Quotes of the week
Yes, it's that time of the week again when we discover what sporting folk have been saying, football fans have been chanting and announcers announcing. Please add your gems at the bottom of this blog and we'll include the best next week. If you're still not blogged up and insist on going down the old school route, use the postform by clicking this link.
"He'd clean my shoes, make me cups of tea and even came to one of my fan club afternoons...he may be a global superstar but has he ever sold out Discotheque Royale on a Sunday afternoon?"
Lee Sharpe on the days when he was king and David Beckham was his bootboy.
"He's stopped putting things in his throat basically. It's quite simple. I'll take a leaf out of his book!"
Steve Bruce on the secret to Andy Reid's new slimline look.
"Phil's having a Guinness in his office at the moment - and he deserves one."
Hull assistant Brian Horton explains why Phil Brown would not give any interviews after the last-gasp win over Stoke.
He's world champion - not a lot of people know that
"It's a dream come true. I'm gonna party baby - party all night long."
David Haye turns into Lionel Richie after being crowned world champion.
"It wasn't so much taming the Beast - more like playing with a tabby cat."
And dismisses the challenge of 7ft giant Nikolay Valuev.
"Old ladies are worrying for my health and wishing me luck against this big Bully."
It's the blue-rinse brigade what won it for Haye, following his revelation on the eve of the fight.
"That's pretty special. Look at that fella!"
Nick Faldo examines his medal after being knighted by the Queen.
"Someone texted me saying he's a bit like I used to be, but more athletic, funnier and better-looking."
Martin Johnson, not jealous of new England second row Courtney Lawes.
"I cannot believe the decision (of the referee). Okay, it is human error, but it was one of the worst in my lifetime."
Alex Ferguson is not best pleased after seeing Darren Fletcher booked wrongly for diving in the Champions League clash with CSKA Moscow.
"You lose your faith in the refereeing sometimes...it was a bad one."
Guess who after defeat at Chelsea.
"12 men."
Wayne Rooney mouths his feelings to the cameras at Stamford Bridge.
"If you walk through a storm you hold your head up high, so that is what we will do."
Rafa Benitez Never Walks Alone.
"It is true. I got the injury at 19 when I was climbing a tree looking for a neighbour's cat. I ended up as a hero in my village because I saved the cat.
Unfortunately, I also fell out of the tree and injured my knee."
Leonid Slutski, Juande Ramos' successor as CSKA Moscow coach, on the bizarre end to his playing career.
"It is nice to be out on the golf course, you can only rearrange the furniture at home so many times."
Ryder Cup star Paul Casey abandons feng shui on his return from injury.
Flintoff can pick 'n' mix his games these days
"I'd like to play in Australia. I wanted to go when I was 16 but my mum wouldn't let me so I went to work in Woolworth's instead."
Freddie Flintoff - finally big enough to do what he wants.
AND SOME FROM YOU
"I don't think it struck his arm, it was more his elbow."
Joe Royle, ESPN commentary during Wolves v Arsenal. (Tink, UK).
"If you don't score at this level, unfortunately you aren't going to get a win."
Steve Bruce. At what level can you win without scoring, Steve? (Nick Dwyer, Staffordshire).
"At this level you've got to score goals to win matches."
Mark Lawrenson commenting on 5 live after Andriy Voronin's miss in the Lyon-Liverpool match.
(Ian Pilbeam, Scotland).
"David Wright's second-half goal at Portman Road on Saturday secured the Sussex side's first victory..."
In the Metro newspaper on Monday No wonder Ipswich are struggling to win if they are going to the wrong county. (CASROB).
"I will ask the medical staff to take as long as they need to try to get him back into shape as quickly as they can."
Fulham boss Roy Hodgson on Damian Duff.
"A racehorse ain't always gonna be the same, you've just got to be consistent and try and make it the same. We're the same, we're racehorses -- we're all racehorses really -- we're just trying to do our jobs properly."
Burton defender Guy Branston's insight into their current performance. (Richard Cripps, UK).
"That's a foul on Ivanovic and the referee blows up straight away."
