Eileen and the Tale of Teddy Terror

Wednesday 29 August 2012, 18:46

Amy Thurgood Amy Thurgood

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Eileen

Ever heard the fable about the happy squirrel who tried to do too much? The happy little squirrel decided to help everyone else with their business because she was so fabulously excellent at everything she put her mind to. One day, she saw that her baby-daddy was having problems with a nasty bully who was extorting money from him and so she took the most sensible course of action and...organised a back-alley drug deal! Really Eileen? Really? At what point did this seem like a good idea to you?

Never mind that her plan not only involved having poor wee Stevie buying her smack, but there was a whole second part that involved her sneaking up on Shady Sean and planting his own smack in his pockets! Who on earth could have seen that plan going wrong? But of course, poor Eileen had no idea what on earth she was getting herself into and really thought she could outwit Shieldinch's Criminal Mastermind. But never underestimate a man who is chauffeured by a bunch of heavies. It was a scary moment there when Sean cornered her in her own house, scary enough for Eileen to go and admit to Will that she decided to try her hand at entrapment. It looked like proper sour grapes when Will had to break it to her that she wasn't above the law. Ouch. That must be hard for her to swallow. So what can we learn from Eileen's experience, kids? Shady Sean isn't a Teddy man...he'd much prefer a Mr Frosty.

But it was poor Stevie who was bearing the brunt of it this week. Despite angrily chewing on his nails and spitting out 'No Comment' when Will accused him of being a drug fiend (again), he looked so sad in his cold prison cell. Didn't you just want to climb into the pokey with him and give him a great big hug? Anyone? No? Just us then. Losing his job was just the cherry on the cake! What's going to happen to the Brodies now without his valuable bartending income? Well, at least Leyla's cut down on her booze expenses.

Speaking of, Leyla has given us a crash course in things NOT to say at your very first AA meeting. In summation, anything involving what an awful drunk everyone is except for you, laughing at the prospect of having to keep yourself sober and, numero uno, telling your sponsor that you'd kill for a drink the minute you leave the AA meeting. No wonder she needed some home truths from the Dashing Doctor Dan.

But what's this? What's this we hear? Are you leaving us Doctor Dan? Who are these Peace Doctors anyway? You could hear the NOOOOOOOOOO all the way in Greenock when our medical genius announced that he's leaving. But let's hope he gets a good send off if he is deserting Shieldinch for pastures new.

Next week:
Is Don Raymondo finally standing up to Shady Sean? And - we can't even bear to think about it - could Will be cheating on our Robbie?

Quote of the week:
Leyla: It's not like I was knocking back cans on the steps of the library or anything!
Sees man sitting next to her who has clearly done just that.
Leyla: ...uh....sorry.

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