Read what others have said..

Professor Gautam Appa, London School of Economics
An excellent programme. But why not point out that the real problem is forced marraige.But how do we change this? No doubt girls like Monica of your programme will force a change. But can we not provide examples of happily married and high achieving couples of 'mixed' marraiges in the media to make it more acceptable? One of my Muslim students has just married a Hindu dentist. On visiting his family she was asked to wear a Tilak and join in Hindu prayers. The Hindu husband is a non-believer. My studnet said she joined in not to offend his parents but continues to say her Namaz every day in the privacy of her room. There are other couples I know. A seemingly liberal muslim family would not allow their daughte to marry a Welsh boy unless he converted. He did, to marry her. No one forced anyone except perhaps love. More of a Romeo Juliet scene as Arun Kundnani said then forced anything.

Dave, London
Very interesting debate, but the people I blame are the parents, where is your control over your kids? Look out for them, be aware of what there doing

Ravi London
just to add, that i know many girls in ilford, which is mostly populated with both muslums and sikhs, and have found that all these converwsions are in fact true. Many stories have been told where sikh girls would go out with muslims guys where everything would run good for a while, but when they would reach the sex topic many young sikh girls do objects but mNY OFTEN ARE raped and made preganant. One knowing that they are preganant they know the cannot stay in their religion knowing what there parents would think and so convert to islam. This is a major problem in today, and weather you like it or not our sikh and hindu girls are being converted by the day. We have to teach our youngsters about our religions, and make then stand by it if they are forced to convert.

A Sikh.
I have no tolerance for anyone who converts someone else. I was subject to conversion attempts by Christians while at University, and was as punjabi as it gets everytime they approached me ;-). If these inter-religious marriages are a result of love, as some naiive people suggest below, then surely the relationship does not require conversion? Also, in this multi-cultural environement it's difficult for some people to draw lines when they are already a miniority, i.e. brown skinned people, which is probably why these young people congregate at University. This is also why it is easily exploited by unfriendly people. University is tough. I remember being very confused at times. I've never taken my kara off, and I recommend to every Sikh to do the same. The Sikh heritage is unique and has been won, quite literally, by the lives of your ancestors. Think of that whenever you asked to convert to something else. Finally, if you find the Gurudwara confusing, there are plenty of English translations that you read. Put a bit of energy, and read them!

sonny
i don't believe most these girls are forced to convert, they date a muslim fall in love and are asked to convert in order to get married and they do like in the documantry, but at the same time i have heard and know a girl who's boyfriend started turning her life hell because he had asked her to marry him and that she would need to convert were she had objected and said know, he went on to torture her by breaking her house windows calling her house and making death threats but she was to scared to speak up and tell her parants because she worried they would disown her for dating a muslim, but eventually she had gone and told a group of sikhs what had bin going on and they had gone and dealt with the muslim and made the problem go away for the girl.

Kam, London
I think girls who change their religion are the ones to blame. Your religion is your identity and if you change that what do you have left to be recognised by?

Jim, UK
Whether the stories portrayed in this program are truthfull or not I would like to say that in my experience all conservative religious people/groups/communities are 'aggressive' in their implementation of their faith and religious tradition which seems when it suits to be inseperable from cultural tradition. There is a strong whiff of Fascism to all the 'over the top reactions' by parents, male siblings and communities to people getting together irrespective of their religion or lack of, and inspite of their colour or racial(to use a none PC word) background. The time is long overdue for conservative religious groups/people to chill out and examine the nature and roots of their virulent hatred of other faiths and non believers and their denial of fundemental rights to members of their own faith, usually women, whenever they want to think independently 'outside the box'. Continued below....

Jim, UK
Continued from above...We very rarely here any criticism of the myriad transgressions by male members of faith communities, those hypocrites who are always so vocal, banging on about the right and wrong path in their religion and how offended they are when other express an opinion they dont agree with, the same people who remind everyone of their rights whilst reaching for the defence offered by a SECULAR system of government and jurisprudence which applies to all people/races, all faiths and all sexes. Not being religious does not make you a lesser person, does not make you evil or and does not make you feel insecure in the wider world but it does allow you to think outside the religious/community/tribal box and see things from a different perspective. It is human nature to resist and transcend senseless and restrictive rules, practices and beliefs which have not kept pace with modern society or been reformed. Spouting religious doctrine is one thing living with other people is something else and requires the concept of doubt, welcome to reality!

imran. leeds
my sons mother is sikh and i am muslim.SHE wanted to convort but her father said he would kill her. is that not force? forcing her to leave me and stay in a religion she does not believe in?