Heard on the MOTD commentary of Bolton v Chelsea. (Jude, UK).
Do Chelsea's dynamic duo float your boat?
"I think if you asked the other 19 managers who would they choose, 10 would take Anelka and Drogba and 10 would take Rooney and Berbatov."
Andy Gray when asked which of the two striking partnerships are better. (Adam Moynihan, Ireland).
"I tell the players, when you have a headache you go and take a tablet. When you are on the back foot, the football industry is full of vultures so it's like when you have a headache, take a tablet. A win will be like a tablet."
Gold Coast United manager Miron Bleiberg attempting a Mourinho-ism. (Matty, Australia).
"Hang on a second lads, there's a wasp here, lets wait for it to go away."
Referee just before scrummage at a Chobham v Weybridge Vandals under 16s game. (James, England). Weybridge Vandals?! Ed.
"Kompany and company have a chaotic moment!"
Martin Tyler when Man City failed to clear against Fulham. (Pramod, India).
"United's victory sends them into the next stage of the Champions League."
Caption under the picture on the BBC website. But I thought 3-3 was a draw, not a win. (Libby Curran, USA).
"If he's lied, and he's confessed he lied, so he's obviously lied and he lied under oath."
Wada director general David Howman thinks Andre Agassi might have lied. (Feloola Elizabeth Stanley, UK).
"Former Australia winger Lote Tuqiri came on for his first Leicester start on 55 minutes."
BBC Sport Website. (Jonny Smith, Northern Ireland).
"I don't think the ref heard the linesman put his flag up there!"
Sky Sports commentator in the Barca game. (Adam).
"Vennegoor of Hesselink's second goal of the future earned Hull a critical three points."
Caption below the photo in the Hull-Stoke article on this site, quickly edited out but worth noting for posterity! (ShinyDavidHowell).
''The referee seems to have swallowed his whistle."
Commentator on the Milan-Real Madrid clash after the referee didn't call a number of fouls. (Billmarkenya).
"The U's playing in all leather. Leather?! I mean't yellow..."
Neil Kelly, BBC Essex. Bromley v Colchester United. (Joebo, UK).
Isn't that.....no, it can't be
"And Madrid are to make a change here, and it's the lesser-spotted Ruud van Nistelrooy."
Commentary during the Milan-Madrid game. (Mark Spivey, England).
"Man City will be aiming to finish in the top four this season, but anything other than that will be a bonus."
Alan Shearer on MOTD - implying they'd rather finish outside the top four!
(Adam Brown, Huddersfield).
CHANTS OF THE WEEK
"Are you Sandra in Disguise?"
Following Darren Bent's penalty miss at White Hart Lane, referring to Harry Redknapp's wife. Last season, Redknapp said of Bent 'My missus could have scored that'.
"Shearer Shearer Shearer!"
More from Spurs fans to Sunderland. (Sanjay, London).
"Can we play you twice a week?"
Chelsea fans to Bolton after beating them 4-0 in the Carling Cup at Stamford Bridge and in the Premier League at the Reebok.
(Oliver Todd, UK).
"We like Eboue-boue,
We like Eboue-boue,
We like Eboue-boue,
We like E...BOUE!"
Arsenal fans salute Emmanuel Eboue to the tune of Reel 2 Real's I Like To Move It.
(Alex Wilkinson, UK).
"No Woodman - No cry."
At Wycombe v Brighton,when Wycombe took a second-half lead after Craig Woodman's first-half dismissal.
(Thom Hoffman, England).
"There's only one Gareth Southgate!"
Crystal Palace fans to Middlesbrough supporters.
(Fred Simon, England).
"You're just a small town in Welling!"
Northwich Victoria fans to Charlton in the first-round FA Cup tie.
Callum Maclean, England
"We're not bottom any more!"
Ipswich fans after the Peterborough score was shown on the big screen at Reading.
(Stephen Bailey,Ipswich).
Shhh - don't tell Capello
"Bobby for England."
Fulham fans get over-excited after Bobby Zamora scores against Liverpool.
