Review of the week
It was the week when the Swinging 60s made a spectacular comeback. First we had Gordon Brown's run-in with a pensioner, then it was Roy Hodgson's turn to strike a blow for football's old guard.
While the Prime Minister woke up to headlines of 'Brown Toast', Hodgson was using his loaf to mastermind Fulham's dramatic Europa League semi-final win over Hamburg at the Cottage.
I had a feeling Fulham's name was on the Cup the moment they produced that stirring fightback against Juventus in the last 16 - note to Gordon, that's how you put the Old Lady in her place.
The last time the Cottagers were in a major final, Mud had just replaced the Bay City Rollers at number one, The Sweeney was new to our screens and Roy the boy was a mere 27-years-old. Yep, that long ago.
Mud - big in the 70s
The climax to Fulham's incredible run will see them take on Atletico Madrid in Hamburg on 12 May (take note, opposition fans, all mocking chants should now be amended to 'Wednesday nights, Channel 5').
Atletico supporters are preparing for the big day by looking up the Spanish for 'Does your butler know you're here' - a favourite anti-Fulham chant to which celebrity fan Hugh Grant presumably always replies: "Er, yes."
Incredibly, their other famous supporter, Lily Allen, chose not to tweet about her club's finest hour, although the word on the street is that she's busy writing their Cup final song, working title FLM.
While they'll be dancing in the aisles of Harrods this weekend, spare a thought for Liverpool fans, who saw their side cruelly dumped out of the Europa League by a late strike from former Manchester United cult hero Diego Forlan.
The Reds have still got an outside chance of qualifying for the Champions League if they beat Chelsea on Sunday, but in doing so they would almost certainly allow United to overhaul their record of league titles. Think that's what you call a no-win situation.
My other half was feeling a tad under the weather on Thursday night and went to bed with her beloved Liverpool seemingly cruising into the final. I hadn't got the heart to break the news to her before I left for work on Friday, although it's fair to say it's unlikely my tea will be on the table when I get in.
One of the few bright spots was the performance of Alberto Aquilani - in stark contrast to the first leg, where a tweeter purporting to be Lucas Leiva (it isn't) wrote: "One-and-a-half hour journey. Aquilani decided to stand up for the whole duration of the way back. He can't face another 90 minutes sitting down."
If results go against the Reds over the next fortnight, they may not even qualify for the Europa League, although England could have an unlikely representative in next season's competition.
There's a Fair Play League spot up for grabs and if Fulham win in Hamburg, the next best-placed club is relegated Burnley, meaning the Clarets could conceivably be playing Huddersfield one week and AC Milan the next - a bit of season-ticket sales spin even Alastair Campbell would be proud of.
Burnley were all but joined in the Championship by Hull, where for once Iain Dowie's famed 'bouncebackability' deserted him. I say for once, he also got relegated with Crystal Palace, Charlton and Newcastle. Pity the poor bellboy who innocently enquires "Going down?" the next time Dowie finds himself in a hotel lift.
Congratulations to Bournemouth, who joined Notts County and Rochdale in League One, while it's squeaky bum time for Grimsby, who are clinging on to their league status by their fingertips. Their precarious position sparked an extraordinary online rant from Mariners fan Poojah on Grimsby site The Fishy, most of which is unrepeatable, although it would be rude not to give you a (heavily edited) taste:
"For starters, work can (get lost). If they think I'm going to be there on Monday morning they've got another thing coming. No way am I going in to spend time dealing with (idiots) that I can barely stand being with when I'm in a good mood....
"Dad, you can (go away). This is your fault. Your idea. You introduced me to this shower of (manure). 'Come with me to Blundell Park,' you said, 'Come and support the boys.' What could I do? I was (flipping) four, what choice did I have? Why not get me hooked on heroin whilst you were at it? I could have gone with mum shopping for bras and knickers at British Home Stores, but no, you knew best....
"The girlfriend can definitely (go away). Her best attempt at consolation - "I don't know why you're bothered; you knew they were (rubbish) anyway". Yes love, but they're MY (rubbish) team.....
"The radio can (go away) . On my way home from the match, whilst driving down the M180, I caught three completely separate stations playing 'Down' by Jay Sean at the exact same (flipping) time. The song's the best part of a year old, how the (hell) does that happen by coincidence?!"
Well, you get the picture. Other targets for abuse include Barrow, the World Cup, his local pizza place and his nan's old lucky Buddha. Yet if Grimsby beat relegation rivals Barnet on Saturday and win their last game, while Barnet lose theirs, they can stay up. I look forward to reading part two should that scenario arise.