Birmingham
Young people change themselves and their ideas alot. I chose not to follow my religion from when i was 14-17 i suppose i could say this is the fault of my athiest friends, it's all so clear now i was pressurised by my athiest friends to not follow any religion. It was harassment if only i knew that then! Young people are whimsical they change the way they are again and again. Peer pressure makes you want to dress in a certain way, how to tak, who to be friends with and seeing as religion is now a fad, peer pressure again can influence religion. I'm muslim, my best friend is an athiest she's asked me questions like 'why do you only eat halal meat?' 'why do you pray in that direction?' etc. Without her asking i've told her quiet abit about my faith so that she better understands why i do what i do, judging by what alot of the people on this board have said i'm trying to force her to convert, quick someone help her. I go to alot of sikh and hindu festivals most of my friends are sikh's and hindu's when they invite me to these things am i being forced to convert?

Kaur, Smethwick
I am a 14yr old sikh girl and would never consider converting to another religion-I believe youth of all religions need knowledge of their own AND other religions. Hindus and Sikhs were forced to convert to Islam centuries ago and our Gurus defended our faith under immense torture! Today conversion stil hppens bt the torture comes in the form of grooming and bribery...it also happens because girls are naive and would fall for any guy who pay attention2them. I'm not trying to put Islam down in any way because i respect all religions. Sum1 wrote this in their comment 'as for a guy, i think its a simple saying of he is bringing wealth in to the family, not taking it away!' So if a guy marries a girl of a diff religion its gaining wealth 4the family? So if a sikh/hindu/christian girl is converted its nt bcos of love but2bring wealth? Girls need to learn about their own religions and talk to parents if they are doubting their faith.Just want 2 end by saying we are a new generation 2day and the sikh youth in particular are becoming more aware of their culture and religion. I hope forced conversion won't b ignored or denied but destroyed. xX

Jay, Northampton
Why is it titled 'Kaur to Khan'? That alone is the usual 'muslim' bashing headline as always and to say Sikhs converted to muslims only. Conversion occurs in all religions, even forced, to say or to title it from one faith to another is to cause animosity from the start? BBC should have more sense.But to the subject it is wrong in any religion, any situation. There are many reasons for it from lack of education, lack of esteem, lack of understading, stupidy, ignorance and many more reasons, take your pick.

Aman, Kent
When I was living in Birmingham (2004) I was shown some flyers which were given to one of my female friends (a medical professional) which basically said that Sikh girls are easy. When they get drunk take this as an opportunity to take advantage :S This letter also included other disturbing comments. Aside from this I have not directly seen any evidence of this.

Amardeep Singh London
Muslims writing comments saying Sikh girls convert at there own free will are probably the people trying to force these girls. If Sikh boys went around trying to convert Muslim girls there would be widespread uproar. Since 9/11 the media has become sympathetic towards Muslims and so there is less coverage of such concerning issues effecting other religions other than Islam. If somebody is aware of someone being forced to convert to Islam a firm stance should be taken against this. Also Muslim clerics who preach Islam is a peaceful religion should preach not to forcefully convert these girls, however these young Muslims are not getting these ideas themselves and are obviously being fed information at Mosques or other institutes.

Asif, Birmingham
Mixed relationships happen in a multi-cultural society. There is a small percentage of boys be it muslim or sikh that target girls of other faiths. However, by brandishing statements such as 'white and other females being targetted by muslim males for ulterior motives' is offensive. People forget 99.9% of Muslims are moderate and good people.People are quick to bad-mouth Muslims, without looking at the whole picture. Making statements referring to rapes committed by Muslims during the partition of India and Pakistan is completely one-sided, and fails to acknowledge the fact that atrocities were committed on both sides. People often forget the fact that Muslims are not monsters, but humans just like everyone else. The British Asian community, by jumping on the bandwagon by targeting Muslims, are playing a dangerous game, by adhering to the demands of organisations such as the BNP. Only recently were rumours circulated by the BNP concerning plans to build a huge mosque, which Sikhs and Hindus were quick to condemn in huge numbers. People are correct when they talk of ignorance, not only towards their own faiths, but towards Islam.