"12 men - you've only got 12 men."
After Fulham weren't given a penalty against Liverpool.
"11 men - you've only got 11 men."
After Degen got sent off.
"10 men - you've only got 10 men."
After Carrager's red.
(I'mTallerThanCrouch).
"Neil has had a hip replacement!"
Plymouth Argyle fans question the age of Doncaster keeper Neil Sullivan. (Adam).
"I am a Fleetwood fan,
And I come from Fleetwood Town,
I know what I want and I know how to get it,
I wanna destroy Telford FC,
Cause, I wanna be Cod Army."
The real words to the Fleetwood Song featured last week to the tune of Anarchy in the UK. (niallthecod).
STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENTS OF THE WEEK
"The referee will make a decision after half-time whether to play the rest of the game due to fog. By the way, the score is 0-0."
At half-time during the Lewes v St Albans match, where you couldn't see from one side of the pitch to the the half-way line. The match was called off.
(Joe Betts, England).
"Number 39, Pascal Chambimba!"
Stadium announcer at Old Trafford going through the Blackburn line-up. (Chris, UK).
TWEET OF THE WEEK
"Yessssssssssssss."
Andy Murray when John and Edward survived the public vote on X-Factor.
(Shiraz, Harrow).
I am a journalist with BBC Sport, dealing with the more offbeat stories doing the rounds. I am a QPR fan - and also quite fond of football. If our new-found wealth brings success I'll be happy to tell anyone exactly where I was when we were sh... rubbish - row J seat 139. 
© MMIX~RS~q~RS~~RS~z~RS~13~RS~)
Comments
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Andy Murray is a John and Edward fan???
that sums up what i have been saying about the guy for ages... absolute idiot
I now feel more comfortable in my hating of him!
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If Alex Ferguson has the self control to not make any comment to the BBC why can't he show the same control when discussing referees???
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Chant: "There's only one Benítez" - Blues fans after Christian Benítez equalises at Anfield
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The deafening silence from the Liverpool fans after the Birmingham fans' "Benitez" chant...
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@2 - It's not self control Ferguson shows with the BBC, it's pig headedness! It's interesting tho that he was able to appear on the BBC Sports Personality of the Year tribute to Sir Bobby Robson a couple of years ago!!
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Is Fergusson the only manager in the country to be able to make scathing remarks about an official and not be severely sensured. It appears that he is free to comment about how bad a referee is and how his team have been unfairly cheated of a result, and yet anyone else is fined, banned from the touchline or any number of other pernalties.
Is the FA panering to Fergusson or are they frightened of him
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Following the aborted attempt by UEFA to ban Eduardo for diving for Arsenal to earn a penalty against Celtic, are they going to be doing the same for the even more obvious cheating that took place by Bent for Sunderland on Saturday and Ngog Liverpool on Monday. And it is also surprising that Ronaldo was never banned for diving versus everybody he has ever played against
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Could someone please ask Rangers and Celtic if they wish to transfer to the English league, would they wish to join the league if they had to start on the bottom rung of the ladder, just as AFC Wimbledon or FC United of Manchester had to do?
If they did do this, maybe I would agree that they could join, but the chances of them wishing to join anywhere outside the Premier League are as likely as a snowball surviving in hell
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2. At 12:53pm on 11 Nov 2009, Aston wall penalty wrote:
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Why do you continuously feel the need to keep chipping away at SAF?
Even on an article that hardly even mentions the blokes name, you still find a certain urge to have a pop?
Give it up.
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8. At 1:54pm on 11 Nov 2009, davidtheparent wrote:
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David - this is a good point, I honestly think they would only settle for the prem. But my opinion is that they wouldn't cope.
Even the likes of the Stokes and the Porthsmouths would take all 3 points against them in my opinion.
I would gamble on one of them finising in the bottom 3, if this ever did happen.
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# 5
Don’t be a plank. Ferguson respectfully put his issues with the BBC to one side for a night, so that he was able to celebrate a much deserved award for the great Sir Bobby. If memory serves me right, Sir Bobby was delighted Ferguson presented him with the award.