The charge of the white brigade (see below)
Quote of the week goes to 5 live summariser Pat Nevin, who upon seeing Patrice Evra and Nani throwing up during Man Utd's win over Spurs, said: "I've never seen that happen before. I've seen it once or twice." While the top chant belonged to West Ham fans who shouted "Go compare!" to Rafa Benitez.
Elsewhere, Manchester United fans are preparing to fire up the Quattro, following rumours that their new strip will be going back to the 80s, while Portsmouth supporters are preparing to be ridiculed at Wembley after Aaron Mokoena revealed David James was designing their FA Cup suits, which would "surprise people". That's the same David James responsible for Liverpool's white Armani suits at the 1996 final with United.
And finally, I can't go without mentioning Jose Mourinho, who looked like the offspring of John Travolta's Saturday Night Fever character and the Duracell bunny as he leapt across the pitch to celebrate Inter Milan's stunning defeat of Barcelona. Fantastic drama, which means we can look forward to a Champions League final of Inter v Bayer Munich. It's the one they all wanted.
Right that's it. Have a good weekend one and all. I'm off to see QPR host Newcastle's end-of-season promotion party at Loftus Road. Can't wait.
P.S. Apologies for not replying to many people on Quotes of the Week (had to dash) and also for not including this email link to send in quotes etc.
I am a journalist with BBC Sport, dealing with the more offbeat stories doing the rounds. I am a QPR fan - and also quite fond of football. If our new-found wealth brings success I'll be happy to tell anyone exactly where I was when we were sh... rubbish - row J seat 139. 
~RS~q~RS~~RS~z~RS~27~RS~)
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Cheers Chris,
have fun at the magpies promotion party. Careful with the beer 'eh. Tricky business.
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This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.
To clarify #2:
I am not being ageist in suggesting our grandparent's generation does not, erm, enjoy themselves.
Just that, you know how women need to be in the right mood is all.
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That would just about top things off nicely if Burnley qualify for the Europa and Liverpool don't even make that! Thanks Rafa but your time here is done! (Yes I'm a Liverpool fan)
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erm Chris - if you think Poojah's post asking the world to go away is good, may I remind all and sundry of his magnum opus "Dear players of Grimsby Town FC". A rant as yet never equalled. Just read it again, fantastic. If anyone has failed to see it, just google Poojah and "dear players"
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Gertcha loofah boy,I've just found a couple of broken pint pots on the floor,anything to do with you?
Again I seem to type highlight of the week being Fulham.I thought Woy was fantastic in his post match interview in thanking the fans for sticking with him and the club 3 seasons ago in the relegation battle and this was their reward.
Courtesy of Evil-Weazel this......
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......................f`-,.........`-,/...*-,___,,-~*....,-*......|...`-,..........\........
was Rafa at the final whistle.
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terrible manners on my part.
Excellent blog as always CC.Keep it up.....and the bloging.
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Good Blog Chris, as always.
'I say for once, he also got relegated with Crystal Palace, Charlton and Newcastle. Pity the poor bellboy who innocently enquires "Going down?" the next time Dowie finds himself in a hotel lift.'
THere should be some sort of collection of lotsmof moeny to go to the belboy that actualyl does this - he should get some sort of award if he did.
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bantam - cheers for the heads up on dear players - anyone know wheret o get the full dear world one as i cant find it on fishy
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This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the House Rules.
Wasn't it 1975 when Fulham were last in a final? I can hardly believe Mud and the BCR were still around then, my memory truly is terrible. I think Chris, your beloved punk was born to replace the aforementioned rather than the usual 'prog' suspects, after all "Close To The Edge" and "Gates of Delirium" were not released as singles. As for football do you think the Europa result will spell the end for Rafa?
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Dear players.....
http://www.thefishy.co.uk/cgi-bin/forum/Blah.pl?m-1257631840/s-new/
Good shout bantam.
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Bobby Moore was the captain of Fulham that day Rabster.Lost to West Ham 2-0 I think.
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So some nerk thought post #2 broke House Rules?
OK. Lets try again.
Chris wrote,
I had a feeling Fulham's name was on the Cup the moment they produced that stirring fightback against Juventus in the last 16 - note to Gordon, that's how you put the Old Lady in her place.
___________________
and my query, should the PM have scored 4 time in a night too?
Not as amusing now is it?
Thanks for naught BBC!!!!!!
*shakes fist at screen*
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I think Chris, your beloved punk was born to replace the aforementioned rather than the usual 'prog' suspects, after all "Close To The Edge" and "Gates of Delirium" were not released as singles.
