Alexandra Burke ft. Pitbull - 'All Night Long'
Right, this is a pickle. As a result of prolongued exposure, I am going to have to be extremely nice about a song which features Pitbull, and for once, I don't mean it in a kind of half-shrugged "well this is perfectly fine for now, passes the time agreeably, but I probably won't play this at an important family gathering" sort of way. I mean it in a "blimey, I'm enjoying this song so much I'm going to play it again as soon as it stops, AND tell my friends about it" kind of way.
Yes, the same Pitbull who had that unsavoury song about making love in a hotel room. How can I ever look myself in the ears again?*
(Here's the video. They're going to have to tidy up with a SHOVEL.)
He's not really learned from his past mistakes, if his guest moment here is anything to go by. He doesn't even seem to know whose record he is a guest on. "Alexandra!", he yelps, before pausing as if to read something off a cue card, "Burke, that is!".
Oh yeah dude, you are SMOOOOOOTH. You're not even in the video, so SHUSH.
On the plus side...dear Lord the PLUS SIDE...well it's just a brilliant song. It's sung brilliantly, with brilliant barking-angel harmonies and brilliant rumble-tum verses and brilliant cloudbustingly euphoric choruses. Alexandra sounds every inch the disco diva - by which I mean she sounds torn apart by the wonder of the emotions she is experiencing, even though lyrically, those emotions amount to nothing more than a simple description of meeting someone you fancy at a party.
In this way, it's a song which will sit next to Kelis's 'Acapella' very nicely indeed - astonishing singers translating the experience of being overcome by strong feelings. It's an emotional state we can all relate to.
I, for example, am preparing a similarly overwhelmed torch/disco preposterthon entitled 'BAD DOG, PITBULL, IN YOUR BED'. It's the only language he understands.
That Grape Juice says: "I'm still waiting to hear that 'mind-blowing' track I just know Ms. Burke has in her to deliver."
BBC Newsround says: "Her voice is earthy and gravelly, and really cool on this single."
Digitalspy says: "You'll barely have time to knock back your G&T before the urge to hit the dancefloor kicks in."
* Apart from 'with a periscope', obv.