN7BLjU

    You have been warned.

    Complain about this comment

  • 26. At 5:41pm on 26 Feb 2010, OrientWob wrote:

    SimplySola, I clicked the link and all of a sudden my life lost all desire to keep going!

    Complain about this comment

  • 27. At 5:44pm on 26 Feb 2010, UKARP wrote:

    Carl Wonnkie?

    Complain about this comment

  • 28. At 5:52pm on 26 Feb 2010, visionthing wrote:

    W*nk 'n' recoil

    Complain about this comment

  • 29. At 6:07pm on 26 Feb 2010, Bart_E_Slartfast wrote:

    Top blog as always, Chris.

    Neil Warnock - Learn in wok.

    Re. The Battle of Stamford Bridge. King Harold (a Viking) beat Harold Hardrada (a Viking) at Stamford Bridge (in Yorkshire) before he was killed by the Normans (another bunch of Vikings) at Hastings.

    Who beat the Vikings?

    Itchy Ban?!

    Complain about this comment

  • 30. At 6:13pm on 26 Feb 2010, visionthing wrote:

    Nora C. Winkle?

    Complain about this comment

  • 31. At 6:54pm on 26 Feb 2010, Rovers Return - HKR AWAY DAYS wrote:

    "Right, that's it from me. If the rumours are true, my lot are in line for manager number five this season, in the shape of Neil Warnock, whose very own Countdown conundrum reveals the best nickname in football, ever."

    Damn, I'm never any good at these!

    Complain about this comment

  • 32. At 7:20pm on 26 Feb 2010, ShotsPaauul wrote:

    "Right, that's it from me. If the rumours are true, my lot are in line for manager number five this season, in the shape of Neil Warnock, whose very own Countdown conundrum reveals the best nickname in football, ever."

    Um... 'A clown inker?' :s

    Complain about this comment

  • 33. At 7:47pm on 26 Feb 2010, Holloway2Holland wrote:

    Neil Warnock
    A wreck on nil
    A clerk no win
    Cloak winner
    Warlock nine
    A known relic
    A lick renown
    A clink owner
    A lock winner
    Clean in work

    That'll do for now.

    Complain about this comment

  • 34. At 9:04pm on 26 Feb 2010, visionthing wrote:

    Acorn winkle?

    Complain about this comment

  • 35. At 9:08pm on 26 Feb 2010, Chevy_bass wrote:

    Rankie Clown?

    Complain about this comment

  • 36. At 9:13pm on 26 Feb 2010, Theo Logical wrote:

    I can't stop laughing at Tim Henman's fist-pump! Thanks for making my day!

    Complain about this comment

  • 37. At 9:16pm on 26 Feb 2010, Chevy_bass wrote:

    Cow L Kinnear?! Doesn't really work that one, does it?!

    Complain about this comment

  • 38. At 10:04pm on 26 Feb 2010, Chris Charles wrote:

    24. OrientWob: Why thank you, kind sir! Can't believe that shotgun story -I've never had much cause to celebrate anything football-wise, but if QPR manage to stay up this season, I may well borrow my daughter's water pistol and go completely crazy.

    25. SimplyZola: Thanks for that....I think. Good grief, that is, frankly, not great. Not a big X-Factor afficionado, but from the bits I did watch, I don't remember her. She can sing in tune, though, so every cloud....I guess.

    Loving all the Neil Warnock anagrams. HKR (31) - you know really, don't you? If not, see comment 19 for the answer. Holloway2Holland (33) has obviously got far too much time on his hands, although I do like warlock nine - wonder what the other two got sent off for? Of the rest, Nora C Winkle is a winner, while Chevy_bass's Cow L Kinnear may not work, but it's still ace!