Ron, Manchester
A very poor report, where was the investigation - merely taking extreme, naive and inept quotes and presenting them with no challenge or context gave this report a feeling of doing it for the sake of doing it. stick to bollywood and bhangra.

Sukhdev Birmingham (cont)
The point being that it works both ways. Girls are converting for the sake of being a relationship that is unlikely to last! Once these relationships break down then they revert back to their original religion for help. Cases of forced marriages do exist- anyone who disagrees, i'm sorry is just plain wrong.

Yo!!
answer to your qustion Mr Singg is that would you give your sister away to a family that is not within your culture or religion so easily.. no because you want to make sure that no harm comes to her in regards to this in the future... as for a guy, i think its a simple saying of he is bringing wealth in to the family, not taking it away!!!

Amin, London
If the alleged is true and girls are forced into converting because they are scared, threatened, then of course thats wrong and it should be investigated and I feel that should start at university, where I first noticed the divide between religious groups. However if ladies convert as they are unhappy with their current way of life/religion then thats their choice. Religion is a way of life and should be respected and not abused and there are people out there trying to create a rift amongst religions on the basis of forced conversions etc. Ladies, you should know what you want and you should not be forced to do anything you do not want to do! Thats common sense! This is what infuriates me, the lack of respect that some women have for themselves these days to be coerced into doing something they do not want to do. If you are in scared, seek help.

Saira Khalsa, London
For those who do believe such secretive campaigns of conversion are just urban myth, please refer to www.faithfreedom.org for important articles that should be considered when forming your opinions.The movement for ex-muslims and secularism has over 70,000 members in the United Kingdom. They believe that this figure should be closer to 600,000 but many people are living in fear in the UK due to the societal norms within the "Muslim ghettos" in inner city areas of the UK.

Davinder Singh
Why is a Muslim man allowed to marry a non Islamic woman, yet a Islamic Woman is not allowed to marry a non Islamic Man?Davinder Singh, Birmingham.

MR Khan
I am disappointed to hear some of the comments made in this program. If anything as forced conversion is happening then we (Muslims) should be informed of this as this is very sensitive issue and can have very adverse impact among asian communities. I would request the listeners to please bring this to the Police attention so that if there is a problem then we should address. However equally I would request to be responsible and do not spread hatred without evidence and facts. I would plea to the audiences please do not jump on the band wagon to target muslims. Muslims are already been pushed to the wall after 9/11 and 7/7 therefore please do consider that Muslims are also human like you, they have families, they too hav brothers, sisters and mothers as you.

Narmis, London
At one time there weren't any records of domestic violence within our community either. That didn't mean it didn't exist. As it became less taboo to report these incidents, we found out just how prevalent the problem was. So in the same light - just because we don't have the statistics suggesting 'forced conversion' exists, it can by no means deny its existence within our community. Often times these problems become classified under other titles which becomes problematic since we then don't have the numbers to confirm that young women are being manipulated to change their faith for "love".

kiran west midlands
i think that a sikh and muslim are two differnt religion and we have different faiths so why should we mix them??!! we are both and asians and thats about it!!

Naz, West Midlands
Conversion is not a decision to take lightly i suppose all young asians thinking about conversions think about the odds and evens, i understand some girls will probably convert for their love because they feel weaker. But the true underlying question is this for real?will he do that for me if tables were turned? if so, and you have thought about this carefully. Can you live thier culture and in their society by the teachings of their religion? if not, then you are weak you should not leave your faith just because his family will not accept you only if you believe in the religion, should you consider conversion because many asians do it for acceptance and that is seen as force, to the religion the individual is leaving behind. Love is not about that you fell for that indvidual the way that individual was you can't ask for that off of them only if they want it will they do it. Only people who have done this can answer your questions of force? so stop bickering this is multi cultured society, we live as inviduals and should have the mind of making our own decsions and are reponsible only for our own actions. Peace and out! X

Deepy - South East London
I thinks its an issue/subject which is incredibly sensitive but incredibly importent to tackle. This happened to a childhood friend of mine two years ago now. I have seen the tension it has caused amongst the family and the entire community. I credit Asian Network for addressing/investigating it, and trying to draw some understanding towards something that has caused so much tension, hatred and violence.

