See this? It's a lovely doll of the popular singing star Sophie Ellis Bextor. What's that? It's not her? Oh, OK. So it's a suspiciously pink Alesha Dixon. No...hang on, Katie Holmes? Angelina Jolie?
Actually, none of the above is true. This is a brand new doll which has just been created in the 'likeness' of Katy Perry. Seriously, KATY PERRY.
Now, the launch of a new pop doll is always a big event (big from a doll's perspective, anyway), especially a doll which allows the children in your house to re-enact the basic scenario to such Perry hits as 'I Kissed A Girl', with the help from some suitably adventurous Barbies. But there's an issue which does need to be cleared up, before we can rush off to the toy shop, pocket money in hand.
And that issue is this: Why do these dolls never ever quite manage to look anything like the people they are supposed to?
Come with me now, I feel a quiz coming on...
OK, here's a selection of pictures of actual pop star dolls, which I have shamelessly stolen off the web. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to name who on Earth these plastic people are supposed to be.
Answers in the comments box, please...
POP DOLL NUMBER 1:
This one isn't as easy as you might think. Nor is it as hard as I might be making it sound. Let's just say it's a girl pop star, and it's not Jordin Sparks, or indeed Jordan...
POP DOLL NUMBER 2:
No, it's not Nicki Chapman, former judge of Pop Idol. It's not Baby Spice either. But who IS it?
POP DOLL NUMBER 3:
To make matters even more confusing, the lady this doll is based on doesn't look like this any more. Even her skin is a different colour. And those clothes are FAR too modern. Any ideas?
POP DOLL NUMBER 4:
It's not just the female pop stars who have to suffer the indignity of these miniature rubbish dopplegangers. Here's a doll which might cause Panic At The Disco, but could just as easily be the new drummer in Oasis. None of these facts are intended as actual clues, of course...
POP DOLL NUMBER 5:
If you were wondering what B*Witched were up to these days, wonder no more! They're clearly modelling for dolls like this. But if it's not actually Keavy or Edele, who the hell IS it?
POP DOLL NUMBER 6:
Here's a nice easy one. Although the part of [insert chart star's name here] is tonight being played by Lando Calrissian, or Ike Turner...or Tom Selleck.
POP DOLL NUMBER 7:
"Hello, this is the Samaritans...If you've been affected by issues such as divorce, stress at work, hair loss, depression or repeated beatings from a small child or infant, press one now..."
POP DOLL NUMBER 8:
The irony is, this doll looks more like Katy Perry than the Katy Perry doll does. Such is the fickle nature of plastic moulding...
Now, Kid Skeletor and pals, say goodbye to the nice boys and girls, eh?
(All of these dolls are available via a search engine or auction website near you...)