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Beyoncé - 'Halo'

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Fraser McAlpine | 09:44 UK time, Wednesday, 1 April 2009

BeyonceHang on, this can't be right. I thought this was supposed to be Beyoncé...y'know, Destiny's Child, Austin Powers, goes out with Jay-Z, can sing a bit...but doesn't Beyoncé always bang on about how rubbish men are? That's her USP, her MO, her OMG, and occasionally - I'm thinking of the 'If I Were A Boy' video here - her LOL.

And yet, what is this song about? It's about being so helplessly in love that you feel like you're sunbathing in scorching rays of pure lovely, only there's no chance of being burned, because you're being shielded by his or her special aura, which offers better protection than Factor 900 suncream and a floppy hat.

So, what's the deal? Is it an extravagent April Fool's gag on the world? Has she had a change of heart? Is the 'you' in the song actually not a boy at all (because boys are rubbish) but a girl? Katy Perry, have you been mucking about with Beyonce's songs again?

(Here's the video. Look! A puppy!)

But if this is a prank, it turns out the joke's on her, because it actually rather suits her to be nice for a change. I mean sure, this song was ripped off heavily inspired by 'No Air' by Jordin Sparks, and the lack of half-measures in the lyrics are a little hard to take, but that possibly says more about me the listener than it does about the song. Some people really like to be swept away by over-the-top metaphors, in much the same way that a flea might enjoy a rollercoaster*.

There's an unintentionally funny bit, just before the final push into enormous power ballad massiveness. Someone is trying to recreate that climactic '80s drum breakdown thing, the hallmark of all quality power-balladry. It's a one bar roam around the drum kit, mainly on the tom-toms, which is supposed to make the neck-hairs stand up when the music comes roaring back in. Phil Collins was a MASTER at this, and even if he's not available, I know a gorilla with time on his hands who could probably have a go.

Sadly, in these budget conscious, power saving, crunchy credit times, it's less of a thunderous roll around a drum kit of monolithic hugeness, and more of a kitten jumping from one bongo to another. Hardly seems worth stopping the music to highlight it, really.

I don't really know that gorilla either. Had you going though, didn't I? April Fool!

Four starsDownload: Out now
CD Released: November 3th

(Fraser McAlpine)

*OK, so that was a similie, but at least I tried, dammit!


  • Comment number 1.

    Nice shout, its so similar to No Air its not even funny.

  • Comment number 2.

    Is there any truth in the rumour that a Miss Leona Lewis was offered this song but turned it down?

  • Comment number 3.

    *I* heard that Leona's producers wanted the song but Beyonce's producers snagged it right before their faces... Pesky producers.

  • Comment number 4.

    Hmm... say what you will about Jordin Sparks and drum rolls. I think this is an amazing song, I especially like the high bit - "hit me like a ray of sun". It's really beautiful, its what Beyonce does best and its probably my fave beyonce song ever. Way better than single ladies (annoying) and if I were a boy (overplayed, bland, annoying).

  • Comment number 5.

    And all anyone needed to do was buy the Jordin Sparks album and make up some new words.

    It's not rocket surgery, people!

  • Comment number 6.

    It's a great song and I'm perhaps being dumb here but I don't get the No Air reference?

    Beyonce is a fantastic singer and this song really suits her.

    I also heard that Leona turned this song down...I'd be a bit gutted if I were Beyonce though...having to accept Reality Show Singers reject songs. That's if Beyonce's an artist snob though...

  • Comment number 7.

    I agree DANNY this is a great song....... now in the TOP 5.

    I thought the IF I WERE A BOY and SINGLE LADIES songs and videos marked a real return to form for BEYONCE.

    Her performance of LISTEN with ALEXANDRA on X FACTOR was breath taking and helped MISS BURKE win the contest . Yes it was that good !

    The quality of her three singles means that her I AM...... SASHA FIERCE album has now sold 505,410 copies in the UK alone !!!!!

    She is being managed and marketed extremely well !


  • Comment number 8.


    (oh no another prediction from the spirit )

  • Comment number 9.

    In reply to ANDYTEG......

    HALO was written by :


    So we know she had some hand in it.

    RYAN TEDDER co wrote BLEEDING LOVE for LEONA LEWIS.... he is the lead singer of ONE REPUBLIC and obviously has a real talent for writing TOP 10 SONGS.... ( as well as having a brilliant voice ! )

    Can anyone help ANDY with some more ?


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