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Chant - "Gambians, Gambians, Gambians!"
Sutton United fans at Hereford after the BBC Sport website gets Sutton's nickname wrong a pre-match article. The nickname has now made it to Wikipedia.
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Re Aston wall penalty @ 12.53 lets not kid ourselves that Sir Alex is demonstrating self control here. What he is doing as acting like a spoilt kid who has had his dummy taken off him. He is demonstrating nothing more than complete disrespect for every football fan in the land, Red or not, by sending out various puppets to pass on his views just because he can't control his temper.
Both Big Sam and Sandra's husband realised that sulking has a sell by date
All in all quite a shame as I think he'd fit in pretty well with those less than cheery old chaps on Beeb2's 'Grumpy Old Men......'
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On Chants of the week - That Fleetwood song is old. We've been singing our own version ('I am a Cheltenham fan, and im from the Carlsberg stand, I know what i want and i know how 2 get it, i wanna destroy Gloucester scumm, coz i will always be CTFC') for ages and we originally nicked it from FC United fans
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Heard on Radio 5
We kicked off 5 minutes late here due to the one minute silence for Rememberance Day
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8. At 1:54pm on 11 Nov 2009, davidtheparent wrote:
Could someone please ask Rangers and Celtic if they wish to transfer to the English league, would they wish to join the league if they had to start on the bottom rung of the ladder, just as AFC Wimbledon or FC United of Manchester had to do?
If they did do this, maybe I would agree that they could join, but the chances of them wishing to join anywhere outside the Premier League are as likely as a snowball surviving in hell
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Celtic's Chief Executive has said on many occasions that Celtic would be happy to do just that. Maybe actually knowing the facts within this whole tedious argument would change your views.
As for a quote, the 'Stating the obvious' award must surely go to Real Madrid's manager Manuel Pellegrini who said of being knocked out of the Copa del Rey to Alcorcon:
"To lose to a team in the third division can't be considered an achievement"
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No.9
The article'hardly' mentioned anyone, just lots of people mentioned a little so something , hardly mentioned' has to be discussed, doesn't it?
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Leo oh oh
Utter tripe, Celtic or Rangers would never start in the lowest tier of English football. It's all about the money and how would your poor wee souls get on with 'other teams holding you back' in lower divisions.
England, don't go anywhere near these pathetic teams and their biggoted fans.
Leo oh oh, what did you think of Sky having to mute the volume so that your IRA chants couldn't be heard on the TV during the minute silence. Disgraceful.
And all this begging from a team with a large amount of support who pine after RoI and hate England.
Don't make me laugh. Well, too late actually but you get my point.
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I forgot to say, I'm a Hibs fan from Scotland...
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I'm tired of Fergie's obligatory referee rant myself and I am a United fan. I also watch the Spanish La Liga every week and truth be told, the standard of officiating in England currently is appalling!
Two things I noticed
1. The referees in England seem to be lacking some confidence recently and don't seem to be sure whether their decisions are correct most of the time. Mark Clattenburg though has impressed me in recent matches
2. They don't seem to have technical knowledge of the game that the Spanish referees display admirably in two areas
a. Knowing when advantage play really IS advantage play!
b. Detecting those supposedly 'slight' fouls (pulling, shoving, putting players
off balance so they cant properly head or shoot etc.) which all reslt in a
denial of clear goal-scoring chances
3. They are too easily influenced by the crowd.
4. Inconsistency. Brandishing the yellow when the should have a word with the
players or showing the yellow for one offence and then not showing it for
exactly the same offence (maybe for not wanting to send off a player or some
other foolish reason)
I know that everything (decisions, luck, good fortune, rub of the green and bad luck) will even out at the end of the season, bt it would be good to see excellent refereeing as well
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Correction
I'm tired of Fergie's obligatory referee rant myself and I am a United fan. I also watch the Spanish La Liga every week and truth be told, the standard of officiating in England currently is appalling!