Ramesh Birmingham
I live in Birmingham and in the city there is a huge problem not only with sikh but also hindu , white and other females being targetted by muslim males for ulterior motives , the real problem is lack of education and understanding amongst females regarding their own faiths , i work in social services in the city and the number of cases i have heard of and come across where naive young sikh and hindu females who have been in relationships with muslim males only to leave home and eventually end up after pregnancy in womens refuges or social housing is disturbing The problem is not so much to do with forced conversions but naivety amongst indian femalesThe fact is that indian females are not thinking about the implications of entering a mixed faith relationship when they decided to date muslim males , yet the irony is years or months later after realising their mistake it is to little to late.You only have to go to area's like handsworth,smethwick and wolverhampton to see how this problem is causing so much animosity between asians in the city

Ram
It is not “Forced” it is faults conversation I know not one or two bur a lot of girls , who says I am IN LOVE but turn out they have to convert to have that love and they know that one they go out with Muslim they can not come back …that is the problem

Tony, reading
has this program been written by 5 yr olds? or 30 yr olds with a 5 yr olds brain? have you actually looked at any facts or figures or just gone on the street and asked the muslims "do you force ppl to convert. Do you think any one in their right mind would admit it on a radio station?

Sukhi
Well i have heard of a few muslim methods of converting young sikhs to islam!

Asif, Notts
There are no police records of a single forced conversion. Maybe this is because "forced" converisons do not exist. Surely if these forced conversions were so common, at least one or two of the girls would have been able to get to a police staiton and get help? or are all the girls monitored 24/7 for the rest of their lives? sounds a bit impossible doesn't it?There are a lot of sikh girls who convert to Islam, for whatever usual, usually because they want to marry a pakistani guy. Maybe the claim they are forced to convert is just a cover-up that a lot of sikh girls are choosing to be with pakistani guys?i am not trying to start a big argument, but its just a point of view, one that is backed up by what i have seen around me.

Liane - England
I hadn't heard about this 'forced' conversions.However when I was living in a town with a high Asian population, I casually mentioned to a friend how much I was getting chatted-up everytime I left the house and he told me that the young Muslim men in this area, were being told to take a non-muslim wife because she would automatically then become a Muslim.So maybe these women have had a Muslim boyfriend and converted of their own choice, but their families think it was done forcably? Just a theroy.

Nikki Kaur (Coventry)
A man at the end of the discussion at 10am, made some very valuble comments, and my only wish is more asians had the same beliefs.Religion is all about love and asians use thier religion as an excuse to express their uneducted/ignorant views, some of them don't even understand their religion (importance)and follow the crowd for comfort and mis guided security.It makes them feel part of their society not religion sad really because they have no idea what they are missing out on. Peace of mind is the greatest qualification we could ever have.

Amardeep Singh London
The Kaur to Khan rumours are not so much rumours as facts, young Sikh girls are being influenced by Muslim guys in converting to Islam. They are often spun a web of lies promising them a better life if they convert, this is never the case. Sikh girls should remember the Sikhs who died for Sikhs to continue living. During the partition in India, Sikhs killed other sikh females so that they would not have the shame of a member of their family being raped by Muslims, it seems Sikh girls have forgotten this and are now willing to convert. Turn to friends, members of family or the police for help, however these conversions have to stop and i urge Sikhs to take a stance against this.

sajid
all dese r rumours.. if sikh gals wanna convert dey convert at der own free willl... no1 forces dem .. der has been no evdince of dis... ppl say dis n dat gal been forced but no gal actually cumz 4 ward to say she been forced... sikhs c dat muslims r been labelled as terrorists so dey decide try to de grade muslims even more but in fact dey r degrading dem selves.

Rita London
It is forced in the sense that some Muslim guys are dishonest to the girls that they would have to convert in order to get married. Some Muslim guys wear the Sikh bangle to mislead the girls initially, regarding their religion to get the girls interested in them.I am led to understand that some of the Muslim guys target Sikh girls at clubs, enter a relationship with the intention to convert them.The Sikh girls are normally not brought up to discriminate against other faiths, so the argument made by some Muslims that the problem lies with the girls faith in her religion, is weak. I think love is a powerful emotion that can be exploited in such a premeditated fashion.

harith, west midlands
i find these allegations extremely amusing. i have had sikhs showing me letters by 'muslims' for 'muslims' offering rewards of up to 5000 pounds to convert a sikh girl. i mean come on, people get a grip!allegations such as these can so easily be disproven. so please my sikh brothers and sisters let you're brains breath a little and think with a little more common sense.

