BBC HomeExplore the BBC
This page has been archived and is no longer updated. Find out more about page archiving.

24 September 2014
Black CountryBlack Country

BBC Homepage
»BBC Local
Black Country
Things to do
People & Places
Religion & Ethics
Arts and Culture
BBC Introducing
TV & Radio

Nearby Sites

Hereford & Worcs

Related BBC Sites


Contact Us

By web user Peter Bounce from Walsall
Black Country jokes
Black Country dialect

A page of Black Country jokes, poems or stories - compiled by Peter Bounce.


Use the alphabet links below to have a look at a selection of words that typify the Black Country accent.


Black Country poet - Carol Midwood

More about the Black Country dialect

Black Country jokes

About the Black Country

2006 update:
Find out more about the dialect and add your comments


View a printable version of this page.
get in contact


We` ad a dog nex` dower, barkin` it wud`nt stop,
So o` thaw`t od` gee it `ond, wi` the elp o` me mother`s prop, so o` powked it threw the fence, each time it barked un yapped,
Then wun day e` grabbed it, un bit it til` it snapped.

Me babby” that`s wot the od`e lady called it, the one that lived nex dower,
“Wus e` doin` t` yo? thus wood all over the flowa,
“Now cum on me little darlin`, his dad`ll soon be back,O`ll tell im what he`s dun, he`s sure t` get a smack.”

So wen me dad cum um ,un o` tode im wat o`d dun, How o`d fought the beast nex’ dower, with the prop un neera gun,
How he`d tryed t` jump the fence, un savage is little kid,
How with the help o` me mother`s prop,un a metal dustbin lid,

Now me dad wor` avin` non o` it, cus e` knew me e` wus me dad!
The od`e lady nex` dower, ad tode im o` wus a liy`a, un ar` wus bad.
He grabbed me by the earhole, un slung me cross his lap, e` pulled me trouser`s round me knee`s, un gid me but a slap,

Now wen od` finished blartin, o` wiped the tear`s from me eye`s,un O` wus snivellin in the gardin` shed, plottin` the dogs demize,
now o` could`nt use the prop, cus it wus broke, as ya` know,
so o` searched round the gardin` ,lookin fer summat t` throw,

Now o` found un arf` en` ducker, un o` thawt` jus the job,
o`ll wait till the od`e mon`s gone t` werk, un o`ll chuck it at the dog,
o`ll stand by the fence, un bide me time, un wen o` get the chance,
if the coast`s all clear,o`ll throw the brick, un mek the varmint dance,

now wat o` day` know, wus the lady, in er` wisdom, ad let im goo,
so o` stood by the fence wi` me arf` end brick wunderin` wat t` do,
on earin` a growl behind me ,o` trembled un feared the werst
so o` turned round quick, t` see me dad wi` a stick,un the dog staring in me ferse.

gertcha ya` bloody varmint,of catched ya` in the act,
if ya` gunna throw the brick, yo`de berra be quick,cus this dogs really fast.
well o` day throw it did I, o` jus scarpered quick as o` cud,
un even thou o` wus runnin, o` felt the wind, of that piece o`wood.
un wi` that dog snappin` at me heels, un the ode` mon breathin smoke,
,o` woe be gooin dowen that road agen, unless o` course ,the varmints on a rope.

“BOUNCE” - from Walsall

Top | Features Index | Home
more from this section

Walk Through Time
Fish and trip
Urban Forest Walks

Reviews, clubs, gigs...

Ocean's Twelve is out soon
Search by Film
Or by Cinema
bullet Latest film reviews

Find out more on what activities are available for a fun-filled family day out in the Black Country area.

red bullet Outdoors red bullet Museums
red bullet Art galleries red bullet Dudley Zoo
BBC Black Country Website
The Mailbox
West Midlands
B1 1RF
Tel: 0121 567 6000

About the BBC | Help | Terms of Use | Privacy & Cookies Policy