_____________________
Quick easy quiz question.
The first punk single was called what,and released by whom?
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15 Jacks, must have been the Damned. Cant name the single.
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Afternoon all:
5. tennesseebantam: I shall have a squiz at that in a bit. Sounds like a must-read!
6. JacksfromBuxton: Yes, fantastic achievement by the Cottagers. As a QPR fan, I think I'm supposed to have an in-built hatred of our west London rivals, but I must confess to having a bit of a soft spot.
It goes back to the days when my great-grandmother would regale me with tales of how she and her schooolfriends would be let in free for the last 10 minutes of every game at Craven Cottage. There was also the time she was told off for running in school on the day Queen Victoria died, but I'll bore you with that one another time.
8. BaggieMike: The whip-round starts here!
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#15 Jacks.
Quick and Easy? You mean British or American? Define "punk." I know a lot of people who believe MC5 were the first true punk band, but the term wasn't around back then (in that context.)
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11. Rabster: Indeed it was and indeed they were. Bay City Rollers had been No 1 for several weeks with Bye Bye Baby, but Mud knocked them off the top spot with Oh Boy, which maybe should be re-released in time for the final as Oh Woy? As for Rafa, time will tell, but it's fair to say Liverpool have had better seasons.
13. JacksfromBuxton: Correct! A double from Alan Taylor as I recall.
15. JacksfromBuxton/16. Spitfire: Pretty sure it was New Rose by The Damned.
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There's a Fair Play League spot up for grabs and if Fulham win in Hamburg, the next best-placed club is relegated Burnley, meaning the Clarets could conceivably be playing Huddersfield one week and AC Milan the next
What?Is that your attempt to jinx us into the Europa League CC?We,hopefully,could finalise our place against Fiorentina this weekend and if it doesnt happen i ruddy know who to blame!
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CC is on the money.New Rose was seen as the first British punk single.
Rabster,I should have been clearer with the question.Apologies.
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Correct! A double from Alan Taylor as I recall.
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The glories of the FA Cup in the 70s.Southampton,West Ham and Ipswich(hurrah) as winners.Never get that happening again.
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http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/m/man_utd/8654634.stm
The Lord of WUM starts the mind games.But as Spitfire pointed out,at least he had the decency to wait until after Liverpool's Europey game...
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Thankfully we wont see a repeat of what happened the last time a British team was in Europa League final with those moronic Rangers fans bringing complete shame to the nation after the game.
The Fulham fans need to get home to let the butler off shift. hahaha
Go Fulham, do us proud. (Aberdeen fan)
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23 - He is basically telling l'pool that they are stuffed whatever the result of their game - which will lead to them being confused and losing - hes a sly old fox that fergie.
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24 - Lee, i think it would be hard someone who doesnt want Fulham to win it at the moment - we were talking about it at work today and a colleague said he was in the street when Fulham beat Juventus and hes a Citeh fan - classic.
GO FULHAM
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25. At 4:25pm on 30 Apr 2010, BaggieMike wrote:
23 - He is basically telling l'pool that they are stuffed whatever the result of their game - which will lead to them being confused and losing - hes a sly old fox that fergie.
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Does that mean George Clooney will do the voice over in the animated film of Fergie Mike?
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27 - we have yet to invent the technology that could create an animatiom with a high enough frame rate to capture all of Fergies numberous gestures of disgust - or keep up with his chewing jaw
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#21 No need to apologise Jacks I just find music a highly contentious issue. Because Chris is a former music journalist and does bring up references I do like to reciprocate. PS I wouldn't have known the answer to your question, I had a feeling about The Damned but the song title escaped me. :)
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20. redandblack: If you recall, my predictions are invariably wrong, so that's you nailed on for a CL spot. Very unlikely they'll miss out, but if I'd said 'conceivably playing Leeds one week and Sampdoria the next' wouldn't quite have had the same impact.
21. JacksfromBuxton: And a fine song it is too - although must admit I prefer Neat Neat Neat. Met Captain Sensible once when he was performing 'Wot' at some kids' programme hosted by Bob Carolgees at Alton Towers. As luck would have it (didn't know he'd be there) I was wearing my Damned t-shirt and he came over for a natter, Top bloke.
22. JacksfromBuxton: You're right - could name every single Cup and result from 1970-87 but would struggle to name the last three. Could be something to do with age of course. Last really decent Cup final I saw was Liverpool-West Ham in 2006.
26. BaggieMike: Yes, very few people I've heard who are not delighted for Fulham. Helps that their manager is such a nice chap.