Things I have noted
1. The referees in England seem to be lacking some confidence recently and don't seem to be sure whether their decisions are correct most of the time. Mark Clattenburg though has impressed me in recent matches
2. They don't seem to have technical knowledge of the game that the Spanish referees display admirably in two areas
a. Knowing when advantage play really IS advantage play!
b. Detecting those supposedly 'slight' fouls (pulling, shoving, putting players
off balance so they cant properly head or shoot etc.) which all reslt in a
denial of clear goal-scoring chances
3. They are too easily influenced by the crowd.
4. Inconsistency. Brandishing the yellow when the should have a word with the
players or showing the yellow for one offence and then not showing it for
exactly the same offence (maybe for not wanting to send off a player or some
other foolish reason)
I know that everything (decisions, luck, good fortune, rub of the green and bad luck) will even out at the end of the season, bt it would be good to see excellent refereeing as well
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@21 Agree with all that except for one thing:
"I know that everything (decisions, luck, good fortune, rub of the green and bad luck) will even out at the end of the season"
The probability of that is very small.
@15 Thanks for that one, I heard it but forgot what the exact wording was.
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Jon Champion on ESPN: Who do you think will replace the injured Riera?
Chris Waddle: Well, it`s not gonna be Gerrard. It definitely wont be Gerrard. I can`t see him coming on.
Jon Champion: So Liverpool send on Steven Gerrard for the injured Riera
This was in the midweek game at Anfield. Waddle knows his stuff!
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Before the Chelsea Man U game Colin Murray said "you can hear the hush of expectancy buzzing round the ground"
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your all saddos
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Without wishing to prove your point Tom, surely "you're all saddos" would be better?
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13. At 2:39pm on 11 Nov 2009, Keith Johnson wrote:
Re Aston wall penalty @ 12.53 lets not kid ourselves that Sir Alex is demonstrating self control here. What he is doing as acting like a spoilt kid who has had his dummy taken off him. He is demonstrating nothing more than complete disrespect for every football fan in the land, Red or not, by sending out various puppets to pass on his views just because he can't control his temper.
____________________________________________________________
You are trying to talk about something you know nothing about. Ferguson has a long-running feud with the BBC as a result of an investigative documentary made by the them, with his son being one of the subjects.
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20. At 6:36pm on 11 Nov 2009, DazzlinDapsy wrote:
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Yeh I'm agreed on that one. Clattenburg will be one of the top refs in the world in a few years time. Him and Webb are our best at the moment I think; Webb most likely to represent us at the World Cup.
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Those of you laying into Fergie (what's new?):
If an organisation accused your son of fraud, then after this was proved to be completely unsubstantiated, refused to either retract the accusation or apologise, exactly how much of your time would you continue to spend cosying up to that organisation?
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Tranmere caretaker manager Les Parry told BBC Radio Merseyside:
"We're going to be the Haarlem Globetrotters over the next week or so with a trip to Norwich followed by to (two?) trips to Orient."
I didn't realise Norwich and Leyton were so cosmopolitan
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"Wolverhampton Wanderers are interested in Gillingham striker Simeon Williamson and are preparing a £1.5m bid."
From BBC's very own gossip column. Wasn't aware Gillingham had an Olympic sprinter on their books...
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Taken from the BBC golf section this morning - Rose stands a great chance if he's playing twice!
Rose maintains Florida challenge
SECOND ROUND LEADERBOARD:
-12 J Rose (Eng) -10 J Rose (Eng), G McNeill (US)
-8 T Pernice Jr (US), C DiMarco (US), M Weibring (US) Selected others: -7 G Owen (Eng) -3 B Davis (Eng) MC D Duval (US)
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Heard on Sky Sports coverage of England v Australia rugby league final
"The England players need to have self believe in their team-mates"
well which is it?
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"The world came, the world saw and we conquered" Banner at the match between host Nigeria and Switzerland at the FIFA U17 world Cup final.
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"Literally, when Michelle Wie is atop the leaderboard it's like night and day and that's star power," - LPGA spokesman David Higdon
Definition of 'Literally' - actually; without exaggeration or inaccuracy
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