Chart Report - 24/02/08
ChartSnipe: Duffy? Mercy? What is this, a No.1 record or a convention of the dwarves who lived next to the little house Snow White stayed in? What? You didn't see the other house? Well, I spose It didn't really feature in the film, that much, but there was Duffy (he's a bit rubbish), Mercy (can't spell 'Murky', is THAT dim), Dashful (always busy), Slappy (the bully, always has a cameraphone in one hand), Breezy (flatulent), Frumpy (needs fashion advice) and Sock (a bit of a knitwit). Maybe it'll be in the sequel... (FM)
2 - H Two O Ft. Platnum - 'What's It Gonna Be'
ChartSnipe: I tell you, this has got to be the most credible thing any former member of Steps* has put their name to since...well, ever! I mean I don't know if the name is H Two like Terminator 2, and the fella in this band is some kind of H sequel, or if it's the real H himself. Either way, respect is due for such a radical change in musical direction. Whatever next, Lisa Scott Lee goes metal? (FM)
3 - Nickelback - 'Rock Star'
ChartSnipe: Proof, if proof were needed, that all you need to do to inject a bit of interest into your flagging moose-rock career (it's all in the bellowing, see) is to unveil a hitherto hidden sense of humour. Of course, once the door to smiley pastures is opened, it's hard to fully shut it again. Give it a couple of years and they'll be doing over-earnest, mooey versions of Weird Al Yankovic's greatest hits. What fun! (FM)
ChartSnipe: Hey, Basshunter? Are you finding that people are missing you Now You're Gone off the No.1 spot? HAHAHAHAHAHA! High five, anyone? (FM)
5 - Kylie Minogue - 'Wow'
ChartSnipe: Depending on your tolerance for that bit immediately after the chorus (you know the bit I mean, they named the song after it, after all), this is a song which either cements Kylie's amazing return to form since her battle with cancer, or it has a title which begins with a silent 'w'. (FM)