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George Clooney as Alex Ferguson? Oh dear...
Rafa could be played by Andrew Sachs? (we'd need to dig out some old Fawlty Towers footage though or he'd be slightly too old...)
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"Incredibly, their other famous supporter, Lily Allen, chose not to tweet about her club's finest hour, although the word on the street is that she's busy writing their Cup final song, working title FLM."
HAHA - that is shocking, Chris, truly shocking!
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Congratulations to Bournemouth, who joined Notts County and Rochdale in League One, while it's squeaky bum time for Grimsby, who are clinging on to their league status by their fingertips. Their precarious position sparked an extraordinary online rant from Mariners fan Poojah on Grimsby site The Fishy, most of which is unrepeatable, although it would be rude not to give you a (heavily edited) taste:
"For starters, work can (get lost). If they think I'm going to be there on Monday morning they've got another thing coming. No way am I going in to spend time dealing with (idiots) that I can barely stand being with when I'm in a good mood....
"Dad, you can (go away). This is your fault. Your idea. You introduced me to this shower of (manure). 'Come with me to Blundell Park,' you said, 'Come and support the boys.' What could I do? I was (flipping) four, what choice did I have? Why not get me hooked on heroin whilst you were at it? I could have gone with mum shopping for bras and knickers at British Home Stores, but no, you knew best....
"The girlfriend can definitely (go away). Her best attempt at consolation - "I don't know why you're bothered; you knew they were (rubbish) anyway". Yes love, but they're MY (rubbish) team.....
"The radio can (go away) . On my way home from the match, whilst driving down the M180, I caught three completely separate stations playing 'Down' by Jay Sean at the exact same (flipping) time. The song's the best part of a year old, how the (hell) does that happen by coincidence?!"
That, on the other hand, is quality banter! 5 stars!!!
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Fulham side in 75 were in the old 2nd division and were loaded with old favourites who were now at the twilight of their careers such as Bobby Moore and Alan Mullery. On the day West Ham won at a canter (apart from Billy Bonds who never did anything at less than a sprint).
Interestingly the 22 players that started that game were 21 Englishmen and 1 Irishman. Both subs were english too (yes, only 1 per side). Can't imagine that happening now, and slightly surprised it even happened then as most teams had a healthy scots and welsh contingent at that time.
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Shocking they removed the link to the fishy website, guess the old fashioned way of searching for Poojah and 'Dear World' is the only way forward.
30 - Yeah thats a factor as well, even all the other football managers like him, some of the comments are great - see another BBC article - dont want to post link i might get modded again.
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32. Rovers Return: Thanks very much! I'll take that as a compliment. Ahem.
33. Rovers Return: It's a belter, isn't it?
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Chris,what was the name of the show?My old middle school did a televised childrens show at Alton Towers back in 83ish.Racking my brains,and racking google,and I can't place it.Help appreciated!!
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37. JacksfromBuxton: Not 100% sure but 'Hold Tight' is ringing a bell for some reason.
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37. JacksfromBuxton: Just had a look and looks like that is the one. http://www.ukgameshows.com/ukgs/Hold_Tight
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"32. Rovers Return: Thanks very much! I'll take that as a compliment. Ahem."
You can't beat a bit of banter, mate. Great blog! Brightens up my Friday evenings at work!
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40. Rovers Return: You're right, you can't! Have a good weekend old son.
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And to you! Edinburgh for the rugby - here I come!
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Chris,that's the one!!thanks for finding it.
Blackminster Middle School,your fame was here!!
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Jaqcks
Are you and CC just good friends or am I missing something?
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tone,we get on ok.Is this you being under cover cid again?
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20. redandblack: If you recall, my predictions are invariably wrong, so that's you nailed on for a CL spot. Very unlikely they'll miss out, but if I'd said 'conceivably playing Leeds one week and Sampdoria the next' wouldn't quite have had the same impact.
Cheers Chris - I was about to ask you to tip Leeds to beat the mighty Addicks tomorrow...
I'm officially an Addick until tomorrow and and Owl until Sunday...
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45. At 7:36pm on 30 Apr 2010, JacksfromBuxton wrote:
tone,we get on ok.Is this you being under cover cid again?
--------
I may have thru the night but can't officially say
btw good blog CC
GO MILLERS
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Quality article as ever Chris :)
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It's been a great season for Fulham so far and I really hope they go on and win the Europa League this season. It is just a shame that Liverpool could not finish Atletico Madrid off to set up an all English final.
http://the-fa-premier-league.blogspot.com/
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