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Oasis - 'I'm Outta Time'

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Fraser McAlpine | 09:27 UK time, Wednesday, 19 November 2008

OasisYou're outta time, y'say? That's so funny because I'm outta space. I think we may have an infestation of continuum pirates. Call the exterminators!*

Meanwhile, back on planet Oasis, it's still the late '60s, and the modern world has yet to arrive. This is why the beings known as 'mods' dress like old duffers, and listening to music in stereo is considered to be a revolution in sound. This is also why mellotrons are still considered to be very exciting new instruments, the internet is just a way of describing where to put a hooked fish, and texting is the name of a panda in a cowboy hat.

The leader of the Oasis race, a charismatic and fiery soul called Li-Yam, has issued a musical communication, a plea for all races to understand what is going on on their home planet, and how every day is a struggle for survival against the forces of time.

He refers back to his people's history, their travels, their ill-fated attempted to start an airline, and their daily battle with paranoia - a genetic disorder common to all tribes on the planet, most commonly displayed in a suspicion of anything new and a tendency to lash out.

Li-Yam is concerned that their turbulent past has created bad feeling within the galaxy, and is worried that this may leave them vulnerable to attack. Would this be a popular move, he asks, and would it be better if Oasis were entirely overrun by The Axes Of Evil (a coalition of warlike races, led by the armies of Trivium).

But, being the wise and venerated leader he is, Li-Yam delivers his plea for universal aid in a sleepy, soothing voice, over dreamy music, with the idea that he is leading the Oasis race away from aggression and into a more enlightened place, where that arrogant, provocative strut is replaced with a thoughtful grin and a welcoming wink.

Who could resist? Certainly not me. I've signed up to the Space Rocketeers, and we launch at dawn. Wish me luck!

Four starsDownload: Out now
CD Released:
November 24th
www.oasisinet.com

(Fraser McAlpine)

* Cribbing jokes off Friends. That's got to be a new low.

Ah well. As Julian Cope's mate once said "we are all of us in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the kerb".

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