    Complain about this comment

  • 39. At 10:47pm on 26 Feb 2010, paul mawer wrote:

    its a shame about Chester and the others in trouble,but i had relatives living in the area and in the eighties a friend played for them Mick Speight signed him,i would often go see them,I always paid even if i could get free tickets.hopefully a new beginning like AFC Wimbledon will see you back soon

    Complain about this comment

  • 40. At 01:06am on 27 Feb 2010, Ricardo wrote:

    25. SimplyZola: Thanks for that....I think. Good grief, that is, frankly, not great. Not a big X-Factor afficionado, but from the bits I did watch, I don't remember her. She can sing in tune, though, so every cloud....I guess.
    -----------------------
    You're being a bit polite there. Interesting choice of lyrics though, singing "We're the Villa, we're the championnes. We are the champions..." when the opposition for the day are the reigning champions of England. Suppose they'll get away with it so long as the prawn sarnies haven't run out by the time it's played though.

    Complain about this comment

  • 41. At 05:40am on 27 Feb 2010, Lagellerotumblero - Show goes on after 606 wrote:

    Nice blog as always Chris, but how could you forget the story about the Canadian women's ice hockey team's parting antics after winning gold? And IOC are conducting an investigation on the matter! They don't live in the real world, they just live in their damned tuxedos.

    Complain about this comment

  • 42. At 06:01am on 27 Feb 2010, Bishwaksen Bandyopadhyay wrote:

    another good one Chris, a bit more footy and a bit less wags would have been even better though......btw thanks for that Chelsea kid Gerrard link, have seen it before but makes me smile every time

    Complain about this comment

  • 43. At 07:17am on 27 Feb 2010, JacksfromBuxton wrote:

    Although I disagree with Jacks on that being Warnock - the worst manager in the championship? I can see why some dislike him, but he's alright
    _________________________________________
    I like Warnock,he's a bit of a character.The worst manager in the championship was more a reference to the current incumbent at the Mighty Ipswich...

    Complain about this comment

  • 44. At 09:01am on 27 Feb 2010, StarfireReturns wrote:

    41. At 05:40am on 27 Feb 2010, Lagellerotumblero wrote:

    Nice blog as always Chris, but how could you forget the story about the Canadian women's ice hockey team's parting antics after winning gold? And IOC are conducting an investigation on the matter! They don't live in the real world, they just live in their damned tuxedos.

    -------------------------------

    Agreed ... I'd much rather see them having a bit of fun on the ice instead of the usual blood and punch ups that are ubiquitous with ice hockey or so it seems.

    Complain about this comment

  • 45. At 09:09am on 27 Feb 2010, Wash wrote:

    Chris, why do you have a photo of Will Carling in your profile picture?

    -------------------------------------------------
    A couple of weeks ago, there was a craze (for want of a better word) on facebook for changing your profile picture for someone you looked like.


    Chris obviously uploaded his to the wrong site...

    Complain about this comment

  • 46. At 11:56am on 27 Feb 2010, Spurs59er wrote:

    Looks like you'll be getting royalty with Earl Winnock on the way :)

    By the way, why was your editor tied up? Is this a BBC thing?

    Great blog.

    Complain about this comment

  • 47. At 11:08am on 28 Feb 2010, mk1Sportline wrote:

    Looking at the WAGS and one thing springs to mind. They are all obviously very consious of their look, but dare I say it all need good Rhinoplasti - Nice legs, shame about the face.

    Complain about this comment

  • 48. At 11:14pm on 28 Feb 2010, Spitfire wrote:

    The WAGS: too late to get all of them pregnant ASAP so at the time of WC, they could be banned from flying on medical grounds?

    Complain about this comment

  • 49. At 1:36pm on 01 Mar 2010, JacksfromBuxton wrote:

    Speak to the Chelsea back 4,Spits.I'm sure they could help...

    Complain about this comment

  • 50. At 11:12am on 05 Mar 2010, Chris Charles wrote:

    Hi all,
    Just in case any of you are looking in and wondering why Review of the Week hasn't appeared today (Fri 5 Mar)I've had to take the day off for family reasons. Hopefully business as usual next week.
    Cheers,
    Chris

    Complain about this comment

View these comments in RSS

BBC iD

Sign in

BBC navigation

BBC © 2014 The BBC is not responsible for the content of external sites. Read more.

This page is best viewed in an up-to-date web browser with style sheets (CSS) enabled. While you will be able to view the content of this page in your current browser, you will not be able to get the full visual experience. Please consider upgrading your browser software or enabling style sheets (CSS) if you are able to do so.