NARINDER, CHANDIGARH, (WOLVERHAMPTON)
I am a Sikh and we have been hearing about such 'forced' conversions for years. I have yet to meet anybody who has changed religion. I have friends from all of these religions with whom I work and meet socially. A few months ago we had an e-mail sent to the Sikhs and Hindus 'warning' about so called 'conversions'. I work for a large government law enforcement department. There seems to be no evidence so people should stop spreading such rumours about our Muslim brothers and sisters.

J K, Frankfurt
It is a marginal issue, but an important one that needs to be looked at seriously by the Police across the country. If white girls can be groomed for sex and conversion in Yorkshire, for which three men were convicted earlier this month. I would find it highly likely that Sikh and Hindu girls are targets in areas with great concentrations, i.e. in the West Midlands and London. Educating all Sikh and Hindu children in the virtues of their respective faith's and by supporting those who have been victims to speak out in their own communities, rather than chastising them is the only way forward to create a structure whereby people, especially women, can seek confidential guidance as to whether the relationship they are undertaking is likely to be genuine or not and whether there is a genuine case of coerced conversion occuring.

Jethro.Kandasamy ,West Sussex
I am of Srilankan orign and there is a lot of conversion to Christianity in my community and nobody bothers to shout aganist it.if the Muslims are keen to convert others to Islam as you sugest i might have come a cross somebody who have converted to Islam,I have not.So it may not be the case within people i know.

Taz, Nottingham
What a joke!!! The problem here is that when a sikh girl goes out with a muslim boy, she's too weak to stand by her religion and see's the only option to be with her man is to convert. Whereas when a muslim girl goes out with a sikh, it's alot less likely for her to turn away from here religion in order to gain her man. It's just the way it is. I'm not saying it doesn't happened but alot less muslim girls and boys turn to sikhism than they do to Islam.

Yo!!
Islam does not pressure anyone into making changes in their religion.. it a decision that an individual would make if they felt the wished to convert. also if people are converting to islam it does not mean people are getting forced, it could also mean there must be something in this religion they must see that makes them convert. islam is a religion of peace and nothing else!!!

harry marwa,birmingham
i think its an hidden agenda and we can only blame the women for not being stong enough to uphold there religion. Im not against mix marriages or mix religion relationships. my point is dont loose yr identity and yr past girls. it may be something u regret.

R in the Commonwealth of Virginia
I see it as a lack of education. People are easily influenced and succumb to persistence and peer pressure when they have little knowledge on a subject. However, others can have an aggressive demeanor. But, remember one thing, this is only a percentage of a group that is behind the so-called rumors. Also, keep in mind that things happened in the past because of extremist ideology and we must not generalize and alienate people for that.

Kiran, Birmingham
I think that these conversions are happening and both sikhs and muslims need to work together to stop them happening

Taxiwallah
Aren't these just urban myths? Why not investigate the appearance of UFOs over Luton... It's true, it happened. My mate's sister's maths tutor was walking down the road and he met his uncle who told him that his brother in law's parole officer saw a UFO. And then a alien came down and forced her to convert to Islam....

Amjad
I believe the whole concept of Sikh woman voluntarily choosing to follow, and practice Islam voluntarily an alien concept. Traditionally speaking pre-partition of the sub continent Muslims in terms of the caste system where treated by Sikhs and Hindus as lower down that untouchables. The concept of a Sikh; regarded as a higher up in the caste system converting to a faith associated with those low of the lowest is unbearable on some Sikhs. Add the fact that Muslims and Sikhs where traditional enemies in the Punjab. You mainly get right wing Sikhs preaching of alleged forced conversions. I have yet to see or hear of a such a victim in person or on TV/radio from a reputable source.I would also like to draw your attention to the actions of Sikh men during partition where large amounts of woman where killed in cold blood, massacred in the fear they may be left behind and raped, or convert to Islam in what is now Pakistan i.e. where unable to migrate to the Indian side of border. Unfortunately some of the Sikh community still have the same mentality 60 years later in the UK.

sheena
During my time at uni i came across so many girls who voluntarily converted to islam not because they were forced to do so but they chose to do this. Several of my friends are on the verge of converting some who have been fasting and praying for a long time but have not taken the step to full conversion. We cannot reponse on rumour that this is being forced upon individuals, we our selves make choices. No imam will force an individual to convert, no bf would do such a thing and if it were to happen - why get yourself into these situations? we are in a society of choices & freedom.