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6 Music DJs worst lyrics ... ever!
The great and the good from 6 Music choose their selection of worse lyrics ever.
Nemone NEMONE
Red Hot Chili Peppers - Snow (Hey Oh)
 
Ok I think the lyrics to Snow speak for themselves. But if not then how about this little addition from the lunchtime team….another stanza to add to the chorus:

(Keidis) Hey oh listen what I say oh
I got your Hey oh
now listen what I say oh


(6 Music lunchtime team) Way-oh
This is how we play-oh
Every day-oh
On the show-ow


Come to think of it….that's not so bad is it?
Nemone's pages
gideon coe GIDEON COE
Queen - Fat Bottomed Girls

Never underestimate the power of the dodgy lyric to brighten even the darkest day. Altogether now. "Are you really gonna do it this time, are you..etc X100.

I hesitate to stand in judgement in the lyrics of others having been responsible for some corkers myself. However, these were enjoyed by a select few people who witnessed them at gigs in villages in East Kent or on some tape or other. If you're in a behemoth of a rock band bringing enjoyment to millions then you can probably deal with some upstart DJ having a pop at some of your work. And with that in mind, I have no beef with Brian May. Admittedly, I didn't enjoy his antics at the start of the solemn state occasion that was the Queen's birthday but then that's my problem. Having enjoyed some of Queen's early work (nothing wrong with the lyrics on Tie Your Mamma Down) I was excited by the prospect of a double a-side release in 1978 though I was obviously 24/7 into to nothing but punk rock/new wave at the time (ahem).

When it arrived though I could just about cope with the pre global warming tribute to the two-wheeler on bicycle race.  I had trouble with the following, let alone the embarrassment it caused when I heard it on the radio while in the company of adults.

Hey I was just a skinny lad
Never knew no good from bad
But I knew life before I left my nursery
Left alone with big fat Fanny
She was such a naughty nanny
Heap big woman you made a bad boy out of me
Hey hey!


Life has taught me not to take lyrics literally, especially after a confusing conversation with Nik Kershaw but this one has haunted me ever since. No offence Brian.
Gideon's pages
Chris Hawkins CHRIS HAWKINS
Des'ree - Life

The worst, most trite and utterly ridiculous lyrics and forced rhymes, for me, come courtesy of 90s pop songstress Des apostrophe Ray and her 1998 top ten smash, Life...the pointless rhymes really are extraordinary : 
 
Ooh, I get the shivers,
I don't want to see a ghost,,
It's a sight that I fear most,
I'd rather have a piece of toast,
And watch the evening news.

Chris Hawkins' pages
Tom Robinson TOM ROBINSON
Depeche Mode - People Are People


One of the unexpected benefits of only ever having had a small handful of chart hits myself is that most of my own really monumentally awful lyrics have been mercifully forgotten by posterity. To be honest there are a couple that are so cringe worthy I've deleted them from the official discography on my website in the hope that no-one will notice.

As for glib shallow lyrics that anyone might actually have heard of, where do you start? "People Are People" for instance is very far from Depeche Mode's finest hour, with its deathless chorus:

"People are people so why should it be
You and I should get along so awfully"


But such is their way with a catchy tune that it didn't stop them scoring a Top 5 hit with it in 1984. It's galling to admit - having made living as a lyricist for over 20 years - but maybe people don't listen to the words of songs as much as some of us would like to think.
Tom's Pages
Jon Richardson JON RICHARDSON
Rhythm Is A Dancer - Snap

I don't consider myself at all qualified to criticise other people's lyrics, not having released anything of my own... But since you asked, I think "Rhythm Is A Dancer" by Snap does deserve a mention for letting down music and ruining an otherwise decent tune. The line in question is

I'm serious as cancer,
When I say rhythm is a dancer.


Aside from the obvious problem of a blatant over-estimation of the importance and destructive power of dance, I've never been a big fan of grammatical inaccuracy to help lyrics scan better. Nevertheless, nice song.
Jon Richardson on 6 Music
Marc Riley MARC RILEY
Sting - Fill Her Up

If we should concern ourselves with the lyrical content of what is usually regarded as throwaway re-cycle able pop nonsense then at least we can rely on Sting to scale new depths when it comes to stylised twaddle.

He may look good in a vest but lets be frank, a Bernie Taupin to his Elton John would not have gone unappreciated.

FILL HER UP (1999)

Mobile station, Where I stand, This old gas pump
In my hand. The Boss don't like me, Face like a weasel ,All on my hands
The smell of diesel. Here comes the big shot, Here he comes! From the city.
God Damn! A V-8 engine, She runs so pretty. Woo! Fill 'er up son….With unleaded.”

Marc's pages
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